Hey, everyone! We've got a doozy of an opening A/N this time.

Well, the plan had been to release this chapter early last week.

That was the plan.

But, you know what they say about the best laid plans of mice and men…

It has been a WILD couple of weeks, to say the least. I am sure you have all been affected one way or another by the state of the world right now, and I am certainly no different. Currently, I have an "essential" job right now, so I'm still working. Quite a lot now, unsurprisingly. I've really only had like, a single day off the past week and a half. It's been pretty hectic. Long hours, and short nights. I either pass out asleep when I get home or find myself with an hour or two to kill. Not much time to write, sadly.

I'm not sure when the normal week-to-two-week update speed will go back to normal, but I'm hoping soon. However, if I wind up getting sick, that wait could balloon into a month or two. I'm doing all the proper CDC things like washing hands, keeping a solid distance, etc, but you can never really know. If by some chance I do come down with it (fingers crossed, but I'm pretty healthy so it's not myself I'm particularly worried about compared to my family), I'll try and let you know! If you see a random update in the future and it's just a paragraph like this one explaining the situation, do not be surprised.

I hope all of you are staying safe! Please, stay safe! Keep your distance, wash your hands, stay home when you can. I don't want to see any of you get sick.

And, if you currently find yourself in a 14 day quarantine period, I hope this little chapter might brighten your day some!

Disclaimer: Played it fast and loose with a POV swap in the first section, so don't be alarmed when it goes from Byleth to Edelgard mid conversation. Also, I didn't get to the Rhea section I promised last chapter. I'll go into detail about that down below!

We also now have our own dedicated TV Tropes page for Love in the Dark (thanks nitewind!) Feel free to check it out, add to it, what have you!


"The goddess…" Edelgard mumbled, her lips lingering on every syllable. "You're telling me you were saved by… the goddess?"

Byleth nodded, frowning he felt a wave of grief crash into him. Truthfully, he missed her greatly. Life felt… surprisingly lonesome, now. He was so used to her constant commentary, her sassy remarks… He was sure if she were here now, she'd be talking up a storm. Either chiding Byleth for his brash way of handling things or lamenting her absence in the lives of her children.

"Yes. Without her, I never would have left that abyss," Byleth admitted. "She gave me her strength, sacrificing herself in the process, so that I would have the power needed to return to you all."

As he spoke that truth aloud, part of him expected Sothis to respond.

When she did not, the hole in his heart grew a little larger.

"She…" Edelgard blinked, clearly hearing the words but hardly believing them. "The goddess sacrificed herself for… you? So that you could return… to us?"

Edelgard dipped her head, her eyes wide and lost. Her brow was creased, the muscles in her jaw tightening.

"That's… right."

Byleth hesitated, his strength wavering at the conflicting emotions he saw play out on Edelgard's face.

'Have you ever considered what I might mean to her, Byleth? While I slumbered inside of you… she endured many hardships. Endured terrible, terrible things. She called for me- cried for me to save them, but I… I never came.'

'The goddess abandoned them.'

Sothis's words rung in his head, as though she were truly there saying these things once again.

But she was not.

Byleth did not know if what he was doing was right, but Edelgard deserved an explanation. All of his students did. Without Sothis there to guide him as she once did, he had to remain strong, and trust that what he was doing was right.

"It is because of Sothis's presence within me that my hair and eyes changed to match hers. It is due to her power that I was able to cast that magic you saw. It is due to her, that I… am the way I am."

Byleth did not fault Sothis for that. It was not her fault that his heart did not beat. It was not her fault that for so many years he was lifeless. It may have been due to her presence within his heart, but it was not Sothis's fault. In truth, Byleth did not mind trading those things for a friend such as she.

"What are you saying?" Edelgard asked. Still, she seemed to have difficulty following.

Byleth brought a hand to his chest, running the tips of his fingers down its center.

"Do you remember the night after our battle with Miklan? When you asked me about that scar?"

"Of course." Edelgard nodded slowly, her eyes drawn to the line his fingers had made. Her expression darkened when she realized where he was going with this.

"At the time, I truly did not know how that scar got there," Byleth continued. "While I still do not know the specifics, I know now it was by Rhea's hand. It's because of her that I bear the Crest of Flames. It was by her design that Sothis and I are bound."

He did not know how it happened. The pieces were there, but Byleth did not have the full picture. He knew his mother died shortly after labor, likely due to Byleth's birth. He knew that somehow, someway, Rhea gave him the Crest of Flames, and in turn, Sothis. Even Sothis had said the same.

"Rhea?" Edelgard repeated in disbelief, the realization of what that truly meant causing her eyes to widen. "She… She implanted a Crest within you…"

As Edelgard spoke, Byleth became hyper aware of the stillness in his chest.

"Yes." Byleth nodded. "I do not know how, but whatever she did, it allowed Sothis to exist within me. It is because of that…"

Byleth's hand rested over his heart.

"That I have difficulty expressing human emotion. It is because of that my heart does not beat."

Byleth lowered his hand, meeting Edelgard's frail eyes.

"All that I am was… created by another. Created at birth."

Byleth frowned, averting his gaze.

"Truthfully, I do not know what I am…"

A man? A god?

A vessel?

Was that truly what he was…? Was that truly the purpose decided for him at birth…?

Byleth did not know. Not knowing did not frighten him, but it was painful. It hurt. It made him feel guilty. So many lives were lost for his… His mother, Jeralt, and in a way, Sothis… They were now gone due to him, and Byleth didn't even have the simplest knowledge of what he was. It felt as though he was letting them down by not knowing. These three souls that had sacrificed so much for Byleth's life, yet he couldn't even explain what it was they sacrificed themselves for.

"Byleth…" Edelgard whispered, the gentle tones of concern evident in her voice. Byleth thought it… sweet that even with all of this information he spilled to her, she still found the wherewithal to care for his wellbeing.

Thinking about it now, their origins weren't all that different, were they…? Except, El had lost much more than he. He was likely only minutes old when whatever happened to him took place, while Edelgard was a child. Those memories of those procedures, experiments, and losing her siblings still haunted her regularly, while Byleth had no recollection of any of it.

"I went off on a tangent. That's irrelevant right now." Byleth shook his head. "What matters is that you believe me. Do… do you believe me?"

"Do I believe you?" Edelgard frowned, averting her stormy eyes. "Do I believe that the Crest of Flames was implanted into you at birth? Do I believe that for all of this time… the goddess has existed within you? That… you and the goddess are now one?"

"…Yes." Byleth nodded slowly.

"How could I not, when the proof is before my eyes?" Edelgard answered quietly, her hands clenching into fists. "The goddess… has always been with you…"

Byleth didn't like the way she said that. He expected more confusion. More disbelief. Anger, even. Denial would have been fine, too.

"El," Byleth murmured her name.

Instead, he saw none of that.


The goddess has always been a part of him… He… he was saved by the goddess…

The goddess, who Edelgard had always believed to be deaf, absent, or simply nonexistent, had been right there in front of her. For nearly an entire year, the enigmatic goddess had been right before her eyes.

"It is fine." Edelgard shook her head. Her voice was stronger now, but… "In fact, I am happy for you, my teacher."

Try as she might, she could not prevent her face from contorting in pain.

There was a time where Edelgard had faith. Like the last drop of water in an endless desert, it was her oasis. Powerless and without light, faith in something that she could not see nor feel was the only thing Edelgard had during those days imprisoned. With nowhere to look but up, Edelgard would pray. Pray, and pray, and pray. On the bad nights, she would pray until her body forced sleep upon her. On others, she simply did it because she had no one else to talk to. As ironic as it was… speaking to something that wasn't there was what kept her sane.

Faith in something greater than she… it was a powerful thing. When she was imprisoned in hell, she could at least deceive herself into believing that her prayers might be answered. Praying got her through the day. That small sliver of hope that she and her brothers and sisters might be saved kept her alive.

The prayers mostly consisted of salvation; for someone to come and save them. Once they were… dead, she began to ask the goddess to undo all that had been done. If not that, then to at least bring her siblings back to her.

When it was clear that no one would answer her prayers, she began to ask for death. For something, anything to end her miserable existence. The hope in a goddess or god was gone. Trapped in a nightmare, powerless as she watched her siblings die out one by one, the goddess was nowhere to be found. In that cell where Edelgard had been cut open and tinkered with like some grotesque doll, there were no gods. No goddesses. Only pain, and only death. When she cried for her own death, begged for it to finally end so that she may rejoin her family, there were no answers. Only more pain.

Edelgard began to realize it was more painful believing in a god than it was to not.

"Your weapon is called the Sword of the Creator, after all," she all but forced herself to continue. "It is no wonder she looks favorably… upon you. Just as it was with Saint Seiros, no doubt."

Because if a goddess truly existed, that must mean she had allowed for something this terrible to happen. She would rather believe such a cruel being didn't exist than to believe in that, because…

The alternative was far worse.

Edelgard closed her glassy eyes.

All this time, the goddess did exist. She existed within Byleth.

And those prayers of a broken, lost child had gone unanswered.

Why?

Why were her siblings not saved? They had been good, kind people… What could have been the goddess's reasoning in letting them suffer? In this scenario, Edelgard hardly cared about herself. If anything, she was the lucky one. She lived, and they did not. Why?

Why?

She could feel a hot, wet feeling in her eyes as she considered the answers to these long-held questions of hers. Tears were beginning to form beneath her eyelids.

Edelgard had never… particularly loved anything about herself.

In truth, she was a shell of a person. A walking husk piloted by a brain and its ambitions. When the inheritance of Adrestia's throne fell upon her shoulders, Edelgard bottled up what remained of El and pushed her far down beneath the surface. The emperor's goals and aspirations became all that she was. She would sacrifice anything, anyone to achieve those dreams... Even herself.

Because, if she did not, then she was truly worthless. If she did not reforge this world, change it from the inside out, then she had achieved nothing. Anything less than that was meaningless. Too much had been lost to not achieve anything other than success. The lives that were lost in her name, those siblings that bled and suffered alongside her would have died in vain. She would have failed them all.

She was cold. Sometimes arrogant. She had trouble letting people in. Expressing herself was never a problem, but expressing her heart, what lied beneath her skin always had been. She would never reveal anything about herself that didn't need to be mentioned. She kept people at arm's length. Outside of Hubert, she had avoiding getting too close to anyone. Part of it was born from her natural distrust of everyone and anyone, while part of it was her rationalizing that any unnecessary relationships would only get in the way of her goals... It was that mask of the emperor she hated most of all.

However, deep down… she knew that the biggest motivator had been her own fear of getting hurt again. Getting hurt by those who wished to use her, or getting hurt by losing those she cared about. For a long while, love and pain were synonymous.

Perhaps that was why she had become so quickly infatuated with Byleth. He was the very antithesis of all of these misguided truths the emperor held.

He had protected her. He shielded her from harm. He had selflessly risked his own life for hers, with no personal gain for himself. It was then and there that she had immediately become drawn to him.

At the time, her reasons for trying to enlist his help were purely pragmatic. In truth, they were just excuses. She simply didn't want to relinquish the feelings he had given her. She didn't want to be alone again. She didn't want to lose the one person that sought to protect her life rather than harm it. She didn't want to lose the only other person that thought her life was more valuable than she did.

She didn't want to lose the one person that reached out for her. One of the few that accepted her. One of the few that… saw the face behind the emperor's mask.

To her, Byleth would always be-

"They say the goddess protects all that is beautiful in this world, so it is no surprise she protected… you."

Beautiful.

Of course he would be sheltered by the goddess. Of course he would be protected by her. While it was a surprise to hear, it made sense that someone as beautiful and wonderful as he would be intertwined with the goddess. His very existence seemed to always radiate down on Edelgard, so it was no wonder.

Byleth, more than anyone, deserved a goddess's love and protection.

Yet…

What does that make me?

Edelgard's shoulders began to shake out of frustration. She tried to fight these self-destructive thoughts, but no matter how hard she tried, she could not. These thoughts, these questions, they had always been with her. No matter how hard she tried ignoring them, they were always there.

Was I truly so unworthy of salvation?

And now, as if to spite her, the goddess had taken one last thing from her.

She had taken Byleth.

She had taken him down a path that she could not follow.

Edelgard, someone who had been forged by those who wished to destroy the goddess and her children. Byleth, someone who had been altered by those very same people.

Would this great, wonderful thing she had found in Byleth just be one more thing she lost? Were they truly doomed from the start?

"None of that is true."

As if he could read her very mind, Byleth spoke. The sound of his voice was loud and clear. It overwhelmed the terrible whispers in her ears.

When Edelgard opened her eyes, he was kneeling across from her. Eyes that were as green as the archbishop's… but when Edelgard peered into them, she was not reminded of Rhea at all. Though they seemed to pierce her very core, she was not frightened. She did not shrink beneath that lofty stare.

She felt herself get submerged into it.

"It is not because I was 'beautiful' and you were not. This sword, the goddess… they did not choose me because I was deemed more 'worthy.'"

Byleth's hand tentatively reached out to brush her hair out of her eyes. Then, it moved down the side of her head, resting on her cheek. His thumb brushed away the hints of a tear.

"You are not lesser than I, just as I am not greater than you. If I am strong, it is only because you have given me strength."

"How can you still believe that?" Edelgard asked breathlessly. She avoided his eyes as the self-doubt resurfaced. "You do not need to mince your words for my sake. As things are now, I am hardly your-"

"El, look at me."

Without a second thought, Edelgard obeyed, meeting his gaze again.

"This is truly how I feel."

Byleth's hand inched down her cheek, his fingers trailing down her neck. Though his touch would usually send shivers down her spine, she found herself too enraptured in his eyes to give it much thought.

After a few more agonizing seconds of silence, his hand finally came to rest over her heart.

"To me, there is no person more beautiful in this world than the one before me now," Byleth whispered. "I have never met someone more worthy than you."

His other moved to touch the scar on his chest.

It may have been her imagination, but Edelgard could swear that it was parallel to hers.

"Sothis… It is true that she was a dear friend. Without her guidance, I might have failed time and time again. Without her, I would have lost you all multiple times. Without her, I may not have found the words of my heart when I needed them the most."

'Multiple times?'

'Words of my heart?'

Edelgard did not understand. She couldn't understand.

Her entire life, she truly believed the goddess had abandoned her, or that she just did not exist.

But, now

The goddess was, quite literally, kneeling before her.

Just how much of the past year did the goddess influence? Had there been times where… Through Byleth, the goddess had protected her? Had there been times where, through Byleth, the goddess had given, rather than taken?

"But, not even Sothis could give me what you have."

Byleth's soft voice pulled her from that dark and confusing line of questions.

"And you will never realize how grateful I am for that."

Edelgard lowered her head, moving her hand to take hold of his. She pushed it against her chest, her fingers coiling around his palm.

She did not understand Byleth. Rarely did he ever seem to follow her expectations. Given all that she learned, and all that Byleth was, there should have been no way that they were together now. He was the goddess's chosen. His origins traced back to the one organization that she wished to tear down. By his own admission, he was 'created' by Rhea. Even now, his appearance resembled hers and the children of the goddess. He wielded the Sword of the Creator, a weapon that had the power bring entire armies to their knees… The power to change the world.

He was born in the light.

While she was forged in the dark.

Truthfully, they could not be more different in that regard.

Yet, despite all of that… He understood her. He believed in her. Not the emperor, but her. He saw Edelgard for what she really was and befriended her all the same. Byleth had grown to be her closest ally and confidant. Her sturdiest pillar. In a life where things happened for no rhyme or reason, where nothing good had ever lasted, he continued to stand the test of time.

Despite achieving things that Edelgard never could, reaching heights she could never reach, he had not changed. He had not abandoned her. Having cheated even death, he had returned to her.

Through it all, Byleth had continued to reach out to her. Despite the different sides they came from, he still reached out to her.

While she chased his shadow, he had doubled back to meet her.

While she had longed to stay where the light dwelled, he had moved heaven and earth to join her in the darkness.

Somewhere along the lines, they had met in the middle.

Had things really changed between them? Does his connection to the goddess and her children change the man that she knew? Did those connections change how she felt towards him? What would be lost by keeping her heart open? By continuing to reach out a hand?

Would she truly allow the goddess of all things dictate her life, now?

Before meeting Byleth, Edelgard had always been adept at donning masks; carefully constructed facades to keep intruders out.

"I do not… fully understand your connection to the goddess. For so long, I felt abandoned by her. I felt that there must have been a reason that my prayers had gone unanswered. After a while… it was easier for me to forsake my faith than it was to continue believing," Edelgard admitted. "Truthfully, I do not believe that will ever change. I doubt I will ever fully understand your connection with her."

"You don't need to," Byleth murmured. "I don't expect you to change anything."

"I know." Edelgard smiled slightly.

Before meeting him, her blackened heart had always been scorched by the flames she could not escape. Covered in scars she could not erase. Bruised, beaten, battered and broken. Ignored by the goddess, forced to suffer alone.

Except-

She didn't feel alone; she hadn't for quite a while. Those flames were no longer as prevalent as they once were. Those scars no longer ran as deep as they once did.

"You say that you no longer know what you are-"

Edelgard closed the distance between the two, resting her forehead against his. As she peered into eyes of green that reminded her of the spring, she found the answer to those questions.

They were answers that she already knew to be true. Answers that Byleth had instilled into her from the very beginning.

"But to me, you will always be my Byleth. No god can change that."

Her professor smiled through a sigh, the breath tickling her face. Byleth's shoulders visibly deflated as his feature relaxed. His reaction piqued her curiosity.

"Were you truly that worried?"

"Yes." Byleth's head nodded against hers. "I knew you and the others deserved an explanation, and yet… I was scared."

In that moment, for just a second, Byleth nearly appeared ten years older. Those relaxed features suddenly began to sag, as though the weight of his emotion had drug them down. There was a furrow to his brow, a twinge to his green eyes. They were not so much looking at her as they were looking through her.

"The Eagles… are all I really have left," Byleth admitted with a whisper. "I never knew my mother. Jeralt's gone. Sothis is gone. If you had followed, I…"

He closed his eyes.

"I don't know what I'd do."

"Byleth…" Edelgard frowned.

She moved her head past his, resting it on his shoulder as she embraced him. The two, kneeling on the floor of the tent, shared an embrace; one of the very few they had gotten the chance to in the past month. It hadn't really been all that long since she held him last, but even now, she savored the heat of his larger body. She engraved the feeling of him onto her mind.

"You never have to worry about that," she assured him. With a free hand, she cradled the back of his head.

That reveal had surprised her, but it would never be by her choice to leave his side. There was no way of knowing what cards fate had yet to play, but it would never be her decision to forsake him. Her feelings towards the goddess had grown considerably more confusing, but not towards him. He was still the man she knew. He was still Byleth.

"Thank you for listening to me," Byleth mumbled into her hair. "And for believing me. I know this day has been… hard."

"Yes, it has," Edelgard agreed somberly. She had nearly forgotten those fresh memories of Byleth being swallowed by the darkness. She had nearly forgotten having lost him forever. The information regarding the goddess had somehow uprooted them for a brief while.

But, if anything, those terrible images only reaffirmed what she knew to be true.

"All that matters is that you're here now," she continued, eyes lingering on shades of green.

She considered stating that everything else that had proceeded his return was inconsequential, because to her it was, but decided against it. While Edelgard's views on the gods were muddy, confusing, or even heretical at best, the goddess had meant something to Byleth. With the way he talked of her, using a name rather than a title, it was clear they had some kind of bond. A bond Edelgard would not be able to comprehend, but a bond she would respect nonetheless.

To comment that losing such a thing was 'inconsequential…' Well, she wouldn't do that.

Despite her own opinions towards the goddess, her problems laid within the church rather than the religion itself. While she couldn't know for sure if Byleth exactly had 'faith' or was even 'religious,' she wouldn't dream to describe his loss of a friend as 'inconsequential.'

"Thank you, El." Byleth squeezed her a little harder in response before breaking away from the hug. His eyes narrowed as he noticed the bags under hers. "You haven't slept, have you…?"

Edelgard blinked, caught off guard by the sudden change in topic.

That's right… She hadn't. Again, so much had happened… Sleep seemed to be the last thing on her mind. Watching over Byleth had meant far more to her.

Not that it mattered much; if she were to sleep after today, Edelgard was certain the nightmares would follow.

"Of course, you haven't," Byleth sighed, shaking his head. "You were watching over me."

He sounded guilty about that. There was no need to. In truth, Edelgard had cherished that brief reprieve.

And, now that it was over, she found herself longing for that moment to return. It was unlikely that they would find many more, small moments together like that one. Once they returned to the monastery, Edelgard was absolutely certain Rhea would make her presence immediately known. Byleth would be swept away by the archbishop of all people, and in a few short weeks, Edelgard would have to realize her own destiny. Fate would continue to try and separate their chosen paths.

Like it or not, they found themselves at the precipice of a new dawn, and these days would come to an end.

Would this night… A night where she had nearly lost Byleth, had nearly lost herself, then discovered that the very same goddess that had discarded her and her family existed within him, be the last night they shared together like this? Memories of grief, loss, and doubt were hardly the last she wanted to share with Byleth.

"Don't."

Before she realized it, her hand had shot out to grip his wrist before he could move a muscle.

"I know what you're going to say, and I'm telling you not to."

Byleth tilted his head to the side, an eyebrow raised in confusion.

"Don't leave," Edelgard whispered. She could nearly feel the pleading tone to her voice, but she couldn't seem to help herself.

"El…" Byleth's eyes widened. "I don't want to, either, but it's late. I can't…"

Byleth lowered his head, his eyes lingering on the sleeping bag.

"…With you. I-I can't. You need rest. Alone."

"That is not what I am suggesting." Edelgard frowned dangerously, feeling a sudden warmth to her cheeks. "And I don't need rest, I just…"

Admitting such a thing would have made her feel weak… in the past. In the past, admitting such weakness would make her uneasy; uncomfortable, even.

But, she would rather be weak than alone.

"I just need you," she murmured. "I would rather stay up the night sitting and talking with you than struggling with sleep that would evade me anyways."

His pupils darted towards the tent's flap before they returned to her. As he chewed on his bottom lip, he rubbed the back of his head.

"As your professor, I should scold you," Byleth muttered. Thought it was worded like a joke, Edelgard couldn't tell if he actually meant it as such. "But-"

Sighing, Byleth raised his head and grinned. A small one. It barely took up a quarter of his face.

But, to her, he may as well have been grinning ear to ear.

"I would enjoy that as well."

Settling back down on the floor, Byleth scooted himself over to her so that they could sit next to each other.

"Truth be told, I doubt I'd get much sleep either," he confessed. That grin faltered for a fraction of a second, but to her, it spoke volumes. "This is a far nicer alternative."

Edelgard glanced over at him. As they were sitting side by side now, she had a much clearer look at his face. Though he said he would not be able to sleep, his eyes looked tired and dreary. She wondered how much that might have to do with his own exhaustion, or if it had to do with the toll the day had taken on him.

The day had been far from kind to her, but she could imagine it being just as hard on him, if not more so.

Byleth's gaze jumped to Edelgard's hand as her fingers wove with his. The pair rested on his leg.

"Tell me about her."

Both of his brows raised as he looked up at her.

"Her? You mean… Sothis?"

"Yes. Sothis." Truthfully, she had little desire in hearing about the goddess. Even the name left a bitter taste on her tongue.

"Are you sure?"

"She was your friend, correct? A friend that you… lost?"

Byleth frowned, nodding ever-so-slightly. The pain was evident in his eyes.

"Then, tell me about her."

Other than Edelgard, there likely wasn't many other people he could discuss her with. She, more than most, knew how harmful it could be to one's psyche to bottle up that grief of losing someone dear. Byleth had already lost a great deal, and if possible, she wanted to ease that burden. She would push aside her own personal feelings to assist him with his.

Edelgard had little desire in discussing the goddess, but… she would listen to Byleth talk about his friend. She would not offer him tears from an outsider or worthless apologies, but she could lend him her ear.

"Very well," Byleth replied. His voice was quiet, barely above a whisper, but she noted the way it seemed to crack as he spoke. "Sothis was… very energetic. One could describe her as sassy, I suppose. She often chided me whenever I put myself in harm's way."

That hardly lined up with her interpretation of a god, but that wasn't who they were discussing.

"I was not the only one, then."

"No, you were not." Byleth's smile returned. The hand gripping hers squeezed a little harder. "The term 'boulder' was thrown around quite a bit."

"'Boulder?'"

"Yes." A rare laugh escaped Byleth's lips. "She often called me that."

With his other hand, Byleth swiped at his eyes. Edelgard couldn't see very well in the dark tent, but with the moon's light breaking through the tarp roof, his green eyes almost appeared to be glistening.

"Sothis loved to read," he continued, sneaking another glance at her. "That's how I knew what your favorite book was."

"Favorite book?" Edelgard blinked. Her eyes widened as she remembered the time the two had shared tea months back. "You mean, way back when-?"

"I suppose that means I cheated." Byleth smile turned rueful. "I'll get you another bear at some point."

"There is no need for that," Edelgard remarked, nibbling on her bottom lip as she thought. "That is just a… surprise to hear, is all."

"I imagine it is." Byleth nodded. "In fact, I read all of it to her."

Noticing the unspoken question in Edelgard's expression, Byleth continued.

"I often read to her."

With that said, Edelgard remembered a handful of times where she caught Byleth sitting alone, yet reading aloud. His voice had never been more a whisper, but she had always caught the way his lips would mouth each word.

"So, that was the reason…" Edelgard mumbled to herself.

She then began to wonder how many of Byleth's other quirks were in due part to Sothis. There had been times during their conversations where he had withdrawn into himself, or his eyes would dart to his left or right. As though he was listening to someone else that hadn't been there…

Now that she thought about it, there were also occasions where Byleth would curiously pause mid conversation…

Then, there was that instance at Remire Village… He had snapped at Dorothea, then told someone else to 'be quiet.' At the time, only Jeralt had commented on it…

All this time, could he have been talking to Sothis?

"El?"

Edelgard flinched, turning her head to Byleth. He was watching her quietly.

"Is something wrong?" He asked. There was a slight catch to his voice.

"It's nothing." Edelgard shook her head. "Please, continue."

Byleth nodded, but his gaze hovered on her.

As he spoke more about his friend, Edelgard began to consider once again just how much influence Sothis had in Byleth's life, and in her own.


Byleth tilted his head upwards as he heard the sounds of birds chirping off in the distance. Though it was still dark out, the sun would rise soon.

Their conversation had ended a few hours ago, but he had yet to move from his position on the tent's floor. It was slightly uncomfortable sitting like that on something so… lumpy for so long, but he didn't mind. In fact, he would have been happy to sit there as long as was needed.

He glanced down at the girl slumbering beside him.

Edelgard's head was propped up on his shoulder, her eyes closed and her lips slightly parted as she slowly breathed in, and out. She had barely made it an hour into the conversation before sleep had claimed her. It seemed that she had been more tired than she thought.

Without realizing, his own breaths had evened out to match her pace. Though, now that he had, he made sure to keep the rhythm. He didn't want to wake her.

Byleth smiled as he heard a tiny snore escape her throat. Edelgard would probably be mortified that she made such a sound in front of him, but he found it rather… cute.

He had seen her asleep before. Once back in the infirmary after his father had died, as well as one unfortunate incident during his class, but he had never seen her so peaceful. Her beautiful face was absent of all wrinkles or other signs of stress. The pupils beneath her lids did not jump around as though they were frightened. There was no mumblings or cries for help.

Just a calm, peaceful sleep.

He was grateful for that. As creepy as it may have sounded, watching her sleep had been the most calming thing he had experienced in near a month.

However, as he noticed the awkward way in which she was leaning, he doubted this would be very pleasant for her back. In good conscience he couldn't allow her to stay like that.

Gently, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. Pausing to make sure the slight touch did not wake her, he slowly, and carefully, tilted her backwards.

When their backs touched the ground, and Edelgard had not awoken, Byleth felt a sudden sense of accomplishment. He was worried the act of laying her down would wake her, but it didn't appear to.

That sense of accomplishment did not last long as he realized his arm was trapped beneath her. He hadn't thought that far ahead.

He slid his arm out carefully, almost as if he were trying to pull a sheet out from beneath glassware. Byleth winced slightly when Edelgard stirred, but with his arm pulled free, she was still sound asleep.

He sighed in relief as he sat back up. That had been close. They only had a handful of hours before the others would wake, and it was best for her to catch as much rest as she could. Byleth was mentally drained himself, but his little 'nap' earlier had been more than enough for him.

Byleth looked to the tent's exit, debating whether or not he should excuse himself for now. That would probably make for the wisest course of action, but…

Glancing back at Edelgard's sleeping face, he felt his resolve dwindle.

Shrugging off his jacket, he laid it over her chest. It wasn't nearly large enough to cover her entire body, but he hoped that would work well enough.

When El smiled as he placed the make-shift blanket over her, the rest of resolve vanished.

He lied down beside her, his hands resting in his lap. He angled his head towards her as to not waste the rare occasion.

It was odd being so close to her. Not odd in a bad way, but odd in a… foreign way. Byleth was unused to intimacy. Truthfully, he didn't expect himself to be very good at it. He had never been intimate with anyone before, and though he and Edelgard were together in that capacity, the two had shared very few intimate moments like this one.

In fact, outside of those moments of comfort or relief, the only occurrence of it had been back at the Goddess Tower. Where they had held each other, danced, and were… intimate with each other.

And I almost lost all of that forever…

If Sothis hadn't saved him, he would have. He would have lost that night in the Goddess Tower, and every other future night he might share with Edelgard. He would have lost his friends. He would have lost… everything.

His heart had been at ease a moment before, but as he considered the weight of Sothis's sacrifice, Byleth felt himself frown.

He wanted to reach out and touch Edelgard. Hold her. Cup her cheek. Anything, really. Anything to reaffirm that he was still here, and so was she.

But, seeing her still sleeping soundly, Byleth kept his hand at bay.

So, he simply settled with watching her. The way her nostrils twitched as she breathed. The way her white hair rested over her cheeks. The way her lips would occasionally smack against each other.

As he watched her, the world seemed… still. Quiet. Painfully so. Though the birds were singing their morning song somewhere in the distance, it could hardly fill the void in his mind. He hadn't expected Sothis's absence to be so… silent. He had lived almost all of his life without her there, but now that she was gone, he was unaccustomed to not sharing the confines of his mind with another.

Thank you, Sothis. For everything that you've done for me.

If not for her, what would his life look like right now? A few obvious deaths aside, if not for Sothis's timely nuggets of wisdom, would he be as close as he was to his students? If not for Sothis's advice, would he be as close to Edelgard?

Would any of this be here… if not for her? He wasn't sure. Byleth wanted to believe that his actions were of his own decision; of his own free will. But, if Sothis hadn't nudged him on certain occasions, or been there when he came searching for guidance, would he have all that he had now? Maybe at some point, but certainly not this soon. He would have likely followed his own judgement on certain things, and knowing how inept he was when it came to human relationships, he likely would have miss-stepped a handful of times.

And now, she was gone.

And this life that she had helped Byleth build would have to be maintained by him and him alone.

Throwing caution to the wind, Byleth tentatively reached out, the tips of his fingers brushing against Edelgard's cheek.

I will achieve that life you saw for me.

They traced up her jaw.

I'll do it all.

Eventually resting at her hair.

And then some.

He brushed a strand behind her ear.

I'll live a life that the both of us deserve.

Though he knew the days at the monastery were coming to a close, Byleth would not allow that to be the end of the peaceful days. Just as he would protect his students, he would protect those, as well. This coming war would not be the end to all Byleth loved and held dear.

With his very life, he would not allow that flame to die out.

He would fulfill his dreams. He would bring resolution to Edelgard's.

And he would honor Sothis's request.

"Byleth?"

Byleth's hand froze. Edelgard turned her head towards him as her eyes fluttered open. They were hazy with sleep, but she was certainly awake now.

"What time is it?" She asked groggily, a hand rubbing her eye.

She stopped when she noticed Byleth's hovering near her head.

The professor cleared his throat, retracting his arm and placing it back in his lap.

"You've still got another hour or two," Byleth whispered. "Go back to sleep, El."

Edelgard blinked a few times.

"A-are you sure?" She mumbled. Though she was trying valiantly to fight off sleep, her eyelids kept drooping downward.

"Yes."

"Will you… be here when I wake up?"

Her eyes were nearly closed, but Byleth could spot those purple pupils watching him. It was… rare seeing her so vulnerable. He found that side of her to be incredibly charming.

"Yes." Byleth smiled.

"O…kay."

Not seconds after Edelgard closed her eyes did she fall asleep again. Byleth felt his smile grow as he heard her breathing even out. Her chest began to rise, and fall, slowly again.

I promise.


As the two left the tent beneath the light of the morning sun, Edelgard was blushing furiously. As they walked, she hurriedly straightened out the hem of her pants, her gaze on everything but him.

"Please, my teacher, forget that ever happened."

"Okay."

He wouldn't.

Edelgard shot him a weak glare out of the corner of her eye. His lackadaisical response didn't seem to give her much confidence.

"I cannot believe I did that," she groaned under her breath, a hand cradling her brow.

"Did what?"

Her glare grew a tad fiercer.

"Do you think the others are awake yet?" Byleth asked, hoping to divert her anger with a question.

"Doubtful," Edelgard sighed. "Knowing them, they are likely to still be sleeping."

As he looked around the campgrounds, the only signs of life were Shamir and Alois. The rest of the students were probably slumbering away in the various tents that spotted the grounds.

Byleth felt a sense of pride as he examined his students' handiwork. The tents had been set up as well as he could have done, and they were placed evenly between each other. A small detail, but if they were placed too far away, they might not have been able to hear any coming danger or cries for help. If they were placed too close to one another, they might have heard a little too much.

And the used firepit that Alois and Shamir were standing beside seemed to be set up correctly. The logs were in the proper placements, and the tinder they used seemed to have worked well. Given the fact that it rained, it would have been hard to find dry, flammable material, but the Eagles had done well.

"Alois, Shamir," Byleth greeted the two as he and Edelgard approached.

"Professor." Shamir nodded, the slight signs of a grin playing at her lips.

"Good morning, Professor." Alois smiled widely at him. "It is good to see you up and about! You gave us quite a scare last night, you know."

"Sorry about that."

"Feeling better?" Shamir asked.

"I am."

Physically he felt fine; excellent, even. Like his body had just spent the better part of a winter hibernating.

Mentally, however… He hadn't been as blindsided as he had been with Jeralt's death, but the grief was still there. The vacancy in his mind was uncomfortable. He still missed his mental conversations with Sothis a great deal.

At the least, part of it was mitigated by the fact that Sothis wasn't technically gone. She was still with him… only silent.

Byleth rubbed his chest as he looked back and forth between the two knights.

"What about you? I missed a great deal of yesterday."

"Everyone is fine and dandy," Alois replied, his grin wavering. "They seemed quite worried… and a good deal confused, but health wise, all is well."

It was not his intention to worry them… They were all likely terribly lost on the course of events. The only one that really knew what went down was Edelgard herself.

At least they were in good health.

"Good," Byleth exhaled. He turned to El. "Edelgard, would you mind rousing the Eagles for me?"

"Not at all, Professor," Edelgard said with a bow, excusing herself to do just that.

Both Alois and Shamir watched her go, then glanced at Byleth.

"I'll explain what transpired after the others get here," he assured them. "It is probably best for you two to take a seat."

Byleth motioned to the logs that were placed around the burnt-up campfire.

That seemed to pique both of their interests.

"Is it serious?" Shamir frowned.

The professor paused as he mulled over an answer to that. It wasn't serious in a life-threatening sense… but it was serious in a life-changing sense. This news would certainly be difficult to grasp. Most anyone else would likely not believe a word Byleth was going to say, but he was fairly confident the Eagles would believe his story when all was said and done.

"It is, and it isn't," Byleth answered carefully.

"Can you give us something more to work off of?" Alois asked. He looked concerned.

"Let's… wait for the others. It'll be easier that way."

Alois didn't look terribly convinced, but he nodded nonetheless.

Shamir eyed the professor curiously. Neither one seemed to give any indication they were going to sit down. Both stayed standing beside him, waiting not-so-patiently for the students to rouse from their slumber.

After a few more minutes of uncomfortable silence, Edelgard returned, with the Eagle group behind her.

Even Linhardt had managed to get up. Byleth idly wondered if Edelgard had to be a bit more assertive with the sleepy boy, but he quickly shook off that thought. It was hardly pertinent at this moment.

"Good morning, Professor," Petra was the first to greet him. "I have happiness seeing you on your two feet again."

"Thank you, Petra."

"Are you feeling better?" Lysithea inquired. She, like most of the other Eagles, seemed to be examining him. The way they were staring at him, watching him, was much different than the usual looks he received. Byleth didn't know if he liked that.

"I am." Byleth nodded. He motioned to the nearby logs. "Take a seat and I'll explain what happened yesterday."

The rest of the class flowed past him towards the campfire, giving Byleth their own 'good mornings' or in some cases, a pat on the back or shoulder.

As he watched them all take their seats, Byleth began to feel an unfamiliar emotion.

Nervousness.

He was nervous.

Byleth didn't necessarily have a problem with public speaking, it was just that his profession prior didn't require such things. When he signed on to become an instructor, he still felt no such anxiety over talking to a crowd.

However, as his eyes moved to each of their faces, his nerves went haywire.

What would they think of him when he revealed that, by most definitions, he might be considered a god? He didn't think so little of them to expect his students to be angry or upset, but he worried how this knowledge might change their opinions of him. If the Eagles started seeing him in a different light… Well, Byleth wouldn't enjoy that. He was their teacher, their friend, and in some cases, surrogate family. He didn't want them putting him on a pedestal for unnecessary reasons.

Byleth licked his dry lips, his eyes shooting towards Edelgard. She was standing off to the back with Hubert, her arms folded across her chest. Like the others, she was watching him closely. However, unlike the others, she was not waiting for an explanation.

As the two locked eyes, Edelgard gave him a small nod. Her lips flickered upwards. A ghost of an encouraging smile.

Byleth swallowed the lump in his throat, taking a breath to compose himself.

"I'm sure all of you are… at quite a loss over what happened yesterday," he began, his gaze moving across the rows of faces.

They remained silent. Usually, Byleth welcomed their interruptions. Though he might make a show of it on occasion, he actually didn't mind their usual rowdiness.

However, at this moment, he was thankful for their silence.

"Believe me when I say that I am as well," Byleth added with a small sigh. Even now, he still had difficulty accepting the changes to his body. "But, I will explain it to the best of my abilities."

He paused, looking down to the palm of his gloved hand.

"You are all aware of the goddess, correct?"

A simple question with an obvious answer, but he knew no better segue into what needed to be said.

"Of course, Professor," Ferdinand answered, his brow furrowing.

"How could we not, all things considered?" Hubert quirked an eyebrow. "…What does the goddess have to do with any of this?"

"A great deal. I know this will be hard to believe, but I ask that you trust what I am about to tell you is the truth."

The group grew deathly silent as they waited for their professor to continue. The words Byleth had to describe his relationship with Sothis weren't coming as easily to him now as they had when he was talking to Edelgard. Perhaps it was performance anxiety, or perhaps he was just fearing rejection, but… he just couldn't think of the correct choice of words.

"Whatever you had heard regarding my disappearance yesterday was correct; I was swallowed by Solon's spell and sucked into a realm of darkness. A realm different from our own. A realm where the constructs of space or time do not exist."

Byleth hesitated, the muscles in his jaw tightening as he recalled that terrible feeling.

"It was like nothing I had ever experienced. The abyss was… endless," he mumbled. "And I would still be trapped there now, if I was not saved by the goddess, Sothis."

Murmurs of 'Sothis' and 'the goddess' broke out among the students.

"Professor, is this some kind of religious thing, or do you mean you were literally saved by the goddess?" Caspar asked quietly.

"The latter."

Caspar was quiet for a moment of rare contemplation.

"…Oh."

However, he did not look any less confused.

"It was due to her that I was able to escape that place," Byleth continued, quieting the hushed whispers. "It was due to her strength that I was able to return to you all."

Byleth took a moment to examine all of their slack-jawed faces.

"Your questions regarding the details of my return, my ability to suddenly use such magic, and the change to my looks… Well, there is your answer."

"Wait…" Dorothea frowned, a hand rubbing her forehead beneath the visor of her cap. "T-the goddess? Professor, are… are you being serious?"

"Yes."

"The goddess?" Hubert scowled, crossing his arms. "Do you truly expect anyone to believe such a claim?"

"Do you have a better explanation for what we witnessed yesterday, Hubert?" Ferdinand challenged.

"Of course." The mage shrugged. "Magic. Forces of nature. The Sword of the Creator's latent power. A grand entrance is not evidence of a god's intervention."

"And how might you explain his sudden prowess in white magic?" Flayn asked. Her fingers were gripping the collar of her blouse as she eyed Byleth with greater interest.

"A skill he could have easily been hiding from us," Hubert scoffed. As Edelgard's aide glanced back to their teacher, he simmered down somewhat. "Forgive me, Professor. I mean no ill will, but it will require much more than a light show, a change in features, and some new tricks to make me believe such a thing."

"He has a point," Lysithea admitted quietly as she rubbed her chin. "What we saw yesterday was… hard to believe, but such a claim is even more so. No offense, Professor."

"None taken."

"Um, Professor Byleth," Bernadetta spoke, her voice shaky. "Are you telling us the truth?"

"He would be a fool to make up such a thing," Felix scoffed.

"There are far easier lies to give than divine intervention," Shamir agreed, her eyes trained on Byleth.

"Do you have some other proof?" Linhardt chimed in as he raised a hand. "I have no reason to doubt you, Professor, but perhaps something else might seal the deal."

"Is your esteemed professor's word not enough?" Alois asked. He didn't seem to be challenging Linhardt or looking to start an argument, just… genuinely curious.

"Well, of course it could be." Linhardt blinked. "But my believing doesn't make it true."

"It's fine." Byleth shook his head. Their disbelief was expected. In fact, it was probably a better sign that they didn't take him at face value. "I can show you."

The goddess's sigil bloomed to life in the palm of his hand. The great, golden rune, always rotating around the Crest of Flames. The phrases 'mother of all life' and 'arbiter of every soul' were circling his Crest, among other words and phrases. They were just the ones that immediately caught his eye.

Some of them didn't seem to understand. Some of them did seem to, but they didn't look to believe it.

Edelgard's expression grew distant as she once again gazed upon the proof of a goddess.

"Can it be…?" Flayn's eyes were as wide as saucers, her lips muttering absentmindedly as she peered into the Crest.

"Impossible…" The color had drained from Hubert's face. The dim glow of the Crest reflected off of his dark eyes as he looked to Byleth. They seemed to be the first two to immediately understand its importance.

"What?" Caspar's head jerked back and forth between Flayn, Hubert, and Byleth. "What is it?"

"P-Professor Byleth, what, uh, what exactly are we looking at?" Dorothea asked, barely above that of a whisper. Her pupils spun in circles as she tried to make out what was written.

"The Crest of Flames."

"B-But why does it look like that?" Bernadetta stammered. "It-It's all golden and… glowy."

"Because-"

Byleth closed his palm.

"To escape Solon's spell, the goddess gifted me her power. In doing so, her soul, her will, her… everything, was bestowed onto me. What you see now is the effect of that."

"Professor…" Lysithea murmured. "Are you saying that… the goddess dwells within you?"

As she trailed off, the rest of the group went silent once more as Lysithea's words registered in their ears. Their gazes were glued to his body, but Byleth now realized that what they were staring at was not him. For possibly the first time, they were trying to see Sothis. Were she here to comment now, Byleth was sure she'd take pride in that fact. Either pride, or joy that others might finally acknowledge her instead of only him. Honestly, he wasn't sure.

Byleth shifted his weight to his back foot as he gave a nod.

"I am. She and I… are one."

No one spoke. Not even Hubert, whose stern façade all but fractured under Byleth's words.

The campgrounds grew so quiet, Byleth could hear the wind rustling through the leaves of the trees. He could hear the birds chirping, the crows squawking.

But he could not hear a single breath. Not a single word. Not a single movement.

Only a fragile silence.

As Byleth met their stunned faces, he considered giving them the whole truth. About his origins, about Rhea's part in it, and briefly, he considered explaining his ability to turn back time.

As much as he wanted to be candid and forthright with them, he decided against it. For now, Edelgard was the only one he wanted knowing the truth of his birth. It was not that he didn't truth the others, but… for now, it was what he was most comfortable with. There were so many things he had yet to learn or discover regarding his origins. He just wasn't ready to divulge everything yet.

And regarding Divine Pulse and its abilities and ramifications… Byleth elected the wisest course of action was to keep silent entirely. It went against his desire to be honest with them, but… He realized there were some aspects to his connection to Sothis that should not be disclosed. There were multiple reasons at play here, more than just the fact that such a thing shouldn't be well known. Through experience, Byleth knew that Divine Pulse wasn't the end-all-be-all. It could, and would, fail again. They might not be able to comprehend that a power so great might have drawbacks. They might not understand why or how it could fail. In the end, it was better that they didn't put all of their eggs into that singular basket. Were he to reveal Divine Pulse, he feared the others might rely too heavily on it. Such a power is tantalizing, but one cannot have such strength without sacrifices in return.

It was better for Byleth as well. It was selfish, but… Were he to tell them of his power, then in the future decide against using it at some juncture… Would they be able to understand why? Would they be able to accept it?

In the end… It was best that these burdens only weighed on his shoulders; burdens of choosing who might live or who might die, or the burdens of these timelines averted. They were meant for him and him alone. They did not need to know how many times they have died, or many times a friend had. They would never be cognizant of these skipped over timelines, but even having knowledge of them simply existing could be harmful.

The burden was heavy, but his gut told him the best option was to keep quiet on Divine Pulse. They were all strong in their own right, and this knowledge wouldn't make them any stronger.

He only hoped that was the right decision.

"That's not all there is to it, is it?" Felix was the first to break the silence. "I'm not well versed in these matters, but I would assume a god must have a reason for going so far for you."

"Wh-what do you mean?" Bernadetta inquired timidly.

"Thousands of people die every day." A shadow passed over Felix's eyes as he spoke. "It's not as if the goddess saves all of them."

"You're right." Byleth nodded. "There is more to it."

"That being?" Hubert, having recovered from his prior shock, asked.

Byleth met Hubert's gaze, then turned to the others.

"It is no mere coincidence that I bear this Crest or wield this sword," Byleth replied, motioning to the Sword of the Creator. "The goddess and I have been connected since the beginning."

This time, their response to this reveal wasn't strained silence.

"Um…" Lysithea blinked. The usually articulate girl seemed to be at a loss for words. "Excuse me?"

"Since… Since the beginning?" Dorothea whispered. "Professor, w-what are you saying?"

"Sothis has been a part of me since my birth. She was dormant for most of my life, but she awoke the night I met Edelgard and the other house leaders."

At that, Edelgard's eyes widened. He realized he hadn't shared that particular tidbit with her beforehand, but… it just kind of slipped out.

"For that long…? I… I can hardly believe it. I was there that night, and I had no clue…" Alois uttered, a hand running through his hair. "Did the Captain know?"

"Not that I was aware of." Byleth frowned. "If he did, he gave no indication of it."

Nothing Jeralt had said or written pointed to him being aware of Sothis, but Byleth couldn't totally rule it out. His father was always much more intelligent and insightful than he cared to let people believe. It was… possible, Byleth supposed. But, again, he doubted it.

"I know this is hard to believe, and it likely blindsided all of you," Byleth sighed. "But I swear to you, I am telling the truth."

"It is a hard-hitting truth, however… You have not given me any reason to doubt you, my friend. I believe you."

The professor turned to Alois. The knight's stunned face had morphed into an easy grin. Honestly, he expected this response from his father's old squire, but the response still relieved Byleth greatly.

"As do I."

Byleth smiled as he heard Edelgard's loud, definitive agreement. Everyone in a fifty-foot radius would have likely heard it.

"Yeah, I mean…" Caspar paused, a few fingers scratching his cheek. "It's a little hard to follow, I admit, but I believe you, Teach."

"It is the same for me, as well." Petra nodded. "I am not sure I have understanding, but I know I have trust in you, Professor."

"I agree that you are not the type of person to tell such a lie," Lysithea added. She hesitated, a hand rubbing her chin. "And I admit, such an explanation would satisfy many of the questions I have held."

"You have shown me nothing but kindness since I joined the Eagles; you will always have my upmost trust, Professor," Flayn assured him.

"M-mine too!" Bernadetta tagged along eagerly. After her initial outburst, she simmered down quickly. "J-just don't let the goddess judge me too severely…"

"Bern, it's been almost a year; I don't think you have anything to worry about," Dorothea giggled, rubbing her friend on the back as she looked to Byleth. "And I believe you, Professor. It's… a surprise to hear, but I know you would never lie to us."

Byleth was truly touched by all of their ready support. He was.

But, at hearing Dorothea's final line, he had to bite back his frown. There were scenarios where he would surely lie if he thought it was in their best interest, but he supposed they didn't need to hear that now.

"You have my vote of confidence," Linhardt stifled a yawn. How he could go from stunned to tired in a matter of seconds would always be fascinating to Byleth.

"Likewise." Ferdinand nodded, grinning as he usually did. "You are one of the most noble men I know, Professor. You have earned that, and then some."

"Ferdinand…" Byleth mumbled, blinking in shock. He would never go that far, but hearing Ferdinand's show of trust was quite touching for the teacher; especially from a man as honorable as he.

"As long as your skill with a blade hasn't diminished, it makes no difference to me." Felix shrugged.

"Is that all you care about, Felix?" Lysithea sighed. "Swordsmanship?"

"No," he grunted, turning his head away. "The others already said it well enough, didn't they?"

Lysithea's brows raised slightly at that.

The only one yet to speak was Hubert. Byleth glanced his way, but given the contemplative look on his face, he didn't expect much. The loyal aide's gaze was still dead set on where Byleth's Crest used to be. His eyebrows were scrunched together, his lips slightly separated as his distant pupils considered the possibilities Byleth had shared with them.

The professor wanted Hubert's trust. He even felt as though they had made some headway recently, but he knew better than to push the matter.

"Thank you, everyone. Your… trust means a great deal to me."

So, Byleth settled with a grateful smile. Nothing more would be asked of them.

"You will always be our dear professor. Nothing can change that," Edelgard remarked, her eyes darting to the Eagles. "And I am sure my fellow classmates agree with my sentiment."

The class nodded collectively- minus Hubert, who was still lost in thought.

"Though, I do wonder…" Linhardt mumbled, pinching his chin.

"Linhardt?" Edelgard cocked an eyebrow at the lethargic boy.

"It's just…" The healer paused, meeting Byleth's eyes. "What happens now?"

"What are you meaning?" Asked Petra.

"Well, if the professor and the goddess truly do share such a connection, I have trouble believing everything is going to go back to normal," he replied. "Will he even be our professor when we return?"

"I… had not considered that," Ferdinand murmured, his lips curving into a frown. "But you are correct; I am sure Lady Rhea will require much of Professor Byleth's time from here on out."

"So? He'll still be our professor…" Dorothea trailed off, glancing at Byleth. "Right?"

The mood shifted as his students began to consider what the coming days might hold. While Byleth had thought it over himself, even he wasn't entirely sure what might be required of him when he returned to the monastery. It was highly likely the archbishop would request a great deal of his time. What might the church want from him once the news broke out? Byleth had no desire or intention to become a high-ranking official in the religious organization, but… It would not surprise him if such a position was offered if they truly believed him.

"I am afraid I do not have an answer for you." Byleth frowned as well. "It is… unlikely that things will go back to the way they were."

These days at the academy, perhaps the greatest of his life, were coming to an end. Byleth knew it, and he was sure Edelgard did as well. Soon, his decision to join her would be well-known. War would break out across the lands, with Byleth standing beside the helm.

Soon… The Eagles would have to pick a side.

So, no. Byleth could not promise such a thing. In all likelihood, this moment they were sharing now might be the last they shared together as a class. The thought pained him greatly, but that was the way it was.

He snuck a look at Felix. At Lysithea. Flayn. Where would they stand in a year's time? Would stand beside him and Edelgard?

Or opposite them?

"But, as Edelgard said-"

Byleth smiled.

"I will always be your professor. If you are to remember any of my lessons, I hope it is that."

He saw a few smiles. A few nods. But, overall, the Eagles reacted with more silence. The mood was still somber, but Byleth hoped that at the very least he managed to lighten it somewhat.

"If we are to make it back to the academy before day's end, you all better pack your things," Byleth continued. "You're all dismissed."

As expected, none of them moved very quickly. Dorothea still appeared crestfallen. Linhardt was still ruminating his question. Hubert was still lost in his thoughts. Flayn looked to be a mix of awestruck and worried. Bernadetta was looking to him with hope in her eyes. Ferdinand was trying to appear as strong as usual, but the twinge to his strong, composed expression betrayed it.

Edelgard lingered behind, with Hubert at her side.

"Alois, Shamir." Byleth turned to the two knights. "Would you mind retrieving our horses?"

"Consider it done, Professor!"

Alois was boisterous as always, but the way he would throw glances at Byleth and his students was quite telling. He, too, appeared to be at a bit of a loss. He could not be faulted for that; even Byleth was still thinking about the turn the conversation had taken.

Shamir, however…

"Professor."

Ignoring his request, strode up to him.

"A word?"

"Of course."

Byleth stepped off to the side, as the look on the mercenary's face told him the coming talk would be something of a personal nature.

Once they were a few steps away, Byleth opened his mouth once more.

"What is it?"

Shamir hesitated, her eyes darting to the lines of students that were milling around their chosen tents.

"I don't believe in the Church of Seiros."

Byleth raised an eyebrow, sneaking a glance at the students before returning to Shamir. Her straight-to-the-point response had surprised him.

"It makes me a bit of an anomaly among the knights. Rhea took me in, so I became a knight to repay my debt to her. Nothing more."

Her hardened eyes met his.

"Yet, those students of yours all believed you. Without a second thought, they trusted you."

"I wouldn't say that," Byleth murmured. "They rightfully had their share of disbelief at first."

"They didn't put up much of a fight." Shamir shook her head. "Even with the events of yesterday and that Crest of yours, what you told them was improbable. Impossible, even. Evidence or not."

Shamir frowned, her eyes narrowing as though she was examining him.

"Sometimes, I wonder if the faith they place in you is blind," she stated. "There's no personal gain in it for them were they to follow along. No obligations to do so. No debt to be paid. They are not being forced. They do so willingly. Why?"

"You want to know why my students trusted me?" Byleth asked, tilting his head to the side.

Shamir nodded. It was clear the answer she was looking for lied deeper than whatever Byleth could gleam from her curious question.

"If Professors Hanneman or Manuela said such a thing to their houses, they'd be met with Silence. Doubt. Scrutiny. Brushed aside. What makes you so different?"

Honestly, he had difficulty answering such a question. Hanneman and Manuela, in all rights, were better teachers than he. They were more intelligent. They likely knew how to construct a lesson plan and impart that knowledge onto their students better than he could. Were they to make the claims he did, they should be believed.

"I don't know."

"You… You don't know?" Shamir blinked.

"I don't. If you want me to tell you what makes me different from my colleagues, I cannot."

Byleth hesitated as he thought of the right words to say. Taking a moment to compose his thoughts, he spared his beloved students one last look.

"I cannot speak for the other professors, but… What I have with the Eagles isn't a typical student-teacher relationship. They-"

A small grin formed as he watched Caspar chastise a slow-moving Linhardt. Felix was assisting Lysithea in taking down her tent. Flayn, Dorothea, and Petra were talking over their shared work, and though it was slight, Byleth could spy the hints of a smile on Dorothea's face. Edelgard sighed as Ferdinand boasted about his 'proper' packing skills.

Despite everything, despite what he might put them through, they were still the same Eagles that had captured his heart so many moons ago.

"They mean much more to me than that."

When Bernadetta noticed Byleth watching them, she smiled and waved timidly at him.

"And… I think they feel the same," Byleth said, waving back.

When Shamir looked over to what Byleth was waving at, Bernadetta hurriedly turned away.

"I cannot speak to the relationships my colleagues have with their own students, but I'd like to believe that's the reason."

Byleth lowered his hand, meeting Shamir's gaze once more.

"You know, I don't put much stock in the Church of Seiros, either."

Shamir's eyes widened slightly at that.

"An interesting stance to take coming from you."

"Maybe it is, but it's true." Byleth shrugged. "Religion, gods, goddesses, I don't lose much sleep over it. I've only concerned myself with things grounded in reality. While I certainly find myself thinking about these things more than I once did, I can't say if that feeling has really changed."

If Shamir was anything like him, then he was certain she felt the same in that regard.

"When I learned that the girl inhabiting my mind was in fact the goddess, I was obviously shocked. It was hard to accept, and at first, harder to believe."

Byleth paused as he recalled that evening. It was right before the grand ball, the day he and Edelgard had gone to visit Manuela regarding his erratic heart. It really wasn't all that long ago, but it felt like ages had passed since then.

"But, in the end, I realized it didn't matter." Byleth shook his head. "Above all else, Sothis was my friend. Being a goddess didn't change how I viewed her, nor our friendship. Even now, that hasn't changed."

He nodded at his students.

"I'd like to think they feel the same towards me."

Shamir hummed, her own gaze moving back out to where the students were gathered.

"Haven't you ever met someone that made you feel that way before?" Byleth asked. "Someone that you'd trust unconditionally?"

"…Yes. Once upon a time."

"Then, surely you understand."

Shamir snorted, shaking her head.

"I'm not sure about that, but…"

When she met Byleth's eyes this time, she smiled. It was a small one, but it was friendly. Welcoming, even. It was a rare sight coming from her.

"Thank you, Professor. I think I found the answer I was looking for."

Byleth's brow furrowed slightly at that. How could she find what she was looking for if she didn't understand it?

Regardless, he nodded.

"Glad to hear it."

"I'll go assist Alois, now. I'm sure he needs the extra pair of hands," Shamir said as she stepped past him.

She barely made it a few feet before she stopped, turning her head back over her shoulder.

"Should you and the Eagles ever find yourselves needing assistance in the future, my bow is yours."

"Thank you, Shamir." Byleth smiled. He wasn't sure if he would have the opportunity to take her up on the offer, but he appreciated the gesture. "I'll remember that."

"Good."

The mercenary nodded at him, then promptly walked away. It was hard to see given the way she was standing, but Byleth could swear he saw the hints of that very same friendly grin adorning her features before she turned to leave.

Byleth stood motionless as she watched her go. Those vague visions of a war-torn future flooded his mind. Just as he had with his students, he wondered where Shamir might fit into those puzzle pieces. What role might she play? Which cause would she fight for? Though the visions were hard to decipher or understand, he didn't recall seeing anyone resembling-

"My teacher?"

Byleth flinched, his head jerking to Edelgard, who was now standing beside him.

"What is it, El-" He froze as he realized the name he let slip. "-delgard?"

"The others should be ready to depart momentarily," the princess replied, the subtle signs of a smirk growing on her lips. Thankfully, she seemed happy by Byleth's reflexive response to refer to her by her nickname.

"Very well." Byleth nodded. "Why don't we go and help them finish up, then."

"Understood." Edelgard bowed her head as she fell into step with him.

As the two walked towards the other Eagles, the two sides of time never strayed too far from Byleth's mind. Thoughts of the future, and of the past. Of what awaited him at the monastery when they returned, and what laid beyond. Thoughts of Sothis and how much he wished she was here right now. Thoughts of a war yet to be, and war that already was. Every couple of seconds, when Byleth realized he had drifted too far off, he glanced at Edelgard and returned to the present. Beautiful, white hair that spilled over her shoulders. Brilliant purple eyes that were always pointed ahead. The dignified, composed way in which she carried herself prompted Byleth to try and do the same.

Yet, try as he might, he could not ignore the arrow of time.

While his feet were grounded in reality, the feel of grass beneath his boots-

His mind was lost in clouds of white.


And there you have it! I truly hope you guys liked this one. It was honestly one of the harder chapters to date. This whole Coronavirus business along with the difficulty of this chapter really pushed my completion date back a week or so. Plus, I didn't entirely envision the Edelgard part and the Eagle part taking up as much space as they did.

As you can see, no Rhea part yet. In the interest of getting a chapter out sooner rather than later considering the state of things right now, I decided I would just push that conversation into what I have planned next. Honestly, it works just as well. Probably better, as I can start with it right off the bat instead of transitioning to it. And, it gives everyone something to hold them over in the mean time!

So, in place of Rhea, I decided to throw in the Shamir scene, and I'm happy I did. If I hadn't, the original draft toootttallly contradicted a crucial aspect to her C support with Byleth. So, that's a relief.

Shamir is really an interesting character to me. Especially in Crimson Flower. I've enjoyed exploring her finding a "cause to fight for," and am looking forward to touching on her again later on (plus a few other characters that have yet to make their allegiance known).

And, of course, I very much enjoyed exploring Edelgard and the heavy topic of faith. It's possibly one of my favorite aspects of her character due to how complex it really is. It's not this "black or white" scenario where it is or it isn't. No definitive answers. No simple yes or no. Just like Edelgard's character, it is quite deep and complex.

Edelgard's transition from being faithful, to losing her faith, is something really fascinating to me from a writer's perspective. Like, imagining just how AWFUL things had to be for her, to the point where it broke her faith in the goddess, is quite compelling to me.

Its beginnings and middles are so tragic, but the conclusion to Edelgard and her faith is something I think is truly beautiful. When we get Edelgard's amazing "When humanity reaches out for one another, there is no need for gods" line at the very end of the game, I get shivers. Not only is it a BADASS line, but it's very powerful, very emotional. It's honestly the perfect final scene to Crimson Flower.

Truthfully, Edelgard and her battles with religion, the goddess, and faith might be something I come back to later on when I'm looking for a new story to write when this one is over.

Now, on to Byleth, and the birth of his "head lost in the clouds." As some pointed out, the way I interpret it in this story is Byleth and his "two sides of time." The idea that whenever he has that contemplative, not in the present look on his face, he's actually thinking about the past or future is something I really love.

While Edelgard has her struggles with faith and her own personal view of herself, the struggle I want Byleth to have is something similar, though a bit more existential. It never really touches on it, but I have to imagine this being a terribly confusing time for Byleth. Questions of how he came to be have always been a thing I've reiterated, but now questions of WHAT he is will begin to form as well.

And, of course, this all tying into the 'humanity' theme that is prevalent in Crimson Flower. I honestly have quite a bit planned for the end of White Clouds and the end of Crimson Flower, and I really can't wait to tie it all together for Byleth.

Anyhow, I'll leave it at that! I'm hopeful the wait for next chapter won't be as long. Only two parts left before the end of White Clouds! The coronation, then the conclusion. Almost there!

Again, take care everyone! PLEASE, stay safe!

See you soon!