Thursday 14th February 1981
Dumbledore's Office, Hogwarts, 19:00
This was it. This was them having a plan and seeing it through. They were telling Dumbledore their decision about their safety. About going into hiding.
It felt so final already. Like it was set in stone and immovable. James pushed back the doubts that still lurked in the back of his mind. They had to do this. It was really the only thing they could do.
More wards wouldn't make them feel safe, not when Voldemort had proved recently that he could easily take those down. Several Aurors had died in a safe house last week by him doing just that. Aurors that had been friends and he hadn't even been able to attend their funerals.
"Professor," James greeted him politely, Lily echoing him as be pulled out the chair for her to sit down before he sat down himself.
"You do realise that I haven't been your professor of any kind for a good few years now?"
Yes, James was aware of that. But it just felt wrong to be using Dumbledore's surname. There was no way he'd be able to call the man Albus even behind his back, never mind to his face.
"I know, Sir," James said ruefully. "But it's not something you can just turn off."
Dumbledore chuckled and let the subject go for more pressing matters.
"Well, James, Lily, what can I do for you this fine evening."
Lily looked pointedly out the window. It was currently chucking it down outside.
"Well, the weather does not necessarily dictate how well a day is going," he added cheerfully.
James swore that the man was never not cheerful. He didn't know how he did it.
"Of course not," Lily said with a polite smile.
Which was probably better than the weird look James was giving him.
"So, did you require something of me?" He prompted them.
Oh yeah, they were the ones who had called this meeting. Whoops. James and Lily looked at each other, Lily taking a deep breath.
"We want to use to Fidelius Charm," she told him.
He looked inordinately pleased with their decision, which made James feel a lot better. If Dumbledore thought it was a good idea, then kt was a good idea, right?
"So, when can we do it?" James asked.
Once decisions had been made about anything, he always just wanted to get on with it.
It meant less things were forgotten and, you know, they actually did it. Not that they would forget to do something as important as this but still.
"James," Lily said reproachfully.
She probably knew exactly what needed to be done. He'd never seen her do so much research for a single spell before. Merlin, she'd probably be able to tell you it's whole history!
"Sorry," he muttered and leaned backwards in his seat.
He hadn't even realised that he'd been leaning forwards! Dumbledore thankfully gave him an indulgent smile.
"There are a few things you have to do in preparation first," Dumbledore told him with a chuckle, like he was amused at his impatience.
What? It was normal to want to get all this sorted as soon as possible, wasn't it? The quicker they got this done, the safer they were. And James wanted his family to be safe. He didn't want Harry to even have a slim chance at getting hurt.
"Like preparing the boundaries of your house for the spell."
"Like you would for wards?" James interrupted, earning himself another reproachful look from Lily.
"Exactly."
"That's already done," he assured him.
"You are also going to have to choose one person who you trust implicitly to hold the secret."
James was about to say that that was easy but then he thought about it for a second and groaned. He and Lily looked at each other in dismay.
"We have to choose?"
James had been hoping that Dumbledore would choose someone for them. Tell them what to do. This being responsible for absolutely everything in your life was terrifying. They needed guidance. They needed direction.
"Some you trust implicitly," he repeated, pointedly.
Like that made it any easier! James knew that he trusted all the Marauders. And why was it up to them, anyway? Why were they the ones making all the decisions? Yes, he was aware of how ridiculous that sounded but he just wanted to be done with all of this.
When they didn't say anything in regards to an answer, Dumbledore coughed to vet their attention.
"Well, tell me when you have made the decision and I will start to make the preparations."
James looked over who was biting her lip. Now what we're they supposed to do?
Saturday 16th February 1981
Godric's Hollow, 10:00
Lily stared at the test in front of her and then down at her stomach which was glowing a colour she was not entirely sure she wanted to see.
Or maybe she did. She and James had agreed that they didn't eat Harry to be an only child. Because, despite the current state of her relationship with Petunia, Lily had loved growing up with sisters. Most of the time. And James had always wanted a sibling. So, they had planned on having another child. But not now. Not so close in age to Harry.
She thought about it for a moment. The baby would barely be a year younger, maybe a little bit more depending on how far along she was. A year? That was awful close. Like her and Petunia and look how well that turned out.
This wasn't a good thing, was it? Lily didn't know what to think. She had never thought that she was pregnant in the first place!
Oh, sure, she had scoffed and then dismissed Marlene all those weeks ago when she had been sick and her best friend had suggested that she might be pregnant. Because there was no way she could be pregnant so soon after Harry. He wasn't even a year old yet! And sure, she had stopped breastfeeding him a while ago but still. Her periods still weren't back yet, not properly anyway. Apparently, they'd return to somewhat normal after a year so? Maybe? So, there was no way that she could be pregnant. No way at also, she hadn't even checked when Marlene had brought it up. Why should she? It was just a bug. You didn't check if you were pregnant if you had a bug.
"You ready to ask Sirius?" James asked quietly, coming into the room.
Lily jumped at his sudden entrance and looked down at her stomach to make sure that it was no longer glowing. She wasn't even ready to deal with this information herself, never mind tell James. And anyway, today was an important day and she didn't want anything else to distract them from it.
"Yes," she straightened up and smiled at him. "I'm ready."
This was just them going through the motions anyway. Lily didn't think that Sirius would say anything but yes. And James definitely didn't think otherwise. This was Sirius, after all. The man was basically James' brother
Godric's Hollow, 10:30
Sirius opened and closed his mouth several times, no sound coming from him at all. He simply didn't know what words to say. Or what to even think.
Him? The Secret Keeper? For James and Lily? The person who was solely responsible for keeping then safe? For keeping Harry safe? Him? Him?
Maybe he shouldn't be so surprised by this. He and James had ways been extremely close. Oh, sure, they were extremely close to Remus. Then Peter. They were the Marauders, after all. But James and Sirius had always been a bit different, hadn't they? Just that little bit closer. So, James' decision made sense.
But wasn't it Lily's decision as well? She was nodding as James explained everything and asked him so she had to have agreed too. So, they both trusted him that much? Really? That... that was amazing. It was incredible. It made him feel like he was on top of the world. He, Sirius Black, was someone who you could trust. Take that all the naysayers!
Then those thoughts faded to be replaced by another one. A far more important one. Yes, he was James' best friend. They thought of themselves as brothers. O5her people thought of them as brothers. And that was the problem, wasn't it? People knew that. The two of them always had each other's back. They would literally do anything for each other. Anything. Which meant that they'd know that he'd be the one protecting him, that would know something, when the Potters basically disappeared. Which made him a target too.
Which meant...
"I... I can't," he finally said, much to the shock and dismay of the people in front of him.
Two of the most important people in the world to him. Which meant that he had to do what was best for them, not what he wanted to do. Or what they wanted to do, apparently.
"What!" They both exclaimed at the same time.
Something Sirius would normally find hilarious but this really wasn't the time or the place for that right now. He had to explain himself now because he didn't like the way that both of them looked so betrayed.
"Then who are we supposed to ask?" James demanded, a crestfallen expression on his face, not even giving Sirius a chance to explain. Though he wasn't sure how he was supposed to explain all these swirling thoughts.
Sirius bit his lip. That was something he felt like he couldn't give his opinion on. It wasn't his life, right? Even if these two were some of the most important parts of his life. That didn't give him a right to doctat3 something like this. But and Lily were looking at him so pleadingly...
"Remus?"
Another Marauder, that should work, right? They were all brothers. They all trusted each other. It made sense. Even if them using someone else made something twist deep in his gut. Even if it was his own fault.
James shook his head adamantly. "No. He's dealing with the werewolves. That's enough on his plate. I don't want to put him at any more risk than he already is."
Was it wrong for Sirius to feel both disappointed and relieved at that? Remus really was the next best choice, after all. He was strong. He knew how to lay low. James and Lily trusted him. Merlin, Lily had been friends with him before she even started liking the rest of them!
"Not Severus," Lily was saying, taking him out of his thoughts, James must have asked her. "It's most the same as Sirius. Everyone knows that we've been close since before Hogwarts."
Well, if it wasn't going to be him or Severus or even Remus then who was it supposed to be? This was supposed to be about trust and faith and strength.
Sirius let his thoughts falter and frowned. Maybe they were going about this all wrong. What did he and Remus and Severus all have in common? That they were known to be close friends to these too. The closest. Even though Marlene was one of Lily's best friends he knew that she considered Severus and Remus to be closer. They would be her first choices. Like he and Remus would be James'.
They needed someone not like that. Someone unassuming and not as obvious. Someone no one would ever think of...
Godric's Hollow, 12:00
"M-me?" Peter asked in a shaky voice.
Sirius and James and Lily were all standing in front of him with extremely serious looks on their faces and he was just starting ding there like a stammering fool. He felt like he be forgiven for that this one time considering what they'd just asked him! He had barely entered the house after the rather frantic Patronus message and now this?
"Look, Wormtail," James said rubbing the back of his head. "It makes sense, doesn't it?"
"Well, I- I mean. Well-"
"Please, do it, Wormtail," James begged.
James was begging him.
"You can't force him," Lily said quietly but she also sent him an anxious look.
Peter shifted uncomfortably. They weren't really forcing him but they weren't not forcing him as well.
Then the two of them were bickering and he didn't like them bickering but they were doing it over him and he didn't know what to do. Sirius was standing off to the side, very quiet. Which was freaky. This whole situation was freaky. Were they really asking him to be their Secret Keeper? Seriously? Even though he still didn't really know what that meant from the quick and garbled explanation he got from them?
He knew he'd be responsible for their safety, that much was obvious. They wanted him to be responsible for their safety. Their lives.
"I'll do it," he said quietly and all of their heads turned around to look at him.
"What?" James asked.
Peter straightened up, feeling more confident in himself. Yeah, he could do this.
Sunday 17th February 1981
Tonks' Home, 18:00
Tonks bit her lip, trying really hard to not let the tears that had welled up in her eyes fall. She wouldn't cry, she wouldn't. Not in front of Remus anyway. She didn't want tears to be the last thing he remembered of her.
Because he was leaving. He was really leaving. Not her. Oh, no, no, no, no. He wasn't leaving her. They hadn't fought or anything. And a fight would no longer split them up. They were stronger than that now.
No. This was even worse. This was him leaving because he had to go on a stupid mission that was dangerous and stupid and one that they only had like half the information they needed for it which was stupid. And it was dangerous too and he was willingly going into it which was stupid.
Yeah, her feelings on this whole thing were pretty obvious, weren't they? She was pretty sure that these were normal feelings to have. Who really wanted their significant other to leave them for an undetermined amount of time alone with a baby? She certainly didn't!
Remus looked around him, looking nervous.
"I guess it's time," he finally said.
He had spent the afternoon hour faffing around, saying there were a few things that he needed to sort out and then he'd gone around in circles looking for the cloak he wanted to bring even though it was quite obviously under the stairs. It was just him trying to put it off just for a little bit longer. Which Dora appreciated, don't get her wrong. She was glad that she wasn't the only one feeling like this. But also, all this drawing it out was just making it worse.
"Bye," she said brokenly, pressing a kiss to his mouth.
"Goodbye," he said, his voice hoarse as well.
Dora looked away. She knew that if she looked into his eyes all they would do was cry and she didn't want to do that. She couldn't do that. And she was sure that he didn't want to either. She was just going to let him go with a kiss and a smile and a "be careful". It was as easy as that. She could do that.
Though, already she wasn't doing a good job. Great. Just great. This, this was a lot harder than it looked.
"Bababa-byeee!" Teddy squealed, reaching his little chubby hands out for his daddy.
He had started saying little words in the last few weeks. Well, Dora maintained that they were words. Definitely 'mama'. He tried 'dada' but it came out more like 'dababada' more often than not, like he didn't know how to stop, but Remus said it counted and was inordinately pleased when Teddy looked at him and said it. Privately, Tonks was worried that Teddy didn't have enough words in his vocabulary for his age. He was two months shy of being one, surely, he should have more words than he did?
"Bye, Teddy," Remus said, reaching out for him, shaking Tonks from her thoughts.
She handed Teddy over, who had no clue that his daddy was going to be vanishing for Merlin knows how long and tried to lick Remus' face. It was his new trick, something she blamed Sirius for. He was the dog, after all.
Why was she even thinking like this? That wasn't important right now. What was important that Remus was getting a proper send off.
"You come back," she said fiercely. "You hear me? You have to come back."
Monday 18th February, 12:00
They were really doing it. Him. Lily. Dumbledore. Peter. They were all here. Ready and waiting. James felt like he hadn't breathed all day.
And now he and Lily were standing on either side of Peter, six feet apart from him, with Dumbledore off to the side, chanting the incantation. James swore that he saw the man frown at Peter but it was gone the next time he looked. Anyway, it didn't matter because he wasn't going to change his mind about Peter. He wasn't. It was too late now, anyway, what with them being in the middle of the Fidelius Charm being cast.
It was a weird charm, it made it feel like something was getting pulled out of him yet engulfing him all at once. He didn't like it. It was uncomfortable bordering on painful.
But before he could speak up, though he didn't know what he would say, the incantation was complete. Dumbledore fell silent and lowered his still glowing wand. None of them spoke a word as the magic settled. James swore that he felt it settle heavily on them.
Peter was trembling and James wasn't sure if it was because of the intensity of the magic or his nerves. He never had grown out of his natural nervous tendencies. You'd think that he would have got a bit more confidence in himself but James could have sworn that in the last year Peter' confidence had actually deteriorated.
The magic was still doing something, growing and growing and growing and... it was gone. It all kind of disappeared. Left them.
Huh. Was that it? James looked around in confusion. Had it worked? Had kt happened? What exactly had happened? Lily was looking a little pale and shaky so he went over to hold her.
"Did it work?" She asked anxiously. "Is that it?"
Dumbledore looked at them solely before breaking out into a smile.
"It worked. Try thinking about your home."
James frowned in thought, trying to think of the address that he knew that he knew. Except... he didn't. The thought kept slipping away from him. Like it was dangling just out of reach.
"It worked," Lily breathed.
Auror Office, 12:30
Kingsley looked over to his partner - his new partner - and frowned. Sirius was staring off into the distance again. He'd been doing that a lot today. He was completely distracted. Kt was a good thing that Moody had put them on office duty again, tracking duty really (which entailed them recording all known sightings of Death Eaters on a massive map) because there would be no way that Sirius would be of any good in the field. In fact, he would be a danger. To himself and everyone else around him.
Today, anyway. He was completely distracted and didn't seem to k pw what he was doing half the time. He had missed his mouth three times when he tried to drink his cup of tea this morning!
"You, okay?" Kingsley asked.
Sirius jumped as if he had been startled, despite him having been looking straight at Kingsley.
"What? Huh? Yeah, everything's fine."
Kingsley didn't look like he believed him but he didn't ask any more questions. It wasn't up to him to pry anyway and he had more important and urgent things to be doing like finding yet another report that he'd somehow managed to lose to his desk. This was really becoming an annoying habit. He actually took everything off his desk and dumped it on the floor with the intention of putting all back only neater. With any luck the report would reappear.
Then suddenly Sirius stiffened, his eyes widening. Kingsley couldn't help but tense and scan the area for threats, despite it being the office. But there was no one there. Yeah, everything definitely wasn't fine.
"It's done," Kingsley thought he heard him say but that didn't make any sense at all.
Sirius hadn't been doing anything. What was done? His report? Was he finally fed up with work? With the Auror Force? With the war? Was this him throwing in the towel.
But then Sirius shrugged and turned back to Kingsley as if nothing had happened.
"Hey, do you have that confession on Ellingham?"
Kingsley blinked at him, confused at the quick subject change.
"Um, yeah. Somewhere." He gestured at the chaos that was his desk and the floor around his desk.
No matter how hard he tried to tidy it, within minutes (or, so it seemed) it ended up like this again. A complete mess.
Sirius held his hand out for it. "I may as well see if I can get some work done today."
