Bechloe-bible-49: Thank you.
96itadakimasu96: My life is a horror novel. I'd rather it be bland.
FromTumblr: Thank you.
Pixie1913: Thank you.
Guest: I've only seen Scott Pilgrim, but I barely even remember that movie.
SunDanceQT: Thank you.
Jo: I haven't done a full flashback scene of it, but it was mentioned that they've had sex in the past.
Dysrhythmia
It's the hand that lifts you up,
No matter where you roam.
It's the words that wish you luck;
It's the light that leads you home.
And it makes you say, it makes you say:
This is what love looks like.
- Rebecca Roubion
"Do you feel any better, Baby?"
Aubrey stops in the middle of the room.
"Can you try to eat something?"
Aubrey's entire body is telling her to curl up into a fetal position in the middle of the cold, hard floor, and never move again – and the only reason she isn't is because the floor is dirty and that would be really pathetic. So, no, she's not really feeling that much better – not after fighting with Beca, again, and now trying to recover from…personal activities. Her body is tired, and it's not hungry.
"Do you want to lay down?"
Aubrey hears the water and the fan turn off, then glances over as Beca opens the door.
Beca casually walks over to her cot and practically falls down on top of it.
"Aubrey, come lay down, please."
"I forgot to brush my teeth." Aubrey turns and walks back inside.
xxxxx
"Maybe you have Lupus," Beca says when Aubrey reemerges from the bathroom.
Unfortunately, there is only so long a person can brush their teeth for. Aubrey looks at the House marathon that's playing on the TV again. "I'm not sick."
"But you're still in the hospital, and House would recommend you be tested for Lupus."
"I doubt it. It's never Lupus," Julia says.
"One time, it was Lupus, but I don't have Lupus."
"You should still be tested."
"I've seen this show enough that I could diagnose myself if I had Lupus, Beca."
"How, when you said only one person has ever had it?"
Aubrey's lips twitch.
"Aubrey, come drink some water and lay down, please."
Aubrey sulks to the bed, and sits down uncomfortably on the edge of it.
"Why are you pouting, Honey-Bunny?"
"I'm not pouting." Aubrey picks up the glass of water Julia put on the table. She has to drink water, or she's not going to be able to go home. She sips on it slowly at first, drinking a little more of it at a time when she realizes it doesn't feel that bad. She can't drink all of it though. There's still about half left when she places the cup back down on the table.
"Thank you. Now, lay down, please."
Aubrey moves the table out of her way, then lays down as far away from her as possible – which is still touching her, because it's a small bed. She picks up her doll and places it on her lap, bending her legs so it doesn't fall backward.
"Do you have anything you want to watch?" Julia asks.
Aside from the news, no. Aubrey shakes her head, and fiddles with the doll's dress.
"Do you want us to put the subtitles on, so you can try to sleep?"
Aubrey shakes her head again.
"Okay. Try to drink some more water when you can; it will make you feel better in the long run."
Aubrey just bumps the back of her doll's head repeatedly against her legs for something to focus on – something that isn't death, or Chloe, or sex with Beca, something that doesn't require in-depth processing.
"So, have you and your husband seen every episode of this show?" Beca asks.
"Several times," Julia answers, "It's his favorite – if you don't count anything on Animal Planet. He likes to refer to himself as the black Steve Irwin, because he thinks he's an alligator wrangler. One day, he's going to lose an arm."
"He…tries to wrestle the alligators?"
"The small ones," Julia answers, "I love when I can just send Aubrey out fishing with him, so I know he's staying out of trouble."
Aubrey sinks deep down into the bed.
"Have you seen an alligator?" Beca asks Aubrey.
Aubrey shakes her head.
"Really?" Julia asks, "You've never even seen one?"
Aubrey freezes; Julia knows. "Maybe from a distance…"
"Which is it?" Julia asks with an airy tone of curiosity, "You've never seen one, or you've seen one from a distance?"
"It was a long time ago," Aubrey answers, "I don't remember."
"I think I would remember if I saw an alligator in the wild," Beca says.
"Mmm," Julia hums, suspicious now, "That's interesting, because I specifically remember the two of you went out on the boat, and when you came back, there was a brand new alligator print. What could have made that, besides an alligator? Because I know Noah is definitely not an artist."
Aubrey shifts around. "A stencil."
"You put an alligator on a boat with you?" Beca asks.
"So, what you're telling me," Julia confirms, "is that my husband has dozens of different sized alligator print stencils hidden in a secret compartment on the boat?"
That is what Aubrey is telling her; whether or not it's true, however… She traces her doll's facial features, not answering.
"Mhm," Julia responds to her silence, "I see. So, did he build this compartment himself, or was it there when my dad owned the boat, and he just never bothered to tell me about it?"
Aubrey decides that if she refuses to acknowledge she's being asked questions, eventually her mom will get bored with the topic.
"Maybe I should text him and ask him about it," Julia suggests and picks up her phone. A few seconds later, she breathes a laugh. "He says if he told me about it, it would no longer be a secret. Oh, you two are good." She pauses as her phone goes off before she answers it. "Yes, my love?"
Good. Now Aubrey doesn't have to worry about it – Julia's husband does.
"It's for you," Julia says, and offers her the phone.
Well, fuck. Aubrey shakes her head.
"You thought he was mad at you and didn't want to talk to you, but now you don't want to talk to him?"
Aubrey takes the phone. "Aubrey speaking."
"Good job clearing up any confusion about who's on the phone," Beca comments.
"She's onto us, Champ," Noah says, "She's too smart for our own good."
"I know," Aubrey answers.
"What's our story?" Noah asks.
"I don't know. You know she's sitting right next to me, right?"
"We should speak in code."
Code? "We don't have a code."
Julia smiles and shakes her head.
"Say something random to throw her off," Noah says.
"Like what?"
"What's your favorite color?"
"Blue…"
"What's your favorite flower?"
Aubrey blinks. "Um…" She can't say daisies, not anymore. "Lilacs."
"That's the code. Blue lilacs."
"I don't understand how that helps us," Aubrey says. She's trying to stay engaged; she really is. She's just exhausted.
"If you say it out of nowhere, it'll confuse her and send us off our trail," Noah says.
The only person confused right now is Aubrey. "Dad, I don't think it will."
"You're right; she's very smart."
Aubrey glances over at Julia, who casually just arches one eyebrow at her – like she knows everything that's being said. "Say something," Aubrey says, then holds the phone away from her ear.
"Something."
Aubrey can hear him from several inches away, which means that her mom can, in fact, hear the entire conversation.
"Give me my phone."
Aubrey hands it over, then sinks even deeper into the bed.
"You're both lucky you're cute," Julia mumbles at them, then presses her phone to her ear.
Aubrey feels a bit less awkward, and a bit more distracted now. Sort of. She resumes staring at her doll, as the two of them chat. They don't talk about much. They realize they're both watching the House marathon, then spend a few minutes checking in on each other and making sure the other is okay, before they both say they love each other then hang up. Listening to them talk to each other has the calming effect of white noise – there isn't anything to hear, but it still helps mask all the unwanted background noise in Aubrey's head.
"Do you ever fight?" Aubrey asks once the phone is put away. She finds it hard to believe they could ever fight.
"Sure," Julia answers, "We argue. Why?"
Because Aubrey wants to understand how they work. Because Aubrey wants to understand how she works; how she can just be so equable all the time. She gives her her one shoulder shrug.
"We don't yell or purposely say cruel things to hurt each other, if that's what you're asking," Julia says, "We've said some accidental cruel things to each other, and then apologized for it."
"So, you've never yelled at each other?" Beca asks with doubt.
Julia shakes her head.
"Are you those people who yell, but refer to it as 'talking loudly'?" Beca replies.
"I talk as loud as I need to to be heard, but that's mostly at work, because things around me can get loud," Julia answers, "I've talked loudly to my kids several times, because they are loud and have selective hearing, but I don't yell, and neither does my husband."
Beca falls quiet.
"Are you looking for my kryptonite?" Julia asks lightly.
"Does your house have a white picket fence?" Beca replies.
Julia laughs. "No. No, it does not."
"I'm not saying you sound perfect," Beca says, "But…"
"We sound healthy?" Julia supplies.
"You sound like next door neighbors in a TV sitcom," Beca answers, "Like the ones who have their lives together, and smile and wave to everyone who doesn't, while you're outside grilling hamburgers."
Julia laughs even harder. "I do love a good ol' Beale barbecue."
"Dad does grill good hamburgers," Aubrey chimes in.
"He does, doesn't he?" Julia agrees, and moves to cover them both up.
The memories are comforting – images of the four of them lounging around in the yard and on the front porch with hamburgers and corn on the cob straight off the grill. She always loves when they're there for the 4th of July BBQ. Chloe's dad buys giant packs of mini fireworks that he sets off, while the rest of them watch from a safe distance, because his luck with fireworks is poor. One year, he accidentally set his pack of matches on fire. A different year, he made the mistake of putting all the fireworks he thought were duds in the burning barrel; sparks started flying everywhere and it both looked and sounded like the perfect grand finale. Julia was not very impressed, because it came very close to catching their backyard on fire, but the rest of them were. That's probably the closest she's ever seen her mom to being panicked – standing by the back door, eyes wide, both hands covering her mouth. They all felt guilty when she went to bed very early that night.
They fall back into silence, watching the TV.
xxxxx
Aubrey wishes they could keep the television on all night long – not just the light, but the sound as well. Or that they could all just stay awake. "I want to watch the next episode," she claims as Julia turns off the TV once the current one ends.
"You can watch it on my laptop tomorrow," Julia says, "It's getting late."
Aubrey reacts immediately as Julia stands; she scrambles upright before she even has a chance to process what's happening, and watches her walk toward the door. "Where are you going?"
"I'm just turning out the light." Julia flips the switch, then finds her way back to the bed in the dark, "Lay back down."
No.
"Here." Julia fixes the blanket after she sits back down. "Come on." She wraps an arm around her, coaxing her back.
It's too dark. There is no way of knowing if anyone is in the room with them or not. Of course, they'd have to open the door to walk in, but what if they sleep through that? Then if she even does wake up, one of them could be dead, just like when she woke up and saw Lilly – or that could even be happening to Chloe right now.
She tries to sit back up, but Julia has her arms around her, and she's trapped.
"Take a deep breath."
Aubrey sucks a deep breath in through her nose, then slowly exhales through her mouth. She needs to go check on Chloe. She needs to go lay down with Chloe, even if it's on that tiny little cot beside the bed.
"Take another one."
Breathing does very little to ease the heaviness that slowly starts weighing down on her chest. She tries to think of more good times with Chloe, but her memories are a poor substitute for the reality of having Chloe here with her. They do nothing more than make Aubrey want to run to her room and curl up beside her.
"Keep taking breaths."
The fear starts to dissipate with each exhale, but the heartache does not. Every inhale weighs harder on her lungs, like she's pulling grief into them instead of oxygen. She shakes her head like she can deny it away. Deep breaths, Aubrey, just breathe. She can't just breathe away Chloe being unconscious.
"Do you want me to talk until you fall asleep?" Julia whispers.
Aubrey covers her face with her hand and nods.
xxxxx
It's dark in the room when Aubrey wakes up. She tries to go back to sleep, really, she does. The moment she starts moving around, Julia wakes up too, and the two of them get comfortable again. She closes her eyes, and relaxes into the new position, but sleep never comes. So, she tries to just rest quietly. But then she remembers where she is – and she starts thinking about how she got here, and sleep or being still is no longer an option. If she wants to keep the remainder of her sanity, she has to get up.
Aubrey carefully inches out from under one of Julia's arms and stands up – looking around as her eyes still try to adjust. She locates Beca's cot, and tiptoes that way – until something hard and sharp stabs her in the foot. A few choice words get bitten back as she hops a few times on the other foot, waiting for the pain to subside. Fucking dinosaur. If her body hasn't been through enough already, she can now add being impaled by the head of whatever dinosaur just accosted her. Fuck.
She walks more carefully, dragging her feet, until the front of her legs hit Beca's bed. "Beca," she whispers, and sits down on the edge of it, rubbing her foot. "Beca."
Beca shifts a little.
Aubrey massages the offending area for a few more seconds, before turning to shake Beca awake. "Beca."
"I heard you the first two times," Beca mumbles, "The line, Aubrey."
"I can't see the line."
"The dinosaurs."
"I can't see those either; it's dark." Aubrey can only feel them.
"But you know you've crossed them, because you're on my bed."
Aubrey sits quietly for a second, waiting to see if she'll get up. "It's morning," she lets her know when she doesn't move.
Beca laughs into her pillow, but she doesn't sound happy.
"I'm hungry."
"Because you chose not to eat dinner."
"No. I'm hungry, because it's time for breakfast."
Beca lifts her head, only to switch her pillow from underneath it to overtop of it.
Aubrey faces forward and stares into the darkness, before she turns again and snatches the pillow.
Beca groggily sits up, eyes still closed, hair a mess.
Yes.
Not saying another word, Beca grabs her clothes and storms off to the bathroom.
Aubrey springs up to get dressed too.
xxxxx
…hospital bagels have no flavor, and neither does the cream cheese they have to go with them.
Beca slouches down on the same bench Aubrey sat on with Julia the previous day, and takes a large bite out of hers plain.
"What are you doing?" Aubrey asks.
It takes Beca awhile to chew, and eventually, she just gives up and talks with her mouth half full. "I'm wondering why you have a friend who can cook, and I'm eating cardboard. I thought that was the reason you were waking me up."
"I got up to walk," Aubrey informs her. Sure, she woke up hungry, that wasn't a lie, but she's not ravenous like she was the day before.
"You can't leave the hospital, Aubrey."
"I meant around the building."
"Why?"
Because it's not like Aubrey can run around it. Aubrey just looks at her.
"What?"
Chloe would already know why they're outside. They probably, actually wouldn't even be outside, because Chloe would have found a way to confine her to that hospital bed. "I want to go walking."
"First of all, no, because I'm not going walking at 6:30 in the morning – or ever."
"It's 7:00, and you had to walk to get here."
"And second of all, no, because the same thing is going to happen that happened yesterday where you were awake and fine in the morning, and then by the afternoon, you were ready to crash."
Aubrey frowns.
"Sit down and eat your cardboard."
"I'm allowed to walk around. I can't just do nothing." Aubrey takes a reluctant bite out of her bagel.
"Newsflash, Yūsuke Suzuki: you don't have a choice." Beca slouches down farther. "I'm not moving."
xxxxx
"I thought I would find you out here." Julia approaches awhile later, cup of coffee in hand.
"Psychic."
"The power of reasoning," Julia controverts Beca's theory, "Aubrey wasn't with Chloe nor had she texted her friends from my phone, and this is where we sat yesterday."
"Okay, well, I'm the one who chose to sit here, so explain that."
"There's only three benches, Beca," Julia says, "And I can see them all from here."
Aubrey is still standing, bagel in hand. She took a few more bites out of it, but now it's just hanging down by her side.
"Why are you looking so angry?" Julia asks.
"Because she wants to go jogging," Beca is all to eager to answer for her.
"Aubrey…"
Please, Aubrey wouldn't be able to jog if she tried. Even she knows that. Her body still feels like a tractor trailer hit it. It just doesn't feel like said truck is reversing back over her at the moment. "I said I wanted to walk."
"Well, why don't you walk back to your room so your nurse can complete her morning rounds," Julia suggests, "Then walk with me to Chlo's room. Dad is asking for a break."
Aubrey can't argue about going to Chloe's room. She looks at Beca.
"I'm going back to sleep," Beca refuses to join her in going to Chloe's room, "For real this time."
Right, because yesterday, Aubrey's brother interrupted that. Somehow, it's only been twenty four hours since he was here. It feels like it's been a week.
Beca stands up, ready to go back to Aubrey's room without question.
Aubrey would rather just go straight to Chloe's.
xxxxx
The nurse decides that now is a good time to show Julia how to change the bandage on Aubrey's shoulder, so it doesn't get infected after leaving the hospital. Now is not a good time. The best time for this to happen is never. Why couldn't she have gotten shot somewhere she could change her own bandage? Except not in the leg, because she would be very unhappy to be stuck in a wheelchair or on crutches. And not in the stomach or chest, because that would be even more painful and disgusting. Honestly, he did shoot her in what is probably the easiest place to cope with – aside from, you know, in the head.
Her vitals are still low.
Her temperature, which usually rests on a perfect 98.6 degrees, is 97.7.
And Aubrey is sick of people poking at her arm, applying various degrees of pressure – because nothing has changed.
She takes all the medication offered to her – for pain, nausea, and the two little pills that are somehow supposed to help her recover from this.
She even eats the rest of the cream cheese smothered cardboard bagel.
There is no good sense in arguing anymore.
She's ready to go home and get back at her routine.
xxxxx
Aubrey tries not to think about how Chloe would react to the knowledge that she had sex with Beca in the shower last night when she enters her room. She sits down on a chair while Julia steps out to talk to Noah, and just stares at her, while still keeping an eye on her mom through the partially cracked door. She doesn't feel guilty about sex with Beca. She's tempted to even do it again, just for the temporary relief. That's the part that hurts though – that she doesn't feel guilty at all. She doesn't need to. If Chloe knew, she'd be perfectly okay with it – except for maybe upset that Aubrey would never be okay with her having sex with Beca, at least not without Aubrey there too.
xxxxx
"I'm going to the store. Do you want anything, Champ?"
Aubrey shakes her head.
"He's also going to go to a laundry mat and wash your clothes. Are you sure you don't want anything?"
"Do you know where Chloe's sweatshirt is?" Aubrey asks, "The Yankees one?" Maybe he can wash that too.
Julia doesn't answer her for a moment. "It was destroyed," she finally says, "It's probably in evidence."
"It wasn't destroyed."
"Honey, it was. It was a mess."
But it still smelled like Chloe – or maybe it didn't. Maybe Aubrey just needed something to get her through. She doesn't even have anything that belongs to her right now, aside from her ring. "I'm fine," she assures Chloe's dad. When she gets home, she can go through Chloe's closet. What a change – her stealing Chloe's clothes, instead of the other way around.
"Can you get me something better tasting than hotel coffee?" Julia asks.
"I think you've had enough coffee," Noah replies.
"I don't think you get to decide that for me."
Aubrey tenses, despite the conversation they had last night.
"I'll get you…fancy tea," Noah says, then pecks her lips. He backs up before he mentions, "Without caffeine."
"Hey!" Julia calls after him, "Please, put a lot of sugar in it!" She folds her arms and slouches against the doorframe with a lopsided frown.
That didn't go at all how Aubrey expected it to go. She can see it on Julia's face – she's not angry at him, she misses him. "You should go with him." If she does leave the hospital, Aubrey is no doubt going to vomit, but she's starting to get used to it. (No, she isnt. It's humiliating, and it hurts, and she never wants to throw up again.)
"He's already in the elevator." Julia walks in with a soft smile that looks sadder than Aubrey ever thought a smile could look. "Do you want to lay down on the cot and go back to sleep for awhile?"
"No." Aubrey shakes her head. "But maybe you should."
Her smile at least takes an undertone of amusement, and she rolls her eyes in good nature. "I'm okay, Sweetheart, thank you. I'm just a general sort of tired."
So is Aubrey. But she's not sure caffeine will change that.
Julia sinks down in the chair next to her, and steals half of her blanket.
"Do you think Chloe would lie to me?" Aubrey asks.
"I don't know," Julia answers, "I guess depends what it is she might be lying about."
"She said she fell, hit her head," Aubrey says, "But there was a lot of blood, and she hasn't woken up."
"Why do you think she would lie to you about what happened?"
"Because I was already scared."
"You think she was trying to protect you?"
Aubrey nods.
"That sounds a lot like something Chloe would do, but I couldn't tell you for sure, because I wasn't there. I'm sorry, Aubrey."
"She asked me to marry her." This isn't how she wants to tell anyone about their engagement. But Aubrey is starting to doubt the validity of it. They were under a lot of stress; saying goodbye to each other, because they thought they were going to die.
"I'm glad she got the chance to finally do it," Julia says, "She's been wanting to for years. Do you want to marry her?"
Aubrey looks down at her ring, and nods. "More than anything."
"We don't know that this is permanent," Julia says, watching her, "The doctors don't know. They've said it's a waiting game."
Aubrey will wait forever, if she has to. Because there is no way that she could ever, ever move on. Chloe is it; she's the one – the only one. There may be other people, like Beca, that Chloe is able to fall in love with – but, for Aubrey, there will never be anybody else.
"I'm so sorry this happened – is happening, Aubrey," Julia tells her again, "You deserve a lifetime of happiness."
Unless whatever pills they're giving Aubrey can work a miracle on her and Chloe, happy is one thing Aubrey is never going to feel again.
xxxxx
It's a few hours until Noah comes back.
Aubrey mostly just stares into the void, while Julia drifts in and out of sleep. Aubrey might have fallen asleep a few times herself, but she isn't really sure. She's in a nightmare either way.
Julia groggily lifts her head as the door opens, and Noah walks in with a cup holder carrying three Starbucks cups. "How was the laundry mat?"
"I couldn't figure out how to work the washer; fortunately some lady was willing to show me. It was a clothes call though."
Julia rolls her eyes, and Aubrey's inability to smile in this room hides her amusement.
Noah places the cup holder on the table, then hands them both a cup.
"Did you remember Beca?" Julia asks.
"Already delivered hers," Noah says, and picks up his own cup.
Aubrey takes a sip of her tea. It's alright. The warmth of it is nice. The taste of it is pretty heavily diluted by milk and sugar. She drinks it to be polite.
Julia takes one sip of hers, makes a bitter face, then just balances the cup in her lap and stares hard at her husband – who ignores the look.
"I thought I would walk Aubrey back to her room," Noah says, "And give you a few minutes alone with Chloe."
Aubrey doesn't feel like drinking tea anymore.
"Are you going to be okay?" Julia asks her.
No. Aubrey nods.
"I'll be there in a few minutes," Julia assures her with a kiss to the side of her head, "I'm sure Beca is in the room."
"I'm fine." Aubrey stands up.
"Alright. Here." Julia gets up too, and drapes the blanket over Aubrey's arm. She places her cup down on the seat of the chair, then wraps Aubrey up in a hug. "Go rest on your bed. Keep my husband out of trouble."
Aubrey nods against her shoulder.
"Are you going to let her go?" Noah asks.
"Maybe," Julia replies without releasing her.
Aubrey is content to wait – to not have to move, or let her mom or Chloe out of her sight. It's nice that her mom is about four inches taller than her, and she's able to just rest her head against her shoulder without putting in effort. It's not like Aubrey is that tall, she's only 5'5", but with Chloe being like an inch shorter than her and Beca only rising about two feet from the ground, she's used to bending over to people in some way, shape, or form.
Julia eases back when Aubrey doesn't, and kisses her forehead. "I'll be there in a minute," she tells her again.
"Okay." Aubrey tries to appear unbothered, reminding herself that Julia needs private time with Chloe too – and probably just in general. She turns and follows Noah to the door – and he makes sure it's shut tight behind them.
"Is she smothering you?" Noah asks, as they walk toward the elevator.
Aubrey shakes her head. "No." She wants to say yes, not because she is feeling smothered, but because she's finding herself craving the affection, and that's not acceptable – but, if she says yes, he might tell her, and then she'll stop, and also Aubrey would feel really bad, because Julia is doing a lot for her.
"Good. She really loves you, you know?"
Yeah, Aubrey is starting to see that. She follows him onto the elevator. "Why is she drinking so much coffee?" She doesn't remember her drinking that much coffee all the times they've visited each other; and she knows she's sleeping, because they're both sleeping in the same bed.
"I think she has an ongoing headache from all of this that she's trying to caffeinate away."
Oh. "Why hasn't she taken anything?" They're in the hospital; Aubrey is sure there are plenty of medications available.
"She probably has." Noah steps off the elevator.
Makes sense. Aubrey keeps downing antiemetics. They don't help for more than a short period of time. She walks to her room. "Thank you," she says, expecting him to leave her at the door.
"I know you'd rather be with Mom than your old man right now," Noah says, and Aubrey starts to feel a little guilty, "And that makes sense; Mom is a lot warmer, and more compassionate, and more comforting…I could make a whole list. But I thought I would steal you from her before I head back to Florida for a few days. She can't hog you all to herself. I got you something."
Aubrey looks at him, confused.
Noah knocks twice for Beca's sake, then pushes open the door.
There is a vase of flowers on the table over her bed – beautiful purple lilacs surrounded by smaller blue flowers. Aubrey steps inside. On the bed itself, covered up like it's sleeping, is a stuffed crocodile about the length of her lower arm. "You didn't have to do this…"
"So, only Mom is allowed to spoil you?"
Aubrey's eyes feel like they're burning, and a knot forms in her chest. People always assume she was spoiled growing up; so much so that Aubrey believes she was too. So, maybe her family wasn't her biggest fan – but they had money, and status. She had a large room and designer clothes, expensive food, a big house. But never this. Never anyone who went out of their way to make her feel cared about. "Thank you," she says again.
Noah squeezes her good shoulder. "I'll go send Mom back to you."
"When you get back to New York," Aubrey stops him before he can leave, "We can go deep sea fishing."
"For sharks. Don't tell Mom."
"I won't." Aubrey watches him walk away, not sure what else to say. She closes the door behind her, then looks at Beca. "Does my room look drab now?"
Beca rolls her eyes.
"He got you flowers too," Aubrey notices out loud. Besides Beca's bed is a vase of daffodils.
Beca just shrugs, even though Aubrey can see her keep looking at them with a fondness in her gaze.
Aubrey walks over to the bed and picks up the crocodile. It's soft, softer than the pillow she's been using. She drops the blanket on the bed next to her, places her cup in the table, then sits down and looks it over. It has a zipper on its stomach that opens to an empty pouch. She's not really sure what it's meant for. To hide things, maybe? She stops fiddling with it, and smirks in Beca's direction.
"What?" Beca asks.
Aubrey can think of one use for it.
xxxxx
"Mrs. Beale."
"My name is Julia, Peanut," Julia says as she walks into the room.
Beca cringes. "Aubrey won't give my dinosaurs back."
"What did she do with your dinosaurs?" Julia asks.
"She stole them."
Aubrey heaves a loud sigh, and absently pokes at the crocodile's stomach, moving the dinosaurs around inside of it. "We were playing."
"No. You walked over here and took them all."
"Dad got me an apex predator. They didn't stand a chance."
"T-rex was also an apex predator during its time, Aubrey. It could have swallowed your modern day crocodile whole."
"And, yet, somehow all of your dinosaurs fit into my modern day crocodile's stomach."
"She also peeled up the tape," Beca complains.
"It ate that too."
"These are beautiful," Julia comments, ignoring their argument to look at Aubrey's flowers, "Looks like Dad tricked you on the phone." She looks at Aubrey's crocodile. "That, I am not the biggest fan of."
Aubrey loves it – especially now that it has Beca's dinosaurs inside of it.
"Are you going to tell her to give them back?" Beca asks.
"Aubrey, give her her things back, please."
"I can't." Aubrey places the crocodile behind her as a pillow. "They're digesting."
"That never stops your stomach," Beca says.
Julia lightly grabs Aubrey by the arm before she can get up. "You wanted her to play with you, Beca. I guess you're going to have to find a way to get them back."
Beca drapes her arm over her face.
"Why don't you get a big T-rex when we get to New York, and eat her crocodile?"
Beca lifts her arm a few centimeters, clearly interested in this idea.
Aubrey frowns at her mom.
Julia shrugs, and sits down on the edge of the bed. "Fair is fair."
Is anything ever really fair though? None of them have seen fair in days. Aubrey subtly moves in closer to her, pretending to just be getting comfortable, and focuses on relishing her prize before Beca can find a way to take her things back. Soon, she's going to have to think about forcing herself to stomach some lunch. It's getting easier to eat now that she manages to be both hungry and nauseated at the same time – rather than just the latter. And each meal brings her closer to going home. Leaving this place is almost starting to feel real. Almost.
She's not sure she's going to be able to focus on some trivial feud with Beca once she's in New York though.
Not when she's going to be so far away from Chloe.
No argument with Beca or doting from Chloe's parents is going to be enough to make her feel better with Chloe unconscious and miles away at the hospital.
Even going home, which is all Aubrey wants to do, comes with a harsh price that is nowhere near fair.
