The trip from Axel to Arcanretia is about a day and a half, which is a long time to spend in a carriage in awkward silence.

"Hey, I bought some string before we left. Feast your eyes on this!" I quickly flipped through the motions and in under a minute had a decent Tokyo Tower spread between my hands.

The others clapped politely. "I like playing games, but I forgot my cards and didn't have room for a game board. Do you know more?" Yunyun asked.

"Sure, I know a bunch from when I did physical therapy for my hand. First you loop it through your hands like this," I demonstrated then went through each motion a lot slower so they could follow.

"Here, give it a try. I've got another string." Pulling out another loop, I ran through a standard cat's cradle.

"How'd you break your hand?" Kyouya asked, watching with amusement.

"I wish I could say it was for something cool like saving someone from kidnapping, but it was really, really stupid. I was on the class relay team for a school festival and tripped, and that took down the guy behind me and he stepped on my hand and fell too, and before you know it there was a three or four guy pileup with me screaming on the bottom of it. Total mess, we lost the race of course. They never did let me live it down."

"School festival?" Fio asked. "I've never heard of that. Were you a merchant's son or something in your land?"

"Nah, my family is common as dirt. We weren't poor, but we sure weren't anybody important either. Everybody went, whether they liked it or not. You had to sit in classes listening to lectures and take exams all day until you were 18 or so. More if you wanted to do anything besides work in a restaurant or something."

"We d-do that too, but only for a few years until we learn magic," Yunyun added.

"I didn't know there were any public schools here at all," Kyouya commented to her with surprise. "I'd thought everyone either used private tutors or the local priest would teach some classes."

"W-we do in the village. Since studying old languages and math i-is important for learning Advanced Magic and becoming an Archwizard." Yunyun confirmed. "We also have one of the biggest archives in the kingdom for that reason. I spent a lot of time there growing up since there was always something I-I hadn't seen before. And it was quiet most of the time unless someone needed something."

"I never thought I'd say it, but I miss my old school. What my friends are doing, who took over the soccer club from me. Little things like that, I guess" Kyouya smiled fondly, clearly imagining a way different high school experience than I remembered.

Any of those were the last things on my mind, though then again with that magic can opener of his he probably never had to worry about where he was sleeping that night, or getting eaten by a toad.

"Oh, Kyouya! I'm sure they're all doing great!" Fio leaned in from beside him "Besides, you have people who need you here way more."

"Right!" Clemea hurriedly agreed, leaning on his other side "You're doing way more important things now than something like 'studying!''

Yunyun's eyes flicked away at the barb, looking lost at how to reply.

"Working towards bringing down the Demon King is the most important thing anyone could do," the twit agreed.

I noticed Yunyun fiddling with the string again, and picked up mine. "Hang on, your left ring finger is in the wrong loop," I said, and we went back to playing.

It was my first actual RPG style adventure here, but I'd played enough back home to know there was always some dramatic friction in the party. Still, if he hadn't wound up here however he did, I was starting to guess Kyouya would have gotten stabbed before he graduated.

—-

That took us through the afternoon until we stopped for the night. Yunyun had quick hands and a great memory. I'd heard that the Crimson Demons were sharp, but since it had been Megumin saying that I'd blown it off. If Yunyun was typical, I'd definitely underestimated them.

"Yunyun, why don't you join us? I'd rather not go into the woods alone" Fio asked, Clemea chiming in agreement as well.

She jumped to her feet and hurried over, cheerfully following the other two girls to the treeline.

"It's good for them to talk to other girls, they tend to hang around me most of the time since they're so dedicated to ending the Demon King's threat."

I stared at the oblivious fool for a long minute, then answered "So why didn't you recruit a wizard before?"

"We never really seemed to need anyone else before. I've been here about a year and a month, and I met the two of them just over a year ago. But both of them have seen the villainy of the Demon King's lackeys first hand. Clemea as a refugee from a border village, and Fio from when her trader family lost everything to a raid on a caravan. They're in for the long haul, and that's what counts."

"They do seem really devoted," I agreed, wondering if this was what it felt like to watch a train wreck in progress. Not that I would know anything about relationships. None of the girls in any of my schools wanted anything to do with me even before I started my home security guard career, and 'girls' in game chat didn't count even for me. Maybe they really were that focused on staying by his side because being the ones to avenge their fallen family and countrymen, cut down the Great Enemy, save the land, and become legends alongside Kyouya was really that important to them. It might be totally possible.

But somehow I doubted it.

The girls came back not long afterwards as I finished getting a small fire started. The caravan provided food of course, but we did need to do a few of our own chores. As expected Fio and Clemea made a beeline for their 'leader' who was chatting up the next group over, dragging him back and flanking him as soon as he sat down.

Yunyun trailed behind, eyes dim and face pale, as she went directly to the big cookfire in the center of the circle of wagons that made up the camp perimeter.

Watching the three for a moment, I got a glare and jerk of the head from Clemea to get lost. For once catching the hint I was a fifth wheel, I got up and followed Yunyun. The cook hadn't quite gotten the chow line set up yet, but there was a big basket of cracker-like things I grabbed a handful of as I went by.

"An eris for your thoughts?" I asked with a grand sweep of one arm as I offered her some.

Yunyun muttered a thanks, nibbling a cracker while she sat on a boulder, looking at me a bit quizzically. Given Megumin I thought she'd expect a little drama.

"They kicked me out too," I answered the unasked question. "After I'd gotten the fire started, naturally."

She hmmmed, watching the cooks at work like a few other travelers with nothing better to do. They really were pretty good, I was never much of a cook but they handled prepping a stew like an assembly line. One assistant stunning the potatoes and onions with a mallet to the outside before each time they opened up a new barrel, the next dicing them up and passing them to the cook who tossed them in lidded pot hanging on a tripod and tended the fire for a moment before going back to the big cast iron griddles over another fire, holding what looked like most of a hog's worth of pork chops. The sizzle was already making me a bit hungry, quick snack or not.

"Wish I could handle a knife like that," I mused after a while, watching the him carve off a few more chops. "I doubt poor Shooting Star would be up to that job though." I decided, patting the knife at my belt.

"It's e-easier than it looks once you have the trick." Yunyun replied after a moment. "You just have to notch the chine bone first. With a-a good strength stat you don't even need a cleaver."

I must have looked as surprised as I felt, because she flushed and started rapid fire explaining, so fast I could barely make her out. "We don't really have servants in the Village, and Dad spends the whole day out…being the Chief basically. Plus there's only one restaurant and bar so I learned a lot about how to cook and things like that!"

Gasping a bit after getting all that out in one breath, she then froze, then jumped off her perch and hurried off with a sidelong glance at my even more puzzled face.

Watching her go, I fed myself another cracker. Seriously, knowing a bit about how to process an animal wasn't that big a deal. I didn't know squat about it, but a lot of adventurers probably did. What in the world had those glorified cheerleaders said to her?

The next half day was more of the same, light conversation or games mixed with periods of staring out the windows at the scenery going by. By around lunchtime though, there started to be a lot more greenery around, and the carriage had definitely been climbing a slope for the last while.

Finally, we crested the hills that seemed to ring the city, and got our first look at Arcanretia. Canals ran alongside the streets, which were lined with bathhouses and fountains fed by aquifers from the towering mountains home to natural geothermal springs and clear lakes. All the buildings were primarily blue, creating a beautiful skyline, and everyone seemed excited and happy as we rolled into the carriage stop just inside the gate.

"Arcanretia! Arcanretia!" the caravan boss bellowed, his assistants repeating it down the line as passengers shuffled around and either got off the carriages or checked their cargo before looking for an inn for the night. It hadn't been a bad ride, really. Maybe I could see about applying for one of the escort quests at the guild once I'd gotten a few more levels.

"We'll need to stop over until tomorrow morning before we can catch the next trader to Ahrensbach." Kyouya reminded everyone once we arrived at our inn right off the square. "Let's meet at the inn for dinner, until then I'd like to stretch out a bit."

That sounded like a good plan after being stuck together in a carriage, so the trio went one way, and Yunyun said she was going to check in on someone in town she knew.

So I figured that the best way to see the sights was to take a walk. I hadn't gone on my high school's class trip, and junior high's was just a lame trip to Tokyo Tower, so traveling like this was really exciting for me. I strolled along one of the main streets that radiated towards the city market square, when I noticed a little girl holding a flower basket. She was a cute, blue haired little thing, maybe 9 or 10 years old in a black and white dress with some sort of dark, not quite navy blue flowers in her basket. Like someone had called her name, her head whipped around as I walked past and she hurried over.

"Mister! Mister! Please, take a flower!" she shouted, holding one out in one hand and waving it over her head.

"Ah…sure" I agreed hesitantly, reaching for my coin purse. What can I say, I'm weak to cute little girls asking me for things. Just ask my grandkids.

She smiled up at me with the most peaceful, serene expression I'd seen on a kid, and shook her little head after taking a deep breath through her nose. "Don't worry, you've already paid." She handed over the…drug flower, I guess? Was I about to get high from holding this thing? I very gingerly took it, holding on by my fingertips and eyeing a place to dump it ASAP, but when I looked back she had vanished in the crowd.

Now just slightly creeped out, I dropped the suspicious thing in the canal once I'd turned the corner.

I'd heard…things…about the Axis cult. Everyone who isn't living in a cave has, of course. But one of the things I had heard was that they had some absolutely gorgeous buildings here, and none more so than the cathedral of Arcanretia.

Deciding for once in my life to take an opportunity to get cultured for a while, I followed the main street towards the city square. You could actually see the belfry above the roofs in most places, so it wasn't exactly hard to navigate. What was getting to me were the people.

Once, I saw a woman a bit older than me, carrying a basket of apples. She looked like she was about to drop them, but at the last second she recovered and smoothly plucked one out. She offered it to me with a reverent bow and that same deep inhalation. Not sure what else to do, I took it and returned the bow as best I could.

"You honor me, how may I assist you?" she asked breathlessly, holding the bow even after I'd returned upright.

"Ah, nothing in particular. I'm just on the way to the cathedral." I answered hesitantly, causing her to flush cutely with embarrassment.

"Forgive me, your holiness! I have no right to detain you! Please have a blessed day!" She shot bolt upright and hurried off before I could correct her.

Still holding the apple, by the stem and a bit away from my face, I considered it for a minute. She'd been coming back from the market from the usual stuff I'd seen in her bag with the apples. She was probably planning to eat this thing, so it wasn't LIKELY it was messed with but still…

After a moment's thought, I wrapped it in the scrap of shirt linen I used as a handkerchief and tucked it in a pocket before walking on. I'd had a couple of weird encounters, sure but I'd come this far so I hated to turn back now.

This proved to be a mistake.

I did get to the main square without any problems. At least not big ones, for example a random dwarf, big bushy beard and all, had tried to get me to endorse his restaurant but I'd managed to beg him off saying I was needed at the cathedral.

Once I got there though, I decided it was worth the trip. I'd seen photos here and there of the various famous landmarks back home: Notre Dame, St. Peter's, even whichever one had Brunechelli's dome since I'd done a report in school on it. And they were beautiful no doubt about it, especially if you're not like me and actually into architecture.

Arcanretia's was in a class of its own. I know next to nothing about what they teach their master masons here, but they were doing something right. Craning my head back, I tried to follow the shining white buttresses that looked far too thin to support all the weight they had to be carrying up to where they joined the cathedral proper, the meeting point marked by an enormous stained glass window of their goddess holding the Axis cult symbol in both hands above her head, somehow looking three dimensional in spite my knowing it HAD to be just colored glass in a frame.

Shaking my head in admiration, I followed the small crowd going inside.

The inside was every bit as lovely, I think. I'm to this day not totally sure, because almost as soon as I got through the door a priestess took one look at me, dropped her broom she was sweeping up with, and sprinted for the back of the church.

Seconds later, while I was seriously wondering if I'd forgotten to bathe or I was just hallucinating having my pants on or what, an elderly man came out at a trot from where the priestess had gone, brushing graying hair into place before fixing his cap.

"Your Holiness! Blessed be this day! I am the High Priest of this humble house of worship to our Divine Lady, Zesta. How might I assist you today?"

Someone like Kyouya, who had probably never felt unwelcome a day in his life, would probably be eating this up as his just due. Me, on the other hand? I was about half a step short of a panic attack at having someone this obviously important acting like I was his boss' boss.

Mistaking my stunned silence for permission to continue, the High Priest gestured to a double door on the left hand wall, opposite the line of confessionals I saw taking up the other wall. "We would be most honored to offer you our hospitality. Please, take a moment to relax after your journey. Our baths are famous even among the fine establishments of the city, and we've recently expanded them with the help of a mage with Explosion magic. I must say the residual magic makes the experience even more…invigorating!" he finished with a sparkle in his eyes that looked downright disturbing on a man old enough to be my grandfather.

"In particular, it would be my pleasure to join you in contemplation once I finish a trifling errand I simply can't put off. If you'd allow Priestess Rosalie here to see to your needs in my absence I would be most obliged." He gestured at the woman who followed him out without my noticing, a lovely brunette of about 30 with green eyes that seemed to be sizing me up like a roast waiting to be carved.

Yeah. Call me what you want. Coward, eunuch, whatever. I took one look at this whole mess, and I ran for the hills.

—-

"Find him!" called a priest below me on the street bellowed about an hour later, waving a staff. "His Holiness can't be allowed to leave displeased with us! Our Lady would curse us for generations with her wrath!" he shouted desperately at the small Axis pursuit squad. One of several making up a skirmish line fanning out from the cathedral judging by the faint answering shouts I heard from the next streets over.

From my perch in the shadows on a third floor roof, I eyed my 'hosts'. The other priest was carrying a weighted fishing net on a rope, while the priestess had loops of line in one hand. One end tied to a thin pole, and to the other her 'bait' she held in the other hand. Winding up with a spinning motion around her head, she hurled it expertly onto a balcony not far below me.

"Are you sure this is going to work?" the younger priest, blue haired and rail thin, asked, clutching his capture net nervously.

"I don't see why not," his bald, middle aged superior shrugged. "It's how we always lure in the High Priest when we need to track him down, so it should be even more effective on His Holiness. Cecily, try that alleyway over there, I thought I saw something move."

"'Kay!" the blue eyed blonde chirped, and the black, lacy, charmingly medium sized bra that had landed maybe 6 meters below me flitted away with a flick of her wrist, soaring across the street to land at the entrance of the alley. Giving the line a few tugs to make it wriggle enticingly on the ground, she then slowly reeled the line in hand over hand. "Maybe we should try a fresh one? This one's already going to be a pain to get the dirt out of" she pouted.

"Can't hurt, have you got a spare?"

"No, but just a minute." She pulled her arms into her sleeves and wriggled a moment, before producing a sky blue sample from inside her robes. Taking the old one off the line, she hooked the 'fresher' one on in its place and launched another cast.

As much as I'd have loved to see that priestess model what she was baiting me with under different circumstances, I was loyal to Chris not blind, I had had enough crazy for one day. Slipping down the trellis I'd climbed to get up here, I scooted down the side alley and cut across the street behind the search party there once they vanished around a bend, then ducked around a crowd of hot springs goers to screen me from anyone following up behind them before finding another handy 'substitute ladder' and going back up to the roofs to work my way home.

It took me over another hour to pick my way back to the caravan stop at our gate, and by then it was well dark and a hot springs dip of my own was sounding pretty amazing. Dropping from the rooftop onto the cobblestones outside our inn, once again I thanked the Monk Class for saving my bacon. Heaven knows how I'd have lived this long without it.

I pushed the door open, and walked over to the clerk's desk. The freckled, slightly pudgy teenager on duty looking up from polishing some of the woodwork to greet me.

"I've had a long day, and I don't want anyone to bother me tonight," I began, fishing in my coin pouch and placing a pair of 1000 eris coins on the counter "If anyone, absolutely anyone, comes asking about me, I'm in one of the big hot springs down the road and you don't know when I'll be back."

"We don't really…" the kid began, but before he could finish I pushed two more coins across. "Which one will you be visiting, sir?" he smiled pleasantly.

"Doesn't matter, just tell them I'll come find them. Thanks." I nodded at my accomplice, and headed upstairs.

"Finally!" Clemea growled as I thumped down onto the bench at their table. "Where have you been all day? We almost missed dinner waiting for you."

"More importantly, what in the world happened to you?" Fio asked, looking me over with concern and a bit of disgust. Arcanretia is an amazingly clean city, even by modern standards. But take a tour of its back routes and roofline and you'll find plenty of things to get on yourself you'd rather not be there. Shrugging, I pulled out my suspicious fruit and dropped it on the table. "I took the scenic tour. But before I clean up, what can you tell me about this?"

The Thief looked at me, then at the apple. Then at me, clearly waiting for the punchline. "It's an apple. Looks ripe, maybe a little bruised. What about it?" she finally answered.

"A woman in town gave it to me, and it was really weird. Really look it over, call it a favor if you want," I asked again seriously.

Shrugging, Fio did just that. She wasn't on Chris' level, but she had the standard set of Thief skills like Detect Trap, Appraise, and such so if there really was something wrong with it she should see it.

"Well, I was wrong. It's VERY bruised, and I sure wouldn't eat it. But besides you wasting food by throwing it into a wall or something there's nothing else to see," she gave her verdict with an annoyed glare for wasting her time. "If you don't have a rotten onion or something for me to examine for giggles, we were about to have another bath." I shook my head, still pondering, and the two girls got up and started making plans to entice Kyouya into the mixed part of the hotel hot springs. The lucky bastard.

Yunyun seemed to have taken over one of the game tables and had a partially played game of checkers in front of her, with a guidebook spread out in her lap. Reading from it she made a move for her opposite color, then carefully pondered her move before resetting the board and trying a different problem. Leaving her to it, I heaved myself up and dumped the apple in the trash, then made for the baths myself, the men's side sadly for me. If I wanted to get any kind of clean before they closed I'd better start now.