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Chapter 19.
Elliot decided today was the day where he would face Olivia. He knew it would not be an easy conversation but he couldn't keep avoiding her. Elliot was running through various scenarios in his head. Elliot knew that avoiding difficult conversations was not a healthy coping mechanism.
As he approached the front door. His heart rate increased and he kept taking deep breaths to calm himself down. Elliot turned to face the buildings before him and swallowed hard when he could see Olivia's last name scrawled on the call box.
He strolled up to it and brushed his finger against the button. He was gonna give her a buzz, but before he knew it, the door swung open. The sudden opening of the door startled him, causing him to step back and widen his eyes in surprise. He regained his composure, realizing that it must have been a coincidence. As he stepped in after another occupant. The man walked into the building and made his way to the elevator. He felt the weight of anticipation on his shoulders.
Elliot knocked on the door, before shoving his hands into the pockets of his damp jeans.
"Who's here?" Olivia called from inside the apartment. Her voice was muffled. Elliot could barely hear her over the sound of feet running towards the front door. Elliot shifted on his feet as he waited for Olivia to open the door, feeling a sense of anxiety wash over him
"I can't see! I'm too short!" Noah exclaimed with a giggle. Elliot smiled to himself.
A few moments later, the door opened and Elliot was face to face with Olivia. She looked him over for a moment before Noah squeezed his way in front of his mother and smiled at Elliot.
"Hi! Come in!" The little boy exclaimed. Noah told Elliot to take his shoes off, as Olivia slipped away to get Elliot a towel.
"Here," Olivia spoke once she returned. Elliot took the towel from Olivia and wiped his head off before looking down at his clothing.
"I don't think this will help with the wet shirt and jeans," Elliot said with an awkward laugh. Olivia smiled, and shook her head.
Olivia turned to head into her bedroom, but Elliot reached out and grabbed her wrist. His thumb grazed the soft skin under her arm as he did so, making Olivia shiver slightly.
"Liv, I'm not going to stay long. I need to talk with you—alone." Elliot said in a weak voice as Olivia nodded her head at him before turning toward her son.
Benson stared at Stabler who seemed quite serious about wanting to speak with her in private. They would have no privacy from Noah while this conversation took place.
Olivia nodded at Elliot. "Noah, if you want to play with the PlayStation the McCann's gave you for Christmas. Go ahead." She didn't voice her displeasure. As much as she disliked it, he had gotten that toy from his half-brother's adoptive parents.
Olivia and Elliot entered the living room and sat on the couch, creating an awkward silence. Elliot thought about their relationship. He wondered if they were just going to be friends forever? Elliot broke the silence by saying, "I've been thinking a lot about our relationship lately.
Olivia looked up at him and gave him her full attention. He continued "I know we've been friends for a long time, and I appreciate that. I just wonder if there could be more." Olivia listened. He expressed his thoughts about the possibility of a deeper a relationship.
"I wanted us to be more than friends, but then Dani messed everything up."
"Hey Liv, I'm curious...are you looking for something more between us than friendship?"
Olivia breathed heavily before telling Elliot. "I'd like to...my biggest concern is just making sure my baby is born healthy and happy. Lately, this pregnancy has been on my mind constantly." She didn't want to hurt him.
Elliot looked at Olivia and smiled. "Liv, if you want me to be your friend instead of a romantic partner, I can accept that. Your kid comes first and I respect that." he replied warmly. She looked at him and knew he was being honest. As Olivia gazed at his sincere expression, she felt a knot unravel in her chest.
xxx
Sonny entered Olivia's house with his arms full of groceries. "Hey, Liv," he said, trying not to drop the bulging bags of groceries. Olivia offered to take some of the items off his hands. But Sonny shook his head and refused, to let her carry anything too heavy. He wanted to cook for both Olivia and Noah and spoil them in any way he could.
Olivia seemed unhappy. "What's wrong?" Sonny asked, concern written all over his face. Olivia sighed and sat down at the kitchen bar stool. "I've been feeling useless lately," she said, absentmindedly rubbing her stomach.
Sonny pulled up a stool across from her and took her hand. "I know pregnancy can be hard, physically and emotionally," Sonny said reassuringly. Olivia's eyes filled with tears. "I know, but you're growing a human being inside of you," he continued. "That is the most incredible thing in the world. "You are doing something amazing, and that in itself is more than enough."
Olivia smiled through her tears and squeezed Sonny's hand. Sonny continued to remind Olivia of how amazing she was for carrying a human being inside of her.
