((Thanks for the patience on this one! I was busy with my job and working on my gift for the bokumono exchange. I promise I'm not going anywhere! I still have a TON of story to tell :) I'll admit this chap is a lil lengthy, but I hope you all enjoy the fun~ PT 2 is already underway, so the next update shouldn't be as delayed as this last one was. I appreciate those of you still reading along! :-) ))
"What did I say about moping?"
"Huh?" The question returned my awareness to the world around me. Ann sat next to me at the table, snapping her fingers at my face as the other hand held a mangled pizza crust. Karen sat with an empty plate just on the other side; her attention also fixed on me.
"You've been here for... maybe an hour and have said less than three words," Ann said accusingly, eyeing me up and down.
I gave the rest of the empty shack a quick scan, unaware of how long I'd been zoned out. "Okay? It's fuckin' hot." The closest air conditioning output was whirling directly behind me, but that didn't help in the slightest.
As always, the heat wasn't exactly a welcome guest. While I'm sure Kai and the rest of the town enjoyed the sunshine for the last few days of summer, I couldn't stand it. The heat just made everything harder, especially things that hadn't exactly been easy in the first place, like work and sleep.
Sleep was a nice way of putting it, considering I wasn't getting much of it. With alcohol, I was waking up in the middle of the night, fearing for my life. Without it, I was tossing and turning the entire time, dwelling on my problems and longing for sleep that lasted longer than two hours. I still wasn't convinced which was worse, but the last two sleepless nights left me desperate enough to risk drinking in hopes of any sleep at all.
The only benefit to not sleeping was being too tired to get into it with my grandpa. He saw it as 'fixing my attitude,' when in reality, I was just too exhausted to have one at all. What little energy I did have was devoted to work, and that seemed to get him off my back. Well, that and exaggerating how well my last conversation with Claire had gone.
While telling him that we'd talked and would "figure things out after the appointment" wasn't exactly a lie, it sure as shit wasn't the truth either. I just needed time to figure out what the hell I was going to do next. I knew I needed to be patient, but fuck, it was wearing thin.
"Then what's your excuse for your face?" Ann pointed a finger at me, circling my head with a grin before finishing off what remained of her pizza.
"The fuck are you talkin' about?" I stiffened in my seat as I glanced between her and Karen. "This is just what my face looks like."
"Yeah, Gray's just got a serious case of resting bitch face. It's not his fault," Karen supplied with a laugh, Ann eventually joining in before I could protest.
"Either way," Ann said after regaining her composure, "you should be enjoying yourself! It's the last day of summer!" She looked between me and the metal disk sitting on the table in front of us. "Do you want this last slice of pizza?"
"I'm good."
Ann's brows furrowed as she tilted her head. "Okay… well, you didn't eat breakfast. Are you sure you don't want something in your system?" With each passing second that I didn't reach for the plate, she pushed it towards me more aggressively. "I think you should eat it. Maybe you're just hangry."
I reluctantly gave in, reaching for the slice and bringing it up to take a bite. Before I could follow through, a tight squeeze on the back my neck caused me to drop the pizza on the plate below almost as quickly.
"And he probably just needs a drink, amirite?" Kai chimed in. "Lunch rush finally slowed, Popuri's taking Lillia home. Figured now was a good time for a shift beer. Whatcha think, Gray? Karen? Ann? I have tons of beer that needs to be drank."
Karen accepted a millisecond after the offer left Kai's mouth, and Ann declined, to no surprise. I tried to ignore the look Ann gave me as I agreed, but her eyes seemed to pierce right through the side of my face.
When Kai left to grab drinks, I finally met her disapproving look. "What? It's one fuckin' beer. That won't even buzz me."
"I didn't say anything," Ann replied in a tone that said it all.
"Didn't have to." I grabbed the slice of pizza again and took an exaggerated bite. "I'm eatin' your damn pizza, so can you hop off already?"
Ann shook her head, a classic eye-roll paired with it. "I see you've been practicing being nice," she retorted sarcastically, kicking the leg of my chair. "And don't talk to me with your mouth full like that. It's gross."
After finishing the slice, I turned back to Ann with a huff. "Thanks for the food," I tried to sound thankful, but I was stressing over my intonation. Did I even sound genuine?
"That's... better," Ann sighed, verging on a chuckle at my attempt to be appreciative.
Chair legs screeched along the floor as Kai took a seat on my other side. He placed a can in front of me and then slid one across the table to Karen with a wink.
"I feel like a cheers is in order?" Kai said proudly, opening the can and holding it up towards the middle of the table with one smooth motion.
"Well, duh!" Karen agreed, following Kai's lead.
They both looked over to me expectantly, and I copied their behavior, albeit with much less enthusiasm. Honestly, I'd missed alcohol over the past couple of days, which felt pathetic to admit, but not enough so to make a fucking spectacle about it.
"To another summer of fun in the books! And the many more to come!" Kai cheered with his signature grin. Karen and Kai sandwiched my can and then threw their heads back to drink.
As I finished my sip and returned it to the table, I noticed that Kai and Karen still had their eyes locked as they chugged their beers. Of course, drinking would turn into a competition between them.
The hollow aluminum rang as Kai slammed his can on the table first. "Ha, nice try, Kare, but you gotta be quicker than that."
A few seconds later, Karen's can was sent to the table with a similar clang as she smirked in Kai's direction. "'Kay, so maybe you have the speed, but we both know I have the endurance."
I wanted to shake my head, but a thud followed by a discrete "ow-uh" from Karen pulled me to Ann as she angrily whispered at her friend.
"Yeah, right," Kai continued, oblivious to Ann's disapproval of their blatant flirting. "We both know I have the endurance."
"Can you two do this bullshit anywhere else?" I groaned, already tired of listening to them go at it.
"Yeesh, cool it, you two," Karen chided, looking between Ann and me with a groan. "We're just joking. It's friendly banter." She focused her sights on me, "You would know if you were actually friendly."
Kai made no attempt to hold back his snickers as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders. "Gray's just sad because this is our last day to play before I head out tomorrow." He looked up at me with a pout. "Am I not giving you enough attention, sweetheart?"
"Fuck off," I mumbled, shrugging off his arm.
"Well, that, and he's still all bent out of shape about Claire." He gave my arm a few ginger pats. "Huh, buddy?"
"Goddess, I had no idea it was that bad," Karen cut me off before I could even reply.
Ann let out a sigh from my side. "It's that bad."
"I'm not all 'bent outta shape' cuz of Claire," I attempted to defend myself, though I wasn't even sure if it was a lie or not. A lot of things had been bending me out of shape lately; Claire was just a key player.
"Oh," Karen's voice went up an entire octave as she shot Kai a roguish look before settling on me. "So... you wouldn't care if she's coming or not?"
I couldn't deny the way my heart skipped a beat at that sentence. "Is she?"
"This guy." Kai shook his head with a chuckle. He looked across the table to Karen. "It was going to be a surprise… but Karen and I may have conspired to make it happen for you."
"You're welcome, by the way," Karen sat back in her chair and let out a sigh. "Convincing her to come was no easy feat, and my dad's probably gonna get pissed, but seems like it's worked so far."
"Wait, what?" Ann asked before I could get the words out. "Last time I brought it up, Claire said she wasn't coming…" She flashed a glare between Kai and Karen, "What did you two do?"
"Ha, wouldn't you like to know," Karen answered mischievously, she and Kai sharing a devious grin.
I wasn't sure if I did want to know.
"Well… actually, you will know in a little bit, I guess. I think she and Rick should be here in a few." Karen met Kai's gaze across the table, "We just have to make sure your guy shows up."
'Your guy?' What the fuck does that mean?
Before I could even reply with my own surprise, Ann was making a series of confused faces in Karen's direction. "I just... I guess I don't know what you could have said to get her to change her mind."
"Seems I just know our dear Claire a little bit better than you do," Karen teased as she tapped Ann on the nose with her index finger.
Ann held her tongue, but I could tell by the way that she pressed her lips together that she was not happy with Karen's remark. She and I both knew that couldn't be further from the truth.
Kai pushed up from his spot, gathering his and Karen's empty cans as he walked back to the counter. "Yeah, don't worry about my end. You know I always come through," he called back to our table.
I took a long sip of beer, trying to push down the worries that I might be sabotaging any hopes of a good night's sleep. At this point, I was desperate to feel anything other than tired and lost. Drunk and numb seemed like a suitable replacement.
"But speaking of, they should be here soon too," Kai continued as he made it back to our table. He slid behind my chair, gripping the back of it and shaking. "Wanna go wait outside? I've been cooped up here all morning. I could use a quick dip."
The ocean was the last place I wanted to be, but as Karen and Ann pushed up in response, I realized I didn't have a choice.
Beer in hand, I followed the group outside to a nearly empty beach. A few open umbrellas and packed trash cans seemed to be the only evidence that people had been coming and going all day. Somehow Kaipalooza had become some sort of unofficial town holiday, but of course, Gramps didn't recognize it as one. Coming after work allowed me to miss most of the midday rush. And most importantly, I'd just barely avoided running into Manna and Sasha as they were leaving the beach—a win in my book.
Kai immediately took off into a sprint towards the dock as we stepped into the sand. He effortlessly removed his shirt and bandana, transitioning into a cannonball as he reached the end.
Karen and Ann exchanged glances, eventually shedding their clothes by a blanket and jumping into the water beyond the dock just as Kai had done before. The trio splashed around, swimming in no particular patterns as they playfully shouted at each other.
The glimmering waters looked like an oasis… but it also unlocked an unexpected sense of dread. I used to tolerate swimming, but the thought of it now made my stomach turn.
"You coming or what?" Kai shouted from the water, waving his hands dramatically over his head.
It was too far to yell back an argument. Reluctantly, I trudged through the sand and kicked off my shoes by the shore. The lapping coast met my bare feet, but I didn't dare take another step into the ocean. Cold water on my toes was refreshing enough.
"Are you really going to make me come get you?" Kai called with a laugh, doing some sort of combination of swimming and jumping towards me until he was able to reach the ground.
"Don't," I warned him.
He continued in my direction until his shorts were dripping on my feet. "Fine," he moaned in mock-exasperation. "I won't make you get in… but I will make you wet."
Before I could even shudder at the innuendo, Kai wrapped me in a sopping wet bear hug, fighting every bit of my resistance. Eventually, I pushed him off, but a soaking wet imprint of his body remained on my clothes. I was, once again, frustrated by my roommate's lack of boundaries… though I didn't want to admit that moisture felt nice.
"Come on, doesn't that feel good?" Kai joked as Ann and Karen swam in the distance.
I looked down at the damp blob overtaking the front of my tank. "It's fine."
"Alright, seriously," Kai took a step closer, his voice lowering, "what's up with you? I know you're not this butthurt over a girl."
"Got a lot on my mind, that's all."
"Well, the only thing that should be on your mind is letting loose and having fun! That's the Kaipalooza motto." When I shook my head in response, he let out a sigh and placed his wet hands on my shoulders. "Come on, Gray, you don't want my last memory of you before I leave to be you moping, do you?"
"I mean… no?" Every year Kai acted like it would be the last time he would ever see me again.
He snaked an arm around me and started ushering me towards the shack, "Okay, then let's get you just a little bit looser."
I anchored my heels in the sand to stop us and glanced over my shoulder to Ann and Karen. "What did you have in mind?"
"A bottle of tequila that needs to be finished off before tomorrow," he said slyly.
"You and that fuckin' tequila," I grumbled, my eyes unconsciously floating back to Ann. "Kai… I dunno."
"You… dunno? What do you mean?"
"I told Ann I would stop drinking as much."
"Okay? Well, you're already drinking," Kai pointed out, motioning to the nearly empty can in my hand. "Come on! We'll just take one shot! Real quick. What she doesn't know won't hurt her, right?"
I peeked over my shoulder before returning to Kai. "She's gonna know."
"How would she know? Are you planning on announcing it?"
"No, but—"
"Then how would she know?"
"She just will!"
"It's my last day," Kai pouted. "Come on, please ?"
"...Fine." I wanted him to stop pestering me about it, but I couldn't help wondering if one shot was all that bad.
Kai smirked and looked around the beach one last time before directing me inside the shack, recovering his discarded clothes on the way. As he swiftly poured two shots on the counter, my heart was pounding. I'd taken shots with Kai in the same spot more times than I could count over the past few years... Why did it feel so wrong now?
As both of our empty shot glasses slammed on the counter, I winced, and Kai wasted no time hiding any evidence of what we'd been doing. I chased down the taste with what little remained of my beer, hoping that would be a good enough cover.
"Alright, sneaky," Kai said with a pat on my back after cleaning the counter. "Let's get back out there before they start asking questions." He had a point, so I followed him out of the shack in my worst attempt at acting natural.
The door slammed behind, and I noticed Karen and Ann approaching us from the blanket where they'd discarded their clothes. Kai gave the girls a nod as we walked down the steps, and I debated doing the same thing, eventually deciding against it.
"We were wondering where you two went," Karen greeted us, though it seemed directed at Kai more than me.
I glanced over to Ann and was met with an icy stare, immediately making me wish I'd never even looked. My hand reached for my hat as I looked away, hoping I could pretend we'd never locked eyes.
"Oh, yeah," Kai answered nonchalantly, clapping me on the back, "I needed Gray's help moving some boxes for later." He was an impressively smooth talker, and maybe that shit worked on Karen, but I doubted it would on Ann.
"Really?" Ann asked, narrowed eyes darting between Kai and me. "That's what you two were doing?" It definitely didn't work on Ann.
Fuck. She knows.
Ann locked her sights on me and opened her mouth to speak when Kai caught everyone's attention by dramatically clearing his throat. "Ladies... and Gray, the moment you've been waiting for."
Puzzled, I looked over to Kai, who just nodded his head towards Rose Square. When I followed his direction, I noticed Rick stomping down the stairs to the beach. A familiar blonde ponytail bobbed a few yards after him, though its energy didn't quite match the rigid look on Claire's face. Somebody clearly was not thrilled about a trip to the beach. Or maybe it was the prospect of seeing me.
Rick stopped in the sand a few steps in front of the stairs to shout something back at Claire. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but neither seemed excited in any capacity. When Claire's slow, reluctant steps caught up to him, Rick and her went back and forth—I'm sure about who wanted to be there the least.
Truthfully my attention was devoted to deciphering Claire's body language, trying to get a sense of her mood. But when I caught myself tracing the tanned skin of her leg up to the hem of her shorts, I had to physically redirect my attention back to the conversation in front of me.
"That doesn't bother you?" Kai raised an eyebrow at Karen. "Rick and Claire being all buddy-buddy like that?"
For some reason, the thought kind of bothered me now that he'd mentioned it.
"Eh, not anymore," Karen dismissed the idea with a wave of her hand. "Honestly, I didn't even really like Claire that much at first, and it didn't help that she and Rick were so tight."
It seemed I wasn't the only one that had come around to Claire. Karen had undoubtedly made her initial distaste for Claire a secret, though. I would've had no idea otherwise…. But again, what the hell did I know about girls?
She let out a surprising laugh as she continued, "But Rick's just a perpetual big brother. And like, you should hear what they talk about, it's almost exclusively choring and coop dynamics." Karen shook her head and nodded towards the pair. "If he wants to get all that chicken shit out on her, be my guest. I don't wanna listen to that."
"Fair enough," Kai laughed from my side.
"I'm gonna go talk to her," Ann decided out loud, sauntering over to Claire and Rick before any of us could say something.
"You're not gonna go with?" I asked, noticing Karen still between Kai and me.
"No… I'm gonna let her get Claire all warmed up before I bring the fun," Karen absently replied, her eyes especially interested in watching Ann walk away.
When Ann was greeting the pair and out of earshot, Karen promptly turned back to me with a purpose. "'Kay, listen, you gotta tell me, I've been dying to know," she started, quickly looking around to make sure nobody else was listening. "What's Claire like in bed?"
Kai erupted into a chorus of laughter as my skin blazed, and I knew it wasn't a product of the sun. I brought my hand to my temples, "W-why would you be dyin' to know that? That's fuckin' weird."
Karen shrugged, moving her gaze to where I assumed Claire was standing. "I mean, for starters, just look at her."
It was easier if I didn't.
"Right?" Kai agreed.
"And also, like..." Karen continued, to my extreme displeasure, "she's given me some pretty, uh, life-altering advice in that department. Plus, some of the stories she's told me... I can't help my curiosity."
I didn't even want to think about the implications of that statement… but I was anyway.
"Life-altering?" Kai questioned flirtatiously. "What kind of advice does that entail? Please do tell."
"Nothing I'm sure you wouldn't know," she bantered back.
The two of them together sometimes…
Karen kicked sand in my direction and raised an eyebrow. "So are you gonna tell me, or do I have to get you drunk again?"
Kai let out an exasperated sigh, "Sorry to burst your bubble, Kare, but I've already tried, and he's sealed shut."
"Come on!" Karen exclaimed, pushing my arm. "What? You don't kiss and tell or something?"
"No, claims he 'doesn't remember,' " Kai answered for me in what I assumed was his poor imitation of my voice.
Karen turned back to me with a glare. "That's so lame, seriously, Gray?"
"Personally, I don't believe him," Kai said to Karen like I wasn't there. "But it must have been something if he's this whipped over her."
"That's what I'm saying!"
Fuck. I could imagine how even more pathetic I looked to anyone who didn't know the full extent of Claire and my situation. Still, I definitely wasn't about to tell either of them the truth.
My brain was doing mental fucking gymnastics, trying to find a way to end the conversation. Rick graced me with an exit as he approached our spot in the sand, pulling the two from their discussion about my sex life.
Rick let out a deep exhale as he reached Karen, wrapping her in a hug and resting his head against hers. "I love you, but please don't ever make me do that again."
"Bringing Claire?" Karen laughed in response, draping her arms around Rick's chest. "Was it really that bad?"
"I had to convince her to stop working three separate times. And even then… the walk here was brutal." He pinched his nose right under the bridge of his glasses. "I swear she's more stubborn than Popuri."
"Yeesh, well, now you know what it's like for me," Karen lamented, rolling her eyes. "She's as stubborn as you then, huh?"
Rick smirked at her comment but didn't say anything. He seemed to finally take in Kai and me as he nodded in my direction. "Gray, how're you?"
"Fine," I answered with a shrug. "You?"
"Oh, not so bad." Rick glanced over to Kai, and his face soured on sight. "Kai."
"Nice to see you too, Rick," Kai responded with a sarcastic edge, a fake smile plastered on his face. "I'm so happy you could make it."
Rick narrowed his eyes. "Wouldn't miss it."
"Wow, you're just too sweet. I think I'm gonna miss you most," he said with a wink before lowering his voice to a mock-whisper, "just don't tell your sister."
Rick appeared to be loading up for some sort of rebuttal when Karen's hand cupped his cheek and directed his face toward hers.
"Why don't we go for a swim?" she sang in an unfamiliar sweet voice reserved exclusively for Rick. "I bet it'd feel amazing after working yourself to death in the heat all morning."
He reluctantly agreed after shooting a glare in Kai's direction, and Kai rolled his eyes as the couple walked towards the shore.
"I don't know why she's even with that guy sometimes," Kai groaned.
"Not sure why you care," I mindlessly offered, my eyes finally giving in to the sight I'd been denying them.
Claire's apparent ease around Ann was a sharp contrast from earlier. The two were sharing a hug, though Claire looked like she might squeeze the air right out of her friend. Her mouth seemed to move a mile a minute into Ann's ear—too fast and too far away for me to make out. I couldn't see Ann's face but hoped she was getting an apology.
"Yeah, whatever," Kai retorted, pulling my attention away from the embrace. Something about his attitude was starting to piss me off.
I turned back to Kai with a cocked eyebrow. "Don't think I didn't see you two flirtin' up a fuckin' storm, the hell is that all about?"
"Calm down. It's all harmless. You know Karen and I are just friends," Kai tried to assure me. His confidence was unwavering, but he seemed to forget that I knew their history. "Plus, I flirt with everyone, including you. Popuri doesn't care. She knows it's all for shits and giggles."
All I could do was shake my head. "I don't get you."
Kai didn't respond. Instead, he started rapidly hitting my arm, and I could tell he wanted me to look at something—I just prayed that it wasn't Claire. He motioned at the dock, the opposite direction of Claire, and I let out an unintentional sigh of relief.
A small silver dinghy floated at the end of the pier, four unfamiliar faces packed in like a can of sardines. A blonde bowl cut hopped off, one sandaled foot lazily holding the side of the boat close as he fumbled with the dock line. After a painfully long minute passed with no success, a larger guy with dark curly hair climbed onto the dock after him and snatched the rope from his hand before turning to secure the boat.
When I looked back to what seemed like half an aluminum can with a motor, I realized the two faces remaining in the boat were not all that unfamiliar. I vaguely remembered the two girls from Kai's party, though I couldn't remember either of their names for the life of me. The two guys were the ones that I'd never seen before, but I assumed one of them had to be 'Kai's guy.' Whatever that meant.
The first guy surveyed the beach as the second helped both girls onto the dock, and Kai waved the group over.
I turned to my roommate, already dreading the inevitable social interaction. "Who are all these people?"
"Well you know Muffy and Jill," Kai started without looking at me, motioning towards the group as they made their way through the sand. "The goofy blonde one's Rock, and…" he trailed off, fixed on the fourth member of the group. "Ha, fuck. I remember him from the bar, but I don't remember his name… uh, Marcus? Marvin? I don't know, I knew Karen had somebody coming with them, but I didn't know it was him."
When I gave the last guy a second look, he did seem out of place among the group. The rest of his companions looked ready for a day at the beach, dressed in swimsuits, tank tops, shorts. His button-down and jeans looked more suited for choring on a farm. The scowl on his face made it seem like he'd rather be working, or really anywhere else than the beach. Part of me sort of related to that feeling.
Before I could inquire more about Karen's reasons for interfering with people from Forget-Me-Not, Kai was greeting the blonde. "Rock, I'm glad you all could make it!" he said, giving him some sort of handshake hug hybrid. "Thanks for bringing everyone."
"Hey, man!" Rock responded with the cadence of somebody that'd just faced a few blunts to himself. "And I mean, Mom said I had to, but I'm super stoked to be here!" He looked around the beach, his eyes searching the various groups playing in the water.
"Yeah, well, tell Lou she's doing me a huge favor," Kai smiled, patting Rock on the arm. "I'm probably closing around six or so today, so we can load up all the leftovers after that, yeah? You don't mind staying for a few hours?"
Rock didn't look away from the beach to respond, "Oh, yeah. Most definitely."
I looked over my shoulder to see what had caught Rock's attention. Ann and Claire walked along the shoreline in their swimsuits, stopping every few steps to pick things out of the sand, and the realization sunk in. I knew how he was looking at the two of them, and I didn't even care which one he was checking out; I instantly hated him.
"Rock!" one of the girls scolded him, sending the back of her fist into his arm. Blonde curls shrouded her face as she pulled him closer to whisper in his ear. I was just glad I wasn't the one that had to do something about his fucking staring problem.
He nervously laughed as he snapped back to the group, "Ha, sorry 'bout that. Yeah, no worries. We can stay."
Kai and I exchanged very different looks—mine of annoyance, his of amusement—before returning to the group. "Ah, well, everybody, this is my best friend, Gray. Gray, everybody."
It was the world's least helpful introduction, and despite wanting to turn and walk away, I sucked it up for Kai's sake. I tried to give the group a nod, not sure how to simultaneously greet four people. "Yo."
"Hi Gray," the blonde girl sang with a wave, making me feel guilty for not remembering her name. "It's Muffy. Remember, we met—"
"I'm Rock, nice to meet ya, man," he interrupted, taking a step towards me with an outstretched hand. I reluctantly snatched it, but his loose, sweaty shake instantly made me wish I hadn't. "Ooh, strong grip," Rock laughed, shaking out his hand as he returned it to his side.
Unconsciously, I looked over to the last guy, who seemed utterly disinterested in the whole affair. He was examining the beach when he noticed me looking and offered the slightest nod in acknowledgment. "Marlin," he said in a tone that matched the enthusiasm on his face.
I mirrored the action, thankful that I didn't have to suffer through another awful handshake.
Marlin turned to Kai, "Lookin' for Karen."
"Oh, yeah, for sure," Kai replied, craning his head to scan the beach. "She's... the brunette over there on the blue blanket... next to that lanky dude." He laughed at his own dig at Rick, but Marlin didn't react.
"Thanks," he muttered before trudging through the sand towards the couple.
"Well, what do you say we get this party started, yeah?" Kai returned to the remaining group with enthusiasm. "I have a ton of booze we need to get through before tomorrow."
Rock snaked his arms around Muffy and Jill. "Let's do it!" he cheered as both of the girls attempted to wriggle out of his grip.
I nervously looked back at Ann and Claire, who'd made it to the complete opposite side of the beach. There's no way Ann would notice that I was gone, so I followed the group as they made their way to Kai's shack.
We congregated around the counter as Kai prepared another round of shots. Muffy and her friend leaned on the bar next to me as we waited, periodically looking up at me like she wanted to say something. Rock seemed to be in another world as he wandered around the dining room, gawking in no particular direction.
"He's always like this if that's what you're wondering," Muffy said out of the blue.
I looked down at her. "Huh?"
"Rock. He's… an interesting one," she laughed, twirling a curl around her finger. "But he has a boat, so…" Her friend on the other side let out a chuckle and shook her head.
"Got it." I wasn't exactly sure what she wanted me to say to that. That motorized tin can must have been his only redeeming quality. I wasn't a fan of the guy, but I didn't particularly care.
"Yeah, honestly, it's slim pickings in the valley," she sighed before looking up at me with a coy smile. "Not like here in Mineral Town."
Was that her attempt at flirting with me? Or was she just trying to make conversation?
Clinking shot glasses in front of us blessed me with an excuse not to reply. I eagerly grabbed the glass as it was set down, not wanting to give an opening for the conversation to start back up.
Muffy reached for two of the glasses, passing one to Jill, who didn't seem interested in receiving it. Kai joined us as he leaned against the counter and held up his shot glass. One lonely leftover shot of tequila seemed to catch everyone's eyes, and heads turned towards Rock, wandering on the other side of the shack.
"Rock!" Muffy yelled over her shoulder, snapping him out of his daze. He wasted an absurd amount of time moseying from the front of the shop, and Muffy turned to her friend, whispering under her breath, "I swear one of these days, I might actually kill him."
In the least climactic series of events, Rock finally joined us at the counter, and we took the shot. Kai made us cheers to some combination of himself and summer, but I wasn't listening. I was just eager to distance myself from the world's most awkward assembly of humans.
Kai turned to the group, "So who's hungry?" He started rattling off items on his menu, and I made my leave. I wasn't sure where I was going to go, but I knew I wanted to leave.
The door rang open before I could get my hand on the knob. Popuri pushed through first like she owned the place, and I was surprised to see Ann come through the doorway behind her. Ann didn't look mad, but my stomach sank seeing her either way.
"Hi, Gray!" Popuri greeted me warmly, giving a wave and skipping away before I could even respond. She made a bee-line behind the counter, wrapping her arms around Kai. He returned the embrace, and the two went back and forth in a low tone, smiling faces only inches apart. I had to look away; something about seeing Kai so sappy made me want to vomit.
"Don't tell me you're jealous of Popuri," Ann laughed from my side.
A scoff left my mouth. "Yeah, right." I looked back at the couple, "Just weird seeing Kai like that sometimes."
"Yeah." Ann shoved her hands in her overall's pockets, looking at the same sight before returning to me, "You got that one right."
Part of me was surprised to see Ann without Claire, and I hated to admit it, but I was curious what they'd been doing. "So, uh, you havin' fun out there?"
"Definitely! Just, Karen had some... seed guy she promised to introduce Claire to, so I thought I'd come find you."
"Well?" Did she want to get on me for drinking? She didn't look like she was mad, but I couldn't help expecting the worst.
She took a step closer, "Well, um. I'm still kinda surprised Karen was able to get Claire to come… but she seems like she's in a good mood now." Ann rocked on her feet, eyes periodically shifting between the window and me. "I was just thinking… and you can tell me if I'm overstepping, but like, if you wanted to try and talk to her… now might be a good time."
"Oh." That wasn't what I'd expected her to say. "Uh, no, you're fine. I…" I took a deep breath, trying to force myself to not sound like an asshole. "I appreciate your help, Ann. Not sure what I'd do without you, honestly."
Ann's eyes widened for an instant, then relaxed with a laugh. "Yeah, I'd rather not think about it," she teased before pointing a finger at me. "But remember! Apologize! And be nice! You're already doing so much better from this morning."
I sighed. "Thanks…"
"And we should cool it on the drinking," she tilted her head down, shooting me a look that said she knew what I'd been doing.
"I only—"
"Gray, I'm not your mom. I'm not gonna tell you how to live your life," Ann said sternly, crossing her arms over her chest. "All I'm saying is there's such a thing as moderation. So maybe you just… don't for the rest of the day? Or at least for a while?"
I was already feeling a slight buzz coming on, so that seemed like a deal I could at least try to make. "Fine. I'll try."
"And it probably doesn't help that all you've eaten today is a slice of pizza!" Ann said with a smile. "Wanna grab a bite?"
I couldn't help but laugh. "I watched you eat that entire pizza to yourself. How are you still hungry?"
Ann didn't acknowledge my jab and looked over her shoulder out the window. "I feel kind of bad that I didn't ask Claire if she wanted anything, but…"
My eyes followed Ann's out the window, settling on Claire, Karen, and Marlin as the three stood on the beach. I figured Marlin was the seed guy, but the conversation seemed pretty damn lively for something a simple as fucking seeds.
Even from that far away, I could tell that Claire was beaming with that boundless excitement. It wasn't surprising; I wouldn't put it past her to be pumped about seeds of all things. The way Marlin cracked his stoic expression with a crooked smile as he listened to Claire… that was surprising. Along with some other choice adjectives…
"Gray?" Ann called from my side, shaking me out of the dark place I'd been headed. Her hand on my arm made me release the fist I'd unintentionally clenched. She looked out the window and then back at me, "Goddess, you're ridiculous. Let's go."
Before I could reply, Ann pulled me towards the counter, back to the same place I'd run away from earlier. The valley group was still gathered nearby as Kai noisily prepared their food in the back. Ann approached Popuri's station in front of the register, musing as if she didn't know the entire menu like the back of her hand.
"Hmmm… honestly, a snow cone sounds amazing right now.." she pondered to nobody in particular. Popuri agreed with excitement, and Ann turned to me with a smile. "You should probably get something with a little more substance, though."
I already knew what I wanted, but I figured now was a better time than ever to practice being nice. "Just uh, get whatever you want. I got you."
"You mean it?"
"Why would I lie?"
"Well, okay! You will regret this," she joked. Ann turned back to Popuri with wide eyes, clasping her hands together. "Okay, well, in that case, let's do two snow cones… oooh, and the grilled pineapple one, hmmm… let's see, and…" she continued rambling off a few more items that didn't mesh together. I didn't even realize I'd been smiling until my mouth felt tight.
I didn't care about the impending damage she'd inflict on my wallet. After everything I'd put Ann through, I just wanted to see her happy.
"And then whatever Gray's getting!" she finished, her and Popuri turning their attention to me.
"Oh. Uh, baked corn." Before Popuri could return with a total, my mouth was moving with a mind of its own. "Two, actually."
"Hungry?" Ann pushed my arm with a laugh.
"Uh, no. Well, kinda. But the other one's for Claire."
Ann blinked a few times before cracking a smirk. "Interesting choice." I wasn't sure what made the choice interesting. Who wouldn't want baked corn?
"Okey dokey," Popuri said brightly, reading through the random assortment of food Ann and I had ordered. When she gave me the total, I pulled out my wallet and paid without a word.
Popuri grabbed the ticket from the counter and carried it back to Kai. Amidst the kitchen's chaos, Kai stopped on a dime to take the paper and steal a quick kiss from Popuri. He seamlessly transitioned back into his cooking as Popuri returned with a smile. "It should be ready in a few, you two. Just hang tight, okay?"
We took a few steps away from the register, and I leaned my back against the counter. Popuri ran by to deliver a few snow cones to the valley group at the other end of the counter, and I noticed Ann watching the interaction with a raised eyebrow.
"Jeez Pop, can't believe Kai's putting you to work like this," Ann teased Popuri on her way back to the register.
Popuri stopped in front of Ann and opened her mouth when Kai called over his shoulder, cutting her off, "Hey! I'm not making her do anything." He turned back to the stove but continued to casually defend himself, "I've told her multiple times that she doesn't have to help—"
"But I want to help!" Popuri corrected, though I wasn't sure if it was directed toward Ann or Kai. "I like being able to help out around here when I can. It's fun!" She let out a giggle and gave Ann a sweet smile before resuming her post at the register. "And it's nice to be needed sometimes."
"Well, that's sweet," Ann returned Popuri's smile. She shifted to Kai as she called over the buzzing kitchen appliances, "Kai's lucky to have you, that's for sure!"
"You're telling me!" he called back without looking, though I could tell by the way he said it that he was smiling. I wasn't sure how someone like Popuri had managed to end up with Kai, but I couldn't deny that something about them worked. As strange as it was to see.
I felt a gentle squeeze on my bicep but immediately realized it was on the side opposite Ann. "Hey," Muffy said smoothly, her hand giving no indication of leaving its place on my arm anytime soon. "Quick question for ya."
"Well?" Her hand felt clammy and uncomfortable against my skin. I lifted my arm to reach up for my hat, effectively shrugging her off without much fuss.
Muffy looked back at Jill, who just rolled her eyes, and then back up at me. "Where's your friend?"
"My friend?" She couldn't have meant Kai; he was still in front of us cooking.
"Yeah, you know, the cute one with the ponytail," she said before taking a bite of her snowcone.
"Oh." I didn't even have to move my head to see that Ann had turned her entire body towards our conversation. "Uh. Not here?"
"Hmm. That's a shame." Muffy turned back to her friend and cocked her head towards the front door. "Well, if he shows up, tell him to come find me, will ya?" She and Jill turned away and headed for the exit, not stopping to wrangle Rock as he loitered at the counter behind them.
"Hey, man!" Rock said with a nod when our eyes unfortunately met.
I raised my eyebrows at the kid and turned back to Ann with a sigh.
"Um. Who was that?" Ann wasted no time asking.
"Rock? I guess he's the piece that's taking Kai's—"
"No, the girl."
"Oh. Muffy? One of Kai's friends from the valley, I dunno."
"And... one of Cliff's friends?"
I laughed, wishing she could have seen the two of them interacting at Kai's party. "Yeah, right. We all met like one time at Kai's, and he was fuckin' terrified of her." That didn't seem to reassure her, so I tried again, "You don't have to worry about her."
"I-I'm not—I was just—I'm," Ann stammered through three separate thoughts before finally getting out a coherent sentence. "I was only wondering, that's all. Cliff's just been… kinda short with me lately, and I don't know… I'm a little worried about him."
"Well, I'm just sayin' it's not like you have to worry about him tryin' to get with some other random girl."
"Gray, that's... " Ann rubbed her eyes before running both hands down the side of her face, "that's not what I'm worried about… I just want to make sure he's okay more than anything." She leaned herself against the counter and softened her eyes towards the door. "I asked him if he was coming earlier, and all he did was shrug."
"Yeah, well, you're a good friend." A much better friend than me, that was for sure. I'd barely said a word to Cliff since he'd brought up my drinking habits, let alone checked in on him. "But maybe you should take a break from worryin' about other people's bullshit for a little."
Ann let out a surprising chuckle and bumped her arm into mine, "Yeah, probably, but I can't help it sometimes. If left to your own devices, who knows what you guys would do without me."
I hated to admit that she had a point. Ann was too good of a friend to me. I just wanted to stop letting her down, making her worry about me, leaving her to deal with the consequences of my stupid actions… Thinking about it was just a reminder of what a piece of shit I'd been to everyone that cared about me. Ann, Gramps, Doug, Cliff, Claire, Mary, my mom … all I ever did was make their lives harder.
"I love how predictable you are sometimes," Kai joked as he approached the counter, handing over two paper trays with a wide grin. "You know, I think about you every time somebody orders baked corn." His wink didn't go unnoticed before he nodded toward the food in my hands, "Those ones are made special for you, though, lots of love."
"Right," I chuckled. The food looked fucking fantastic but not any different than it usually did. So I took his word for it.
"And two snowcones for you!" Popuri passed off the cones to Ann, who eagerly accepted. "The rest should be out…. What do you think, babe?"
"Oh! Yeah, just hang tight Ann, the rest will be up in a sec!" Kai replied before turning back to the kitchen.
I moved my gaze to Ann, already making a dent in the first rainbow ice. "You want me to wait for you?"
She shook her head and swallowed. "I'll be out in a little." A smile crept on her face as she nodded at my full hands. "You should probably deliver your corn while it's still hot."
"Oh, yeah. Right. Thanks." Bringing food had been a spur-of-the-moment decision. Now that the situation was real, I wasn't sure if I could get my body to cooperate long enough to actually follow through.
After a deep breath, I finally mustered the strength to leave. The entire walk, I second-guessed every possible thing I could say to Claire. The way our last conversation went, it was no surprise when even the prospect of talking to her made me an anxious wreck. I was sweating in places I didn't even know were possible, and I wasn't sure if it was from the weather or my nerves.
Outside on the patio, I searched the beach for Claire, finally spotting her on Ann's blanket with a litter of bags and clothes around her. She watched the waves crash in front of her, and all I could think about was how awkward it would be if she saw me struggling through the sand on my way over there.
I was about to walk down the steps to the beach when Karen was ushering Marlin up to the shack, Rick reluctantly on their tail. Karen stopped when she noticed me and turned to Rick, "Be the best boyfriend in the world and help our friend Marlin here get a beer?" she asked, though everyone knew it wasn't a question.
Rick closed his eyes as a frustrated sigh left his mouth. When he opened his eyes, something resembling a smile was presented to Marlin. "Let's grab a drink," he said as if the idea had been his the whole time, opening the door with a force that didn't match his tone.
Unfazed, Karen turned back to me and pointed at my hands, "What's all this?"
"Corn."
"Thank you, captain obvious." She put her hands on her hips and rolled her eyes. "Ugh, talking to you is such a chore sometimes."
"Yeah, cuz it's always such a fuckin' pleasure for me too."
"I'm still waiting for my thank you, by the way." She glanced over her shoulder and then back at me. "Last time I checked, Claire's here, isn't she?"
"Yeah, thanks." I nodded my head at the spot I'd seen the three talking. "What was all that shit?"
"Just helping Claire make some business connections is all," she replied with a shrug.
"Right. Business connections."
"What? It's not my fault Claire's so cute," Karen said as she turned to walk away. "And like, I only ever talk to Marlin over the phone. I didn't know he was hot." She grabbed the shack's doorknob and looked over her shoulder, "Oops."
The door slammed behind her before I could even think of an appropriate response to that level of insanity.
I released the tension in my jaw, reminding myself that she had no idea what she was interfering with. It was frustrating that I couldn't tell her, but I also didn't want to. There was nothing I could do about my own stupid jealous feelings, so I forced them down and continued on my path.
I felt like the trays were going to slip right out of my hands as I settled into the sand behind Claire. She sat with her knees against her chest, one hand moving through a small pile of rocks by her feet. Her face was relaxed, the sea breeze blowing damp wisps of blonde hair across the skin of her back. She seemed so at peace... I hated knowing that I was probably about to ruin that.
Out of the millions of things I could have opened with, "Hey," was all I could come up with for some fucking reason.
When Claire turned her head to look up at me, I braced myself for anger, indignation, anything and everything in between. But I was surprised to be met with stillness. She didn't look upset to see me, but she clearly wasn't excited by my presence.
"Well, hi," was all she replied, but I felt hopeful when she kept those wide sapphire eyes on mine. I searched for any emotion in them, but I couldn't make anything out—positive or negative.
"Hungry?" I tried again.
Her eyes curiously moved from mine to the paper trays. "I never asked you for food," she said before moving back to the horizon.
"Never said you did. I asked if you were hungry." It was a gamble, but based on our previous conversations, there was a chance that she hadn't eaten yet. I didn't want to hope that was the case; I just wanted an in. "Did you eat today?"
Silence. I never knew if that was a good or bad thing with her. After what felt like an eternity of being bombarded by the pounding in my chest, she looked back over her shoulder. As her eyes returned to mine, relief did as well.
"What'd you bring to sacrifice?" she asked, a newfound energy in her voice as she lifted her head to see what was in my hands.
I took a step closer to her seat without realizing it. "Uh, baked corn."
Her laugh caught me off guard, and not because it was some forced, bone-chilling ghost of a laugh, but a real fucking laugh. I didn't realize how much I'd missed that sound.
"What's so funny?" I asked, fighting my own smile.
"Just…" Claire hissed, trying to calm her giggles enough to finish the thought, "out of all the things you could have picked… you picked corn?"
"What? Why wouldn't I?" I couldn't help but scoff. "It's not just any corn; it's baked and delicious. It's… just my favorite, so… dunno thought you might like it too."
Claire sounded like she was on the brink of losing herself in a laugh. "Your favorite food… is corn?"
"Baked corn," I corrected her.
My comment seemed to send her over the edge into a fit of giggles as she pressed her face into her knees, back violently shaking with laughter.
"It's… not that funny—"
"I've never met somebody so passionate about corn!" Claire cried as she lifted her head, eventually giving back into the laughing. "It's just…" she lightly shook her head instead of finishing the thought.
I wanted to bask in the smile she gave me, the way her eyes sparkled when she laughed, but I knew I couldn't overstay my welcome. The voice in my head warned me I should leave while I was still ahead.
I held one of the dishes in her direction, hoping she would take it from me. "Well… uh, just take it, and I'll stop bothering you."
"Oh." Claire's smile faded into a straight line, and she seemed to mold back into the mask she'd been wearing when I first arrived. She carefully relieved the tray from me and held it between both hands. "Well, thanks… y'know, for the corn."
"Yeah," I forced out before turning on my heels. "Enjoy. I'll see ya."
This time around, I didn't even get a step away before I heard Claire call that famed, "Wait." I'd never gotten so much hope from a single word in my entire life.
When I turned around, she was staring up at me, lips pressed tightly together. "You…. you should sit," she finally managed. "It would look weird if you didn't."
I didn't think it would have been that weird, but I wasn't about to argue with the opportunity. Without another word, I took a seat on the blanket next to her, facing the shoreline. When I looked over to Claire, her attention was fixed on the food, and I was suddenly glad I'd taken the gamble. Based on the speed she ate, my guess may not have been that far off.
While it had allowed me an entrance, I hated knowing that I could rely on the fact that she didn't eat as regularly as I thought somebody should. Especially somebody that was potentially growing a whole ass child. I just hoped it was a fluke.
It's not like I was in a position to say anything, though; I hadn't eaten much that day either. So I ate my corn instead to silence the worries from escaping my stupid mouth; I didn't want to risk saying anything that would get me on her bad side again.
Rushing waters and screeching gulls provided the only noise between us. Truthfully it was nice to just be around her, even if we weren't talking. But as I finished my food, the anxiety crept back in. I had no idea what the fuck I was going to say, let alone what I could say without ruining everything.
Claire set the tray to the side and glanced over at me. Almost as quickly, she moved her gaze down to her feet as she swallowed. "Ann and I found some cool rocks today… do you want to see?"
I wasn't sure what I'd expected Claire to say to me, but an invitation to look at rocks was not it. "Uh, yeah. Sure."
"You just work with rocks and stuff, so I don't know..." Claire started as she gathered the pile by her feet and shifted onto her knees to face me. "I thought you might like 'em too, y'know?"
She delicately poured the pile on the blanket between us, organizing the colorful array of smoothed stones and sea glass in no recognizable order. Her thumb glided across the surface of each piece she set down, but her hand lingered on one rounded piece of bright blue sea glass.
Claire lifted it in my direction with an outstretched hand."What about this one?" she asked with a soft smile.
"What about it?" I focused on the curves of the electric blue pebble, despite wanting to look elsewhere.
"Do you like it? It's such a pretty color," Claire retracted her hand and rolled the glass between her fingers, "and it's so smooth." She held it between her thumb and index finger as she lifted it to eye-level. "I picked it up because it kinda reminded me of Ann's eyes, so I was gonna give it to her."
"Oh. Uh, yeah. It's pretty." I wanted to enjoy Claire's attention, but I couldn't for the life of me understand why she was being so friendly.
Did she feel bad? Or was she trying to make me feel bad? Because if so, it was working.
"Hmm, now that I think about it..." Claire's gaze flickered between me and the frosted glass she held up. "You and Ann have the same color eyes…" she trailed off, staring directly into them.
Her lips gently parted like something else might come out, but scorching summer air was the only thing between us. And fuck, how I wanted to close that gap. As her eyes dipped down my face and back up, my breathing was suddenly a thing of the past. I would have missed it if I blinked, but the action made my brain short-circuit either way. I had no idea what Claire was doing or why, but I was too mesmerized to look away.
"But, uh," Claire abruptly dropped her head, hiding the faintest blush that'd spread across her cheeks and any remnants of whatever the hell had just happened. She returned the sea glass to its place on the blanket, and her hand floated around a few different pieces before picking up a speckled grey stone. "Actually, this one made me think of you when I found it."
She leaned forward to give me what looked like a perfect skipping rock, and I held out my hand so she could drop it into my palm. I wrapped my fingers around the soft, weathered surface, eventually opening my hand to admire it in the light.
It didn't glimmer like sea glass, but the stone's unique pattern and coloration was a sharp contrast. Flecks of light blues and yellows decorated the charcoal background like fireworks, and I wondered how a rock like that could remind Claire of somebody like me.
"This one reminds you of me?" I asked in disbelief.
"Well yeah!" Claire grinned, looking between me and the stone as if it were the most obvious observation. "You should have it! It's no corn but… I got a ton of others today, so…"
I looked down at my hand, questioning what I had in common with something so colorful and why Claire was acting so sweet towards me. I was getting too comfortable… way too comfortable. And I hadn't even made an attempt to apologize to her. It was tempting to go along with whatever she was doing, but I couldn't keep pretending like we hadn't gotten into it days prior.
Claire sat back on her feet, shoulders stiffening. "You look like you have something you want to say."
"I… I do," I admitted, squeezing the stone in my hand.
"Alrighty. So...?"
I took a deep breath. "Claire, I need to apologize. For a lot of things."
I was only met with silence, but curious eyes encouraged me to continue.
"I… fuck, I don't even know where to start." I shook my head at myself, thinking about how badly I'd fucked up lately. "I'm sorry for ditching you… and not sayin' anything about Mary. I shouldn't have left you like that."
"Its… I…" Claire tried before sighing and turning away. "I… appreciate the apology. But I should've just respected you when you said you weren't looking for a relationship, y'know?"
I couldn't believe she'd remembered me saying that. Those didn't even sound like my own words anymore. So much had changed since then… There had to be something else I could say to show that.
"And uh, I'm sorry about the other day," I continued, eager to get all the guilt off my chest. "I shoulda told Gramps no, and I uh, shouldn't have said what I did…. I didn't mean it like that."
Claire shifted back to her original seat as I spoke, hugging her knees to her chest. "Then... why did you say it?"
"Just… I panicked. I, uh, only wanted to know if you still wanted me involved cuz..." My voice lost traction as one of my biggest worries moved to the tip of my tongue, "I could, uh... understand if you didn't."
"Gray…" Claire pushed her head into her knees and exhaled before springing back up. "Of course I do! And… I'm sorry if I gave you the impression otherwise. I just needed the space to... sort myself out, y'know?" She pressed her lips together, averting her eyes from mine. "But... it's hard… not having you around sometimes. Like, you're the only person that understands everything going on."
"It's fine. I get it," I attempted to reassure her, again wondering if it came across as genuine. "But, uh, yeah. Feel the same way."
The way she spoke to me was encouraging, but I could tell she had more to say by the way her mouth struggled to stay closed while I talked.
"And it's not fair for me to keep you in the dark like that, so... I'm sorry too." She took a deep breath and turned her entire torso towards me. "My… feelings were valid, but my reaction to everything was not." The phrase sounded sincere, but it also seemed like she'd rehearsed it.
"I'm usually a lot better at managing my emotions, but… I've been struggling a little." Claire's voice softened as she continued, one hand resting at the side of her neck, "I just… want you to know I'm working on it… and I hope that we can try to communicate more honestly, y'know? Despite whatever... personal issues we have with each other."
"Oh, uh, yeah, I agree. Honesty's good." I was shocked with how direct Claire was finally being, wondering where the hell all this rational thought was a few days ago.
Claire shot me a lippy smile as she gathered the rocks sitting between us and put them in her bag. I felt guilty enjoying the sight, knowing that I still had things I needed to get off my chest.
"If we're being honest with each other… fuck, I shoulda told you from the start, but…" I had to look at the sand before I ditched admitting the truth altogether. "Mary and I were sorta seein' each other for a while before you came."
Her head turned. "I thought you said she wasn't your girlfriend?"
"She wasn't."
"Seeing each other… dating…" Claire narrowed her eyes at me. "Like, is that not the same thing?"
"Uh, no. It's not." I wasn't exactly sure where the distinction was, but I'd been convinced there was one.
"Oh." She blinked a few times, pressing her lips together. "Alrighty then…"
"It's just, the night I ended things with her," my grip on the rock tightened as the words left my mouth, "it was the same night as Kai's."
Claire snapped her head towards the shore. I couldn't see her full face, but it did give me a front-row seat to the tensed muscles in her jaw, keeping her mouth screwed shut. As more seconds passed with no response, my stomach twisted itself in knots. Nervously searching for anything to do while I waited, I stuck the rock in my pocket.
"Look, I... appreciate the honesty," she managed in the least appreciative tone, making no effort to look me in the eye. "But like I said before… it was a drunken hook-up. It didn't mean anything, and there's nothing between us. I don't expect anything from you outside of being a parent."
I was speechless. The words were a slap to the face.
Nothing between us? From the same girl that'd told me she liked me and wanted to date me less than a week ago? She'd told me to forget about it in the heat of the moment, but I didn't think she'd actually meant it. If there was nothing between us, then why was she so hell-bent on having my kid? Out of all the fucking people she could pick since clearly, she could have whoever the hell she wanted.
Claire grabbed the trash from her side and shot up from her spot, pointing at my discards. "Are you done with that?"
I held up the paper tray, only able to muster up a curt, "Yep."
She snatched it from my hand without another word and walked towards the trash can between Kai's and Zack's.
Sitting on the blanket alone, I tried to make sense of the emotional whiplash I'd just experienced. I thought I'd done everything I was supposed to, but I couldn't help feeling like I'd done something wrong. It was no surprise, though; even when I tried to do the right thing, I managed to fuck everything up.
A gentle push rocked my shoulder. "Hey, how'd it go?" Ann whispered as she crouched by my side.
I didn't want to look her in the eyes. "We're fine now." It wasn't a lie, but… it didn't feel entirely true either.
"Oh, yeah, don't spare the details or anything," Ann huffed, standing over me. "We can talk later, but Kai asked me to come get you. Guess he needs some help loading boxes or something."
I was pushing up from my spot before Ann was done talking. The way I was feeling, I wasn't sure if I wanted to be on that blanket when Claire came back. Saying what was actually on my mind would probably just fuck things up worse than they already were.
Walking back to the shack, I did everything in my power to ignore Claire as she stopped to mingle with Karen and her fucking seed guy. Ann joined the group as we passed, and I kept my head forward. I didn't want to look because I didn't want to care. Evidently, there was nothing between us, so there was no reason to torture myself.
The minute I entered the shack, Kai put me to work packing up crates of food to load onto Rock's joke of a boat. I wasn't excited to be helping, but it was a distraction and, most importantly, a means of getting those people back to the fucking valley.
My next priority was finding a way to distract myself from Claire for the rest of the night, and I didn't want to admit how enticing that dwindling bottle of tequila looked.
