A/N: I feel so touched by all these kind reviews. It's so fun to hear that this fun for other people too!
Recap. Previously on Kidnapped:After following Bella's kidnapping from Edward, Alice took her to the Cullen home so she and her family could protect Bella from Edward. She and Carlisle communicated with Charlie, who believes she and Edward are both sick. Edward apologizes.
Attempting (murder)
My mind sped even faster than my feet as I ran to Fork - both an indistinguishable blur. My rational facilities limited as they were, I experienced what I imagined it'd be like to dream. Vivid multisensorial visions of the girl - of her screams, of her smile, of her corpse, of her wedding, of her smell - enveloped the conscious mind. An acute torture that struck me with the only physical pain I'd felt since I'd begun my cursed existence.
I knew that the girl would die by my hands. It was inevitable as the rise of the sun. Despite the immense physical, emotional, mental pain that came with the thought, it also came with an eerily calm certainty. I prayed for an alternative outcome - a way to save her - but I also knew that prayers weren't heard when spoken by creatures like me.
Again, I felt the frustration of my helplessness. The anger I felt toward Carlisle - who, in my wild mind, resembled less a father and more a cold-hearted judge - surged into something murderous. When I killed the girl - and it was a matter of if, not when - I would kill him, too, for forcing me into it.
My "family" - in their unwillingness to do what it takes to protect the girl - suddenly seemed nothing short of my enemies.
If nobody would help me, nobody would save her as she deserved, then I would punish them for their crimes as accomplices. I would cleanse the world from the bane of any creature willing to risk her harm - most importantly, of course, myself.
Once the girl was dead, there would be no reason to refrain from going to the Vulturi for respite. The Volturi. Of course, if the Volturi hadn't had the pernicious policy against informed humans, I could have prevented the girl's death by ridding the world from my presence, too.
Ah, so the Volturi were guilty as well.
How could I punish them, so well fortified as they were? I could infiltrate them, I supposed. Or I could pick them off, a couple at a time.
For a moment, I wildly wondered if I ought to rid the world of vampires altogether. It was only a matter of time before the girl came across a bloodthirsty vampire, with her luck.
This savage storm of machinations entertained me, providing me with a mad sort of hope that carried me through the destitution. I wondered idly if there would be any entity willing to torture me prior to my decease…
Before I knew it, I neared my home - I realized with a shock that the unusual scatter-mindedness left me entirely without a plan. The thought lasted only a fragment of a second, and then I saw her and thought nothing at all.
Bella!
I smiled; an odd elation rushed through me as I rushed to her.
BellaBellaBellaBella.
I felt myself restrained and I laughed wildly, a roar erupting from my lips.
"Vampire."
I froze, shocked. Reality crashed down on me. So caught up in the fairytale I'd constructed, I hadn't dealt with the anguish of what happens now.
I kill her.
I cocked my head curiously at the girl, memorizing her visage.
Oh, Edward. The mourning in Alice's thoughts threatened my dissociation, and I felt rage once more.
"How long are you going to keep this up for, Alice?" I laughed again. Cat and mouse - how scared will we make the mouse before this ends?
Alice played the future in my head. She responded, Don't do it, Edward. You don't have to do this. But I could see in her mind that I did.
"It's just going to get worse for her, so drop the act. You're not doing her any favors by drawing this out." The girl's eyes bore into mine.
I could feel the somatic sensation of her terror as if it were my own - her heart thundered in my skull, driving nails in my lungs, making it impossible to think and breathe.
Don't mind the future - just hold out a moment at a time, Alice thought. Look, you're not killing her now, right?
"No," I spat. "I can taste her fear from here."
You know, there is another option…
A monstrous image, terrifyingly haunting - the girl as the monster she feared so much.
"THERE IS NO OTHER OPTION!"
In the heat of horror, I struck out, taking them by surprise. I lunged, using momentum to swing Jasper further from Emmett, setting myself right in the center. As Emmett jumped toward me, I narrowly dodged - Emmett rammed Jasper and they both came down like bowling pins.
Finally. We're almost there, Isabella, I promised the angel, rushing toward the glass.
Smells. So. Good.
I skidded to a stop just before crashing into the glass.
No.
No, God, no.
Alice stood beside the girl, her thoughts incoherent with bloodlust. I just need to… hold… on.
"Alice," the girl whimpered.
Her heart skipped, as did mine.
"Wha- no, no, Alice! I'm Bella, Bella. Don't do this, Alice. Please, Alice."
Tears streamed down her face.
This was exactly what I'd been hoping to avoid.
I snarled at her. Alice would be the first to die, I decided.
"Calm down, Bella, I'm not going to kill you," she whispered. Well, not in the way you think, at least, she qualified mentally.
This is the other option, Edward, Alice thought pointedly.
Nothing could encapsulate my fury. I was a statue, frozen in terror at the prospect of the very worst possible outcome - the loss of her soul.
"Then what-"
"I'll kill you, Alice." She and I both saw it happening - but we also saw the future flicker as I wavered. "Don't you dare."
"You're not giving her another option, Edward," Esme chimed in.
I forced my gaze on the glass barrier between the girl and I as other other feelings began to cut in again. It was hard to maintain a murderous rage with Esme around. No, I can't lose this. Be strong, Edward. Two sides of an invisible wall - one side was the cruel wilderness, but on the other was the warmth of artificial light. Just a moment m-
"Look at Isabella now, Edward." Slowly, Carlisle approached the barrier. I growled softly. Look at these handprints, he mused as if he didn't have an audience. So soft, reaching out for our help. He pressed his palm against the glass and smiled gently at the girl. We will protect you. "She's still alive."
I felt the thirst compounded as everyone considered the scent in the air concurrently.
I fought a gasp for air. "No, she's already dead." The vision of her corpse was so real, so immediate. Only minutes away, now. "I've killed her. Bella."
I didn't notice the uncertainty pouring in from Jasper until he put his hand on my shoulder. I thought about shaking it off, but couldn't commit to the action.
"Listen mate, she's obviously still alive." Eying her, Emmett added, "Not very lively, sure, but she's definitely kicking." Pretty tough stuff, I like that.
I smiled. Of course she would still win my family over even in these circumstances.
She smiled at me. If my heart could burst, it would.
Hers behaved likewise - and I could taste it again, like I had all those nights before. I clearly terrified her, and with reason.
I turned sharply before my gaze could wander from her lips to her neck.
"Look at her," I started softly. "Clearly terrified. Shaking. Are we doing her any favors by torturing her so, when we already know the outcome? Her number is up, her death has been slated - and I the unlucky executioner. Get off your high horses," I spat. "Do you really think a couple days of life like that is worth 'saving'-" I would have finished, "when death is the only reprieve?" but the girl interrupted me before I could.
"Not worth saving?" I watched in horror as Isabella turned into a crying tomato, her face bright red as water leaked from her oculi. " "Not worth saving? Maybe you should have thought of that before you saved me from that stupid van. It's not my fault you can't stick to a single flipping decision!"
I- "Isabella," I gasped.
She was angry.
"What, is this so casual to you, Edward. My life on the flip of a coin? Heads, you try to save my life - tails, you try to save it?" She slammed fists on the barrier, crying, and I winced.
This isn't working, I thought with frustration.
No- oh Bella, Alice panicked, reaching for Bella.
Bella yanked her hand away.
Ouch, Alice thought.
"Gosh, I really can't believe I read you so wrong." The world could have burst into flames and I wouldn't have noticed. "I really felt bad for you, can you believe that?"
"No, I can't, I-" I was speechless.
"I thought you didn't want to kill me. But I was wrong. I misunderstood you. I'm sorry I ever mistook you for anything other than a monster."
Her words broke me.
Monster.
The only girl in the world and she finally saw me for what I am.
Monster.
"Is that so hard to prevent, Edward?"
The monster reflected in Carlisle's eyes. "Where's my son?"
Edward Cullen in a monster.
A murderous monster of the night.
While I relived those scarring moments in my mind's eye, Alice's revisited a memory of her own -
Bella looked up at me with wide, shining eyes, Alice recalled. "This is all so unreal. And Edward - I was so shaken and I feel so bad. I made him like this, Alice, didn't I? I made him into some kind of monster, right?"
How could you, Bella? It's Edward, he's the- Alice's gaze shot up as she realized the directions of her own thoughts.
Oh, Edward, I didn't mean - you know I -
I gritted my teeth, nodding infinitesimally. At least we were all in agreeance, here.
The girl sighed and her eyes melted. "Look, Edward…" she qualified but I could not process her words or their meaning. I could feel their intentions, however. And, in the most propitious evidence of grace this world has ever seen, she lifted her hand and placed it on the glass and smiled.
I lifted my hand to mirror hers, and I saw heaven in her eyes.
It felt something like hope.
.
.
.
A/N: I would die for Darkward. TT﹏TT What did you think?
