Anakin's organs turned to ice.
"...Anakin Skywalker... or should I say Luke Lars?"
He couldn't have said that.
He… couldn't have.
Except, he had… but… how?!
It didn't matter. Jango was a threat now that had to be eliminated. He couldn't let the man take that information to Sidious. He had to do damage control, which meant—
Someone bumped him as they slid past and into a seat drew his attention and his head shot around, taking in all the beings surrounding him. Jango had chosen his confrontation spot well. Anakin couldn't take care of the "problem" immediately. Too many people would see. Anyone could be recording this… he couldn't lose control now. That would give him away to Sidious just as much (if not more so) than Fett taking in the information.
That didn't stop the darkness from calling to him, offering itself up. All he had to do was take it. His fingers twitched, itching to kill the man in front of him – to eliminate the threat. He had to do something! He—
Ana...! Wh...'s ...ong?!
Siri's voice cut through the panicked static in his mind. Her presence seemed so quiet and felt so far away that he could barely tell what she'd asked, but it still managed to get through to him. He blinked, clamped down on everything with an iron will, he couldn't allow himself to feel anger… or guilt for what he had almost done, not now. Then he took a deep breath, although it did little to quell his inner panic.
Jango Fett! He practically shouted back through the Force. He knows! I have to kill him, Siri! But I can't! I can't kill him! Not in cold blood…
Not like this…
"You really didn't think anyone would figure it out, did you?" Jango asked.
Anakin turned his (far too wide – stupid childish body!) eyes to the man but couldn't make himself say anything. He didn't trust what would come out of his mouth if he opened it.
The man must have noticed something, though, because he put his hands out to either side and slowly sat down, making himself less threatening. Anakin blinked. Boba Fett wouldn't have… well, he probably wouldn't have bothered confronting Anakin at all… so why had Jango? Why was he even here? Was Sidious here too?!
The panic that had been slowly fading flared up again and he threw his senses out. He found… nothing. He couldn't sense anything but Siri and the general distrustfeargreedanticipation that permeated the area. That didn't mean the Sith wasn't there. He could hide himself from Jedi Masters so… No, no Sidious wouldn't be here without an entourage of some sort. Why show up here at all, even? He wouldn't have had to wait for something like this to confront Anakin, he'd only have to wait for his 'initiate' to show up to the Senate. Unless he wanted Anakin quietly taken care of without getting traced back to him…
Jango kept watching Anakin warily.
"You really were a slave, weren't you," he said, not like a question, but it was quiet and soft – almost soothing.
Anakin still stiffened, and he struggled to keep control. He began releasing his emotions to the Force almost desperately, practically shoving them away only for them to grow back worse than before. He clamped down on them even harder and forced himself to focus on the area around him. After a few seconds, he realized that no one else seemed to have any malicious intent directed at him, so he allowed himself to focus on Jango, trusting the Force to inform him if someone did decide to attack. He didn't like it, but he didn't really have any other choice at the moment. He needed all of his mental faculties to focus on Jango.
The bounty hunter still hadn't gone for his blaster, continuing to hold his hands out as if it would make him any less dangerous. Anakin knew the kinds of gadgets he had in his suit… but he wasn't wearing his helmet. Mandalorians – even disgraced Mandalorians – always wore their helmets to attack.
The man kept up the soothing tone as he continue to speak. "I tracked you down here because I need a couple of questions answered." Anakin didn't relax and his eyes narrowed. Who did he think he was fooling? Jango cocked his head to one side and he let the 'non-threatening' mask go a little. "I didn't take this information to anyone. But it will go out in a galactic standard hour if I don't stop it."
Part of Anakin almost melted in relief. If a Fett said he hadn't taken his information in yet, then he hadn't. The other part of Anakin couldn't relax because if that information went out… It was a good thing he'd stayed his hand, near as it had been. The idea of Sidious getting such vital information… He could feel his paranoia growing into something almost living, straining to reach out to the darkness.
He swallowed his fear as best he could. "I'm sorry, what information, sir?"
The man's expression dried out. "That was one of the most ridiculous cover-up attempts I've ever seen."
Anakin shrugged (he hoped it looked more natural than he felt). "I had to try."
Jango snorted.
They sat in silence while the stands continued to fill.
Ana—n? He sensed Siri probing worriedly. I'm o… ...y way.
Good. He wasn't on the brink of snapping and destroying everyone around him (anymore), but he knew it wouldn't take much to send him over the edge. If things went spectacularly badly, this could go plunging into a black hole very fast. And events in his life had tended to go very badly recently.
"So, how is it that you can act and speak like a mature adult?"
What was that about going spectacularly badly? Him knocking on karma's door? The man had to start out with that question? For the third (fourth? Fifth?) time in the last few minutes, he felt his panic crawl up his throat and it was all he could do to keep it from bursting out of him. He couldn't open his mouth (again) so he just stared at the man, face blank.
Fett seemed to mistakenly take that as a cue to continue speaking. "I mean, it could be a Jedi thing, but somehow, I don't think so. You also said you've trained as a Sith, and yet you were taken here to live with the Jedi a little over two years ago – directly from slavery that I can trace back to the beginning of your life – or very nearly. The math isn't adding up, but you weren't lying. I can tell a lie half a parsec away. Comes with the territory and all."
Funny, he didn't remember Obi-wan saying Jango Fett was a lie detector. Or talkative. Boba certainly wasn't. Then again, Jesse could talk the ear off a wampa and no one wanted to get Kix started on a lecture. Ever. But this wasn't one of his men. This was a dangerous, vindictive and very damaged bounty hunter, so Anakin didn't dare interrupt. He knew if he opened his mouth, he'd give something away – or he'd snap and kill this man who couldn't seem to take a hint and shut up, kriff anyone else seeing. He'd just have to kill them too…
And yet, the very idea made him so sick. He didn't want to go back to being that… that thing. That monster.
But did he have a choice at this point?
He'd have to find a way to stop the information from getting to Sidious… That meant he couldn't kill Jango… not right now. That conclusion worried and relieved him at the same time. The dichotomy wasn't helping.
The man kept talking. "I chalked it up to Jedi mambo-jumbo. Or perhaps Sith mambo-jumbo?"
Anakin's fists tightened by his side. He hadn't had such trouble dealing with his ever changing emotions since… well, Dooku.
No, that was very much not something to think about right now.
"I looked into the Sith. There isn't much on them, but the credible sources claim that they weren't just 'evil Jedi' as many opinions seem to state. Personally I don't see a difference—"
"Then you're a fool," Anakin finally heard himself say. Jango couldn't see the difference between a Jedi and a Sith? Anakin had to admit he had difficulties himself, at times, but one thing he saw from 99% of the Jedi were their intentions. Did they always do the right thing? Kriff, no. But they tried. The Sith Anakin had known (and been apart of) didn't even bother doing that. Many actively tried to hurt the people – the galaxy – around them, often for the sake of a power trip or even just kicks and giggles. Sith enjoyed pain. Or, at least, they were encouraged to. Well, Bane's line was. He couldn't be so sure of the ancient Sith that fought the Jedi before the Ruusian Reformation.
Jango, having finally gotten something from his quarry, closed his mouth, studying the boy in front of him intently. "Those aren't the eyes of a child."
For the first time, Anakin tore his gaze away from the other. He'd already given away too much. Just a couple of words, two sentences, and Jango could deduce things he shouldn't. He wished he had something he could focus on besides this conversation. It almost reminded him of talking to… Palpatine. Wait, he had brought his stress ball today as he'd made a point to have it on him at all times. Gratefully, he reached into his pocket, focusing on opening and closing his fist. Jango noticed but didn't say anything, choosing instead to keep talking.
"Not even a slave child," the man went on. "But I've seen those eyes on soldiers. The ones that regret the most."
Anakin squeezed the ball hard. He wished he had his breath mints on him.
"And assassins. Those that managed to get away somehow."
"I am not an assassin," the former Sith practically hissed.
Jango didn't look convinced. "Funny, you have the tells of one."
Anakin felt as if he'd been slapped. Hard. He had the tells of an assassin? But even as Vader… he'd been the enforcer, not the trained killer… except, what was the difference? Assassins simply did their work in the shadows. As Vader, he hadn't bothered with shadows. He'd just… killed. Indiscriminately.
The panic returned, worse than ever.
He could swear he heard the breathing of the suit – his lungs couldn't get enough air! He should use that– no! No, he couldn't use his negative emotions anymore. He couldn't… not…
He needed to calm down.
Luke, think of Luke.
Anakin!
And Siri.
That helped. Calm. Deep breaths, hold, let it out… just like Siri had done for him.
And he had to think.
Right.
He was at the racing circuit… with Siri… and Jango Fett had just found him, outed him and that caused him to panic.
Why, though? Why was he panicking about this? He hated that he had the 'tells' of an assassin… but it made sense. It wasn't like he hadn't known about his actions or the consequences… even if he'd never put it in that particular perspective. Why was he having so many issues now?
Because someone who knew what to look for had pegged him as the killer he was – as the monster he was. This after two years of healing and therapy. Serious therapy. From two therapists and a kriffing droid. And people could still tell… was this all pointless? Would he ever escape the shadow of Darth Vader? Or would it always be evident? No matter what his therapists said.
Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny.
Was he fighting a losing battle?
The panic was subsiding, but seemed to be drowning under a wave of horror and depression instead of simply fading.
He'd suspected, but… they'd almost had him believing he could do it. They almost had him believing...
He—
"Anakin!" Siri's voice caused both him and Jango to turn to the side as the blond came rushing forward, a very unhappy Bleersh behind her, judging by the color of his gelatin-like epidermis. It wasn't completely transparent, fading into something opaque after a couple of inches, but the skin tended to change color with extreme emotions. Not like shapeshifters, but enough to make a noticeable difference.
Siri looked half-way between panicked and determined, but almost as soon as she came into view, she froze and looked between Anakin and Jango for several seconds.
"Oh," she said. Then she turned to Bleersh. "It looks like we'll have to skip out on that last race."
"But I already entered you!" he protested.
Siri shrugged. "Take it out of our winnings for the day. Please go and get them as soon as possible. We have a long discussion ahead of us."
The sapient (Anakin still didn't know his species) looked ready to argue for a moment, but then he must have realized the futility because he sighed, deflating. "Fine. Fine. I'll be back."
As he turned and slithered off, Siri walked towards them and sat down next to Anakin, making a point of not touching him and facing the bounty hunter. She eyed him pointedly.
"And who are you?" Jango asked, voice warning. "His Jedi Master?"
She scoffed, loudly. "Hardly."
"I have no Jedi Master," Anakin said, his voice quiet. He didn't deserve one.
Jango's eyes narrowed. "Who are you, really?"
Anakin almost didn't hear him. He could hear his heartbeat, his blood rushing through his veins, so loud he wondered why no one else seemed to notice.
Beside him, Siri tensed. "What do you mean?"
Jango looked back and forth between the two of them for several seconds as the race started on the screen behind the two Force users. Around them, people began cheering loudly.
The bounty hunter finally shrugged and fixed his gaze on Anakin. "If you were trained as a Sith, then you can't be the child who was taken at the age of nine from Shmi Skywalker to be a Jedi. So who are you really?"
Anakin's world stumbled to a halt and everything seemed to hang in the air for a moment that lasted an eternity. Then he was bringing his hand up, almost before his mind had even registered. He'd gathered the Force, no longer sure which side he'd drawn on, and not entirely caring at this point. He just had to eliminate—
A hand on his arm stopped him.
The world went back to standing still.
Slowly, Anakin forced himself to turn and look at Siri. She was staring at him, concernfearpain flowing off of her. She was biting her lip, her brow furrowed… Then he realized and recognized her pain. That was his fault. He was dragging her down again. Part of him recognized that as unimportant. Part of him recognized that he needed to stop and listen… but he didn't want to. If he didn't act…
"You," she said to Jango, somehow able to sound perfectly normal despite what he could feel in the Force. She stood on the verge of diving right back into their past, but from her tone, no one would know. She continued after a short pause, "Need to stop talking. Now." Her words held no room for argument. Then she turned to Anakin, completely dismissing the bounty hunter, and let go of his arm, very pointedly.
"I'm sorry I touched you like that without your consent, Anakin. May I touch you again?"
It was too much… everything was too much. He wouldn't have this problem as an adult! Even as an adult Sith! He'd realized before how his child's brain couldn't compute like he needed it to. It showed in his words and thoughts and actions and every other aspect of his life. He was an adult trapped in a child's body, and it couldn't handle him. It couldn't handle the thoughts and memories and stress… He'd known before, but he hadn't known, not like he did right at that moment. Like sticking a program into a computer decades old… no wonder he could barely function.
"Anakin, I need you to nod or shake your head."
Oh, right… she'd asked him… touch? Something to ground him. He'd spoken with Master Xio and Girth about such things before. Right…
Slowly, and ever so slightly, he nodded. It felt jerky and surreal. Was he going into shock? Over an outed secret? How weak was he? No wonder children needed protection. If he hadn't had any previous experience…
He felt something on his shoulder, a hand. He focused on the hand.
"Where are we?" she asked.
"Coruscant."
"A little more specific?"
"The illegal racing circuit, third base, Senate district."
"How old are you?"
"Eleven standard years."
"What is your name?"
"Anakin Skywalker."
"List the people who mean the most to you."
He glanced over at Fett. Was that such a good idea? Although, most of the people really important to him weren't even alive at this point in time. Or Fett already knew about them. And he needed to focus on the questions because if he focused on Fett, he'd still likely kill the man and he couldn't and who would even think that?! And—
"Anakin?"
Right. Focus.
"Shmi Skywalker. Padmé. Luke Skywalker. Leia Organa. Ahsoka. Rex. Obi-wan. Siri Tachi. Girth. Tai'k Xio. Coira. Hik'te, Bale, Maelee, Thoran..." As he went on listing the names of the children he'd come to be close to, then the clones he'd trusted his life to, the world began to slowly filter in. He could hear the shouting of the relatively sparse crowd and the thrum of the racers. He could smell the dust and grime and oil and unwashed bodies and old metal that always permeated Coruscant's underground.
Then he realized he had arms around him, tentative and loose, as if the unsure hold could break at any point, but they were there and he was rocking back and forth.
Something his mother would do.
"Okay, now focus on me."
"I'm not a child," he whispered, although he couldn't seem to find it inside himself to pull away from her. It was a lie, plain and simple. He may have the memories of a 45-year-old Sith, but he had the mental and emotional capacity of an eleven-year-old.
"Yes, you are," she replied back, calling his bluff.
He clutched at her, closing his eyes and doing as she instructed, finding her in the Force and focusing on her presence. She helped him release his emotions, and it helped. After a few minutes he took a deep breath and finally found the strength to push away from her.
"Thank you," he said. Then his eyes focused on a very quiet Jango. Suddenly, he was very grateful he hadn't cried.
His thoughts went back to what Jango had just said and he grit his teeth, but forced himself to focus. The last thing he needed to do was allow himself to go down that immature line of thought again.
"So, you went after my mother?"
The bounty hunter didn't answer. He didn't have to. Anakin took another deep breath.
"The Galaxy's existence may very well depend on your answer to my next question so I suggest you answer truthfully. Is she alive?"
A pause and Anakin didn't need the Force to feel the other's suspicion, but he did finally answer.
"Yes."
A weight lifted off of Anakin's chest. Jango wasn't lying. As Vader, he'd gotten better at sensing dishonesty. Jedi (and Sith) weren't lie-detectors, although the best trained of them could be close. Anakin could tell from a combination of body language and the general aura of the person in the Force. Said aura was something that all sapients had, although it was something that could be manipulated by a Force user, hence why Palpatine could hide his lies.
Still, his mother was alive. That felt right. Nothing like the horrible, twisting foreboding from just before the Clone Wars…
It took Anakin a few moments to remember that he'd seen his mother earlier that day, before Mace Windu had accosted him. Even Jango couldn't have gotten from Tatooine to Coruscant in that time, even if he'd attacked her right after they'd hung up. Stang, he wasn't thinking straight again… Had he tapped into the dark side? He paused and took stock of himself and the situation. Yes, he could feel its taint. Barely there, but still leaking into him nonetheless, twisting his thoughts and memories.
He cut that off immediately and felt his head begin to clear.
"Good," he replied, both to his own thoughts and to Jango.
More relative silence as the crowd around them cheered a little louder, then calmed down.
"Are they… treating you?" the man asked slowly. "I suppose I could have mistaken some tells…" he said the last under his breath, only half to them.
Anakin blinked. Was that… concern?
"What?" he asked, still trying to make his child's brain work again.
Jango felt distinctly uncomfortable and frustrated in the Force. "For your PTSD and panic attacks?"
And that suddenly, Anakin Skywalker, former Sith Lord, wanted to melt into the very metal under his feet. Oh, Force…
"Yes," Siri said. She still had a hand on Anakin's shoulder. Part of him felt grateful, and part of him just felt embarrassed. It wasn't a feeling he was used to.
"Well, you're doing something right, then," the bounty hunter said to the blond with a sneer. Anakin wasn't looking at her, but he could feel Siri roll her eyes.
A beat of silence, then Jango spoke again, gesturing to their surroundings. "If he's having so many problems, why is he here, racing? Aren't Jedi supposed to care for their younglings? Protect them?"
Before Siri could answer, Anakin snorted. The sheer hypocrisy of that statement. Jango had willingly let his clones – his vod – be trained for a war they'd fight at the age of ten to twelve years. Maybe he didn't consider them family, but Boba had also learned to fight at a young age himself.
Still, that would bring up far more than he was willing to get into (or could explain) at the moment.
"You misunderstand," he said instead. "Siri wasn't calming me down to protect me, she was calming me down to protect you."
And the unimpressed disdain returned. He had to be at least partially Force sensitive for Anakin to pick up on his feelings that easily.
"So that is what the Jedi teach you? Such arrogance?"
Anakin laughed, a little hysterically. The crowd around them yelled, some in anger some in excitement as one of the racers pulled off a stunt.
"That is not me being a Jedi. That is me trying very hard to not be a Sith…"
Before anyone could say anything else, Bleersh oozed up to them, still looking very unhappy.
"Here you go," he said, holding out some data chips in one blobbish appendage. "Usual arrangement."
"Thank you," Siri said, reaching out. That was when Anakin noticed the blaster held out of sight of Jango. He blinked and looked up at Bleersh's many eyes, trying to comprehend. Why would he go out of his way to help them? It took him a minute to remember that Bleersh was a businessman. He wanted to protect his profits. Anakin still found he appreciated the gesture, especially when the alien's three alternate eyes on the side away from Jango darted down to the blaster and back as if in question.
Siri must have caught it too, because Anakin sensed warmth and gratitude from her as she clasped the gelatinous pseudo-hand.
"Thank you," she said, sincerely. "We'll be able to handle it."
This time he turned his eyes to glare at Jango. "You sure?" he asked.
Siri nodded and glanced at Jango too, annoyance seeping into her aura. "Yes."
Bleersh watched her for several seconds, then turned to Anakin, as if to double check. He nodded as well.
"Fine," Bleersh said, still unhappy. "But if something happens, let me know. If I can help, I will. If not, I can at least save my own hide."
That was… actually a pretty generous offer from an underground racer.
"Will do," Siri promised. "Thank you."
Then she turned to her two companions. "Well, shall we retire to some place more private, gentlemen?"
Anakin could feel Bleersh watching them as they rose and filed out, side by side initially, but then they got to a hallway they'd have to go through single file. Siri didn't trust Jango at her back. Jango didn't trust either one of them.
So he turned to the man. "Do I have your word that we will reach our destination alive and have a civil conversation?"
Jango regarded him with narrowed eyes.
"Yes," he finally said.
Anakin nodded and stepped forward. He heard Siri sigh behind him, but no one objected. He counted that as a win.
xXx
It took them about twenty minutes to find a cheap outdoor cafe where they could order food. Anakin insisted on this, and while he could tell Jango wasn't happy, the bounty hunter went along with it. That… was actually a very good sign and did more to calm Anakin down than anything else Jango had said or done.
Honestly, Anakin had just wanted to get food out of habit. He'd met Dooku over food almost every time they'd spoken, and Jango as well. It was a good, non-suspicious reason to meet in public, and while their discussion would most certainly not be public, none of them trusted the other party enough to go somewhere truly private.
Their mostly silent travel had given Anakin time to calm down, for which he was grateful. At least he'd gotten to a point where he wasn't about to Force-choke the bounty hunter the moment something startled him.
"So," Jango said when they finally got situated.
Anakin held up his hand and reached into his pocket. Then he pulled out a jammer and set it down on the table. He knew Jango had his hand on his blaster out of their sight and would have pulled it on Anakin had he tried to bring a weapon out. However, a jammer was definitely another thing, and perfectly reasonable in this situation.
Jango looked at it for several seconds, inspecting it, then he nodded and finally lifted one of his hands onto the table top. He'd ordered a drink while Anakin and Siri had both gotten full meals. They were fast, cheap and very unhealthy, but they would also fill their stomachs and both needed that right now. It would also give them something else to focus on if the conversation grew too awkward.
"So?" Jango asked again. "Tell me how an eleven-year-old kid has the eyes and tells of an assassin, the PTSD and panic attacks of a war veteran and the confidence of a mature adult without any actual history for any of that."
Anakin stayed silent as he contemplated everything with a calmer mind. It certainly helped.
If he didn't answer Jango satisfactorily, or if they killed him, Palpatine would get the information he'd need to put everything together. So he had to come up with a plausible explanation… and honestly, he couldn't come up with one that didn't come very close to the truth. Caught between colliding asteroids.
He'd simply have to tell him the truth – or something very close to it. This was getting out of hand.
He knew this would come back to haunt him, but it was either that or risk having all of their plans exposed now. The idea of reducing everything to square one – except with Palpatine knowing was enough to make his mind up.
He always had been reckless. Even if Vader had tempered or at least directed that recklessness, he'd never really lost it. If he had, the Emperor in the future would not have died in a reactor shaft.
Anakin sighed inwardly, his mind made up. Then he debated a few seconds longer before deciding to go with the explanation that would make the most sense to a non-Jedi.
"Two years ago, when I was still a… slave on Tatooine…" He paused, frowning. No, he needed to begin earlier. "I have always been different. I could sense things others could not, could learn faster, could build mechanics with an almost innate understanding, always picked out dishonesty, had reflexes far above that of a normal human child… I used to race in the circuit on Tatooine."
Jango, who still hadn't put his helmet back on, narrowed his eyes.
Anakin nodded, unable to stop himself from being a little smug. "I won the Boonta Eve classic. It is how I won my freedom." Twice.
He took a breath, grateful that no one interrupted him.
"About a galactic standard week before the competition that year, I received a vision."
Jango actually scoffed at that and Anakin felt his expression cool. "Jedi can jump several times their own height, dodge blaster bolts, move things with their mind and have empathy that often borders on telepathy. Part of the reason they move so quickly is because they see or know how to move – with the Force, they can predict it. That is how Force Sensitivity works. Now take that to its extreme."
The bounty hunter still didn't believe Anakin, but was far less skeptical.
"Force visions are… tricky, though," the younger time traveler went on.
This time, Siri snorted.
Anakin shot her a commiserating look and she took that as a cue to explain.
"We get visions without context most of the time. Flashes of what could happen but not what does or doesn't lead us there. At least, most often."
"However, there are times," Anakin picked up where she left off, "when we get full-on glimpses into past lives, future events and even happenings on the other side of the galaxy. Although it usually requires special circumstances, it isn't unheard of.
"I am not entirely sure what sparked my vision," there was probably more lie to that than truth, but they didn't have much of a choice, "but in one night, I dreamed of a path my future could take… for the next forty years." Thirty seven, actually, but semantics. "I woke up the next morning with both the knowledge of a Jedi knight and a Sith Lord. Philosophies, histories, tenets, politics both inside and outside each 'order', members, goals – both individually and as a whole. Even though I had never actually been behind the controls of a ship in my life, I could fly one. Once I arrived here, I could navigate the Jedi Temple with no problem. I knew the senate building, levels and paths of Coruscant – a world I had only ever seen in holo-vids." He shook his head, "I knew far more than a nine-year-old slave from Tatooine should, with far too much detail to dismiss it as false."
Jango scoffed and sat back in his chair. "You expect me to believe that?" he asked.
At this age originally, Anakin would have gotten angry, demanded the man believe the truth. Now, he merely clenched his jaw, took a deep but silent breath and released his emotions to the Force. He should have known the bounty hunter would respond like this. When he had first seen Jango, he hated to admit it, but he'd panicked. On their way out of the lower levels of Coruscant, he'd managed to calm down and had eventually entered a sort of cold clarity that bothered him – reminded him far too much of his time as a Sith, at least when he hadn't been a raging inferno of hate and anger.
He didn't like his current mind set… but he also needed it right now. A fight with Jango – physical or otherwise – would not benefit anyone but Sidious. Strong-arming his way through the situation would only make it worse, so he had to find another way. Too bad he'd never been good at any other way.
Forcing himself to move past his annoyance at himself, he tried to think of what Obi-wan – the most persuasive Jedi he'd ever met – would do. Then Anakin realized his former Jedi Master would probably simply accept that he couldn't change the man's mind and move on to try for lesser victories. He'd compromise.
And maybe that's why Anakin had never been good at negotiation; he hated compromising. He always had. It felt too much like allowing someone control over him. Fortunately, he had enough experience in the recent two years of forcing himself to compromise to fall back on, so he simply shrugged and took a bite of his meal.
"Believe what you will," he finally said.
Siri seemed taken aback at his unusually calm demeanor because she turned to blink and then stare at him. He shot her an unimpressed look. She blinked at him a couple more times, then seemed to accept the development as she turned to focus on Jango.
"Do you have a better explanation?" she asked.
Jango sat forward. "I've seen the kind of biological programming people can do with the right equipment and skill set."
The utensil in Anakin's hand paused as it rose towards his mouth. Then he slowly lowered it back to his plate. Did Jango think he'd been cloned? Or grown, with false memories implanted somehow?
"Even saved memories can be programmed into a mind. Someone from long ago whose memories were found either by those doing the programming, or by whoever wanted to bring him back…"
Anakin released his utensil before he broke it. His mind went over everything, making connections. He wasn't liking the picture he got back.
"They seek out a pregnant woman, implant those memories into a child and then the woman manages to get away with that child, only to end up being caught by slavers. The memories help the kid know how to train and then he sees a way to be safe from the people who wanted him to begin with: go away with the Jedi. After all, programmers have fail safes."
As much as he hadn't liked the cool calculation, it was better than a cold fury… but the connotations…
He forced himself to breathe.
"Anakin?" Siri asked, brow furrowed in worry and unease. Right. He would not lose himself again.
He. Would. Not.
Obi-wan would tell him to let it go… but he still had to know… to confirm.
He never had been a good negotiator.
"You knew of the chips," he said softly.
Beside him, Siri gasped softly. She turned to look at Jango, her own shock covering what would likely be fury soon.
Jango didn't answer, although he seemed to be studying the two of them with new interest – and suspicion of course. Then his face blanked and he shrugged nonchalantly.
"Chips?" he asked.
Anakin was about to do something he knew he'd regret later – although he found himself struggling to remember why he would care – when a hand gripped his arm. He looked down at it, almost not comprehending why someone would be stupid enough to touch him right now, then followed the hand up to a very pained, familiar face.
"Not now," Siri whispered, half desperation half frustration. "You promised."
He sensed his rage slipping away enough that he felt he could keep a hold of it now.
He took a deep breath.
Jango snorted. "I see the Jedi are doing a wonderful job of training you – someone who already has so much training."
Anakin's laugh was soft but no less mocking for it. It also held no small amount of incredulity. Was this man trying to get himself killed? Because he seemed to be making a rather good attempt at it.
"I warned you before, but apparently the message requires repetition: That is not me trying to be a Jedi," he said, voice low although he had no doubt Jango heard it. "That is me trying to not be a Sith. You would be wise to learn when and where to stop."
Jango scoffed. "And as I said before, I don't see a difference."
"Then you are still a fool," Anakin shot back. "And a slaver and a cold-blooded murderer. And here I thought even disgraced Mandalorians had some honor."
The bounty-hunter's face darkened significantly. "Maybe it's you who should be careful about what you speak of."
"Really?" Anakin had had about enough of this man's ridiculous attitude. "Do you know what those chips really do? Inside the clones' heads? Because if you even have an inkling then you are not the man I thought you were."
"Are you always this blatant when not hiding behind a mask? Did you really think I would tell you so you can—" Jango started sarcastically but Anakin cut him off.
"They don't suppress aggressive tendencies. Or if they do, it is a secondary function at best. On that chip, you will find a list of over 100 orders. Or, at least that is how many each chip has when the clones are finally old enough to be sent into battle. Those orders consist of everything from committing suicide to murdering everything around them no matter who or what that may be – fellow clones, droids, separatists, civilian children, even the heads of each army, little good it would do."
Jango's eyes had widened in surprise, but Anakin found he couldn't stop now that he'd started.
Kriffing child's brain and puberty-ridden body!
"The orders themselves, however, are not the worst part. How they will be received is. The clone will not be able to refuse the order – will become a puppet trapped in their own body, a slave to the whims of the man you now work for unable to stop their arms from raising or their fingers from pulling the trigger. That is what you have become, Mando'a," he practically spat the word. "Someone who would turn their family – their vod – into true slaves, merely for profit!"
He hadn't thought much about Rex and Cody and Kix and Echo and Fives… Fives. The clone who had died trying to expose the threat of the chips – who had somehow known enough to figure it out. It hurt to think of them. As Vader, he'd drawn from that pain. As Anakin, he couldn't afford to… and now it all came sweeping back.
He half expected Jango to attack him… but the man just seemed to be staring at Anakin in disbelief and horror.
"You're… not lying."
"Of course we're kriffing not lying!" Siri cut in, a hand on her forehead, bracing herself.
The guilt from that made Anakin calm some and he turned his thoughts inward, focusing on breathing and releasing everything to the Force again. Like he had been doing for most of that night, it seemed…
"They told me… nothing like that," Jango insisted. "They said those chips would have some orders on it in case a message needed to be passed quickly, bypassing questions. They never…" he paused, and then closed his eyes as if putting it all together.
The fact that he hadn't known as much as Anakin had assumed went a long way towards soothing him.
After several seconds of tense silence, Jango turned to the Jedi with a troubled but still suspicious gaze. "I still don't believe you, but I need to do some digging."
He stood, grabbed the box of to-go food he hadn't even opened and turned to leave, never allowing them to fully see his back.
"Do not send the information to anyone," Anakin said before he'd completely left the hearing (and jamming) range. "I will find you if you do and you will truly understand the difference between a Sith and a Jedi."
Jango just scoffed and walked away.
The two Jedi continued to sit in silence for several minutes afterwards, Siri looking at him in exasperated disapproval while he continued to cool down.
"Well," Siri finally said with a tired sigh, "that could have gone better."
Anakin snorted mirthlessly and slumped against his chair. "I'm sorry," he said.
She waved her hand halfheartedly at him. Either she'd forgiven him already, or she was too tired to talk about it at the moment. Or both.
He shook his head. "I thought I'd be over this by now," he whispered. "Over the darkness and the anger." Siri glanced over at him, but didn't interrupt. "But it is still there – always there, just waiting for me to make another mistake. It had been getting better, but now… I seem to be having far more problems than I did a year ago." He slumped further as he looked up at Siri, his eyes half-lidded with exhaustion. "Why?"
She looked at him for several seconds before she seemed to realize she didn't know the answer and should probably not attempt to answer it.
"I think that's something you need to ask Girth or Master Xio," she finally said.
Anakin frowned in disappointment, although Siri very obviously tried not to let it get to her – but he did nod in acquiescence.
"Come on," Siri said, standing up and grabbing her own box of food. "We're late and we still need to deposit our funds tonight before we get back to the Temple."
The younger time-traveler nodded and stood, taking his own food and the jammer. He looked around as they left the rather empty plaza. Coruscant never slept, and it wasn't difficult to find restaurants open day and night. However, they'd only been able to see a couple of other people in this particular area – a large reason as to why they'd chosen that spot for their impromptu conversation.
"Should we just call for a transport back to the temple?" he asked tiredly. It had been a long night and he really wanted to go to bed. Hopefully he wouldn't have any dreams.
Siri thought about that for a moment before finally shrugging and nodding. "Probably not a bad idea. We can just have them make a couple of stops on the way."
In that moment, he felt a surge of gratitude that he had Siri with him. That he had anyone with him at all had been a saving grace, but she… she had really become his support. She'd either stopped him from falling or pulled him back from a fall at least thrice now. He was grateful Obi-wan had asked her to come as well. It could have been someone worse – like Mace Windu. That would… probably not have been very conducive to helping him save the world as they would have likely driven each other to the dark side. (In Anakin's case, again.)
Half an hour later, Anakin and Siri were let through the front door of the Temple. It wasn't terribly unusual for Jedi to come back at ridiculous hours. The guards assumed they were master and apprentice and let them through. Both of them were too tired to argue or correct.
They made their ways through the Jedi Temple, parted at the proper junction, each heading off to their own room. Not twenty minutes later, they were both asleep.
xXx
Thank you again to Carradee, Quathis and Khalthar for help with this chapter. Extra long, so I hope you all enjoy it! Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
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