Never Again, Again
Chapter 28
Katie just kind of swallowed the news but Hannah was another story. Mike had already left to go back to Florida to get the baby, so it was up to Christine to tell the girls that they had a new little sister. Christine found Hannah in her room, staring into space.
"He just called. He's landed in Florida. It might take him a day or so to get things squared away. Traveling with a baby isn't easy either." Christine said.
"And you're just okay with this?" Hannah asked.
"No, honey. I'm mad as hell but I still love him. And I know one way or another, we have to solve this, even if he and I don't stay together. I glossed over what was going on health wise with him, he needs to be here though." Christine said.
"For who?" Hannah asked.
"James and Julia. And for you and Katie. If this is as bad as the doctor thinks, you will need your dad." Christine answered.
"Do you honestly think he will stick around?" Hannah asked.
"I do. We just have to welcome him back and treat that baby well. And she is innocent. She's already had her fair share of tragedy." Christine remarked.
"You don't have the energy to be dealing with a seven-month-old." Hannah said.
"No, I don't. And your dad will be caring for her." Christine answered.
"Yeah, right." Hannah said.
"You know; I think deep down, you do blame him for what happened to you. You went through twenty-two hours of hell. You can go out and be around people. You even went on a date a while back, but the one missing piece has been your dad." Christine said. Hannah stood up and paced around.
"That was his choice." Hannah remarked.
"Yes, it was but I think he was terrified there would be a day that you would reject him. The missing piece to your recovery is your dad. He can come back, and you reject him, using this baby as an excuse, or you can rise above what happened and treat him with forgiveness and grace, because if I don't make it, its going to leave you alone." Christine explained.
"Katie, James and Julia would still be around." Hannah said.
"Yes, but Katie doesn't have the energy for not forgiving your dad. And he'll have custody of James and Julia." Christine argued.
"You know, when I was taken—one of the men said that my dad would never look at me the same way. He was right." Hannah answered.
"That is right. But instead of fear, he can look at you in pride." Christine answered. She stood up and kissed Hannah's forehead before leaving her to think about what was said.
Three days later, the doorbell rang again and Christine answered it again. This time too, it was Mike but this time, he was carrying a car seat.
"Can I still come in?" Mike asked. Christine opened the door and let him in. He also had a suitcase in his other hand, but she wasn't sure if they were his belongings or the baby's. As soon as he sat the car seat down, the baby woke and began crying.
"She's probably hot and mostly likely wet." Christine said. Mike lifted the baby out of the carrier but was clearly uncomfortable with her. Christine felt sorry for the poor little mite. "Here?" Christine said as she reached for the baby. Mike handed her over while he got a diaper and wipes out.
"She only fell asleep once we got in the taxi. She cried the entire flight." Mike admitted. Christine sat down and unfastened the diaper cover. The baby smiled happily at Christine as she changed the diaper.
"She is small for her age." Christine remarked.
"She was two months premature." Mike answered.
"I see. She is sure tiny. I think ours were this size at four months. But developmentally, she's tracking where she should be." Christine said as she tickled the baby's belly.
"I suppose that's good." Mike remarked.
"Okay, I assume you don't have many supplies for her?" Christine asked. She had laid the baby on her legs and was getting all kinds of smiles and coos.
"Just a few sleepers and such? Some onesies. A pack of diapers, wipes and her favorite blanket."
"Okay. Go to the attic and get the crib down. I saved Julia's because I figured in a few years, we'd be grandparents. It'll need to be cleaned. Once either Katie or Hannah get home, you can go and get what she needs. I plain don't feel good and don't want to leave the house. I can look after Carly." Christine ordered.
"Is…everything okay?" Mike asked.
"No, Mike. I had chemo yesterday and its rough." Christine said.
"You know…the nanny said she could never get her to laugh or smile. I couldn't either. I've seen her smile more with you than she has with anyone." Mike said.
"It's a mother's touch." Christine remarked. The baby had Mike's coloring, reminding her of Katie when she was a baby.
"Yeah, I think sometimes she is missing that." Mike said as he sat down next to Christine. It was the closest he'd been, and Carly gave him a smile.
"I'm sure that her mother would have adored her." Christine said.
"Actually, no. Paige didn't want a baby. She would have had an abortion had it still been legal. She hated being pregnant." Mike said.
"You cared about her?" Christine asked.
"NO. I was lonely. I was afraid to come home for fear of Hannah rejecting me. That you would end up blaming me for what happened to her. She was someone I met at a charity thing. On the surface, she seemed nice. But she wasn't." Mike explained.
"Oh?" Christine encouraged.
"I was really lonely, and things progressed. Then she told me she was pregnant. Was insistent that the baby was mine. I was due to ship out on a tour. Then I received word that Paige had gone into premature labor. She died due to hemorrhaging." Mike continued.
"And you were away?" Christine asked.
"Yeah. The one fortunate thing was that Paige was wealthy. Very wealthy. She had changed her will that the baby would inherit everything and I would be executor. So, remotely, I was able to hire a nanny and set the baby and her up in an apartment while liquidating Paige's house and other belongings. Carly didn't need those things." Mike said.
"And that explains why I never noticed any change to the bank account." Christine remarked.
"Exactly. I never wanted to take anything away from you or the kids. I wanted to make sure you all were taken care of." Mike answered.
"Except you. We missed you." Christine said.
"Maybe you and Katie. Hannah, probably not so much." Mike remarked.
"Don't count her out." Christine told him.
"When I left home that last time, I hugged and kissed you, Katie and the twins. When I got to Hannah, I kissed her forehead and told her that I loved her, but she lowered her eyes. I suppose I took that as a rejection." Mike said.
"She was ashamed because she knew you knew what had happened to her." Christine said.
"I missed you all, you know?" Mike said.
"And we missed you. Did you care about Paige at all?" Christine asked. It determined a lot.
"No. And frankly, I don't love Carly yet. I am sure I will and can. I just can't let her be raised by some nanny. As you said, she was paid to care for her but not necessarily love her. But, it's a lot to ask of you. And, I am thinking you are not telling me everything about your cancer." Mike explained.
"I went in for my yearly exam. Something came back irregular and they did further tests. Those came back as cancer. Initially, they thought they got it all but they aren't certain, hence the aggressive chemo and radiation. They did the surgery and it seemed contained but the lymph nodes seemed agitated. The biopsies were clear but they are still nervous." Christine explained.
"So, I may lose you?" Mike asked. She was struck by the emotion in his voice.
"That's not in my plans but we'll see. We need to be prepared." Christine answered. She reached over and rubbed Mike's back.
"Christine…it was never because I didn't love you. I know I've done somethings that said I didn't and bringing home another woman's child is not fair to you but I always loved you." Mike said.
"I love you too. I should have pushed harder to insist you come home. That it would be okay. As far as Carly is concerned, every child deserves to be loved. There are worse things in the world and she's already had a rough start. Its time she has two parents that love her and will protect her." Christine said. Mike reached over and kissed her temple.
"You are such a special person. I've always known it, but it is so apparent now." Mike remarked.
"Mike, its all going to be okay. Now, go get that crib. This baby girl is going to want a proper nap soon." Christine said. She had picked the baby back up off her lap was cuddling her close.
"Thank you." Mike said. He kissed her forehead and left her on the couch with the baby, who Christine was cuddling with and the weird part was, she didn't mind in the least.
