"Never do that again." Shepard's groggy voice spoke as she slowly sat up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
Garrus looked at her from where he'd been sitting beside her on the bed in her cabin. He set the datapad he'd been flipping through on the beside table. "What's that now?"
"It's what you said to me when we got into the shuttle." She leaned her head on his shoulder, "You're not one for giving orders. At least…not outside the bedroom," she teased with a smirk.
"I've never been that scared before," he said plainly, "And I dragged your ass into that shuttle Shepard."
She frowned, hearing the tone in his voice. "You're angry." It wasn't a question, and she sat up again to look at him.
"I…" he started, then took her hand into his, "Yes," he answered honestly, his eyes meeting hers, "But also relieved."
"Garrus." Her frown deepened, "I will always be running into the fire. You know that."
"Sure, but since day one, I have always been able to run in behind you. You plunged into that water, and I couldn't follow you." He squeezed her hand, the pain he felt written all over his face, "When we lost communication with you, I thought you were gone. And I was stuck on the surface, calculating how far you could have sunk and wondering if I could dive deep enough."
"Garrus," she spoke softly, as she searched his eyes, "If this is too much for you…"
"No," he cut her off. He pressed his forehead to hers and they closed their eyes. Sitting in silence. Enjoying the few brief moments where they were able to be quietly together.
"How long was I asleep for?" she asked finally.
"Twelve hours," Garrus answered dryly.
Shepard's eyes flew open, and she jumped out of bed, "No! I can't sleep that long! Why didn't you wake me? I have…"
"Things to do?" Garrus finished for her as he stood and crossed his arms over his chest. He watched her rush up the stairs to the bathroom.
"Yes!" she glanced over her shoulder to yell to him before turning the water on in the sink. "I need to get to the Citadel. I have to…"
"Drop off some banners, some books, a statue of some sort?" He walked causally up the steps and leaned on the bathroom door. "Liara took care of it. And while I appreciate you obtaining that sample of Cerberus poison for the doctors at Huerta Memorial…that Turian General is going to make it by the way, I guess I need to remind you that you can't help everyone Shepard."
She shot him a look before cupping water in her hands and splashing her face, "I know that. But if we're out there scanning for war assets, recruiting research teams, and saving diplomats, the least we can do is bring back some things that'll help the moral of the soldiers out there fighting."
She turned the water off and dried her face before looking at herself in the mirror.
"I wonder…do you have a trinket that improves your moral Shepard?" the turian asked, the plate over his eye raised.
Shepard smirked and glanced at him. Her eyes moved over his body as she took him in, then looked into his. "Something like that."
Garrus chuckled then moved to stand beside her, "Look at that," he gently touched her cheek with the back of his hand and turned her head to look at herself in the mirror, "The dark circles are almost gone. Funny what a little sleep can do for someone."
She shot him another look in the mirror, but his reflection only smiled back at her. "I have an entire galaxy depending on my Garrus. I can't afford sleep."
His smile faltered and he nodded once, "Were you thinking about the galaxy counting on you, when you put on that faulty old suit and plunged yourself into the water?"
Shepard saw his face in the mirror and turned around now, leaning back on the sink. "Of course, I did," she answered looking at him now, though he still stared into the mirror. "I did that for this war, for those people."
"And if you had died Shepard?" Garrus asked, finally moving his head to look at her, sorrow filled eyes looking into hers, "How would you have saved anyone?"
She looked back into his eyes, feeling the pain her decision had caused him. She gently took his hand in hers and held it. "Then I left a very good team of people behind. One that could figure out how to win this war without me."
"Heh," Garrus laughed despite himself.
"What?" Shepard's eyebrows furrowed, confused by his response.
"These people you count on well…" he moved in front of her, taking both of her hands in his now and brought them up to kiss them softly, "We also have a trinket that helps with our moral Shepard and we're not going to be able to scan any planets to bring it back to us once it's gone."
"Where did you go?" Liara asked softly from where she set beside her turian friend.
The Alliance were happy to offer the group a small ship, along with the greatest pilot in the galaxy, to investigate the location of Shepard's omnitool. EDI of course tagged along, as well as Vega, Cortez, Javik, and Kaiden. Others wanted to join, but the process to rebuild had them tied up.
"Hmm?" The sound of the asari's voice brought Garrus out of his thoughts and he looked at the people who set around the conference table with him. They'd been discussing the best place to begin looking for the Commander and it was obvious Garrus's thoughts had traveled elsewhere. "Sorry, I was just thinking."
Liara could read the distress on his face, and she looked up at the others, "Can we have minute?"
Without objection the others nodded and stood, stepping out of the small conference room, closing the door behind them.
"That's not necessary. I'm ok." Garrus attempted to assure her with the wave of a hand.
Liara studied him for a moment, then turned in her seat to face him. Making sure he understood this wasn't mission oriented…it was a genuine personal interaction. She wasn't making sure his head was in the game as a member of his team, she wanted to make sure he knew she was his friend and she wanted him to be ok. "Garrus, you're here because of me."
He shook his head, "I'm here for Shepard," he answered, but his eyes never left the table.
"Because of what I found," she corrected him, and he shot her a look before staring at the table once again. "I had a chance to talk with Victus while I was waiting for you to gather your things on Palaven. I know you haven't given yourself a chance to grieve."
"I haven't…" he started, but she cut him off.
"Had the time?" It wasn't really a question; it was something she understood all too well. "You do now and you're with the people who understand your pain better than anyone." She shifted in her seat and carefully took his hand in hers, "So tell me, not as your teammate, not as that immature asari you rescued from a prothean device on Therum…"
Garrus interrupted with a bit of a chuckle, "You were just…hanging there," he waved his free hand in front of his face as he remembered, "Like a fly caught in one of those sticky traps the humans use."
Liara laughed a bit herself, "I remember it clearly thank you. There is no need to remind me."
The turian grinned at her now, "I'm glad Shepard was able to save you with that laser and we didn't accidently cause the whole building the crash down on you."
"I am as well."
The pair shared a laugh and as it fizzled out Liara continued, "Talk to me as your friend Garrus."
After a moment, the turian cleared his throat, deciding to take Liara up on her offer to listen.
"I was thinking about what happened after we found Leviathan," he started and Liara leaned her shoulder against the back of her chair, still holding his hand as she listened closely. "I don't know that I have ever been angry with her, but I was then. I was angry the moment she jumped into that water." He turned and looked to the table again as the memory played like a vid in his head. "She didn't hesitate…not that she ever did. And I know she didn't have time to hesitate, I know that." He snapped a little as he looked at her, as if she was going to scold him for being selfish.
"I wasn't going to say anything," Liara assured him.
He looked back at the table again, finding some relief in her words. "I thought after our date on the Presidium, after she told me she loved me, that maybe seeing me would give her even just a little pause." He tensed up and moved to take his hand away, but the asari didn't let go. "After some time, I realized I wasn't angry with her…I was angry with me. She jumped in that water without hesitation. That could have been my last moment with her…and I had never told her I loved her."
Liara raised an eyebrow, "Garrus, you have announced on many occasions how Shepard is the love of your life. You have never been shy about how you felt about her. I am sure you have said it plenty of times since."
"No," he shook his head, "I hadn't said the words, Liara. I teased her with them, but I hadn't said them." He looked to her now, "I want to blame it on turian nature, but…I had the time to say them, and I didn't."
"Garrus…" she said softly and leaned in a little, "She knew…"
"She hesitated." His eyes moved back to the table. "She climbed the ramp to the ship to drag me up there. She told me she loved me and then for the first time since I met her she hesitated." He couldn't help but beat himself up. "She waited to hear me say it. She waited until I told her I loved her too and then she turned and ran away from me. She hesitated because…"
"She knew it would be the last words she ever heard from you," Liara finished for him.
"I didn't say it because, I could never convince myself that that woman cared about me." He looked at her again, "She gave her life twice for this galaxy and I'm the man she wanted to spend her time with? And I selfishly withheld the only words she wanted to hear so desperately…that she hesitated."
Liara opened her mouth to speak, but was interrupted when Glyph flew in. "Shadow Broker, I have a message for you from Urdnot Wrex on Tuchanka."
The asari waved at him, "Not now Glyph."
"No, it's alright." Garrus pulled his hand from Liara's now, "We're nearly there and I need to get my head back in this."
"Garrus," Liara scolded him softly.
"I promise, I'll take time to grieve after we recover whatever is here," he assured her, knowing what she was thinking.
"Yes, you will," she turned in her seat again, facing the table now. "I will make sure of it."
Garrus smiled at her but said nothing else.
"Shall I play the message now?"
"Yes Glyph," Liara answered, glancing once at Garrus.
The message was a bit staticky and there was a lot of shouting in the background, but Wrex's voice was one neither of them had heard for months and they were happy to hear from him.
"Is this thing working?" he shouted, clearly asking the operator, and both Liara and Garrus chuckled in response. "Hey Liara, it's Wrex. I was just about to head out and meet you, but a couple of the larger clans started butting heads. I had to stay behind to make sure they didn't start another civil war. Keep me updated with your coordinates and if I can get things to settle down here on Tuchanka, I'll be there to help. If not," there was a long silence and when he spoke again, there was an uncharacteristic sadness in his tone, "Let me know what you find ok? If you bring her body back, there's a line of Krogan who want to carry that casket." A pain pierced Garrus's chest as the realization hit him. If they were to find Shepard's body, it would be the last time he would ever see her. There was another long silence as Wrex thought about what else he could say, but nothing came to him. There was nothing else. "Wrex out," he said finally, and the message ended.
Liara glanced at Garrus, wishing she had the words to comfort him. "The Krogan might be disappointed to hear that there is a galaxy of people who would sign up to carry that casket."
Garrus didn't answer, just stared at the table again as he suffered a familiar pain and lost himself in his thoughts.
"So, Be'ala's cute," Vega shrugged from where he set across from Garrus in the shuttle. The eyes of his squad mates moved from where they were checking their weapons, to him.
Cortez sighed, "Not now James," he scolded him from where he piloted the shuttle.
"What?" James cried as he looked to the others for some back up. "I'm just saying. She's cute for a turian…I guess…well it's not like I know what the turian definition of attractive is." He paused and looked to Garrus now, "Unless, I mean are you just into human women now? Is…is that how this works or…"
"I believe when Victus asked the group to speak to Garrus about potentially moving on and finding happiness, this is not what he had in mind," EDI spoke over her shoulder to James from where she sat in the seat next to Cortez.
"I think when Victus asked us to help Garrus, he also didn't intend for us to tell Garrus that he asked us to help," Kaiden sighed as he fidgeted uncomfortably with his gun.
"Doctor Michele," James shouted as if he had figured something out, "She was always buying you chocolates and calling the Normandy to check on you. She's human."
Garrus looked at Javik, "Can I trust you to shoot me in the head as soon as we get off this shuttle?"
"You want your pain to end. I am happy to help," Javik nodded.
"No!" Liara shouted, "He is not serious." She looked around at the rest of the group, "And we are not doing this. I am sure the General means well, but this is not the time."
A silence fell over the shuttle, but it was brief.
"I uh…I'm sorry. I'm not really good with this stuff you know?" James apologized, looking at Garrus again. "I just wanted to help."
Garrus looked around the shuttle, "I appreciate that all of you want to help me, but I am about all helped out." He stood now, "Victus wants me to move on, Liara wants me to grieve, you all want me to be happy. Everyone wants something from me. What I want is to find what we need to find here and then go home. I want to sit with my pain, I want to miss her, but I will never want to replace her."
"Technically you wouldn't be replacing her," Kaiden started, but Garrus cut him off.
"I'm not looking to move on." He looked to James, "And I will find happiness in repairing the galaxy she gave her life to save."
"Shepard helped me find myself again after I lost Robert," Cortez spoke now, "She helped me let him go. Garrus is right, it's important to find happiness when the one you love is gone, but that doesn't mean you need to find it in someone else. You need to find it in you."
Everyone fell silent again as they considered his words.
"I don't think any of us have finished grieving," Kaiden spoke after some time. "We just haven't been around each other much since that day and none of us know how to address the other's pain."
"Well, if you really want to help me," Garrus said as he reached up and took the handle above his head, "Help me find closure here."
"For not just you…for all of us," Liara spoke up. They all glanced at each other in silent agreement. "Glyph, what are we looking at here."
Glyph appeared from the console and floated to the center of the group, "There is an outpost up ahead. The structure above ground is small, but there are four levels underneath the ground housing fifty-two heat signatures." A holographic map appeared in front of them, "I was able to collect this information before one of the turian guards saw me and chased me off."
"Did you see…anything else?" James asked carefully, hoping Glyph would catch on to what he really wanted to know.
"I did not recognize anyone in particular, if that is what you are wanting to know James Vega," Glyph replied as it spun to face him.
"What about AA guns? Any weaponry outside that could take down the shuttle?" Cortez asked now as he slowed, they were only a couple hundred yards from their destination.
"There are two armed human males outside the surface structure, both carrying the M-8 Avenger model assault rifles and dressed in basic Alliance armor."
"Alliance?" Kaiden asked quickly, "Are they Alliance soldiers?"
"There is significant damage repair on their armor that would signify if had been used in heavy fire."
"It is possible than, that those men have taken that armor from fallen Alliance soldiers. Not necessarily that they themselves are Alliance," EDI chimed in.
"And I doubt the Alliance would so willingly lend us a ship and a pilot to track this down if they were involved in any way," Liara added.
"Stealing armor from dying or dead Alliance soldiers. One more reason to hate these guys," James spoke now.
The shuttle came to a stop only fifty yards from the twelve by twelve building and the team jumped to the ground, clearly far more heavily armed and armored than the men who guarded it.
"Head back a good ways in case we need some air support Cortez," Kaiden instructed.
"You got it Sir," Cortez replied and spun the shuttle around, flying back the way they came.
As the group approached the two guards, they stood strong, and appeared unfazed by the very soldiers that had gone through hell and back to save the galaxy.
"Stop right there!" one of them shouted, his voice broken. His helmet could hide the fear on his face, but his voice was giving it away. "Who are you?"
"Who…are we?" Kaiden asked with an eyebrow raised, "You don't get out much do you?"
"We know who you are," the other soldier spoke now, larger than his companion. "You're the team from the Normandy. You stopped the Reapers."
"With a lot of help," Liara spoke calmly. The others stopped and only she took a few more steps forward, "We are not here because we want any trouble. We think you found something that belonged to a friend of ours."
"If you aren't asking for trouble, then put your weapons down!" the larger man shouted. His helmet squealed. The repairs done to his armor were far from perfect.
Liara looked to the group behind her, "It is ok." The group lowered their weapons but didn't drop them. "That is the best we can give you."
The men didn't lower their weapons, they just shifted uncomfortably and aimed them at the Asari. She stopped moving and put her hands up.
James growled and moved to lift his weapon again, but Kaiden set his hand on it and pushed it back down. "They don't get to threaten her like that," James spoke quietly.
"I don't like it either, but she's capable. We need to trust her."
Kaiden's words gave James no comfort, but he did as he was instructed.
"You found an omnitool. It belonged to Commander Shepard." She glanced again at her group, then back to the men. "You can keep the omnitool, we don't need it. We just wanted to know how you got it? Did you find it on…" she hesitated, not on purpose, it was just difficult to say. "Did you find it on…her?"
"On her body," an Asari spoke as she stepped out of the small building behind the guards. Unlike the others, her armor was pristine, and her weapon heavily moded. "Is that what you wanted to hear? You can go now."
"No," Liara called after her as she turned to go back into the building. Annoyed, the asari turned to face her again. "Where is her body now? Do you have her? Did you leave her where you found the omnitool?" The asari looked unmoved by Liara's emotional plea and didn't answer. "Please, we are only here for Shepard's body. If you have it or if you know where we can find it…we will take it and we will leave."
"Or we could kill you all and take your omnitools too," the asari shrugged.
"This team has taken down Reapers, Collectors, Cerberus…there are only fifty-two of you. How do you feel about your odds?" Garrus asked now, his patience waning.
"I wouldn't like those odds," Kaiden added as he lifted his gun again and the others followed suit.
The asari seemed surprised by their knowledge of how many soldiers she had inside. Scaring them wasn't going to work, she knew that now.
The blue biotic glow appeared around Liara's hands, and she stared daggers into the eyes of the asari that stood between her and finding her friend. "I tried to ask nicely."
The asari put her hands up and took a step back, "Alright. Give me a minute." She turned and went back inside, the door locking behind her.
The guns immediately moved, directed at the two guards now and both lowered their own. "I hope she hurries," Liara spat, "Or we'll need to go through the two of you to get inside there."
Some time passed, too much time. It was everything in the squad not to burst through the doors to see what the holdup was. Finally, the door opened and two turian men carried out a cloth covered stretcher, the asari from before and three other well-armed guards stepped out behind them.
"There isn't much left of her. She was burned badly when we found her. To be honest, we didn't even know who she was." The men set the stretcher on the ground in front of Liara, then made their way back to the asari. "We found that out pretty quickly though, when we activated the omnitool. No doubt that's when you pinged her location," she shot one of the guards beside her a look. "We didn't mean any harm we just wanted to study her implants. See what it was that Cerberus had done to her. We hoped to use that technology for ourselves or sell it."
Liara leaned down and gently pulled back the sheet, her body shielding the view from the others behind her. "Well, sorry to disappoint." She looked over her friend and what they had said was true, she was burned so badly it was difficult to identify her. "EDI," she replaced the sheet, "Help me carry her. The rest of you, don't lower your guns."
EDI moved quickly to the stretcher and lifted one end as Liara took the other.
The asari put her hands up, "We don't want any trouble either. We looked her over, but her implants are so badly damaged we wouldn't be able to learn anything from them either. That's why we figured it wasn't worth losing lives. We'd just give her back to you."
"You're so kind," Kaiden spat before touching his earpiece, "Cortez, we need a pickup."
"On it," he responded quickly and was there in moments.
Liara didn't look back as she carried the stretcher behind her toward the shuttle, the others still training their guns on the opposing group.
"Liara," EDI started, but Liara cut her off.
"Not now EDI."
"But Liara," EDI persisted.
Liara glanced back at her, "Now is not the time," she snipped, tears hanging in her blue eyes. "Please."
EDI only nodded and helped Liara lift the stretcher into the shuttle.
Liara was knelt beside the cloth covered stretcher, running her omnitool over the body.
Garrus stood, gripping the handle above his head, his body swayed as the shuttle moved and his eyes stayed on the cloth covered head of the woman he loved.
"At least we found her," Kaiden was the first to speak. "We can take her home and finally put her to rest."
"Liara," EDI spoke from the front seat, glancing back at her. "Can I talk about it now?"
The asari wiped the tear from her eye and stood, "Yes EDI. We can talk about how not only is this not Shepard, it is not even human. It is asari."
All eyes were on Liara now.
"What do you mean it's not Shepard?" Kaiden stood now and knelt beside the stretcher, pulling the cloth back. The burns were so severe that not much remained of the body. With a quick look, the body could be that of a human woman.
Garrus watched Kaiden, "What would be the point of lying to us? And trying to convince us that this is Shepard's body?"
"Desperation," Liara answered, sitting down in the seat Kaiden had just left. "They know something, or they are hiding something."
"Why not just tell you they didn't see Shepard's body at all then? Why give you fake one?" Cortez asked now.
"They probably figured we wouldn't believe them and would insist on checking their facility ourselves," Kaiden answered, covering the body again before sitting back and leaning against the shuttle wall.
"If they are this desperate to get rid of us…then we need to go back there and find out why," Garrus said as he looked to Liara.
The asari nodded, "Then we get back to the ship, regroup, and come up with a plan. They have her body in there I know it, and we're going to get it back."
