Thank you to the kind soul that told me I didn't upload correctly. I have hopefully fixed the issue and decided to condense the chapters because I'm limited on time to fiddle with the pace again. This was all edited by my friend Jade of the Without A Trace story. Not sure what we're doing here, but we're doing something I hope you enjoy.
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When they arrived at the station, Lin went to put her uniform on in the bathroom stall. She felt at home in the station. At least at work, nobody dared to comment about her appearance when she strolled in that night. She was more worried that people would comment about her age and how silly it was to dress like that, but it never came up, not even at the party.
The ride over had been a silent, hostile quiet. She wished she had gotten on the bison with anyone else but the people who were mad at her. Anyone could feel the stewing contempt.
Lin had already put on her uniform pants, feeling comfy again as she wrapped her chest down when Su knocked again on the stall door. She started asking her a million questions through the door, which had Lin wondering about death again and how it had to be perfect if she was going to actually try. She stepped out of the stall as she was pulling on her tank top, and she decided to keep the makeup on and her hair how Kya had styled it, as she told Su to relax.
"Why do you bind, Lin? Don't you feel uncomfortable?" Su asked, noticing the difference and she didn't think it was natural. Lin wondered what it would be like to have a body like her sisters.
"Not if you do it right. Besides, it helps me when I'm bending; and people don't treat me like I'm just the woman who was handed the Chief position because of her mother." Lin replied drily.
"That's ridiculous. You almost died working for Mom once, remember? Katara said you had a brain injury."
Lin felt a rush of anger but decided to hold her tongue, reminding herself that it was Toph's fault. She remembered how Toph had acted like she didn't know her and allowed Lin's superior officers to treat her as they pleased. She refused to be told that she had shown favoritism to one of her officers.
"When I look like one of them, they remember. The scars you gave me helped too."
Su flinched as she saw that Lin's scars were still covered with makeup. She wondered if Lin had ever felt unsightly because some people acted like defects were hideous. Toph had often laughed at how some of the public thought Lin was the result of an affair with the Fire Lord. Su knew that most rational people didn't think of it, but once Lin received her facial scars it made the rumor's of Lin's father worse. Though no one would say it out loud, or at least not to their faces.
"I'm still sorry I did that. I thought my life was over." Su awkwardly tried to jest.
"It was years ago, forget it. Now, I have a criminal to interrogate." Lin took a deep breath putting on the mask she wore for most of her life as a cop: blank, cold, and intimidating.
Su let her know she would be with the others. As the pair split, Lin walked down the hall, mentally preparing herself to see Tarrlok. The last time she had seen him, he had blood-bent them all. Maybe he had removed the people who had confessed to bending and sent them to the victims of their crimes; perhaps he was working with Amon. She only hoped he didn't know about the Haruk thing.
She stood on the other side of the interrogation window. She had put Saikan as the lead in the investigation with Mako and Korra, so she paused to get a feel of the room. She could feel Tarrlok's heartbeat from there. She remembered Tenzin had commented on how his face had been scarred, and she could tell that he had a robotic hand. So, he had been the one to blow up the boat. She was surprised that the blast hadn't killed him, but maybe his brother had saved him. She always had theorized that bloodbending could be used like healing, and with Amon's abilities he could have pulled it off. She knew Tarrlok thought about ending his life as well, but she never knew why he had wanted to. It had been an unspoken part of their relationship: his past, Tenzin, and admitting they loved each other.
Lin realized she had become lost in her feelings. She knocked on the window, just as Mako was becoming aggressive. He passed the line where it was just good cop and bad cop, and Tarrlok's silence had gotten into his head instead. Saikan made him leave, as Lin was just about to enter.
"Detective." Her voice trod lightly; she couldn't help being softer on him.
"He refuses to speak, to answer us. He said he wants to speak to you first privately." Mako made awkward eye contact.
"Well, that's not happening, and you losing your cool is not helping me. So get those sketches since you apparently can't keep your anger in check." Lin's eyes glowered at him.
Mako took a deep breath. "I hate that guy; I'm sorry." He hurried to do the task. He worried Lin would be disappointed in him.
Lin was surprised he snapped that fast, considering Korra had not. She then turned and marched into the room with authority. "Alright, I'm going to show you a photo, and you're going to tell me everything you know, Tarrlok."
With the way she spat out his name, Tarrlok realized that he wasn't going to be able to speak to her alone. He felt good in a twisted way. She was angry, so she must still care.
"Chief Beifong," he greeted, his tone having not changed in the slightest. "I would be happy to help with your investigation. However, at this time, I will have to let you know that I cannot do that."
"You mean you won't," Lin's voice was sharp, as she narrowed her eyes at him.
"Why not Tarrlok?" Korra asked, arms crossed as she stood over him.
Mako then returned, sliding the photo across the table. "You are working with him," Mako stated, having cooled down.
Tarlok looked at Lin, then Korra. Deciding not to even give Mako a second glance, which would surely piss him off. "That one might be the least of your problems," Tarlok smirked.
There was a pregnant pause.
"Too bad I can't help." He added.
Meanwhile, everyone else was seated in a waiting room of some sort. Asami flipped through a magazine, trying not to be reminded of her father or the horrible tension in this room. In the background she could hear harsh voices.
"I cannot believe you, Bumi," Tenzin scolded. He couldn't even look at his brother.
"It was all an act, Tenzin. You wouldn't last undercover if you can't even understand that." Bumi responded dryly.
"You flirted with his ex all night. What is one supposed to think?" Kya chimed in, discarding what she was reading; Asami sneakily took it as it was the only exciting magazine in the room.
Su sat beside her with Bolin, Opal, and Pema. She was enjoying the front row seat to the drama, glad she had come. Su had come because she expected that Opal would need more comfort, but instead, she found herself amid the juiciest scandal.
"Lin needs serious help, guys. Are you not paying attention?" Bumi questioned.
"And you're helping her with your tongue down her throat." Tenzin snapped.
Pema was feeling uncomfortable; was Tenzin jealous? Sure it was weird because it was his older brother, but to be that angry, made her think that her husband still had feelings for the older woman.
"I was trying to talk to her. She looks like she's at the end of the rope. I thought that if somebody made her feel comfortable, maybe she would talk" Bumi's voice was thoughtful.
"That's sweet Bumi, but you could have let her keep her clothes on and not put your hands all over her," Kya said.
"I'm serious. It was my biggest failure back when I was a Commander. I should have helped my men more, but instead, I enabled it. I still think about the funerals due to the former Commander's abuses and my neglect." Bumi looked down in shame, his voice wasn't as boisterous as usual.
"Not Lin, she would never end her life." Tenzin said. He had known her all his life, she never backed down from anything; she wouldn't quit at life.
"I didn't mean to get wrapped up. Besides, Lin kissed me first. She was playing a part, but I guess I got carried away," Bumi admitted, blushing.
"I didn't know you were a therapist Bumi; it's pretty unprofessional to have lipstick on your neck. Seriously, how did you not notice?" Kya motioned this still stained neck. Nobody told him, but she figured a civilized person would look at themselves to ensure.
Bumi ignored Kya. "I think she's acting this way because she's depressed. Too many things have been coming at her. I still remember the day Toph brought her to the island for Mom to check on her, all those years ago. She had that same empty look in her eye tonight."
"That day is coming up," Kya remembered quietly.
Su took in the information, not seeing this as likely. "Lin's fine. She's a soldier," Su said. "She always gets back up and fights. She's fine."
Kya ignored this, still thinking. She felt angry remembering the love triangle that happened.
"Isn't the anniversary coming up? Do you still go visit the grave?" Bumi asked, only now realizing what Kya had said.
"What anniversary?" Pema asked. Su sat up curiously, wondering what it was as well.
"Tenzin never told you about Yun An or oh-" Bumi covered his mouth.
Asami, for reasons she didn't understand, instantly thought back to the spirit world.
Pema was suddenly glad that she had Jinora take the kids home with Kai.
Tenzin sighed, saying, "I haven't gone, but I think about it daily." Tenzin could still remember the smell of iron and how he couldn't stand it, her crumpled up on the floor. It was like every other failed pregnancy beginning in their early adulthood.
"You left her for Pema and even admitted you were cheating like she was nothing to you. After she forced herself to get pregnant again after Yun An and the baby died, knowing that you would leave. You didn't even wait a month when she miscarried again." Kya spat. He deserved to feel the rage that Kya still felt towards him; it felt like he hadn't cared at all to the waterbender.
"You had a child?" Pema gasped; she was shocked and furious
"I told you to tell her, what is wrong with you?" Kya asked angrily.
"She almost died trying to give you your air ender for decades, and you decided to cheat when you gave up, despite the fact that she gave you the option to find somebody years before that you selfish bastard." Bumi chimed in.
Tenzin froze.
Bolin and Opal's innocent eyes flashed with an emotion nobody had seen on them. They looked like angry hornets.
Pema slowly recalled that Spring all those years ago, and then it all clicked, a piece she always failed to understand.
"No wonder… her hormones and grief must have been through the roof when she attacked temple island." Pemas's normally cheery voice was filled with disgust at Tenzin, remembering how she herself had felt when she had a miscarriage that one time between Meelo and Rohan.
"Don't act innocent," Kya said coldly. "You-you were fine cheating with my brother." Kya tried to ease her anger. Pema was barely an adult when it happened, and she never had ill feelings for her. Kya liked Pema, especially for Tenzin. Her gripe was that the younger woman had decided she wanted to be involved with a man who had been with a woman for most of his life. She couldn't ignore how Tenzin threw Lin away.
"Could you not bring her into this? I chose to agree to try with Pema. That is my responsibility." Tenzin took a breath before continuing, "I had to focus on the- "
"Airbenders, we get it. Too bad you didn't remember your family." Bumi decided to team up with Kya now.
"That still is disgusting. You would treat Lin like that. She would give you everything - her…bending, her life." Pema never knew such a dark side existed in Tenzin.
"No, you don't." Tenzin snapped, feeling tired of being attacked
"Excuse me. You act like it's our fault," Kya snapped back.
"Well, it is. Do you think I had a choice? If either of you had lifted a single finger to help, to be proactive, cared if you had children, it wouldn't matter; it would not have all rested on me! Do you? Do you think I wanted to leave her, especially like that? I can't even look at myself knowing how heartless that was!" Tenzin raised his voice; they never heard Tenzin's voice booming with so much pain. "It hurt me too. Each time a miscarriage happened. That my son died and I wasn't there for him. That it's my fault she drank so much after the stillbirth."
Kya smacked her brother as hard as she could, suggesting his hurt was equal to Lin, she was furious with him. Lin gave everything that a single person could give to her brother; the earthbender loved Tenzin more than she cared about herself.
Asami, Opal, and Bolin quietly felt the pain. It stung. Tenzin had been like a father to them all. Knowing that he could hurt someone like that ached, but they stayed quiet. Asami quietly remembers the spirit world once again; that spirit. He had felt so familiar to her. She didn't know how or why, but it was like Asami was staring at a puzzle that was missing a few pieces that were deeply lodged in her memory
"You still think it's all laid on you and made everyone feel bad about it, and then you went for a girl 20 years younger than you." Bumi crossed his arms, feeling angry at the implication.
"No, you two were selfish, taking your anger out on me and expecting me to take it. Dad was the one who took me on those trips, I didn't have a choice - I didn't choose for him to take me alone to do all of that instead of as a family! You both chose to run away to focus on your self-pity. You could have helped, I was 34 when dad died, and I only had one child."
He didn't notice that his breathing was heavy, and that his eyes were wet and red-rimmed. He couldn't sleep at night whenever he thought about it; the guilt ate him alive on a good day. Even if it gave him the most beautiful gifts in the world, his children the love of his life, it still wretched within him.
"I was the last air bender, and neither of you did anything for Air nomad culture either; you were off roaming the world like you wanted to. You were mad at me because dad didn't share his culture with you when you could have just asked, as his children. I didn't know airbenders would come back at the time. I wouldn't ever leave her-"
Kya looked at her brother, realizing he truly felt remorseful he had failed to suppress a sob. Bumi wondered if this would be better one day. It sounded like a lose, lose for Tenzin back then; Bumi felt like he failed his little brother.
"We should have. I could have done more as Aang's child." Bumi finally said softly.
"I guess we never thought about how we didn't help you not feel like all the burdens fell on you. I just thought about the bending and how I let Dad down." Kya stared at the floor for a second.
Bumi rubbed Tenzin's back as he wondered whether he had ever gotten to cry over his lost child, his lost love. Kya hugged Tenzin gingerly.
Pema approached them
"This year, we all will go, as a family, to honor the baby." Her eyes were red. She realized now what a mess this all was.
Su looked at Opal, feeling heavy, thinking that Bumi may be right about her sister. She never realized how much Lin went through when she left Republic City.
"When I have kids, I'm going to make sure that they all feel connected to both sides, bender or not," Opal said, holding Bolin.
"That's right," Su said quietly, unsure if anyone heard. It was going to be a long night.
