All familiar characters belong to Janet. Mistakes are solely mine.
Frank's answer fell like a stone ... one my menace-in-law immediately picked up to throw at my wife. Even though it was metaphorical, I angled my body to protect more of Stephanie's.
"You put him up to this," Helen accused.
"That's your problem, Mom. You need to give Dad way more credit than that. He gets a say in his own life. I admit, I've enjoyed spending time getting to know him, but I've told you both multiple times that I'm not interested in saving or splitting up your marriage. That's your issue to hash out. The only reason we're down here is this is my home and I wanna make sure you don't disrupt it, and Dad asked that you be let through the gate ..."
"Aha, see? He wanted to speak with me. Didn't you, Frank? Don't worry, I won't let Stephanie or her ... husband ... come between us."
I could see Shirley glance at Eddie, clearly not believing what she's witnessing ... Helen in full denial mode. "Uh, Aunt Helen? You seemed to have missed the part where Uncle Frank said he isn't leaving or living with you anymore."
"Nonsense. Frank was just saying what he thought you all wanted him to say. The truth will come out now. You didn't mean it. Tell them, Frank, that you didn't mean it."
"I don't know how you're doing it," I told her, "because Stephanie and you are nothing alike, but you seem to be confusing my wife and yourself. For decades Frank was telling you what you wanted to hear because it was easier than dealing with the fits you pitch. Stephanie is only reinforcing what he's already told you. It's your turn to listen to what he has to say."
"Ranger's right, Helen," my father-in-law told her. "I'm about done with keeping my mouth shut or saying what people expect me to."
"You go, Frank!" Edna whopped, slapping him on the back so enthusiastically, he was thrust forward almost an inch. "Tell her where to stick it!"
Eddie laughed until Shirley gave him the 'knock it off' look all husbands are familiar with.
"No one's sticking anything anywhere," Frank told her.
"Do not make a peep, Eddie," Steph told her friend. "I can hear an inappropriate joke forming from here."
That moment of brevity eased Frank's nerves. He was reminded that he has reinforcements if he needs them.
"Thank you, Frank," Helen said primly. "I appreciate that at least one person here has manners."
"Not that you'd believe me, but some of the politest young men I've ever met work upstairs."
That was definitely not what she was expecting or wanting him to say. "Well aren't you being nice for saying so."
It's clear to everyone that she didn't believe anyone associated with me could be polite and she's even angrier at Frank for pointing it out.
"I'm not being nice," he said. "I'm being honest. I like it here. I get to have breakfast or dinner with my daughter and granddaughter. Edna I have nightly Rummy games that sometimes switch to poker when one or a few of the men want to join us, and Ranger and his team have helped me a lot with Gioele's death."
"For heaven's sake, Frank! That man died more than thirty years ago. What is there to need help with?"
"I know this may shock you, Mom, not knowing what it's like to genuinely care about someone, but no matter how long it was ago a death was ... it still hurts."
"Tell me about it," Shirley said. "You know how my dear friend Josephine died of breast cancer almost six years ago. I still find myself picking up the phone to call and tell her something. You don't get over it, you just somehow get yourself through it every day."
My respect for Eddie went up when he placed an arm around his wife in support. I felt Steph's eyes on me after Shirley had repeated something similar to what she'd said before we left our apartment. A lot of people have lives or issues that they're forced to just get themselves through however they can.
"Turns out there were a lot of things I needed help to sort out," Frank continued. "Gioele was a big one, but I also realized how unhappy I was ..."
"Are you going to stand there and tell me that you're putting us through all of this because you're not 'happy'? Well I've got news for you, Frank, I'm not happy right now either."
"The difference is," Steph pointed out, "you actually enjoy being miserable. It's like you feed off of everyone's unhappiness to make yourself feel stronger. Dad, on the other hand, wants to get up every day and enjoy all twenty four hours in it."
"Which is what I'm doing here," he added. "I'm getting the medication and the support I need to have a life that doesn't revolve around a cab and a TV shoved in an out of the way corner."
"You're taking drugs!?"
"No," I was quick to correct. "Doctor prescribed medication to help regulate the chemicals in his brain. As much as I'd love to blame you for causing his depression, it's a medical condition that should be treated and respected accordingly. You're not going to make him feel ashamed for needing help, because Frank and everyone here know that there's nothing to be ashamed of. Something we can't say about you."
She knows she can't win an argument with me so she did what she always does ... pretended that what she doesn't like doesn't exist, and then went for a weaker target.
"Tell me, what exactly do you get here besides drugs and bouts of gambling that you can't have at home, Frank?"
As an answer to her question, he reached into his pocket and pulled a folded piece of paper out of his wallet. He unfolded the note but didn't hand it to her. It was as if he's afraid his wife's touch would destroy or contaminate it. He just held up the paper for her to read.
I could clearly make out from where I was standing the words Steph wrote for Olivia. 'Thank you for coming over and having breakfast with us. The poison ivy story you told made me laugh so hard ... a mouthful of cereal shot out of my mouth. Mama and Gunny had to clean it up, but they didn't mind because it made us laugh even harder.' The note ended with a stamped 'Love, Olive' that has a unicorn beside her name and an olive branch underlining both.
My wife shrugged when she felt Eddie and Shirley's eyes shoot to her. "Our baby can't write yet, so I thought of a way for her to express her thoughts or appreciation for the people around her. I write what we're all feeling, and I hand her the stamp we had made for her. It may be upside down or sideways at times, but she loves the sound and picture the stamp makes when she's 'signing' her name to a 'Thank you' or an 'I love you' card/note. It's not a big deal."
Instead of making fun of her as she'd expected, Eddie appeared annoyed.
"Why the hell haven't I gotten a note like that from "Olive"?" He asked. "I let her wear my hat and hold my badge every time I see her. That deserves a 'Love, Olive' something."
"Don't swear, Eddie," Shirley chastised.
"Sorry, honey. But answer the question," he said to my wife.
"Change the tone," I ordered him.
"Jesus, a guy can't catch a break around here."
"With everything going on," Steph told him, "we haven't had much of a chance to get together, but I promise after what you guys are doing for us, you and Shirley will get weekly Thank Yous with multiple 'Love, Olive' stamps on it."
"We'd better or I'm going to let Shirley have at sharing how you reneged on a deal. I wanna see the munchkin, so can we wrap this up? Mrs. Plum, Mr. Plum doesn't appear to want to leave with you, so that means you're going to have to."
She was shaking her head before he finished speaking. "No. I don't accept this."
In the silence that followed you could hear the click of Edna's dentures being moved around and then slid back into place.
"Tough turnips, Helen," she said. "You don't got a say in what Frank does or doesn't do now."
"Unless your plan is to kidnap Uncle Frank," Shirley pressed. "And you wouldn't want to do anything illegal just to get people to stop talking about you two being separated now. My Eddie is a police officer and he would have to arrest you if you did something like that, and that would put our family in a really awkward position. It would definitely be bigger news at the deli than just Uncle Frank needing antidepressants and a break from you."
We all heard the lobby door open and turned in unison to see who came out of the building. Knowing Tank will keep Olivia inside until I tell him otherwise, had me not caring who it was. Everyone here is on Stephanie's side, so that lessens the concern about interruptions ... from the inside of the building anyway.
"What's going on?" One Shot asked. "Your housekeeper ..."
"Ella isn't our housekeeper," Steph cut him off to say, "she's the heart and soul of Rangeman and the mother figure we all love."
"Fair enough. The 'heart and soul' of the place basically ordered me to go grab a snack on five - she believes I've been underfed I think - and I saw this party on a monitor as I was walking by. You need me for something?"
Steph's anger changed course. "No," she told him. "It's a family matter."
"Awww ... and here I thought by being allowed to move in meant I'm a member of it now."
"I'm sorry that your brain had to be put through the effort of thinking that. You aren't."
Helen made the mistake of gloating. "Are you hearing what your daughter just said, Frank? Living here doesn't make you family. Apparently not all of your new friends are polite or likable."
"Knock it off, Mom. Dad is both blood and handpicked family. He and Grandma belong here, you don't. And our guys have better manners and more morals than you and the Church group combined. My beef with Atlas has nothing to do with Dad's living arrangements or how great the rest of the Rangeguys are. If I had a mother I could talk to, you'd know what's going on."
She's still holding a grudge against Atlas, but the fact that she didn't call him One Shot in front of her mother is a good sign. No doubt the bitch would have zeroed in on the whys and hows of his nickname and begin another argument as a distraction about how 'sinister' my people are so she won't have to address her own deficiencies. Steph would hate to have to defend Atlas, but she'd do it in a heartbeat just so her mother couldn't attack the people who have always been good to her.
"Steph has you there," Shirley said. "Mrs. Markowitz told me that even Valerie has been accidentally not picking up your calls now."
"I'll help you out, Helen. That makes Stephanie, Valerie, Frank, and myself," Edna added, ticking names off on her bony fingers, "not wanting to talk to you. It's funny that those same people are all talking to each other, but not to you. I wonder what ... or who ... the real problem is?" She looked up at me. "I don't know what I did wrong with this one, but I'm glad it skipped a generation. Stephanie and Valerie have some sense, unlike my daughter."
"Maybe some people are just born heartless," Steph said, flicking her eyes in her mother's direction, "and some become that way all on their own."
The last part was said with a glare aimed at One Shot.
He glanced heavenward for a moment, but when nothing struck him dead like Steph clearly wished would happen, he tried to look less guilty about his past profession. It didn't work, but at least he has better acting skills than Helen. Her placating look and polite tone are as fake as her love for her husband and children.
"I assure you, Stephanie, that I do have a heart," Mrs. Plum stated. "It's just one that is tired of being disappointed or getting trampled on. It's as if I didn't have enough to worry about with this pandemic, I can't talk to my family, or even visit them it appears, to make sure that they're all safe."
"Hey, you can skip the 'poor abused me' act," Atlas told her. "No one's buying it and it's just making you look even nuttier. You run your house like a prison and treat people like they're your personal staff. And from the looks of it, they're tired of your shit. Either change or kiss them goodbye. It's that simple, though it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that you're gonna find something to bitch about either way. Go on home and pour yourself a double of whatever you're into." He paused to study her. "I'd peg you for a closet whiskey or gin guzzler, something strong enough to get the job done quickly that can also be hidden inside another drink easily. And while you're knocking it back you can get started admitting to yourself that you're the reason your family is all jumping ship. A better option for everybody would be for you to get yourself evaluated before you cause a problem I guarantee you won't walk away unscathed from."
Steph's mouth dropped open and all she could do was stare at him for a few beats as she tried to figure out what she wanted to say. "Have you met my mother before? Oh I know, the guys must've filled you in on her and why she's here."
He shrugged. "No to both. One of my foster mothers was just like that," he said, pointing the top of his water bottle at Helen. "I'm using the noun 'mother' here, not the warm fuzzy definition of a mom that you apply to Ella. I can spot the signs and similarities a mile away now. Why do you think I ran away so many times? There was less drama on the streets."
My wife absorbed that information for a moment before she glanced up at me. "Shoot him," she ordered.
I wrapped my arms around her. "I need a reason, Babe. I'm sorry to say that unmasking your mother and telling her off isn't going to be it."
"That's the problem. You need to kill him before I start liking him for being happy to point out her flaws, like she used to do to me, without worrying about sounding or being offensive."
My wife earned a salute, not an accusatory point like Helen had received, from his bottle of water. "It's my pleasure, Mrs. Manoso."
Her blue eyes narrowed and sparked in a beautiful but dangerous way. "Don't 'Mrs. Manoso' me. I'm not ready to bury the past. Not now, and like my Dad just said ... maybe not ever."
He spread his arms wide, not worried at all. "I've got nothing but time, you'll come around. Knowing what we have in common, you may start to see that having a man with my particular skills hanging around could come in handy. You may think I have no conscience, and you're probably right about that one, but I know everything there is to know about loyalty. As long as you're married to Ranger, you're stuck with my protection."
I didn't have to hear the words to know what she's thinking. When she agreed to marry me, we both promised each other that ours will be a 'Bat Cave Forever' marriage. That prospect appealed greatly to her, but hearing a lifetime commitment coming out of One Shot's mouth definitely had a different effect on her.
