Historia felt her thoughts cut out for a moment when Eren stopped explaining himself.
She felt a pang of betrayal when it became apparent that he told the Commander, who was in the room with a handful of other Scouts, about her blood and now she was more or less being forced to become Queen of the Walls.
Or at least that's what she would be thinking about had he not just completely shattered and crushed her entire world view into dust at the reveal that there's are entire other civilisations beyond the Walls who want them all to perish at the hands of the Titans.
It was all far too much for her in all honesty, how are they supposed the fight the world? How are they going to survive when faced with such a powerful enemy?
Oh that's right.
"So you need me to inherit a Titan to draw out the Founders power?" She spoke in mild resignation. Truthfully the idea of living for thirteen more years and no more terrified her and she really didn't want to do it, however what terrified her more than anything was losing her friends, the ones she cares about.
Ymir, Sasha, Connie, Jean, Armin, Mikasa and Eren. They're all so important to her in different ways, the thought of dying an early death is scary, the idea of losing them is so far beyond that though.
To her surprise though he immediately shut down that idea.
"No, you don't need to inherit a Titan and cut down your life." He simply spoke as though she wasn't even allowed to go through with such an idea.
Historia looked confused at this. Don't get her wrong, she's glad that she's not going to be forced to cut down her lifespan and be eaten in order to maintain her power, but what other options do they have?
Seeing her confusion Erwin immediately spoke up." You don't need to inherit a Titan, at least not for the moment. Whilst you are of Eldian royal blood you aren't the only member of the royal family that still lives besides your father. There are two other members with one being a Titan Shifter and the other being a Pure Titan. If those two are indeed alive then you won't need to inherit one of the nine."
The blonde girl internally sighed in relief but had another concern to voice." So once my father is taken down am I going to need to ascend the throne?"
The Scouts looked at each other for a moment but Eren decided to flatly and bluntly say." Yes, it'd be the best way to get the population on our side, to have the one sitting on the throne be one of our own."
A few Scouts looked at Eren as though he said something wrong however he either didn't care or didn't show that he cared. Historia was annoyed that the Scouts and Eren thought that they could just use her like a puppet... but saw the necessity of such a course of action, her being on the throne would be a good way to win over the people, they'd see her as the rightful heir to the throne, and she was, and thus wouldn't act out against the military if they were to overthrow the royal family.
However it might wound her pride it looks like the best course of action for the Walls, the people are fine with who's ruling, she doesn't have to be burdened with being a ruler, at least not mostly, and she doesn't have to even inherit a Titan.
Plus the Scouts, whilst a touch eccentric, seem like good people, and Eren can vouch for them and she trusts him.
"If you really don't wan-"
"I'll do it." She cut Eren off immediately as he started to offer another way out.
Her sudden answer seemed to surprise Eren and the Scouts and in response she smiled tensely and grabbed her forehead.
"I'll be honest that this whole situation is insane and I don't know everything and I really don't want to be Queen but-" she sighed sadly and looked her green eyed friend in the eye.
"I doubt that you wanted any of this responsibility, Eren, but still you've done your best and didn't run away from biting the bullet, I don't think I could look myself in the mirror if I didn't try and carry that burden with you."
Because as much as she doesn't want to be saddled with the weight of being the Walls ruler she do- no she knows that Eren didn't choose this either. He's lost both his parents, his home, had his lifespan cruelly slashed down to just twenty three years old and even after all of that, even after all of that loss he still chooses to fight for the future of others and of his friends. He even chose to spare her, one of his closest friends, from sharing the same fate as him even if it would lessen the weight on his shoulders significantly and make his job far simpler.
What's her burden next to his?
His eyes widened for a moment however they soon shrunk down to normal size and she could see clearly that a genuine smile was forming on his face and he suddenly looked far less solemn and more grateful to her.
"Thank you, Historia."
For some reason the way he said her real name- not Christa Lenz, the mask she wore- made her heart flutter slightly and her face felt warm for some reason. She turned her head away from him to hide the redness that tinted her cheeks.
Several of the veteran Scouts exchanged looks at that little conversation but chose not to ruin the moment by commenting.
Miche cleared his throat." At any rate, even if we manage to successfully capture both Reiner and Bertolt they aren't all we need to worry about."
Historia's moment of fluster immediately ceased at the mention of who the Armoured and Colossal Titans are and she had to hide a wince. Whilst she wasn't especially close to either of them like she was with Ymir or Eren it still hurt to think of them as traitors, that they'd been sleeping under the same roof as them, laughing and crying with them, all whilst they plotted to eradicate the people who clearly weren't devils. It was tragic really.
Erwin agreed with Miche." That is correct, whilst getting more Titan powers on our side would be a big help, we also need to consider many other factors, such as how we plan to defend ourselves once we take care of all the Titans on the island. Marley haven't attacked the Walls with their main military because of the threat posed by the mindless Titans, once we get rid of them we'll need to prepare ourselves to fight humans as well as Titans."
That little chunk of information made Historia a little glad that she's have to stop being a soldier once she became Queen, because if they're enemies really are human and the entire world is against them then that can only mean that they are gonna have to kill other people.
The thought made her toes curl up with nervousness.
Eren followed up Erwin's words with his own advice." Of course there are other things to consider, if Annie is correct then the Warhammer Titan has the ability to control hardened Titan flesh to it's will, the Beast is a blonde man named Zeke and the Cart is a woman named Pieck. Plus there's also the Jaws Titan, which we have no idea how to locate."
Historia had to hold back a frown at his words, he's lying. She can tell by the subtle way he flexed his fingers, how he couldn't meet her eye, he has these little tells that most people wouldn't even notice but being around him as much as she has can make someone learn these things. Why is he lying about knowing who the Jaws is?
Oh she's probably being ridiculous, how would he even know who the Jaws is, and even if he did know he'd share it with them.
"What happened to the Jaws Titan?"
Levi chose to answer her question for her." Apparently there were originally four Shifters that were meant to infiltrate the Walls but Marcel, the holder of the Jaws Titan, was eaten whilst they were about to break the Walls. How funny is that? They lost one before they even got inside the Walls." The short Captain snarked at the end at the incompetence of Marley for sending four children to retrieve the strongest power on the planet.
Historia's eyebrows burrowed." So we likely aren't going to find the Jaws?"
Thr blonde Commander of the group shook his head in response to the question.
Historia accepted the answer with stride and turned her attention back to her green eyed friend with sympathy and worry. She just didn't know what to say to make him feel better.
Eight years. That's nothing, one of her best friends has less than a decade to live, he'll barely be in his twenties when he meets his end, on the outside he looks like he's fine with it, but for some reason she just really wants to hear what he has to say about this whole situation.
So she asked carefully." Are you... really okay with what's going on, Eren?"
In response he looks downcast for a moment and meets her crystal blue eyes with his emerald green one and answers." No, I'm not really, but I still have a role to play here, a job to do, I won't get to grow old but I guess I'll just have be happy with the people I love getting to grow old. So please grow old for me, Historia."
Historia's heart suddenly fluttered and her chest felt tighter for some reason. Pink littered her cheeks but the sweet message behind his words never left her mind as she smiled genuinely, something she rarely does these days.
For some reason the Scouts felt like they were intruding on something private, except Levi who just tched and mumbled something about teenagers, however they continued with the meeting none the less.
Erwin spoke with seriousness about their next course of action." We're planning to capture the Armoured and Colossal Titans, this will be a lot more tricky than capturing Leonhart, given that she chose to join the Survey Corps, however if we manage to separate and sedate them quietly and carefully then it should be a relatively straightforward endeavour, of course we'll need to prepare should that fail but if we can get use the power of both the Attack and Female Titans then beating them should be very feasable."
He then turned to Eren." We're going to need one of our soldiers to inherit the Female Titan, we'll have to extract your spinal fluid for that to happen. Though whilst we're on the subject, what powers does your Titan hold?"
The other Scouts leaned in to hear about what exactly the Attack Titan can do." You said that whoever inherits the Female Titan would inherit some of your Titans traits, should we use your spinal fluid for the job, so what exactly makes your Titan different from the rest?"
Eren paused for a moment before answering calmly." My Titan has the most physical power out of any of the combat Titans but asides from that not much, to be honest the Attack Titan is, more or less, just a regular Titan but muscular. But if the Female got some of my Titan's traits it would probably have more physical power than a regular Female Titan but not much else."
Erwin gazed at Eren for a moment however was satisfied with his answer and backed off." Understandable, we still haven't decided exactly who will inherit Leonharts's Titan but we should still prepare the Titan serum, how long will it take for you to recover should we take your spinal fluid?"
Historia's eyes widened and she immediately asked." Wait. Why do you need to take his spinal fluid?"
In response to the question Eren saw her worried expression and merely answered." In order to inherit a Titan you need to be turned into a mindless Titan and then eat the person who currently has said Titan. To be honest I have the theory that Pure Titans are only meant to exist to pass on the Titan powers, that they just aren't meant to remain that way."
Hearing his answer the blonde's eyes immediately widened and she felt another jab of pity hit her gut for what her friend was suggesting." Wait, so you..."
His eyes shined with sadness as she trailed off and he simply nodded." Yeah, and the same needs to happen to Annie. She needs to die." He spoke in a monotone voice.
Historia... could understand why she's have to meet her end. Annie is simply too dangerous and they stand to gain too much from her death to actually allow her to live, it's logical and perhaps even justified given what she's done and the pain she's caused, she likely doesn't even have that long to live anyway.
Still though this all feels like too much for one day, she's had her worldview completely shattered, found out that her comrades are traitors and learned that one of her closest friends has been carrying the fate of huma- of the walled people's lives solely on his shoulders this entire time in silence without complaint or faltering and has even accepted that his life will be horribly cut short before he's even thirty.
She needs to sit down. No actually she needs to lie down.
Erwin seems to pick up on the solemn mood that seemed to linger over the two and decided that extracting the spinal fluid from their only current Titan Shifter soldier could wait. He waved his arm." Both of you are dismissed, but Levi will collect you at six am sharp tomorrow when we'll be collecting your spinal fluid. Rest up and clear your heads."
Historia is actually surprised by the order but didn't complain at the thought of having a bit of time to fully digest the information which was just dumped on her so she saluted the man along with Eren before they both exited the room and closed the door behind them.
She immediately lets out a breath of fresh air at not being in a room with so many powerful soldiers all at once and her being well... her.
She turned her head around to see that Eren looked to be in a very quiet and thoughtful mood.
She frowned when she saw him in this state but chose not to comment as they began to make their way to their rooms with the moonlight of a summer day illuminating the darkness of night.
It was all quiet until her green eyed friend broke the silence." Historia, thank you for agreeing to become Queen and all, I re-"
"It's no problem."
He shifts his gaze at her words and looks into the blonde girls eyes to see a fire that made a whisper of a smile appear on his face at the proof that she wasn't a little meek girl who hid behind a mask anymore, she was dead and gone with only a fighter remaining.
Not hearing Eren's thoughts Historia continued with her speech." And I mean it, yes being the Queen isn't something that I want but I'm sure that you never wanted your responsibilities either, yet you've been a fighter, someone who's okay with doing what needs to be done."
The fire in her eyes seems to fade, but not completely disappear, as sadness replaced that feeling almost entirely." Then there's the other thing that you have to live with, I don- I don't have to have my lifespan cut short to protect this island, I don't have to stay quiet to everyone around me about the truth of what's going on, I'm not going to be on the frontlines-" a few tears seemed to build up in her crystal blue eyes."- but then again I'm not nearly as strong as you are. You've put everything you have into this battle for nothing in return, with your life on the line against something so terrifying-"
"Historia."
She continued with tears streaking down her face." What's my burden next to yours? All I have to do is sit on a throne and look pretty."
"Historia." His voice was far more shaky than his normally serene speech.
She closed her eyes a little." In the end your the one who really matters in this, I-"
She stopped her speech when she felt a hand on both of her shoulders and looked through her cloudy eyes to see a sight which she never thought she'd see.
Eren Yeager crying.
Historia paused her own tears for a moment." Eren wha-"
"I'm not as strong as you think okay. I can't- I can't do this alone, I won't do this alone, because the truth is that I'm so weak and powerless to stop what's going on Historia."
Her own tears dried up as she was captured by the reliable and dependable Eren Yeager fall to his knees with his hands on her shoulders.
It was just such a weird sight for her, she's never seen him cry, be it by pain or emotion, he's usually the strongest person she can think of, even above Mikasa just because he cares about other people, he takes care of them.
Seeing him fall to his knees like this disturbs her a little.
He continued to vent his frustrations out on mind as she also fell to her knees." I don't know what the hell I'm doing, this power, the things I've done, what I need to do, sometimes it's just too much. The truth is that I try to act strong because I'm weak, I try to act brave because I'm the most scared and confused of us all, I try to inspire others around me because I'm just one hit away from giving up myself. Sometimes I just want to run, to go Titan and just leave everything behind, I don't even know where I'd go, I just want all of this to end for me, so that I don't need to stomach all the lives I'm gonna have to take until my days end in the jaws of a Titan. I am just so done with all of this!" He screams out that last part with venom in his voice and his head hung in shame.
Historia... has no idea how to respond to that.
He's just a human too. All she seems to be able to think listening to him breakdown is that. He's just as pathetic, scared and tired as the rest of them. All she could see in that moment was her friend, he might be a Titan Shifter but he's no less human than she is.
Watching him try to wash his tears away and hide any signs of weakness that he might leave in this world made her heart hurt in ways she wasn't sure she could feel and made her want to make him feel better somehow, to stop the anguish he was feeling.
Historia can only think of one thing to do.
She takes her arms under his, which were currently clinging to her shoulders, and wrapped them around his neck and drew him close with her blonde hair getting mixed in his strands of dark brown and her cheeks burned crimson red at her own actions.
Eren stopped his crying at her actions and pink seemed to dust his cheeks when he realised that a very beautiful girl was hugging him and trying to give him comfort, to lessen his own pain, even if only a little. It was touching really.
He cut off his actions of self pity in favour of returning her action of wrapping his arms around Historia as a showing of gratitude.
For a good while the two don't seem speak or even move, they simply embrace each other under the celestial glow of the moonlight with smiles even appearing on the two's faces.
Historia finally breaks the hug after who knows how long and doesn't know what to say after her actions.
"Why did you do that?" Eren asks with his eyes looking puffy and red from the tears he dropped from his eyes.
Historia's pink tinted cheeks seemed to go crimson at the question and she just said." You looked like you needed a hug."
At teh kind words Eren had a brief look of surprise on his face before his smile returned." Sorry that you had to see that, it can all just be... too much sometimes." He admits to her with shame in his eyes.
Historia allows her flustered state to drop significantly at those words." Your not perfect Eren, nobody expects you not to make mistakes, you've done a lot for us all, so if you ever need anyone to talk to about these things... then you can just come to me."
He smiles sadly at those words." I think I will Historia, thank you." His words seem contain a lot of gratitude for her actions.
For a moment all Historia can do is stare into those intense green eyes. Eren is a lot to her, only him and Ymir seem to really know her in the sense of her simply being able to act like the real her around those two, she can be who she really is, not Christa, the girl who only cares for others, but Historia, the girl who is proud of who she is. He always seemed to hate it when she acted like those around her wanted simply because it would make them happy, and he's always looked out for her in ways that she could only wish for as that lonely farm girl who's only friend was her sister, she can feel a closeness with him that she only feels with Ymir, one that draws her to him, one that-
Her lips meet his before she knows what she's doing.
Seeing her own actions her azure eyes expand in surprise to the same size as Eren's green ones and she instantly pulls away from him and stands up.
What's she doing? She has a girlfriend and so does he! She loves Ymir more than anyone and she knows that he loves Mikasa so-
Her eyes get blocked out by golden hair as and she turns to walk away but Eren immediately snaps out of his daze and reaches his hand out to grab her but by that point she was already running away.
"Historia wait!" She turns a sharp corner but he could still see the tears that were falling from her cheeks.
She can only feel a mix of stupidity, embarrassment and shame at her own actions.
Just what the hell did she do?
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