The Fic Lab Prompt #27: "If you don't get it off your chest, you'll never be able to breathe"

I've been wrong about everything I thought I knew of the world. I just wish I realized it sooner. As I stand here watching him, the guilt is overwhelming. It all seemed so simple at the beginning.

Hello Mr. Cullen, it's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Isabella - Bella - Swan. I've been assigned as your new executive assistant. I look forward to working with you.

Glad to meet you, too, Bella. Please call me Edward. I have a call in 5 minutes but will go over your duties after that. You can sit and review the handbook at your desk until then.

"Edward, please move away from the window."

"I'm just looking at the stars, Bella. It's a big night. This is the start of everything we've been working towards."

Oh, how I wish that were true. But I've destroyed it all and he'll never forgive me. None of them will.

Edward, what do you know about the Dissidents?

Why would you ask that, Bella? You know The Order forbids any mention of the Dissidents. You should not be asking me about this. It's not safe…for either of us.

"Please, Edward, come away from the window. Let's just sit on the couch and talk."

"I need to see it all, Bella. I need to see our efforts finally put into motion tonight. It'll be glorious. Don't you want to watch it, too?"

No words come as the guilt washes over me, so I just give him a small smile instead. I need to tell him the truth. If I don't get this off my chest, I'll never be able to breathe. But I'm a coward. I need a few minutes more where he still loves me. A few minutes more where he doesn't know of my betrayal.

Yes, Bella, I am involved with the Dissidents. I've lost so many people to The Order that I can't sit by and do nothing. I need to do everything in my power to overthrow them. I believe there can be a better way of life, Bella. For everyone. There has to be.

I want to help you with this, Edward. I know it's dangerous, but I want to help. Please let me be a part of it, too.

"Please come over here and sit down with me, Edward. I need to talk to you."

I see the look of confusion cross Edward's face. At the same time, I see the little light appear on his chest and I'm up in an instant. I can't let this happen. I run to him, putting myself between him and the window as my arms reach around the back of his neck. He moves to put his arms around me just as I hear the glass of the window shatter.

I feel like I'm on fire and Edward's arms are the only thing keeping me upright. Still, the pain of my betrayal is stronger than the pain of the bullet.

Edward quickly picks me up, carries me over to the couch, and gently lays me down. I see the moment he notices the blood seeping from my chest.

"Bella…Bella…how did this happen? Why did this happen? Oh Bella, please stay with me." I can hear the terror in his voice as he's trying to understand what is going on. He takes his phone out of his pocket and I think he starts texting someone but I can't focus on anything except my confession. It can't wait any longer.

"I'm sorry, Edward. I love you…so much." I pant through the pain as I try to explain. "I was wrong. It was all wrong. I didn't realize it until it was too late. I'm so sorry, Edward." I can't stop the tears flowing down my cheeks.

"What are you talking about, Bella? What are you sorry for?" His eyes are filled with worry as he's trying to understand what I'm talking about.

"It's my fault. I was sent here by The Order. They know everything, Edward. I wish I could take it back, but it's done. I'm so, so sorry."

I see the pain and confusion and betrayal alternate across Edward's face.

"We were going to change the world, Bella…overthrow The Order for good. Oh, god, what have you done…what have you done?"

Right before I pass out from the pain, I pray he can find a way to forgive me.