AN: Welcome back dear readers to the newest instalment of Last Rose! Bit of a shorter chapter this time around, been a busy month training for a new job so less time/energy to write. Hopefully when I get fully into the job and build up a routine I should have a better balance to write.

But hey, we finally start the Chunin Exams, for real this time! Woo! It only took like three additional chapters! I'm calling this a win for Murderous!

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this newest chapter!


Chapter 10: I'm just a Sexy Boy (Sexy Boy)


Today was the day.

After months of delays, which were almost certainly in part my own fault, The Chunin Exams had finally arrived.

The fact I wasn't currently freaking the hell out was a minor miracle, to be honest. By all rational thought, I should be shitting myself and yet I actually felt confident. More confident than Sakura had been in the original run through of these events, at the very least. Though, my team and I were quite a bit stronger than our Canon counterparts at this point.

We could do this. I could do this.

Pulling on a long glove that came up past my elbow, I attached a series of metal plates to the fabric, matching the one I had on the other arm. With that, my outfit was complete.

I'd long since abandoned the dresses that my counterpart was known for, switching for much more practical clothing. Long, black pants with an assortment of pockets and pouches to hold my equipment covered a set of metal shin guards and olive green, steel-lined shinobi boots. I sported a long sleeve, black undershirt with a high collar, sleeveless jacket matching my boots on top. The only splash of colour was the clan insignia that sat on my upper arms and my back, one for each of the clans of my teammates.

A purple swirl on my right arm, for Naruto and the Uzumaki. A red and white fan on my left for Sasuke and the Uchiha. And finally the overlapping diamonds of the Hakate clan shone white on the centre of my back.

In a very real way, they were better armour than the steel plating on my arms would ever provide, at least with certain parties.

Taking a breath, I swept a hand through my pink hair, cut haphazardly short with a kunai the night before. It wasn't particularly neat but would do the job until I could get a proper haircut. As long as I didn't look too much like a girl, I could manage.

Looking towards my bedroom door, I debated saying goodbye to Sakura's parents before shaking my head and turning towards the window. They were strangers to me, the parents to a girl who no longer existed and whom I could never be. It felt wrong to trick them and play happy families after what I'd stolen.

Pushing those intrusive thoughts down, I leapt onto the window ledge and out onto the roof of the adjacent building, beginning my trip towards the Academy Building.


Sauke and Naruto were already there when I arrived, waiting outside the gates of the Academy.

"Hey guys." I greeted with a grin.

Naruto, as consistent as ever, gave a megawatt smile as he turned towards me. Even Sasuke gave his rare "nice smirk" as I neared the pair, showing how excited he must be for the Exam.

"Mornin' Rōzu!" Naru cheered.

"Didn't chicken out then, huh, Isōrō?" Sasuke teased.

"Wow, you lasted a whole three seconds today." I traded back with a grin. "You're not gonna impress any pale eyed girls being such a quick-shot, y'know." That gets a roll of the eyes from the dark haired boy and a snicker from Naru.

"We're just friends." Sasuke dismissed with a grunt.

"Yeah, sure, and Naru's pet rock is going to be the Eighth Hokage."

Naru let's out a groan at that. "His name's Konohamaru and he's the old man's grandson."

"Are you telling me the Third had sex with a rock?" I fired back in mock bewilderment. "That couldn't have been pleasant."

"Maa~ Don't you think it's too early to be riling up Naruto, Rōzu-kun." The voice of Kakashi rang out from the other side of the Academy gate, causing us all to turn.

"It's never too early for that, Kakashi-sensei." My cheeky answer got a signature eye-smile from the mono-sighted Jonin as we moved closer.

"Can't argue with that." He said with a nod, his tone fond as he cast his gaze upon all of us. Placing his hands on the outer shoulders of Naruto and Sasuke, he gave a proud hum. "I just want to say that I'm proud of you three. You've all grown a whole lot since we became a team and I couldn't be happier with your progress. Even if you weren't guaranteed a promotion, I've little doubt you'd make Chunin regardless."

Damn, you had to give it to the man, he could really hit you in the gut when he wanted to. Tears quickly pricked my eyes at his words, a similar reaction coming from my blonde teammate who gave a small sniffle. Even Sasuke looked like he was only dry eyed from sheer force of will to maintain his image. If I didn't already know him, I might have bought it. But to me he may as well have been bawling his eyes out.

"Thanks sensei." I was finally able to get out, rubbing my eyes on my sleeve. "We couldn't have done it without you. Hell, you're even beginning to lose weight."

My joke seems to break the heavy air as we all share a small laugh. "High praise, pinky." He trades back warmly, causing a grin to spread across my face.

"Team Ohana hug?" Naruto suggests, gaining more chuckles before we all squeeze in for a four way hug.

These three… God do I love them with all my heart.

"Now, you three need to get going or you'll be late." Kakashi finally says as we draw back. "And this is one of those times where I'm telling you that you shouldn't be late."

"Must be serious." Sasuke snarks.

"Deadly." Kakashi lilts with an eye-smile. "Now go on, go kick some ass."

"Yes, Kakashi-sensei." We all chorused in unison as he disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

Taking one last look at eachother, we began our walk towards the exam proper.


It's amazing how unobservant some ninja could be, considering being so could very likely equal death in the profession. The last thing you wanted to be as a shinobi was unable to see through a trick.

So the fact that there were so many people trying to enter the supposed exam room was kind of worrying, horrifying when you really thought about it. For one, it was on the wrong floor, this being the ground floor when the exam room was stated to be on the third. For another, while it's sign had been changed to mimick to true exam rooms sign, the Chunin guarding the door had not changed the signs of the other rooms in the hallway.

Thirdly, if any of them actually paid attention, they'd notice that the room could only be the size of a janitors closet. Well, unless the Leaf Village had cracked TARDIS technology, at least.

"S-Should we tell them?" Naruto asks as we stare. "It's kinda sad."

"Pathetic, more like." Sasuke grunts and Naruto nods sheepishly in agreement.

Letting out a sigh, I shook my head. "If they fail to catch this then I'd rather not have their deaths on my conscience. Chances are they'd trip and break their necks on the stairs if we told them anyway."

Deciding to walk past, my eyes briefly met one the Chunin guards, who gave a subtle, exasperated look in return.

I think we were both disappointed at how many Konoha genin were falling for the trick.


We ran into Team Gai just before we made it to the exam room, the trio discussing something or other when we entered the large room that led to the final staircase. All three of them looked in our direction as we neared and I was suddenly hit with a looming sense of dread that I couldn't quite place. Was I forgetting something?

Yes, oh dear god, yes I was.

What I had somehow forgotten was Rock-fucking-Lee. Or, more aptly, Rock Lee's crush on a certain pink haired kunoichi whom I was now piloting.

Now, you could maybe assume that my rather stark change from my Canon counterpart would change Lee's feelings. Well, you know what they say about assuming.

Yep, love knows no gender and Rock Lee has a thing for people with pink hair.

"Hello! I am Rock Lee!" He greets, having nearly teleported right up to my face. "Would you go on a date with me!?"

Okay, forward wasn't even the word. I'm all for confidence and putting your best foot forward but damn, even Naruto was never this bad with his crush.

Glancing past the… very green Genin, I peered towards his teammates for some sort of help. The fact that Tenten had her head in her hands and Neji looked paler than what was normal for a Hyuuga did not fill me with confidence of their intervention. Even my own teammates seemed to be perma-stunned by the brazen request.

Taking a step back, if only to allow myself to breath again, I quickly had to debate how I should go about this. Obviously, I had no interest in a date with him, regardless of how cool he could be in the right circumstance. I was already extra, being with someone like Lee would drive me nuts.

Maybe I should put him down nicely…

Wait, when have I ever claimed to be nice?

"Ah, I'm sorry, Lee-san." I finally responded in the most diplomatic tone I could muster. "But my heart already belongs to someone else."

That does the trick pretty quickly as he visibly deflates, only to suddenly turn towards Sasuke with a fire in his eyes. "Sasuke Uchiha! I challenge you for the lovely Rōzu's hand!"

It's Sasuke's turn to look horrified now. As for me, I make a show of retching at the prospect, quite loudly.

"Oh god no!" I denied between dry heaves, deliberately ignoring the sudden look of offence of my dark haired teammates face. At least Naruto gets a laugh out of it, the resident sunshine child holding his sides with laughter before he gets a punch in the arm from his rival. "Never in a million years would I date Broody."

"Fuck you too, Isōrō." Sasuke growls, much to my amusement.

Lee turns back towards me, fire roaring in his eyes. Not metaphorical fire, legit fire. How he's able to do that is a mystery to me!

"Then you must tell me, who has captured your heart? I will defeat them."

Hook.

"I don't know, they're kinda strong, Lee."

"No one can overcome the Flames of my Youth!" I can hear the capital on the word 'youth'.

Still, there goes the Line.

"Okay… if you're sure…" I trail off, letting the antici- potion build before I finally deliver the final blow. "The one who owns my heart is… Maito Gai."

And Sinker!

Lee hits the deck like a metric ton of bricks have landed on his head, eyes comically wide as he stares up at me in abject horror. His teammates on the other hand have went from dying on the inside to dying from suppressed laughter. Honestly, as far as pranks go it's kind of genius, if I do say so myself. Cruel, sure, but genius.

The only thing that could make it better was for the Jonin himself to make an appearance.


Which Gai did about five seconds later, appearing in a swirl of leaves, standing atop a giant tortoise. Yes, victory for Rōzu!

But then, when the smoke cleared and I was finally able to look upon that legendary character, I was met by a surprising development.

Maito Gai… was maybe one of the most attractive men I'd ever laid eyes on. A very real blush crossed my cheeks as I took in his toned physique, the tight green spandex he donned leaving very little to the imagination. That was before you got to his face, which wouldn't have looked out of place if it was chiselled into marble. Hell, the man somehow made a bowl-cut work for him.

I barely registered that I'd sidestepped Lee and closed the distance, pulling out my notebook and a pen as I went. "E-Excuse me, Gai-senpai." I stuttered out.

Blinking, the tall adonis looked down at me and gave a wide grin that had my knees shaking. "Ah, you must be my eternal rival's student, Rōzu!"

He knew my name! Oh today was grand!

"What can I do to inflame the fires of your Youth, Young Rōzu!?"

"C-Can I have your autograph!" I squeaked.


"So… You want to explain… All that?" Sasuke asks as we leave Team Gai to discuss… whatever it was they needed to talk about.

"Hmm… Nope." I replied, clutching my notebook a little harder.

"Not even-"

"Nope!"

"But you think he's-"

"Yep!"

"I'm telling Kakashi."

"Good, he could learn a thing or two from Gai-sama." I responded with a nod. Seriously, Kakashi was seriously letting the side down. I had obviously given him too much credit for his weight loss.


Sliding the door to the exam room open, we were greeted by the gazes of every occupant in the room, a mixture from curious to pissed off. Quirking an eyebrow, I delivered a one finger salute in response, which puts most in the second camp before they look away. Yeah, keep your eyes to yourselves, bunch of nonames.

Right on cue, Sasuke has to dodge of pale blonde missile as Ino screams his name, falling flat on her face for her troubles.

"Classy." I snark as I look down, rolling my eyes at the venomous glare she gives me.

"Only when Uchiha's around." The dry tone of a certain lazy genius sounds off as he appears through the crowd. "So you three got shoved into this thing too. Troublesome."

"Yep, though I imagine Ino had a hand in dragging you into this more than anything." I replied with a huff of amusement as Shikamaru let's out a put upon sigh as the third member of the team appears. "Hey Choji, how's my favourite Akamichi doing?"

The large genin gave a shy smile at the compliment. "Thanks, Sak- Sorry, I mean Rōzu." Choji quickly amends before I wave him off. If there's anyone in this world who I wouldn't say a bad word against, it was him. He was just too pure to be malicious.

"Sasuke-kun~ I've fallen and I can't get up." Ino whines towards my Broody teammate, reaching towards him in an obviously fake display.

"Good, stay there and away from me." Sasuke grunted, switching sides with Naruto to avoid the fangirl's advances.

Naruto actually offers his hand to help her but she just acts like he isn't even there. Credit to my favourite blonde that he doesn't take it to heart, just shaking his head in exasperation.

"Maaaan, they'll let just about anyone into this thing." And there's Kiba and Team 8, completing the Rookie 9. "I'm surprised you passed the genin test, Dobe." He fires at Naruto in a pretty lazy attempt at riling him up.

Naruto just ignores the shaggy haired boy and instead addresses the dog standing beside him. "Hey Akamaru, still hanging out with this bum?" He questions the small, white and very adorable dog, ignoring the squawk from his partner.

Akamaru gives a small yip that seems like an affirmative. "Bad luck, I keep telling you that you should get him fixed." The dog gives another bark, almost seeming amused. "Nothing to remove, you say?"

There's a feeling of pride in my chest as I watch Naru completely dismantle Kiba using his own dog. Spending so much time around myself and Sasuke's sarcastic banter was beginning to pay dividends in his ability to eviscerate people with words alone. From the fact that Kiba is currently fighting off the hold of his glasses clad teammate trying to fight Naru, I'd say he was doing well.

"You should stop making a scene, Kiba. Why? Because you are evidently not on Naruto's level." Shino states neutrally, even as it deflates Kiba with how cutting it is.

Turning my attention towards Sasuke again, I'm a little surprised to find he's begun a conversation with Hinata in the interim. Once again, I'm surprised at how… natural the two seem to be able to talk. Sasuke is using full sentences and everything! And is he smiling? Seriously, just how much have I changed here?

At this point I don't think my heart can take many more surprises for the moment. Between Lee's proposition, Gai's attractiveness, Naruto's banter and Sasuke's people skills, I think my tank is running pretty damn full.

So of course it's then that I hear a familiar tinkling sound behind me and a thin piece of metal gently poking the skin of my neck. "You should really watch your six more, Rōzu-kun." The amused tone of a certain ice user trickles into my ear as a large smile spreads across my face.

"Why would I when I've got a pretty Mist ninja watching it for me?" I reply with an innocent tone, gaining a laugh from my 'assailant' before they withdraw the sendon needle, allowing me to turn.

"I can't deny it's a good view." Haku hums, smiling serenely as he tilts his head and closes his eyes. His forehead now sporting a shiny, new Mist headband that helps his hair frame his face.

"Hello again, Haku-kun." I finally greet before pulling him into a hug, happy to see him alive and well again.

Hopefully the happiness would get me through what was to come.


AN: Rōzu: Huh, I wonder what Gai looks like for real?

Rōzu: OH NO HE'S HOT!

You can't tell me that Gai isn't the most sought after shinobi in the village, have you seen his jawline!? Only question is if he accepts these offers or not. Does Maito Gai fuck!? I need to know, dammit! Personally I imagine he's all about that free love, for everyone who asks!

Just… so handsome!

But moving on from my sudden onset Gai thirst, how did you like this chapter. Am I evil for doing that to Lee? I feel kinda evil. Not repentant about it though haha! Also, more Haku! Because we love Haku here!

Any comments/kudos/reviews are greatly appreciated!

MurderousLord!