Two days later, Steve pulled up outside Hawkins National Laboratory.

Eleven and Hopper were already outside, waiting for him. Steve got out to join them, wincing and giving a guilty smile as Eddie and Robin got out behind him. "I know you said not to tell the others, but…"

"You told them." Hopper heaved an impressive sigh, but he didn't look all that surprised. "Come on then. Quietly."

Robin shot Steve an amused glance and then promptly tripped over a discarded trash can in the lobby. It echoed loudly, making them all freeze. As the sound died away, she held up her hands in acknowledgement. "Sorry."

Hopper only shook his head and led the way forward.

Steve had never been in the labs before, and he found the stories from the others didn't exactly capture the eeriness of the place. Despite it so clearly being abandoned, Steve felt he could almost hear the scientists still, the guards shooting, and monsters screeching. He didn't like it.

He also realised he had been here before, a long time ago, even if he couldn't remember it. Eleven slid her hand into his as they stopped outside what looked like a classroom. There were overturned desks and toys scattered around the room, the faded remnant of rainbow wallpaper on the wall.

"The rainbow room," she told him softly. "You never joined us. You were a secret."

"I was?" So the other kids could play together, but he couldn't? Someone that felt like the most unfair thing of all. At least the other kids had each other. Who did Steve have?

"Papa did not want us to know about you."

What had Brenner said in that memory? Unstable? Steve looked around the destroyed room and frowned. Did he do this?

"It was Vecna," Eleven answered his unspoken question. "He killed them all but you… and me. I stopped him. I sent him to the Upside Down."

"It's not your fault, El. Some people are just assholes."

She smiled and let go of his hand to move further into the room. She crouched down and picked up a toy train, her bottom lip trembling for a moment before she dropped it back into the half-empty sand pit. "We are not assholes."

"No, we're not," he agreed.

Hopper joined them and cleared his throat. "Come on. We found Brenner's office. There are some files you should take a look at, Steve."

Swallowing thickly, Steve followed him down another corridor into presumably Brenner's office. Eddie was holding a thick file and, when he saw Steve, grimaced at him. "I think we found your stuff." He held it up to show the Greek symbol for Alpha embossed on the front. "You should read this."

So Steve did, his stomach growing heavier with each page turn. The experiments had been endless, the list of drugs too long to consider.

The things he could do… the power he had. But he hadn't been able to control it, at least not entirely. One of the last pages detailed an accident, the destruction so great a whole wing of the labs had been closed off—a memorandum from Brenner detailing the end of Project Alpha after this. Steve was implanted with the Soteria, his memories wiped and placed with a family in Hawkins.

His parents' names followed in an agreement. Steve recognised his father's signature at the bottom. They always left him behind… because Steve could not leave Hawkins. Thrown away but not allowed to leave, not really. They had been watching him ever since.

"Steve?" Eddie touched his wrist, slowly taking the folder from his shaking hands.

"They never let me go. I'm still an asset to them." He grabbed the following folder from the table, spreading the papers out.

Page upon page of his life laid out in front of him. Pictures, grades, physicals, blood tests. Every single person he'd slept with, musings about possible children. Steve almost threw up at that. He couldn't help imagining what they would do to his children. Thank god he'd always used protection. The last page was dated only three months ago.

Three months.

"I-I was never free. They're still watching me!"

"No, no, they're not." Eddie grabbed him and forced him to turn around. "Steve, they're gone, okay? How could they possibly be watching you now? Vecna got rid of all of them. You're free."

"But- But…"

"But nothing. You are free." Eddie cupped his face, expression imploring as he searched Steve's. "They can't hurt you anymore. Look at this place. It's all gone."

Dead and gone. Steve nodded, holding on to Eddie's wrists tightly, closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he finally felt back in control and opened his eyes again, the room was empty except for them. "Where are the others?"

"Giving us a minute." Eddie smiled, letting him go. He turned and began shoving all the papers back together into their folder. "We should probably keep these, take them home to look through. I know it's shitty, but something could be important here."

"I know." As much as Steve didn't want to, he knew he had to.

He picked up one piece of paper and frowned at the drawing of a large cylindrical tank. Something about it seemed familiar, important. "Eds… do you think this thing still exists?"

Eddie peered over his shoulder, then shrugged. "Eleven might know."

She took the paper and studied it as Robin hurried over to hug Steve. He hugged her back tight, almost lifting her from the ground.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah." He didn't tell her about the government tracking him, about her name in those papers. Those things could wait until later when they could privately freak out together. "I will be. We got my folder. Hopefully, it can help me remember how to use my powers."

"That's great!" She pulled back to smile at him. "Worth the trip?"

"Definitely."

Robin let him go when Eleven joined them, stepping away towards Eddie, and the two began a quiet discussion. Steve knew it was about him, so he tried to focus on Eleven instead, not wanting to overhear.

"It is the Sensory Deprivation Tank. It helps make you stronger."

"Is it here?"

"Yes." Eleven lead the way deeper into the facility. Steve slowed at a fork in the path. He instinctively tried to turn left, but Eleven grabbed his wrist, "This way," and took him to the right.

The tank dominated the large room, towering high as they clustered around the bottom. A small set of metal stairs led to a hatch at the top, presumably where someone could get in, and a row of bathing suits and helmets sat waiting at the bottom. Steve walked over to pick up one of the helmets, turning the cool sphere over in his hands.

Hopper was at the console, pressing buttons, and they all jumped when the lights turned on. With a loud rushing sound, the tank began to fill. Hopper went to turn it off, but Steve stopped him.

"No. Let it fill."

"You can't be serious."

"It worked for El. It might work for me too."

So Steve found himself in one of the bathing suits half an hour later, shivering in the cold room as they waited for the tank to fill.

Robin put a musty blanket around him, shrugging when he sneezed. "Sorry, options were limited." She looked up at the tank and then back to him, eyes full of misgiving. "You sure about this?"

"No. What choice do we have?"

"None."

"Exactly."

He'd almost fallen asleep, sandwiched between Robin and Eddie as they waited for it to fill. He could pretend for a little longer he wasn't about to immerse himself in a water grave. Something about this place made him feel uneasy. How many times had he done this? He didn't want to know the answer.

Finally, it was time. Hopper helped him through the circular hatch and secured the helmet. "We'll stop as soon as you say the word. There's a comm link."

"Okay." Steve hesitated and let go of his hand, floating weightlessly for a moment before he began to sink.

He told himself it was fine as his head was completely submerged, surprised when the water didn't rush in and drown him. Down and down, he went into complete darkness. Nobody spoke to him. The sights and sounds of the world vanished. It was just him in the nothingness.

Sensory deprivation, indeed. Steve hadn't expected to feel so detached from the world around him.

Slowly, he began to relax until it felt like he was floating in nothing. He closed his eyes as if it made a difference and went inside himself, trying to go deep like when he went to the void.

Flashes flickered in his mind—snatches of memory he couldn't quite grasp. Brenner's face floated through it all like a malevolent overseer. Steve didn't understand any of it. There were other people too, unfamiliar to him. It was going by too fast, information slipping through his fingers like water.

Panicked, he opened his eyes to find no difference and began to struggle, limbs weighted down by the water. "Hey, uh, let me out? Please?"

The hatch opened a moment later, and he was pulled out into the freezing air, shivering as blankets were wrapped around him.

Eleven met him at the bottom of the stairs, and as their eyes met, she understood. "It didn't work."

Steve was shaking too much to speak, so he only shook his head. Eddie had to help him get changed, but they didn't talk much, just to get him to raise his arm or pull on a sock. Once he was fully clothed again and the shakes had subsided, Eddie held him by the shoulders and smiled. Steve managed a shaky smile back, tugging him into a tight hug.

"Let's go home, Stevie."

"Yeah."

At least they had his folders and the information on Project Indigo. They would come up with a plan from that. Still, on the way home, Steve couldn't help thinking it had been a waste of a trip. What had they learned, really? Nothing more than he already knew. That he'd been experimented on as a kid, that Brenner was even more of an asshole than he'd thought. That he'd never truly escaped until Vecna destroyed Hawkins.

One thing Steve could thank him for.

He was twitchy by the time he pulled up outside the house. Robin took one look at him, sent Eddie a significant glare and headed upstairs after squeezing Steve's hand. "Night, guys."

Eddie snagged his hand and towed him into the kitchen. "Come on."

"What?" Steve was too tired to do anything but follow, flinching when Eddie turned on the lights. At least they had power tonight. "Eddie, let's go to bed. Actually, I need to shower this stuff off first. My skin is sticky."

"Sit." Eddie forced him into a chair, surprising Steve when he straddled him a moment later. "We're gonna win this, you hear me? I know you're feeling down about your powers, but look what you can already do. You brought me back to life! You can take out demobats with no problems now. You are getting stronger, even if you can't see it. You're gonna beat the shit out of Vecna. I just know it."

Steve laughed, feeling lighter than he had in days. Eddie smiled back, joining in a moment later. "Thank you," he said as their laughter subsided.

"No, thank you. I wouldn't even be here if it weren't for you."

"Don't say that." Steve hated being reminded of how close he had been to losing Eddie. Their relationship, this connection they shared, it had almost never existed. Leaning forward, he pressed his head to Eddie's chest to listen to his steady, strong heartbeat. "You're here, Eds. You're not going anywhere."

"I know I'm not. Don't worry about me, okay? Focus on yourself."

Focus.

Go deeper.

Steve sat up straight, startling Eddie back a bit. "What is it?"

"Where's my file?"

He paced around the table, flipping through page after page until he found the right passage.

'…batch 3B had proven to send Subject Alpha into a state of complete dormancy. Highly susceptible to hypnosis and suggestions in this state…

…induce Subject Alpha with batch 3B and use Sensory Deprivation Tank (SDT). Record results…

…SDT results show Subject Alpha has heightened physic abilities whilst affected by 3B. Has mentioned 'the void' and leaving physical body. Other subjects have mentioned this phenomenon. Possible astral projection? Needs further study…'

Steve sighed and got up. "It didn't work because I wasn't on the drugs."

"Okay… so what can we do about that?" Eddie looked at him, eyes widening after a moment. "No. Steve, you can't be serious? We don't even know what this stuff is!"

"It's not like I haven't done it before!"

"Yeah, like fifteen years ago! We're not giving you expired drugs."

Steve glared at him. Eddie glared back.

After a tense moment, Steve cracked a smile. "Why do you have to be so stubborn?"

Eddie smiled too. "Because I care about you."

Nodding, Steve began shuffling the papers back together. "You're right. It's a stupid idea… but what if it works?"

"And what if you overdose or drown?"

"You'd be there to save me."

Eddie sighed, reaching out to lay a hand over Steve's, stopping his useless shuffling. "If we do this, I want your word. We stop when I say so. If I want you out of that tank, you get the hell out. If the drugs mess you up, I pull the plug, and we go home, no arguments. Deal?"

"Deal."