Never Again, Again
Chapter 9
Christine woke up the next morning and realized that Hannah wasn't in the bed next to her. She immediately become worried. Even though they were on the ship and relatively safe, there were hazards everywhere. She started hyperventilating until she heard Mike and Hannah's voice in the office area. Christine walked into the office and smiled at Mike and Hannah, hoping she had calmed her breathing.
"Hey, Hannah woke up and wanted to go with me to see the bridge. I left a note out here." Mike said. He had been very understanding since she had admitted having trouble with Hannah and Christine knew she could be angry for him taking Hannah out so early, but he was only trying to help her.
"Did you have fun?" Christine asked the little girl.
"Yes." Hannah said, looking at her feet.
"She and I had a little talk." Mike said quietly.
"Oh." Christine said, knowing she should be ashamed of herself. It was not Hannah's fault that her own mother was struggling with her.
"Hannah, remember what I told you." Mike remarked before bending down and kissing Hannah's forehead. "Did you and Katie sleep okay?" Mike asked.
"Yes." Christine answered.
"Hannah, why don't you go in and see what Katie wants for breakfast? I need to talk to your mom for a second." Mike asked their daughter. She nodded and went into the bedroom. Mike shut the door behind her and led Christine to the couch.
"I bet that wasn't an easy conversation." Christine remarked.
"I didn't go into full detail. I just told her that you were sad because of how sick Katie is and because of Lucas. That you are not mad at her. I know that is kind of a lie because as I said; she cannot shoulder that. All I ask is if you start getting overwhelmed, call for me. If I can't get here, I will send someone to get Hannah out of the way. But, once we land; I will be deployed again. I think you are aware of this, but I will not be there to take care of Hannah and she is too young to take care of herself. My hope is we can get this resolved before then." Mike explained.
"I hope so too." Christine answered.
"She thinks you hate her. I told her you loved her but I am not sure she believes it, so you might have to fake it for a while. Hug her. Give her kisses. You have a distinct advantage because she still loves you and she is very excited about the baby." Mike said.
"Mike…please don't think I like this. I feel terrible about it." Christine said.
"I know. And I don't mean to sound badly when I say this, but my concern is not you right now. Mine is Hannah." Mike told her.
"I understand." Christine said just as Hannah came back into the bedroom.
"Katie wants pancakes if there's any." Hannah said.
"Okay. I will see." Mike answered. He winked at the little girl as she settled next to Christine.
"Do you want me to braid your hair this morning?" Christine asked Hannah after Mike had stepped out.
"S…sure." Hannah said with a timid voice.
"Can you get me your comb and hair ties?" Christine asked. She gave Hannah a fake smile, hoping the little girl didn't know she was faking. Hannah jumped up and ran into the bathroom, giving Christine a moment to collect herself. The baby was particularly active that morning and as soon as Hannah came back in, Christine took her hand and gently guided it to her belly. "Your dad said you were excited about the baby. I thought you might like to feel it kick." Christine said. Hannah was smiling slightly and Christine still had her hand over Hannah's much smaller one.
"Does it hurt?" Hannah asked.
"A little. Sometimes, but not always. I always loved how it felt." Christine answered.
"Even with me?" Hannah asked. It immediately hurt but it was an understandable question.
"Yes, honey; even with you." Christine answered. The smile she gave Hannah was a bit more genuine. She patted Hannah's cheek and grabbed the comb and hair ties. "Pigtails?" Christine asked as Hannah turned away from her so she could fix her hair.
"Yes, please." Hannah answered. Christine kissed the back of Hannah's head before she began combing the hair out, wondering is she could fake it.
