Pixie1913: Her reasoning will be explained further into the story.
96itadakimasu96: Well, this chapter might make you happier. Sort of.
Daisy: Julia is actually based on Juliet from LOST, with a few major differences.
Dysrhythmia
I've been dying inside,
Little by little.
Nowhere to go,
But goin' out of my mind,
In endless cirlcles.
Runnin' from myself until,
You gave me a reason for standing still.
- Nick Lachey
"She should have killed me."
Aubrey isn't sure if she meant to speak the words out loud or not, but they're out in the open now, and Julia and Beca both turn to look at her.
"Why do you say that?" Julia asks.
"Knock it off," Beca demands, "Chloe would be dead if it wasn't for you; and I don't even know what would have happened to me."
Aubrey's head feels clouded with exhaustion, but she's aware enough to know that that statement holds no reason Nikki shouldn't have killed her. She stares, overly interested, at the corner of the blanket, her head pounding directly behind her eyes. No one can give her a reason she should have survived that has to do with her own survival.
"Dude, you're basically a hero."
Preston comes back with everything she needs, and Aubrey sits up and wipes her face. "You're sure there is nothing else we can do for you right now?"
Julia stares at Aubrey a few seconds longer before she turns to Preston and smiles. "You've done so much today. I think we're okay now. Thank you."
Aubrey swallows the pills and signs all the papers, and realizes for the first time that she's writing '10's as she copies the date. It's no longer even September. It's October 4th. She hands everything back. "Am I free to go?"
"You are," Preston replies, "This paper is for your prescription, and you can leave the hospital gown on the bed. I'll just take the IV out…"
"Thank you," Aubrey says when he's done and waits for him to leave.
"Beca, do you want to step out for a moment so she can change?" Julia asks.
Beca leaves, rubbing her face.
And then they sit there – in silence – for what feels like way too long.
"I know that you know she's trying," Julia finally says as she stands up, "I also know you must be absolutely exhausted." But…? She unties Aubrey's gown in the back and helps slip it off over her cast. But? "And I'm sorry you feel the way that you do right now." She picks up Aubrey's clothes. "Once you're dressed, I'll text your friends. Maybe the medicine they gave you will kick in by the time they get here and you won't have to feel so awful being in the car this time." She gives her a hopeful smile that appears genuine yet drained of energy at the same time.
Aubrey weakly wrestles on her clothes with assistance, trying to keep the pocket containing the phone away from Julia's hands. It works. The phone remains hidden and secure. It might be a cheap piece of shit with a cracked screen already, but at least it's thin and it's light. She's tempted to lay back down as Julia texts her friends, but she knows if she does, she'll never get back up. So she pulls her feet up onto the bed and bends her legs to rest her head against her knees.
"They're on their way."
Aubrey nods.
"Should I be worried about what you said?" Julia asks, "I don't know if you would tell me if I should be, but should I be?"
If Beca can say she wishes she had died in that place, why can't Aubrey? She worked so hard trying to survive, trying to save them all – and for what? Beca would have still survived without her, and everyone else would still be dead. The only person she managed to save was herself. She shakes her head. She should have never even thought it.
Julia sits down next to her and rubs her back some more, and Aubrey waits for her to say something. 'I guess you won't stay up all night anymore, will you?' 'Well, maybe if you were taking care of yourself…' Instead, she's quiet, just gently trailing her fingers up and down Aubrey's spine for a little while until Aubrey starts to relax too much. "Let's go wait outside and get some air. Do you think you can walk?"
Aubrey can barely lift her own head, but she somehow does it anyway. She grabs Brian's jacket and lets Julia fix it over her shoulders then stands up, using the bed for support. The room is still turning in circles and she wobbles on her feet, but Julia wraps an arm around her to keep her steady and guides her into the hall.
"Beca, are you ready?"
Beca pushes herself away from her spot against the wall and stuffs her hands into the front pockets of her jeans.
"I want to say goodnight to Chloe," Aubrey decides.
"We can do that."
xxxxx
Aubrey stares at the chipped fingernail polish on Chloe's nails as she holds her hand. Maybe they'll let Aubrey repaint them for her or at least take it off. She doesn't know why it feels like such a pressing matter, but Chloe can't just lay here with chipped fingernail polish. Sure, maybe she slacks a little more than Aubrey when it comes to keeping them looking perfect, but still. Aubrey misses the days back in college when they would go get them done together and decide that they should match. Alice would have roasted them for chipped nail polish – and she often did call attention to Chloe when her nails weren't up to par, claiming that she didn't know how to do something as simple as take care of herself.
But it's always been Aubrey floundering around in that area.
Aubrey who, up until now, went jogging every morning, ate three healthy meals per day, got eight hours of sleep (when she could), and drove herself to be the epitome of perfection somehow got it wrong. Apparently taking care of oneself was more than just going through the motions of it day in and day out. It was more than just being the one person in the house who knew how to work the God damn waffle maker and could adequately feed them both. She just doesn't know how that is. But, contrary to what Alice always claimed, Chloe took care of herself – for the most part. And she took care of Aubrey too.
Julia knocks on the door. "Aubrey, time to go."
"Goodnight." She's too sick to sing her something. Too tired. Too confused. Too sad. So Aubrey just squeezes Chloe's hand to let her know she was there. "I'll be back soon."
xxxxx
The car ride 'home' isn't as rough as the car ride to the hospital had been. It's just quiet. Aubrey takes her spot in the middle, between Julia and Beca, and stares out the front window as the two of them stare out the sides. It isn't until they're stuck in traffic that Julia breaks the silence.
"So, what did you guys get up to today?"
"Well," Conrad says, "Brian took me to a very nice dinner at Wendy's, and then he hid in the car while I bought weed and poppers from my dealer…"
Poppers.
Beca looks at Aubrey, and Aubrey shoots her back a glare that has her inching closer to the door.
"And then we went for a walk in the park. And then we went home and did poppers."
"You went home and cleaned your VCR?" Beca asks, "Dude, who even owns a VCR these days? Who buys VCR cleaner from a drug dealer?"
Brian emits one loud laugh.
"Oh, honey…" Conrad turns in his seat, and Aubrey can feel her entire face growing redder and redder, "I mean, yes, technically poppers are video head cleaners, but-"
"Can we talk about something else?" Aubrey requests.
"No, I'm really interested in knowing what poppers are," Beca replies. She must know Aubrey is going to make her life a living hell after this.
"So, you inhale them," Conrad explains, "And they give you this kind of head rush and lower your inhibitions. They also increase your libido, prolong erections, and relax the muscles in your vagina and anal sphincter. It's just illegal to buy and sell them as drugs, so they still have to be sold as video head cleaner in the club. They're basically the gay ecstasy."
"Wow," Beca mouths.
Aubrey wishes it wasn't only fighter jets that had emergency eject buttons; it would be nice if cars had them too.
"Anyway, and then I made dinner, and there are leftovers if you want some. And then we walked around the neighborhood. And then we came and got you guys."
"Well, I'm glad you had fun," Julia says.
"There's also leftover weed and poppers," Conrad adds.
"Maybe Aubrey wants to try some," Beca suggests – in the car with Julia, nonetheless.
Brian snorts. "Yeah right."
Beca is so fucking lucky she's next to Aubrey's non-working arm and that Aubrey can't open the door to shove her out of the car.
"Moving on…" Julia saves her.
"Speaking of drugs," Brian says, "Do you need to get any prescriptions filled? There's a twenty-four hour Walgreens around the corner from our place. I can drop you guys off then head over that way."
"That would be wonderful." Julia hands him the piece of paper.
Aubrey closes her eyes and leans her head back against the seat as the car starts moving and they all go quiet again, allowing her to have some peace.
xxxxx
"Home sweet home!" Conrad sings, and when Aubrey opens her eyes, she isn't quite where she expected to be.
"This is the café," she points out.
"I know. We live above it," Conrad says as Brian turns off the car, "Why do you think we're always here?"
Aubrey doesn't have an answer for that. Sure, the building is two stories, but she never imagined that anyone lived up there.
"It's very rainbow," Julia points out, "I like the color changing porch light."
"Thank you!" Conrad exclaims, "We can synchronize it to music."
"It was a pain in the fucking ass to set up," is all Brian has to say about it.
"Come inside," Conrad says as he exits the car.
Julia is the first one out, followed by Beca, and Aubrey has to wait until one of them is fully out of the car to follow. She ends up getting out on Julia's side, then just sort of stands there as everyone shuts the car doors. It's all so familiar: the rainbow colors, the giant 'Yaaas Queens!' sign, the donut decals on the window. At the same time, it feels like she's never seen any of it before in her life.
"What do you think?" Conrad asks Beca.
"I think I'm afraid of becoming the victim of a hate crime next," Beca answers.
"Astoria is the next gay mecca, Beca," Conrad replies.
"That was a really great rhyme."
"Thank you. But seriously, no one is coming around here with their hate," Conrad says, "I serve too many Broadway stars, and the last thing anyone wants, even the straights, is someone like Idina Menzel hating them because they torched her favorite coffee shop."
"Idina Menzel comes here?" Beca asks in a disbelieving tone.
Conrad grins. "Sometimes."
"What does she order?"
"People's coffee choices are personal, Beca. I can't just share that kind of information."
"Bet she really likes iced coffee."
Aubrey follows them around the side of the building to the stairs.
"That joke is so old," Conrad replies, "I wish people would just let it go."
Julia exhales a small laugh. "So, do you own this place or do you pay Rent?"
It's official. Aubrey hates all of them.
"Oh, this place is mine," Conrad answers and unlocks the door, "Wicked, right?"
Maybe life itself just needs an emergency eject button…
"Where's my little boy Bark Twain?!" Conrad calls as he opens the door, "I don't hear him barking!"
Right… They have a dog. Aubrey follows behind everyone else, cringing at the sound of tiny nails scraping hardwood floor as it comes bounding into the kitchen at top speed.
"There he is!"
She closes the door behind her, standing perfectly still as a dalmatian begins weaving around everyone's legs, swinging its tail back and forth like a whip.
"Be careful," Conrad says, "Sometimes he pees a little when he's excited. But don't we all?"
There is nowhere to get out of the way, so Aubrey stands partially behind Julia, hovering so close to her that they're almost touching. As Conrad picks the dog up, a tiny bit of relief washes over her.
"Who's a good dog?" Conrad asks in baby voice, and the dog stops squirming in his arms, "Who is the best dog? It's Bark Twain!" This leads to more out of control squirming.
"Are you scared of dogs?" Julia asks and glance back at Aubrey.
"No." Aubrey steps out of the way as Conrad places Bark back down on the floor and he tries to sniff Aubrey's feet.
"Hi," Julia coos and sits down on the floor with him. He's in her lap in two seconds flat, rolling over on his back to expose his belly. "You are so cute." She rubs his belly then doesn't even cringe when he leaps up and starts licking her face.
"Just don't open your mouth," Conrad said, "He'll stick his tongue all the way in there. Dinner anyone?"
Julia grins and kisses the dog on the side of the head.
"I think I just want to shower and go to bed," Aubrey answers. Her stomach isn't killing her nearly as much as it was before, but her exhaustion is.
"You have to eat and drink," Julia replies, "We just had this whole discussion at the hospital."
"I'll eat breakfast," Aubrey assures her, "I promise."
"You will," Julia agrees, "And you'll eat something now too. Even if it's just a bite of something and some water."
"And if I don't?" Aubrey dares to ask.
"If you don't…" Julia gets to her feet and folds her arms, locking eyes with her, "I will follow you around this place, food in hand, and become the most irritating person you have ever met, until you change your mind. And, Sweetheart, I am very tired and…" -she searches for a word- "sad right now, and I can't say I'm going to be in the best mood if I have to do that. But I will do it. Do you want to try me?"
Aubrey backs down, feeling like a kid being scolded in front of her friends.
"What did you make?" Julia asks Conrad.
"It's chicken noodle soup," Conrad says, "But I was feeling creative, so I used seashell pasta."
"That's perfect," Julia says.
"You guys sit," Conrad says and walks to the refrigerator, "I will heat it up for you."
The table only seats four – which is fine now, but won't be where there's six of them here. Aubrey sits down closest to the door. Once again, she ends up being the person in the middle. It's an odd feeling. Usually wherever she's with other people, Chloe is the one who sits in the middle. She startles as a bowl is placed down in front of her with a clank against the table. It's only about a third of the way full.
"Just eat as much as you can," Julia instructs, "And then you can shower, if you want to, and go to sleep."
xxxxx
Aubrey's throat protests before her stomach does. She manages half the broth before it burns too much to keep going and she places her spoon down in her bowl. "Maybe I be excused?" …how long has it been since she last used those words at the dinner table? Years.
Julia reaches over and pushes her bowl back a few inches as a sign she doesn't have to eat anymore. "How about you wait for Beca to join you?"
"I think I can do it." Aubrey gets up to wash her bowl.
"And I think you're a fall risk," Julia replies, "Please wait for Beca or I'm going to come help you."
The fact that Aubrey needed to use the chair for support to stand doesn't help her case much. She carries her bowl to the sink, rinses it, and places it in the dishwasher before returning to her chair.
"If it makes you feel any better, I'm almost done," Beca states.
It doesn't. It's a matter of independence, not a matter of patience. Aubrey sits back down and rests her head against her hand, her elbow impolitely on the table. The house isn't what she expected it to be, and she looks around at as much as she can see without actually turning her head while she waits. She thought it would be just like downstairs – covered in rainbow flags and glitter. Instead, it's quite the opposite. The floors are a beautiful grey hardwood with cool undertones, the appliances black, the countertops made of white marble. In fact, the only color Aubrey sees outside of some of their odds and ends is deep blue – like the bowls they're eating from and the art on the walls. It's quite a lovely place. She actually really likes it.
"Done." Beca drops her spoon in her bowl then takes it to the sink then the dishwasher.
"Your suitcases are in the guest room," Conrad says, "I'll show you." He turns to Julia, who is more or less just swirling her spoon around in the remainder of her broth. "I'll show you when you're done."
"Okay. Thank you." Julia offers him a smile then makes a small 'oh' sound as her phone goes off. "Dad," she says simply as she pulls it out of her pocket and presses it to her ear. "Hey, Love. Did you talk to him?"
It's difficult to eavesdrop when Conrad is suddenly ushering her and Beca from the room to the hall. They pass through the living room on the way, which is equally as nice as the kitchen. But, also like the kitchen, it's very small to be accommodating six people. The couch is made for three and there are no armchairs in sight. What are they supposed to do? Even if Aubrey did want them in her own apartment right now, which has she might consider if it wasn't for Beca, it'd still be a tight squeeze there too.
"This is the guest room," Conrad says, "I know it's tight, but at least there's a queen size bed. Oh, and the window to the fire escape is in here, but, don't worry, it locks."
"Why do you have a fire escape?" Aubrey asks, "You're on the second floor."
"Because I live above a bakery," Conrad answers, "I'm not the only thing flaming down there."
Right.
"Anyway. The bathroom is the other door on this side of the hall. I'll leave you to it."
"Well, at least there's a dresser and a closet in here too," Beca points out.
"I don't plan on unpacking." What does she have to unpack anyway aside from a few dresses, some undergarments, and some leggings? All of her clothes are a few blocks away in her own dresser and her own closet where they belong, and that's where they're going to stay.
"More room for me then."
Aubrey digs out her pajamas and the plastic cover that goes over her cast.
"What about your shoulder?" Beca asks.
They had checked it for infection at the hospital earlier, and told her that it was healing well. And then, at Aubrey's request, they bandaged it back up so she wouldn't have to look at it. She could ask Julia to wrap it up in saran wrap so the bandage doesn't get wet, but she's on the phone with her husband. She knows she's going to have to face it eventually. It's inevitable.
Aubrey places her things on the bed then picks at the medical tape, one piece at a time. It's her shoulder, at least. It's difficult to see it without purposely trying to look at it or catching a glimpse of it in the mirror.
"That looks a lot better than it did," Beca comments.
Aubrey folds the bandage up to throw it away in the bathroom trash.
"Have you looked at it yet?" Beca asks.
"I don't know, Beca," Aubrey snaps out of sheer tiredness and gathers her things back up, along with their shower caddies, "Have you looked at Chloe?"
They're both silent after that.
xxxxx
"I thought you said I could take your leggings off."
Aubrey looks up from where she's sitting on the closed toilet seat in the process of removing her clothes. "I don't think you earned it today."
"I have to earn it now?" Beca asks with raised eyebrows. "I thought all I had to do was piss you off enough to want to torture me."
"This isn't torture enough?" Aubrey pulls her own leggings off and folds them in her lap.
Beca looks away with a smile, their conversation about Aubrey's injury and Chloe pushed to the side for now already. "Touché." She finishes pulling her shirt off then turns around and turns on the faucet.
"What are you doing?" Aubrey asks when she neglects to turn on the shower nozzle.
"I told you, I bought you a duck."
"Beca, I am exhausted right now. I don't want to play with your stupid duck."
"And you don't think taking a bath as opposed to standing in the shower would feel good right now?" Beca grabs a bottle from the side of the tub and turns around to show it to her. "They have bubbles."
Aubrey ignores her and takes her dress and her underwear off.
"Would you like me to unhook your bra?"
"No, I think I'll bathe with it on."
Beca looks back and forth between Aubrey and the tub, and Aubrey rolls her eyes.
"Unhook it."
Beca finishes pouring bubble bath into the tub then comes over and unlatches her bra.
"This is the last time," Aubrey informs her as she slides the cover over her cast, "I'm getting my bras that hook in the front from home tomorrow."
"I can still unhook those too."
The tiny nagging voice in Aubrey's head telling her this is wrong has found a megaphone. "We'll see."
Beca turns the water off once the tub is half full and retrieves the rubber duck from where it was hiding between her clean clothes. "Are you getting in or are you just going to sit there?"
Aubrey taps her leg for a second as she stares at the water before she decides to ask for help. "I need you to put my hair up so it doesn't get wet."
"Do you have a hair-tie?"
Aubrey holds up her wrist.
Beca tosses the duck into the tub where it sinks down through the bubbles, then pulls Aubrey's hair-tie from her wrist.
"Ow, Beca," Aubrey complains when she pulls her hair.
"I'm sorry."
Aubrey sighs and sits as still as possible, waiting for Beca to figure out how to get her hair into a bun.
"There. Do you want help up?"
"I can do it." Aubrey uses the edge of the counter to get up on her own. Getting into the bathtub without anything to grab onto is going to be difficult, but she's accepted enough help from Beca for the day. She swats Beca's hand away when Beca tries to assist her and uses the wall to the best of her ability to get in and sit down. She manages to do it without falling, and that's all that matters.
Beca follows her and sits on the side near the faucet, crisscross so she's facing the room. "If I ever have to share a bath with anyone else, I'm taking the comfortable side."
Aubrey sinks down, one leg folded under her, the other stretched out over Beca's lap. "You couldn't have made it warmer?" The water isn't exactly cold, but it isn't hot either. Who bathes in room temperature water?
"No," Beca answers, "Your mom said you had a fever and before that you were freezing."
Aubrey frowns and leans her head to the side.
"Dude, speaking of freezing and what Conrad said earlier about Idina Menzel, I was thinking," Beca says, "Hear me out."
"About what?"
"The two of you should be friends."
Aubrey arches her brows.
"I mean, you're basically Elsa."
"I don't like where this is going," Aubrey warns her.
"Only instead of shooting ice out of your hands at people, you-"
Aubrey sends a giant wave of water in Beca's direction before she can finish that thought. "Go to hell."
Beca laughs and leans her head back against the wall.
"Olaf."
"Elsa likes Olaf," Beca reminds her, "She created him."
Whatever. Beca is probably right though. Out of all the Disney movies Chloe has made her watch, Frozen is the one she understands. Chloe most likely just tries to relate her to Rapunzel so she doesn't hurt her feelings. Also, Aubrey would be star-struck if she ever met Idina Menzel. "She didn't mean for him to be alive, and then she pawned him off on Anna."
Beca digs the duck out from where it's hiding beneath the bubbles and sends it floating in Aubrey's direction.
What the hell is she supposed to do with a rubber duck? She creates a wave with her hand that sends it in the other direction, then narrows her eyes when Beca sails it back again. Before she knows it, she's engaged in some weird form of air hockey using a duck and water, which Beca definitely has an advantage in because she has two working hands. "Beca!" she cries as water splashes over the edge of the tub.
"It's water. I'll clean it up with a towel."
"Water damage can be very serious." Aubrey is breathing hard, feeling like she ran a marathon after just that little bit of splashing around. She turns her entire body and rests her head on the tub ledge, and tries to relax.
"That doesn't look comfortable at all."
It isn't. "We're in a bathtub."
"Sit up." Beca braces herself against the wall as she stands and climbs around Aubrey as she reluctantly obliges. "This is way more comfortable," she says as she sits down behind Aubrey.
"You moved for yourself."
"I can move back." Beca attempts to get up, but Aubrey pulls her back down. "I really wouldn't have pegged you as the cuddling type."
"Stop talking."
"Yes, your heinous."
Aubrey is about to elbow her, but Beca must know that, because she wraps her arms around her and prevents her from doing so. And Aubrey is too weak to put up a fight. She just sinks back and closes her eyes when Beca grabs her things from the caddie and begins to wash her off. "I'm too tired for sex tonight," she admits as Beca kisses the side of her neck.
Beca just makes a humming sound and kisses behind her ear, her lips cool against Aubrey's still slightly heated skin – and Aubrey could fall asleep right like this.
She almost does fall asleep.
Beca jostles her a few moments later to keep her awake – and to convince her to sit up so they can get out of the tub and dry off.
Under normal circumstances, Aubrey would want to use the shower to rinse off the dirty water and the bubbles sticking to her skin. But the effort that would take right now is too much, even for her. She uses her foot to pull the plug out of the drain and sits there watching the water swirl around while Beca gets up to get them towels. Only not only is she getting towels, she's watching Aubrey poke at the mini whirlpool with her toes to destroy it and watch it reform again. "What?"
"Nothing. Here."
Aubrey looks up to see a towel being extended to her. Why does standing how to take the same amount of energy as climbing a hundred stairs? She pushes herself up and pauses as all the blood rushes to her head and her vision goes dark around the edges for a second.
"You good?" Beca asks.
It takes a moment for her body to sort itself out, and Aubrey nods once she's as good as she's going to get it. She climbs out of the tub and takes the towel. In the time it takes her to dry herself off with one hand, Beca has already dried off and is cleaning the water off the floor with exaggerated effort. She gives her a look and hangs the towel on a hook then sets to work on getting dressed. God, she can't wait until this stupid arm heals – if it heals. She watches her fingers move and it's like using her mind to work some kind of prosthetic. What if she can never feel it again? But she can feel it. She pauses after she has her pants on and squeezes the area between her cast and the gunshot wound to feel the pressure.
"You should have the doctors here look at it," Beca says.
Aubrey manages to get her shirt on by herself, and it occurs to her how absolutely ridiculous it is that she's proud she can dress herself. "I'll talk to them tomorrow when I go to see Chloe."
xxxxx
"Aubrey," Brian calls her from the living room when she's in the hall. He holds up a pharmacy bag when she turns around. "I'm going to put it in the kitchen medicine cabinet so the dog doesn't try doing drugs again."
Okay then…
"They got a trooper out front keeping an eye on the place," Brian adds, "How excited do you think he is to be parked outside a donut shop? We're going to make a shit ton of money."
"You of all people should know that stereotypes are not always true," Conrad chimes in.
"Says the walking stereotype," Brian replies.
"Where's my mom?" Aubrey asks.
"She went to the guest room to talk to your dad," Conrad answers.
The door is open and Aubrey doesn't hear anything. She turns and walks inside, followed by Beca, to find her fast asleep with the phone next to her face. She mustn't have fallen asleep that long ago, because Aubrey can hear her dad still talking like he thinks she's awake. She carefully places her things down then picks it up without waking her and presses it to her ear. "Dad?" she whispers.
"Daughter," Noah greets her, "What happened to your mom?"
"She fell asleep." Aubrey debates whether or not she should wake her up, then decides against it. She seems comfortable enough in the long t-shirt and leggings she's wearing.
"That explains why she's been ignoring me the past five minutes," Noah says.
Aubrey balances the phone between her ear and good shoulder and grabs Julia's blanket from their luggage. It's difficult, like everything else these days, but she manages to cover her up with it. "I think we're all about to go to bed."
"Before you turn in," Noah says, "I need a favor."
"What kind?"
"How about you step out so you don't wake her up?"
Aubrey looks at Beca. "I'll be right back."
Beca nods.
"Okay?" Aubrey asks once she reaches the hallway.
"Look," Noah says, "I told my son to stay put until I get to him, but I don't trust his listening skills. If he shows up at that hospital, I need you to keep him away from your Momma, because he is not going to be happy that he is just now finding out about Chloe. I know you can do that. You understand?"
"I don't understand," Aubrey admits, "He's been kind to me every time I've met him."
"Yeah, well, he got two sides – and one of those sides is cruel to her. He's all bark and no bite, but he knows how to hit her where it hurts. He says one thing to her, you got my permission to punch him in the mouth – just not where she can see it."
"I'm sorry?"
"You don't have kids, so you don't understand. Any good person doesn't want to hit their kid, but sometimes you wish karma would."
Aubrey is still trying to process.
"I know your Mom is doing a good job at keeping it together right now, but I also know that her whole world is being turned upside down right now with what happened to Chloe – and the last thing she needs is that boy making it all worse. I know it's a lot to ask with everything you're going through, but I'm not there to do it myself."
"But why does he hate her so much?"
"It's not your business," Noah answers, "And I know you; don't you go pokin' around trying to figure it out. There are only two things you need to know about your mom. You know what they are?"
Aubrey doesn't answer.
"One: She is the most genuine, loving person you're ever gonna meet in your whole life. Two: She adores you. She has done more for you than you even know, and she's never gonna ask you for anything back, because she loves you and that's how she is," Noah says, "So, you do this one thing for her and mind your business."
"Okay," Aubrey agrees.
"Oh, and one more thing," Noah adds, "She told me about everything that happened today, and I have to say – anyone who has a broken arm, a bullet wound, is puking blood, and is still going is the last person I would want to meet in a dark alley. I don't care what that other guy who you call a father says; you should have been a marine and I'm proud of you."
Aubrey looks at the floor, doing a shit job at blinking back the tears that start stinging her eyes. "Thank you."
"I'll be home the day after tomorrow. Be good. Look out for your mom. I love you, Aubrey."
"I love you too, Dad."
xxxxx
Aubrey stands in the hallway for awhile thinking about what he said. Not the part about keeping Julia and Daniel separated. The part where he said he's proud of her. Hell, 'thinking about it' is an overstatement. She stands there, spaced out, playing it on repeat in her head until Brian steps into the hallway and snaps her out of it.
"Should I blow up the air mattress for your mom?"
Aubrey glances at the bedroom then shakes her head. "She already fell asleep. Just do it tomorrow."
Brian nods. They both stand there, awkward, before he moves first and closes the distance between them, pulling her into a hug. "I'm glad you're home." He presses a kiss to her hair. "Get some sleep. Feel better." Then he releases her and walks to his room.
"He always goes to bed without me," Conrad complains from the living room, "I need him to go to bed last so I don't have to have to run from the kitchen demon after I turn out the lights." He does indeed run to the hallway after turning out all the lights. "Men, am I right?" Before Aubrey can respond, he's wrapping her in a hug too and kissing her on the cheek. "Don't worry. The kitchen demon won't come into the hallway, because we keep the bathroom light on. That's not why we keep the light on; that's just why he won't come into the hallway." He backs up toward his room. "Night, Aubs, love ya."
"Goodnight." Aubrey sidesteps a little as the dog scrambles past her and darts into the guys' room after them. She turns and walks back to the bedroom, feeling dazed and not entirely present. She is, however, aware enough to dig Julia's phone charger out of her bag and plug her phone in for her. She places it on the nightstand then walks around the bed so it's Beca who she's crawling over.
"You can't just crawl up from the bottom?" Beca complains as Aubrey tries to maneuver over her. "Dude, ow, your knee is crushing my spleen."
Aubrey ignores her and situates herself in the middle. "Go dim the light."
"Seriously? You were just over there."
"And I would have crushed more than just your spleen trying to crawl over you with the light dimmed."
Beca moans and gets up. "If I knew you wanted me to get the light, I could have moved so wouldn't have had to crawl over me."
"Oops." Aubrey sinks down into the pillows. She stills when Julia stirs – but she's just rolling over. Her hand comes to rest on Aubrey's arm, and Aubrey 'reluctantly' inches in closer until she's being wrapped up in a full body hug. So what? Maybe Aubrey has just gotten used to sleeping like this. It's about routine.
Beca dims the light until they can just barely see, then crawls into bed and collapses on her stomach directly beside Aubrey. It's a queen sized bed, yet, here they are, all huddled together, leaving little space between them. "I feel like I'm five, crawling in bed with my parents again." The way she says it makes it difficult to tell if that's a good thing or a bad thing.
If this is what that feels like though, Aubrey missed out all those nights she felt alone and couldn't sleep. "Goodnight, Beca," she says, fully intending to stay awake for at least a little while and think about the events of the day – maybe even make use of that phone. It doesn't work. Beca finds her hand, and she's asleep within minutes, sandwiched safely between the two of them.
