disclaimer: still own nothing

A/N: Longer chapter! Yeah! Thanks to my Beta for reading this!


"I don't want the week." Tina said, folding one of the shirts Newt had brought her for her brief hospital stay.

"Tina-"

Tina turned to him.

"I don't. I'm an Auror. And just because something-" Tina's breath hitched for a moment as she stared at him. She took a deep breath. "Just because something bad happened to me does not mean that stops. I am not resigning."

Newt chose not to argue further. They both knew Tina would take the week, because she had to and whether she wanted it or not, she needed it.

"Are you all right, Tina?" he asked.

As soon as Newt said it, he knew he shouldn't have. Tina stopped and pressd her hands to her forehead, over her eyes.

"I don't know." she whispered. "I don't know, Newt."

She was shaking. Newt walked over to her and, hesitating for a moment, hugged her. Tina leaned into him, letting out a shuddering breath.

"It feels like a dream, sometimes." she whispered into his shoulder. "And I don't know what to do."

"Neither do I." Newt said against the top of her head.

Tina let out a breathy laugh. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Being honest."

Newt was silent for a moment, just holding her. Tina gently pulled away and picked up the small bag he'd brought her the first morning. Newt stood there awkwardly. Tina held her hand out to him. Newt took it.

A moment later, she Apparated, pulling him along. When Newt blinked, they were standing in Tina's apartment. It was easier than trying to sneak past her landlady.

It seemed dark and lonely with Queenie gone. She'd been gone for a few weeks now. Newt had no idea how to contact her or she would be here right now. Tina looked around. Being home, she didn't seem to know what to do now. Newt released her hand. Tina started to walk towards the bedroom, then turned back.

"Nothing got out, did it?"

"No."

Newt had barely prevented the niffler from tearing the apartment apart the night before, but had stuffed it back into the case before it could.

Tina stopped in the bedroom doorway. For some reason, she seemed unable to bring herself to cross the threshold.

"Newt?" she said, without turning around.

"Yes, Tina?" Newt stepped forward half a step.

"Would you . . . . . would you give me some time alone?" Tina paused for a moment, turned her head slightly to loo at him. "I'll make dinner for us alter. Just . . . . please. I need to be alone for a while."

Newt stood there for a moment. It was obviously just a polite way of telling him to get out, but he wasn't going to argue.

"Of course, Tina. Whatever you need."

Tina's expression changed at this, but Newt Apparated without saying anything further.

When he returned late that evening, Newt still felt a little awkward and removed. Tina was in the kitchen, trying to cook. She'd never had the skill that Queenie had with such spells and the water on the stove erupted into boiling so suddenly that it splattered the stove. Tina sighed at this.

"I guess I never realized just how much I depended on my sister for food."

"Out of curiosity, what have you been doing since she's been gone?" Newt asked.

He was standing back and simply watching. He had never been that capable of cooking with magic either and felt that it would end in disaster if he added his own spells to Tina's.

"Not much."

Tina flicked her wand and plates flew on to the table. Belatedly, Newt set it the rest of the way. Once the meal was done-within a minute or so-he and Tina sat down across from each other. The silence that followed reminded Newt strongly of the first meal they had eaten together, but there was no one else to break the silence.

Tina wasn't eating much, poking at her food with her fork. Newt supposed this was how things went. The terrible thing happened and you knew it had happened to other people before, but no one told you how to deal with it after it had.

"I didn't mean to be so . . . . . cold earlier. I just . . . I really needed to alone. I wasn't trying to push you out."

"I understand the need to be alone sometimes." Newt said, looking up at her. Tina gave him a small smile. "There is is."

Tina looked confused.

"What?"

"Your smile."

That made Tina smile slightly again. Newt felt almost relieved to see her smiling again. They talked a little, carefully avoiding the subject of what had happened. Once the meal was finished, Newt did the dishes, without magic. He and Tina fed his creatures after that. They didn't linger, but Newt kept an eye on her, noticing Tina seemed at ease with them. Soon after this, they went to bed.

Tina had given him Queenie's bed since he'd been in America. Newt lay in the dark for a while, staring up at the ceiling. He wanted Tina to talk to him about what had happened. He wasn't certain that was the normal thing to do, but no good could come out of avoiding it. He hadn't been seen her cry since the night in the hospital. Newt didn't want to see her in tears again, but keeping things bottled up would do her no good. Perhaps that was why she had asked him to leave earlier. Newt fell asleep as these thoughts continued to circle through his mind.

When he woke up in the middle of the night, he wasn't certain what had woken him up. He heard a small noise and snapped his head towards Tina, but he couldn't see her well in the dark. Newt slid out of the bed and turned on the light.

Tina was still asleep, but it was obvious that it was not restful. She was jerking, breathing hard, small sounds of fear bursting from her throat. Newt stood over her, hesitating for a moment.

"Tina." he said. "Tina!"

He shook her, gently at first, then harder. Tina gasped, eyes flying open. She fought him for a moment, then focused on him.

"Newt?" she breathed, chest heaving.

"It's all right, Tina. You're not there anymore."

He couldn't think of anything else to say. Tina practically lunged forward, hugging him tightly. Newt sank down on to his knees so they were level with each other. Tina sniffed hard, shuddering in his arms, but she was gently stilling.

"I'm sorry." she whispered. "I'm sorry."

Newt closed his eyes.

"Oh, Tina. You have nothing to be sorry for. Nothing." he whispered back, rocking her gently.

They stayed like that, neither of them wanting to let go.


XXXXXXXXXX


The week Tina had off passed quickly. Newt and Tina spent most of it together, but Tina was still avoiding talking about it. Newt let her. He wasn't certain it would be right for him to bring it up before she was ready.

He was startled when she asked him to find somewhere else to stay the night before she was returning to work. They had been pushing things with the landlady, but Newt didn't thin that was the true reason. But he agreed without argument and found a room in a wizarding establishment. It was small and there was a greater risk with his creatures, but at the moment, Newt felt he would probably do anything that Tina asked.

She was coping, readjusting, and he knew he couldn't stand in her way. She had been quieter than usual, but Newt still didn't push. His and Tina's relationship seemed to have almost ground to a halt. He also didn't push that.

He made dinner, the Muggle way, the first night after she came home from work. Tina looked startled when she walked into the apartment, but she laughed a little.

"You're sweet, Newt. You really are." she said, closing the door.

Newt smiled at this.

Things turned awkward again as they ate, for the first few minutes.

"Picquery came to see me today." Tina said quietly.

Newt froze for a moment. "Did she talk to you?"

"A little. I told her that I wasn't going to resign. And that I don't want any more time. I need to be working. I think she understood that."

Tina paused for a moment, almost of if they next part was something that she didn't want to admit.

"She told me that they still haven't caught the man who raped me. The don't know who he is. Just one of Grindelwald's fanatics who wanted revenge on the two of us for apprehending him."

Tina let out a somewhat shuddering breath at her own words.

"They'll find him, Newt. It might take some time, but they'll find him."

Tina gave him a small, sad smile.

"I'm not sure I want them to."

Newt blinked, speechless for a moment. He shifted in his seat.

"Why-"

"I want to put it behind me, Newt. I'm not sure I want it dragged up again in the future."

Newt said nothing. That was something he understood too, but at the same time the fact that the man may just go unpunished for what he'd done to Tina sickened him.

"They don't know how to treat me, you know." Tina said, twirling some of the pasta he'd made around her fork. Her tone was almost conversational.

Newt paused for a moment. He felt he may have fallen into that category. Tina seemed to realize what he was thinking.

"Not like you, Newt. Not like you." She reached out and took his hand briefly, squeezing it lightly. "You're trying to help me. Everyone at Macusa . . . . . all of them know what happened and none of them know what to do. Either they all were awkward or were pretending nothing had happened. I felt so . . . . . off balance."

Tina withdrew her hand and brushed a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Well, it was your first day back." Newt felt the sentence was feeble, so he continued. "If they don't know how to treat you, Tina, that's their problem. Not yours."

"I know."

Tina sipped her water, staring intently at a point just over Newt's head. Her expression changed as she set the glass down. It was a slightly vulnerable look.

"I'm sorry for this past week."

Newt stared at her for a moment, surprised that Tina felt she needed to apologize.

"I just . . . . ."

"You don't need to apologize for anything, Tina." he said.

"I know. But I want to. You've been so wonderful to me and I haven't been able to really appreciate it."

Newt had no idea what to say to this. Even so far into their relationship, he didn't know what to say to things like this. And this past week had turned everything on its side.

"So." Tina said, in an almost brisk tone that suggested she wanted to move past just what had been said. "How was your day?"

Newt described how his day, mostly spent with his creatures, had been. Tina smiled at some of his descriptions and returned the story with some of the cases that Macusa was currently handling. When the meal was over, they both stood and took the dishes to the sink. Tina smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

After the dishes were done-he insisted on helping-Newt left Tina's apartment. He wandered the streets a little, but he didn't stay too long, unsure of walking the streets of New York with his case in his hand. He was fairly certain Picquery knew he had brought it back to Newt York with him and he's going to push it by giving his creatures more opportunity than necessary to escape again.

Newt wondered about Tina, about her choice to return to work as soon as possible, along with how the other Macusa workers were treating her. He wasn't certain how they were supposed to be treating Tina, but from what she had described, the way they were obviously wasn't right. He wanted to help Tina, but in that department he was sorely unable to do so.

When Newt returned to his room, he sat on the edge of the bed, case in his lap, still thinking. Eventually, however, he set the case on the floor, flipped open the lid, and climbed inside.

The next week was busy enough that Newt and Tina hardly saw each other. Newt stayed in New York. He'd been there for a while now-nearly three weeks-but he had no intention of leaving now. He wasn't certain how long he would stay.

The time of his departure hadn't been clear even before Tina had been raped, but he couldn't just leave her now. Especially with Queenie gone. Newt was fairly certain that right now he was the only person that Tina had.

Today he was waiting for her outside the bank where they'd first met. It wasn't far Macusa and one of the spots in New York Newt knew how to find easily. Unlike that day, there wasn't a crowd gathered on the steps.

Newt was sitting on the steps, feeling a little twitchy without his case. But he wasn't about to bring the niffler near here again. He'd learned the hard way not to. He glanced around, looking for Tina.

She had been the one that had suggested he meet her when she had her lunch break, but seemed she was running late. He waited for another few minutes before a shadow fell over him. Newt looked up. Tina was standing over him, hands in the pockets of her coat.

"Hi." he said, standing up.

"Hi."

Tina's tone held a note he hadn't heard in it before.

"Lunch?" she suggested.

Newt nodded and fell into step beside Tina as they headed down the sidewalk. She was abnormally quiet as they did.

"A-Are you all right, Tina?" Newt asked.

She wasn't looking at him, the air around her radiating tension. Tina's didn't respond at once, still staring ahead of her. She stopped suddenly, on the corner, head down for a moment.

"Tina?"

Newt stood facing her, gently putting a finger beneath her chin and tilting her head up so she was looking at him. Tina turned her head slightly.

"One of the other Aurors . . . ." Tina shook her head, expelling a sharp breath. There was anger in her eyes, as well as a slightly wounded expression. "He called me a slut."

Tina looked up, as if she couldn't look him in the eye. Shock pulsed through Newt at this.

"Because you were raped?" he asked, placing his own hands in his pockets.

"Yeah."

Tina nodded. She let out a strained, humorless laugh.

"I guess he thought it was my fault. Or that I wanted it to happen, or -" Tina broke off, blinking rapidly.

"You didn't believe him, though, did you?" Newt said.

Tina said nothing.

"Tina." He moved so that he was in her line of vision. "You don't believe it was your fault, do you?"

Tina looked at him.

"Maybe it was, Newt. I lost my wand, I let him get the better of me. And why would he do that? In all my years as an Auror, something like this has never happened. So why did it then?"

Tina wiped her eyes quickly on the back of her wrist. Newt placed his hands on her upper arms, leaned in closer so that none of the Muggles passing them could hear what he was going to say.

"You listen to me, Tina. You listen to me. This wasn't your fault. Nothing you did made that man rape you. Nothing. Just because you lost your wand and he overpowered you, it does not mean you deserved what he did to you."

Tina said nothing, blinking rapidly.

"Tina." Newt practically pleaded with her.

"I know, Newt. It's just . . . . ." Tina shook her head.

Newt squeezed her hand. Tina wrapped her fingers around his tightly.

"I go back there, every night. Every single night. I keep going over what happened. What I could have done."

A tear ran down Tina's face. She let out a shuddering breath. Newt hugged her tightly. Tina let him, taking deep breathes. Within moments, however, she pulled away. Her eyes were tear free now and her expression was still.

"I need to get back to work."

"Tina-" Newt started, but she was already walking briskly away from him, leaving him standing alone on the sidewalk.


XXXXXXXXX


Newt struggled to get through to Tina over the next weeks. They still saw each other, still spoke, but Tina was shut off from him. She refused to speak of the rape. The time they spent with each other was infrequent and most of the time short. He spoke to Picquery regarding what had happened. Not Tina's sudden shift in personality, but about the man responsible.

As far as the Dark wizards who had been caught were concerned, the man who had raped Tina was someone they had never met. Veritaserum had proven them wrong, but they had learned next to nothing. Picquery went over Newt's memories of what had happened, but they were short and a little scattered.

Newt still made no plans to go home. Despite how Tina had pulled away, he still couldn't leave her. He was walking down the street after a meeting with Picquery, case in hand, wondering if he should risk stopping by Jacob's bakery. He didn't think it would be a good idea, in the long run.

"Newt!"

He turned at the sound of his name. Tina was walking towards him, a hat on her head, her coat flapping in the blustery day. The street was pretty much deserted and before Newt could say anything she had grasped his arm and Apparated.

Newt wasn't where they had ended up at first, then realized it was the rooftop they had wound up on after escaping Macusa.

"I thought we'd gotten past you doing that." he said to Tina, switching the case from one hand to the other.

"I just . . . . I wanted us to be alone."

Tina seemed unsure and upset.

"Why, Tina?" Newt asked gently.

Tina took a deep breath, looking at him.

"I'm . . . . . . I'm pregnant, Newt." she said, staring at him with a vulnerable expression.

Newt just stared at her for a few moments. It took those few moments for the full weight of her words to settle. Pregnant. There was no chance it was his-he and Tina had never . . . . . He tried to think of something to say that was neutral.

"Are you certain?" he asked.

Tina nodded, closing her eyes for a moment as she did so.

"I went to the hospital today. I . . . I'd suspected for a while. I was getting sick for no reason and I missed . . . . ." Tina trailed off awkwardly for a moment. "The Healer confirmed it."

Tina stared at him.

"How do you feel about it?" Newt asked.

He didn't think they could move forward with this conversation without him knowing this. Tina gave him a tremulous hint of a smile that looked more like she was about to burst into tears.

"Honestly? I don't know."

"What are you doing to do, Tina?" Newt asked.

There were options. He couldn't blame her if she wanted to go with most drastic of them.

"I . . . . I think I want to keep it." Tina really did smile here, small and nervous. "Even with what happened to me . . . . it's a baby. My baby. I don't think I can just overlook that."

Newt nodded. He wasn't sure what else to say. Tina suddenly burst out laughing. This made Newt jump and he set the case down.

"What are you laughing at?"

Newt felt he'd missed something and was utterly confused by her laughter. Tina shook her head.

"I thought you might have taken off by now. I didn't get past this part of the conversation in my head."

"I'm not going to run, Tina. Not unless you want me to."

"I don't know if I do or not."

Tina's eyes welled with tears. Newt nodded.

"I need some time to figure this out. I . . . I'm hoping you can bear with me while I do."

"Of course I will, Tina."

"Thank you, Newt."

Tina gave him a gentle kiss on the lips for a moment before pulling away. They stood there and then Tina laughed again, the sound verging near a sob.

"I'm going to have a baby."

She looked terrified by the prospect. Newt nodded, taking her hand. He didn't say anything. He didn't think he needed to.


Author's Note: I know I covered a lot of time with this one, but I wanted to get it out of the way, mostly because I'm not really sure how rape would have been handled during this time period, especially in the wizarding world. Also, is anyone reading this?