Author's notes: I was a little disappointed with the response for the last chapter, but that's the nature of fanfiction. Some stories are instant hits while others have to learn from their mistakes and carry on. On that note, I've updated Chapter 1. Hopefully, it's a little better now.
Sorry about the long delay in release, I've been trying something new that takes some time to startup, but should allow a near-weekly release.
Drop in Reality
Chapter 2: And the World Shuddered
Outside of Go Headquarters, pandemonium reigned. The populous depend on their heroes sweeping in to save the day. If ever a villain threatened their city, team Go was there. Even the police had been downsized several times to raise funds to build their hero's magnificent Go tower.
Now that that very hope had turned on them, fear was palpable on the streets. Acts of vandalism grew widespread as what few officers remained scurried to the hardest hit areas.
The soft hiss of a spray can along with the distant sounds of sirens were the only accompaniment to the lone figure speeding across the rooftops. The green blur came to a stop next to a radio tower atop a five-story building, heaving as she leaned against it, scanning behind her.
"Ooooook, that was a little more than expected," She murmured, allowing herself to slump against the steel structure.
"I don't know, thought it would have been kind of fun to show her the other side of the fence. Destroy a few things, maybe rob a bank or two, have some laughs, but god, she's just sadistic," Shego shivered.
"After what she did to Electronique, I almost feel bad about leaving everyone else there. Well, almost."
Shego shook her head lifting a blazing green hand in front of her eyes. "Why did I leave? It was still only Kimmy. I could have taken her, evil or not. We've fought countless times after all." Shego said tightening her fist against the throbbing power waiting to be released.
"Sure you could,"
The power exploded, taking a chunk of the roof with it. Shego's head snapped around to find the princess crouched on the rooftop behind her, a diabolical smile spread wide.
"My coming out party and you leave just as things were getting good, Shego. Or maybe good was being too optimistic. Without you, those idiotic brothers couldn't last long enough to whet my appetite." The smile somehow grew a little manic.
Shego turned along with Kim as the girl circled her. "But, if you try reaaaaaly hard, maybe, just maybe you'll be able to satisfy me." Kim licked her lips with a crazed giggle.
Shego smirked and crooked a finger. "The little princess thinks a lot of herself now that she's had a taste of the wild side. I'm a tad late for an appointment, but seeing as you ran out here for little ole' me, sure, I'll give you a free face rearrangement."
"Ha, ha, ha, ha. Exactly what I wanted to hear," Kim jumped straight in with a sweeping kick.
Adrenalin pumped through Shego's veins. The familiar surge bringing everything into crystal clarity. She jumped over the foot, adding a half twist to her flip. She landed on the opposite side of the building, fists ablaze in green fury.
Her eyes darted over the area, finding no familiar form chasing after her. 'Where…GAA' Shego rolled to the right, a giggle trailing after and finally a crash where she once crouched. She spun to find her opponent, hair hiding her eyes, fist embedded a quarter inch into the roof. The giggle rose in tempo as she stood up slowly, flicking pieces of cement from her knuckles. "Come on Shego, get with the program. You flailing about to avoid everything is how my alter ego fights. Are you telling me you can't manage to muster a little more spunk than that pathetically weak form of mine?"
Shego growled, her fists aglow as she punched brilliant balls of blazing plasma at the redhead.
Kim walked towards Shego with an exaggerated yawn, blasts simply not where she was. Four feet away, a hand snaked out grabbing Shego's outstretched wrist. In a blur, Shego found herself spinning wildly in the air, slamming straight into the radio tower top.
Shego slumped, shaking her head.
"Such a disappointment." The words echoed in her ears even as her watered eyes tried to focus on the three wildly wavering forms in front of her.
'How the hell did she do that!?'
"The world is my stage. Those that dare tread there had best be able to entertain me. Unfortunately, I find your lackluster performance sorely wanting."
Through the haze of her scattered vision and hair hanging over her eyes, she watched the blurs come together just as they jumped straight at her. Shego grunted, and lashed out with her fist, only to catch nothing but air even as she fell from the radio tower landing roughly on the rooftop below.
Kim twisted through the air, a ground pound aimed at Shego's head.
"F your stage," Shego growled side-stepping, allowing the redhead to zip past.
Shego grunted as her head whipped back, hair caught in the hands of her adversary. She crashed into the unforgiving ground, gasping for air.
Her eyes teared as she looked up to find Kim's smiling face hovering above her.
Shego's fingers slashed, an eerie green blast going where Kim's head once was. "That one was just low," Shego grumbled.
"Coming from the woman throwing plasma." Kim laughed, stepping back and forth, dodging each of her flaming balls. This went on for long seconds as Shego's ire grew. Kim wasn't even paying her hands attention, they were locked with her own, that infuriating smirk ever present.
"Come on Shego, I'm giving you every chance, but you keep disappointing me with all these useless dried-up moves over and over again. I want to see something new."
"You want new? I'll show you new!" Shego backflipped, her flamed hands swept along the roofing, gravel turning to slag, hurling the result at Kim's face.
It met thin air as Kim jumped. Shego was right behind her, flaming hands outstretched to deliver the final blow. Time seemed to slow as it did with all their matches. Small details came into focus. The wind waved through Kim's red locks, her green eyes framed by a knowing smirk. She was about to latch onto the girl's leg. She could feel it as her hand came closer to throwing the twit down. And then, suddenly time sped. She found her arm captured, the girl using it to pivot around, straight into Shego's stomach with a knee. With an extra thrust, Shego was flying.
Shego grunted in an uncontrolled tumble, her senses coming back to the present quickly. 'She won that exchange, but I can get her after I swing back from the roof's edge…'
Disbelieving eyes saw the edge of the building mere centimeters away from her outstretched hand.
Shego franticly flipped herself around, head swiveling to find anything to latch onto. She came to the sickening realization that the unforgiving pavement four stories below would be the first thing to greet her.
'This can't be how it ends, not like this, not by her.' Her body plummeted, eyes facing the sun. From out of that bright spot, she saw a flash before an idiot with a blue grin came whizzing by.
With a loud thump, Shego found herself in a cushioned seat, zooming away.
"Shego! I've been looking everywhere for you. I need you for a new project I've been working on."
Said woman didn't respond, looking back at their impromptu battlefield. On the edge, Kim merrily waved.
"God damn bitch, you may have won, but I'll beat you black and blue next time!" Shego screamed into the wind.
Kim simply watched the speeding hover jet go, and her smirk vanished. "Is there no one that can entertain me?" She mumbled. Cocking her head to the side, she turned in the opposite direction. "On that note, I have a date with a mind device," with a final giggle, she was roof-hopping away.
"Ro..." the boy floated in darkness. Its comforting embrace similar to long-forgotten memories of being held by his mother. Nothing could harm him here. He was safe.
"Ro..."
If only that annoying voice would stop. It tugged at his consciousness, so faint and yet persistent.
"Ron..."
There it was again, his eyelids scrunched as he tried to remember why that voice was so important.
"RON!"
The boy jerked, the world wobbling as some force shook him. He found the one, maybe there were three, all wildly weaving about.
Ron squinted and the shadows merged into a single person... with red hair.
"Ah!" Ron jumped back crawling behind several overturned crates.
Kim Possible jerked away in response looking all over the room in a ready stance. Her gaze crossed the unconscious team Go, but there was no movement from any of them. With a small sigh, the girl let her fists drop. "Don't do that Ron, this day has been strange enough as it is without any more scares."
Ron blinked, and then blinked again, peaking over the top of his hideaway.
"Do you know what happened here? I remember them capturing me and then everything became hazy." Kim whispered, her voice going distant as her eyes seemed to try and piece some unseen tapestry together. "Did you rescue me?" Kim asked, her eyes focusing on him.
"Kim?" Ron asked, shuffling into view.
"Who did you expect? Well, whatever you did, it seems to have worked though I think you were a bit rough with them..uff," Kim grunted, Ron grabbed her into the mother of all bear hugs.
"I'm so happy to see you, you turned all evil and whipped ass on all those guys and then you wanted me to turn evil and now you're good again and..."
"Hold on," Kim said, stopping the non-stop explanation. "What are you talking about? I'm just me."
Ron stared into those green eyes, the light blushing at his intense scrutiny going unnoticed. Ron's lips spread in a hesitant smile "I…I guess you're right. I was so worried that the whole world was going to be destroyed," he whispered to himself.
"Seems like a lot happened after I blacked out, how about we take care of team Go and get out of here?" Kim asked, already walking towards a groaning Hego. "Where did that device go?" Kim asked looking around. Not finding anything, she sighed. "Guess we'll have to call global justice to get that sorted."
"Sounds like a plan, KP," Ron said. He had plenty to celebrate, after all, his Kim was back. 'Maybe the effects were only temporary? Or maybe Kim just beat it out.' Ron thought before shrugging, it didn't matter. Kim was back to herself and life was good.
Sore muscles loosened as Kim sank into her bed, her arms wrapped around her little stuffed animal. "This has been one wacky week," Kim whispered to the little marsupial as she raised it aloft. "I had a good time with one of my fiercest rivals, battled team Go with said rival, and then..." Kim frowned, her vision going hazy. "...I'm not sure what happened after that, but when I came to, Ron was unconscious." The distance gaze disappeared into a small fit of giggles. "It's kind of cute the way he's been so worried.
Still, it gets a little tiring," Kim rolled her eyes as she heard a noise below her window. A glance confirmed the little cricks of a ladder placed against the sill.
"Well, kangaroo, I guess we should let our guest in," Kim sighed, flipping herself up in her PJs.
With a light touch, she flipped open the window just as a bushy crop of blond hair crept into view.
Kim watched as the owner awkwardly held onto a small sleeping bag while trying to ascend.
"You need help with that?"
"Ahhh," Kim winced as the boy misstepped and fell to the grass below.
"Ufff. Ah, KP, didn't know you were up." Ron giggled, his hands wiping the grass from his outfit.
"Kind of hard these days, you've only been over every single night since that sitch with team Go." Kim shook her head before waving the boy up. "Come on, at least get out of the cold."
"Sure thing!" Ron redoubled his efforts with twice as much fumbling. He eventually came over the window edge, flopping in on his butt.
"It was all right the first couple of nights, but how often do you plan on sleeping over?" Kim asked, leaning against her bed.
"Uhh, I don't know, I just need to make sure you're really all right."
"Come on Ron, how long have we been doing the hero thing now? You better than anyone knows I can handle myself." Kim rolled her eyes as Ron seemed to find his hands very interesting.
"I know that KP, it's just that last mission..."
"You just got hit on the head, Ron. I didn't turn into some maniac out to destroy the world," Kim shuddered at the thought.
The dim lighting hid the healthy blush forming on the boy's cheeks. Another set of vivid images flashed through his mind regarding the maniac in question.
"It was all just so real," The boy said, twisting his hands uncertainly. He stilled them with a look before returning his attention to her. "Come on, just this one last night. Oh please, please, please," Ron begged on his knees.
Kim sighed, 'I'll never let him know, but that's a close second to my pout.' Aloud, she gestured to the corner of the room recently designated as Ron's. "Fine, but this is the last night. If my parents figure out you're sleeping in here, they're going to be none too happy and you know how Daddy gets when he's upset."
"Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you," Ron said, keeping his voice low as he rolled out his sleeping bag and lay back on it.
Kim shook her head, returning to her bed and turning off the light. The silence of the night relaxed her as visions of her day flashed before her. Her lip curled down at Bonnie's incessant needling as they performed their tower in practice. 'In the future, adding a twist on the dismount would be nice,' she thought slowly giving way to the land of dreams.
"Kim?... Ufff" Ron grunted as a pillow hit him straight in the head.
"I've got an early morning tomorrow. You stay, you sleep." Kim mumbled, her right hand stifling a large yawn.
"Sorry, I was just thinking...?"
"Yes...?" Kim's voice whispered, already drifting off again.
"It's been a while, why don't we hit Beno Nacho tomorrow." Ron finished, whispering to himself.
"A fantastic idea." a gentle voice responded next to his ear.
"Awww!" Ron jerked up, flipped over, and landed roughly on his side. He shook his head, a trickle of giggles coming from somewhere to his left.
The figure moved next to the lamp, a sharp click illuminated the redhead, shadows playing across her face.
"Kim? Don't scare me like that, I…I thought you were asleep."
"Oh, I'm sorry baby, I just woke up after a nice long nap and wanted to say hello."
"Nap?" Ron scratched his head, one eyebrow raised.
"Yup, ever since Go tower..." She took a step forward to reveal a heated gaze staring into his eyes.
"Go tower..." The redhead slowly smirked, revealing a vision that had haunted Ron's dreams ever since that day.
"But… you… dream... uh."
"Oh, no, no, no silly. I'm no dream," Kim said, swaying back and forth in her pajamas, moving up on Ron.
Ron backed up until he came to the inevitable wall someone had left behind him. Even before he realized his dilemma, Kim blocked his escape, two lithe arms on either side locking him in. Her eyes never left his, growing to encapsulate his entire world.
"I've given you a few days to think about it, now it's time to make your choice," Kim whispered, one of her fingers making little circles on his chest.
"Cha… choice?" Ron shivered as he felt a phantom hand constrict around his neck.
"Yup, go evil by your own hands or leave the world in mine," she retreated a few inches, her lips accenting each word
Ron flopped to the floor, his knees giving out. Kim moved further, allowing him to slump.
"No, no, no, this isn't possible. Kim was back, and everything was normal. How did this happen?"
"Now that, is a secret. But we are drifting from the topic. You've had your time. Now, your choice...?" This person that looked like Kim asked accentuating each word. A shiver ran down his spine as she knelt next to him. Her light hands pulled his head up to meet her gaze.
If Ron hadn't been so distraught, he may have caught the look of anticipation or the building excitement in her voice.
Her form was only a blur as tears streamed from his eyes. The seconds stretched, his hands covering them. 'Everything was good! Sure I got teased at school, but Kim always had my back and now….now there is only one choice.' He slammed one fist against the floor in frustration.
"Is that a no, Ronny? If so, you'll love my plans for the school, the town, the country… the world." She shuddered with a giggle.
Ron squeezed his eyes shut, his mind envisioning a barren wasteland. Charred black, bodies lying in hapless piles.
'no. no. NOOOO!'
"Damn it, I'll do it!" Ron stood up to find he was talking in an empty room. "Uh, evil Kim?" Ron asked looking around in bewilderment.
"Yeeeees?" For the second time that night, Ron jumped as Kim leaped in from the window, a small bag over her shoulder.
"You were here then..."
"Sorry about the delay, it took a second to get this out of hiding," Ron's jaw dropped open as she uncovered another item that had featured very prominently in his recent nightmares. Crackles of lightning arched from the helmet's twin antennae.
"But that vanished from Go tower," Ron said pointing at it.
"Hardly, I simply hid it away for this special occasion. But enough of silly boring things. It's time to say hello to Zorpox." With a small umph, Ron found that he now held the device in his hands. Looking up, Kim sat on her bed, a video recorder in one hand. "Don't mind me, please continue."
Ron sighed, hefting the helmet up, a horrible sensation going through his stomach as he felt the weight. A weight that sat heavy in his hands, but far far heavier in his heart. Was this the right choice? Would going evil only make it worse? No, if nothing else, his other half wanted nachos. Couldn't have those in a wasteland. He wouldn't let Kim do as she wanted. They were a fragile conviction with the fate of countless people hanging in the balance. His eyes cringed together before an idea fluttered through his mind. 'A quick turn of the helmet and…' tutting drew his eyes to the girl slowly waving her index finger back and forth.
"No, no naughty boy. Remember what will happen if you try."
Looking down at the helmet again He hefted it, the heat from the shocks mere inches from his face. "Mother, Father... forgive me." His voice squeaked.
There was an explosion of light that blew away the night as Ron shook violently, falling to the ground.
With a flourish, Kim flipped the recorder away, closing it carefully while placing it lightly on the bed. "We finally come to the fun part," She whispered with glee.
Ron slowly rose to his feet, the device rolling across the floor.
"Byhaaa!" Ron's eye's snapped open as he pumped a fist into the air. "I'm back."
"Kimmy Cub what's all that ruckus up there? Is everything all right?" drifted the concerned voice of Mr. Possible through the door.
"Looks like it's time for a venue change," Kim said, gesturing toward the window.
A frown crossed Ron's visage before he nodded, "Indeed, I believe we have much to discuss." Ron flipped through the opening lightly landing and then sprinting away; Kim was in hot pursuit.
They didn't go far before Ron came to a stop, not even breathing hard from the rigorous run.
"Ah, that was a nice stroll through the moonlight, don't you agree?" Kim asked, leaning up against a nearby tree, her hair shadowing one eye.
"I will admit, that was a good piece of work," Ron answered with a nod crossing his arms as he leaned against the tree opposite Kim's.
"What could you be talking about?" Kim asked, flipping her hair back. "I just made it easier for you to come out and play."
"Ha, play indeed. People simply don't give your martial arts enough credit. You put yourself into a hypnotic trance to make it appear you had changed back. Once a trigger was spoken, you returned. You led me to believe everything was a figment of my imagination. Of all the pretenders, I must admit, you are very very evil.
"Why thank you, I thought it was a nice touch." Kim shrugged her shoulders.
"Yes, but you forgot one part," Kim raised an eyebrow.
"You didn't bring me out to conquer the world. With my mind and your power, it would be a snap, no challenge at all. You want something bigger, a real challenge."
The sweet smile melted away from the redhead's lips turning wicked. "I knew you at least wouldn't disappoint me." Ron nodded back bringing both arms up into a stance.
"Wonderful, I've been waiting so long for the main dish," Kim pushed off with her feet, flying towards Ron with her right fist
Ron countered by rolling back, jumping off with his hands to flip into the tree above, continuing with the momentum, he used a branch like a gymnast, launching himself feet first at Kim. She ducked to come up in his guard, but found that the attack was a feint, he had rolled in mid-air to face her, capturing one of her arms and using his momentum to throw her.
She quickly stabilized, tucking herself to control the impromptu flight. With a light tap, she rebounded off of her previous leaning post to rocket back. She landed in a neat roll, coiled to spring only to find that her target was currently down the street running. With a small growl of frustration, Kim was after him.
"Oh Ron, please don't disappoint me this early," Kim called, flipping onto a nearby roof to gain the high ground. Her gaze scanned left to right, not spotting him. She frowned before hearing a garage door open further down the street. Her head whipped around to find a small light turn on. With a quick smirk, she was off again, leaping from one house to the next landing in front of the garage.
"Come out, come out where ever you are," Kim called in a sing-song manner.
"Whatever you say," Kim whipped around as the voice behind her caught her off guard. The black engine oil to the face didn't help, but she was able to turn away from most of it. Instinctively she ducked, the wind whipped past her and she slid in for a low kick. The sound above her indicated he had flipped over it. Kim crouched and pushed off with her hands generating a mammoth mule kick.
Ron jumped off her kick, flying over the rooftop.
With a little extra space, Kim ripped off the lower half of her pajamas, using them to wipe away the majority of oil that still covered her face.
With little effort, she followed Ron's path over the roof, landing in the backyard next door. She spotted him going over the next fence and followed. She was forced to dodge midair as a thin pipe rammed through where she once was. A few handsprings and she was once again facing Ron, his impromptu garden hoe/staff held in front of him.
"Running away and using tricks? I expected better from you. At least other villains fight first before running with their tails between their legs." Kim uttered as she slowly circled.
Ron's sharp gaze never faltered. "True, but then I am not an idiot either. I'm fully aware that you have the advantage in a straight fight. I'm simply evening the playing field with my mind."
Ron flew through bow forms, striking precisely as Kim backflipped away, trying to spot any weakness in the guard. Dodging flipping, and finally, she found a slight overextension. She used her last spring's momentum to catch the staff's head, adding her weight to it.
Ron immediately let go, jumping back. Kim exercised a few katas of her own before throwing it over the fence and onto the road.
"Now it's just you and me." Kim jumped forward, using fast jabs and kicks to keep him on the defensive and remove any possible retreat. He flowed with her movements, allowing a few through with a grunt to angle his hits in. Not nearly as hard as her own, but still raised a grimace.
Kim smirked as she saw another slight falter in his form, going in for a hit, she found that he too was grinning. His guard snapped into place and a kick was on its way to her exposed midriff. She shifted her punch to pivot off his leg, thrusting up and over him. As she came down, she noticed he threw something onto the ground that gushed forth a dark noxious cloud.
With a quick breath, she was engulfed by the cloud, quickly rolling to the side. A few more steps and she left its cover, finding Ron hovering over some tools left carelessly out in the yard, hands nearly a blur as they took and assembled pieces. Kim had no intention of letting him finish.
She was running low, flicking a loose rock at his head along the way. It was only luck that one of the tools intercepted the rock. A wrench flew into the air, landing with a thud in the evening night.
Grunting in frustration, Ron turned the weedwhacker towards her. A sharp punch on the side and the blades flew out at her. Her eyes wide, Kim ducked, the blades shaving a few hairs from her head. When she stood back up, she found that Ron's little achievement cost him as the altered device exploded in his hands.
He shook them to remove the fire.
"Impressive, very impressive indeed. Anything else you plan to show me? Not likely, by the sound of your breathing."
"Not quite, I still have an ace up my sleeve," Ron said, through his labored panting.
"Oh, and what might that be?" Kim asked casually. She was winded as well, just not nearly as badly. Her eyes flicked back and forth finding nothing at hand, high walls blocking easy escape. 'Checkmate.' She thought with a grin.
"Monkey powers," Ron mumbled, a sharp yellow glow encompassing his body. Her eyes widened even as the yellow coalesced around his hands. With deep concentration, he thrust them at her. She jerked back even as they fluctuated wildly. Ron screamed as the aura exploded, rocketing him straight back into the brick fence, and knocking him flat.
"Interesting, I don't believe I've seen that before," Kim replied as she quickly strode up and straddled the boy, making sure he was very well pinned. "I'll admit, you gave me quite the workout and this was far more fun than I've had in years. You're better than even Shego." Kim's eyes went distant as if pondering.
"Now what are you going to do with me?" Ron mumbled through the grass shoved into his face. There wasn't a point in struggling, his last resort had blown up in his face. It burned to admit, but he had lost.
Kim shook her head, bringing her attention to bear on the boy below her. "Your martial arts are good. Good enough to excite, but in combination with what this..." She lightly tapped his head. "…I think you'll be much much more fun in the future."
Ron remained silent as she looked down at him, her smirk growing. "I think I'll give you some time to prepare for our next battle."
"What?" Ron asked, his suspicions rising by the moment.
"Hmmm, about a week head start should do. Prove to me that you're worth my attention. Work that wonderous mind for all its worth. If you can beat regular old miss goody-two-shoes Kimmy, I'll come out so we can play center stage. The world will hear our duet." A few soft giggles escaped her lips. "…glorious."
"Still..." Kim lightly tapped Ron's left side for a moment, eyes focused in concentration. With a wicked smile, her fingers pierced the skin. He only grunted as they slowly tugged, blood spilling around them as an object emerged. Triumphantly, she held a little chip in her hands, examining the blood-covered token. "...we don't want to make things too easy, now do we?"
Ron's hand clasped his side as Kim stepped away. His hands dexterously tore his shirt, wrapping the wound as a bandage. The slow drip quickly tapered off. "I should have known that Wade would have me chipped."
"Wade may have provided the chip, but it was my Mother that placed it. Call it a requirement from both our parents to allow bubbling little Ronny to follow me around on missions." With a small leap, Kim was standing on the fence, her back to the boy clutching his side. "Remember, you have one week. Don't disappoint me, Ronnypoo." and she was away, leaping through the night.
Hate-filled eyes followed her until she disappeared. "You have made a mistake, Kimberly Ann Possible. The next time we meet, there will be no dance, you will be on your knees begging for the final blow. Mee, meehahah, mhahahahaha ech." He grunted, applying pressure to his blood-soaked shirt. "There is much to do." He half jogged, wincing at each step even as he forced himself to go faster.
Far off on a roof, Kim stood in the shadows, watching as the boy trotted off. "And so it begins. Now, what shall I do with a whole week?" A slow smile settled on Kim's face as she walked off. "I do believe I have a few ideas."
Author's end notes:
That ends chapter two. I'd like to thank Omnisentinel for taking the time to look over the chapter. If anyone is interested in becoming a beta for the story, please let me know. I'm interested in improving my stories which can be a little difficult on my own. On that note, I've listed a few questions I have regarding the chapter. The questions are intended to help me gain perspective because honestly rereading the same story over and over again tends to lead to assumptions of what is portrayed versus what is really happening. Feel free to answer a few or all of them. Anything will help.
Questions from the author:
Did you see any grammar or spelling mistakes?
Anything identified I'll check into and get the story updated to correct them. I know from my reading that even a single misspelling can drag me right out of the spell woven by the author and I would like to correct any that may have been missed on mine.
Are any parts not descriptive enough?
Battle scenes can be quite challenging and the Kim Possible series is chock full of them. With any battle, it is important to moderate tempo and description. Not enough of either leads to a dry read or characters flying through the air for no apparent reason.
What are your thoughts on how things are progressing within the story?
This is primarily to check if things make sense and flow smoothly instead of jagged transitions that make reading difficult.
Do any of the characters appear to be out of character?
If so, in what way?
Where do you think the story is headed?
This question can help me understand if the direction I intend is conveyed or being interpreted completely differently. It is also interesting to see what others think.
Thank you,
brindani
