As the students rushed out of the classroom, laughing at the hilarity of the lesson to their next classes, five of them were deep in thought.

Harry Potter wondered why the teacher was so very unconventional. She'd given them all nicknames in the very first class. She seemed to know all about them already. And, there was something odd about her. Harry couldn't put a finger on what exactly it was, but there was something odd about her. It felt like she was hiding a secret.

Ronald Weasley, walking next to Harry, was also wondering about the teacher. She was fun, but there was something suspicious about her, as if this was all part of a larger plan. She was a good teacher though. Quite friendly, and very different from most of the teachers they'd ever had.

Hermione Granger was internally debating. This teacher was fun. She did make very good points. But her approach was highly practical, and there was very little theory. Hermione hoped that they would learn new spells along with the tactics that the teacher was teaching them. This was a new side of dueling. Humor distractions. Still, it was interesting. She wondered if she should approach Professor McGonagall about her 'roasting' skills - it could help with the homework.

Neville Longbottom was outright confused. This woman reminded him horribly of Bellatrix Lestrange. He hated her for being a reminder of what had happened to his parents, but the teacher was actually being nice to him. He liked her for that. In a way, this professor reminded him of Remus Lupin. But crazier. Crazier…hang on. Wasn't Bellatrix Lestrange supposed to be crazy mad? He had no idea what to think of her.

Draco Malfoy was really quiet. He looked around and saw that many of the Gryffindors were all thinking too, just like he was. He wondered if he should talk to them, because he was sure that more than the others, this was freaking him out the most. The similarities between Professor Bella White and his aunt were positively scary. They had the same name (almost, well, he'd heard his mother calling his aunt Bellatrix 'Bella' sometimes), they looked the same (except this one wore her hair in a ponytail), they were both crazy, they both knew lots about Voldemort, and they both called him Drakeykins, they both had high voices, and most importantly they both acted incredibly eccentric. He was going mad. He knew it, he was going crazy! That was it. He'd had it. He didn't care that it was Pottah, or Weaselbee, or Granger, or Longbottom. They knew something too, and he'd do anything to stop himself from going insane. He sped up and caught up with them.
"Pottah! Hey, Pottah!" he said, significantly less loud than usual.

"What is it, Malfoy?" he said tiredly, but kept walking.

Draco flushed. "It's not that. I - er - I don't really know how to say this."

"Well, don't, then," said Ron.

"Goodbye, Drakeykins," said Hermione.

"No! Wait! I need your help!"

The four of them froze.

"Is this about the homework? You know you're perfectly capable of coming up with your own insults," said Hermione.

"No, it isn't that. Don't you think there's something odd about Professor - er - Bella?" he asked.

"As a matter of fact, I do," said Hermione slowly.

"Tell you what," said Harry. "Meet us on the seventh floor near the tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy at seven o'clock today."

"What does that have to do with anything?" said Draco, narrowing his eyes.

"You'll see," said Neville.

And they all parted ways.

Ginny and Luna had Defense together next. The lesson was almost exactly the same, and Ginny was nicknamed 'Firehead' while Luna was called 'Wise Girl' (A/N: Hi PJO fans!). Bella really seemed to like Luna. And Luna really seemed to like Bellatrix. But Ginny and Luna too, however, seemed to realize that there was something wrong with her. Not wrong…just different. Very different.

Monkey No. 1 and Monkey No. 2 were of a similar opinion. The new teacher had actually laughed at every single trick they'd played, not taken any points at all, not yelled at them, not given them detention and not even threatened them in any way. In fact, she'd given them points. Twenty each! That had been the final straw. They'd basically given up. There was no way this teacher was for real. She'd complimented them on their skills of causing diversions and pulled even more laughs from the whole class than their own tricks had caused because of the looks on their faces. Gred and Forge were supremely confused.

The Gryffindors and Luna all met at dinner, and the others decided to join Harry, Hermione, Ron, Neville and Draco at the Room of Requirement.

At exactly seven p.m, the nine students all showed up at the blank wall that led to the Room of Requirement.

"Potter, is this some kind of joke?"

"No, Malfoy. Trust me, Dumbledore's talked about it, too, along with…er…Dobby," said Harry firmly.

"Dobby?" said Malfoy. "Our old house-elf?"

"Yes. And may I remind you, Malfoy, you treated him ABSOLUTELY-" started Hermione heatedly.

"Er…Hermione, I don't think this is the right time…" said Neville, cowering under her gaze.

Hermione seemed to come to her senses, though, and went red. "Sorry. But MALFOY, we WILL be having this discussion later." Her eyes flashed dangerously.

"Alright, stand back everyone," said Harry, pacing up and down the corridor in front of the wall.

"Er…mate?" said Ron.

"Don't worry, he's just as sane as I am," said Luna dreamily. "That's how you open the room."

"You know about it already?" asked Fred.

"Oh, yes. It's got a really interesting personality. I think something inside it is infested with Nargles."

Draco stared at her. What on EARTH was a Nargle?

Potter hadn't been saying anything. Deep in concentration, he walked past the room for the third time. And a small hole opened up in the wall.

"Harry!" said Ginny. "Look!"

Harry bent down near the hole. "It looks like a chute for a slide, like in a Muggle playground."

Hermione grinned. "Then what are you waiting for?" She jumped into the hole and disappeared. The other eight could hear a distant "Whooooooooooooooooaaaaaa!" Harry shrugged and jumped in behind her. The Weasleys and Neville followed, so that it was just Draco and Luna left.

"See you there," said Luna. "Aren't you coming?"

"Yes, I'll go after you," said Draco. What had possessed the Boy Who Lived to create a muggle slide. So he threw away his suspicions and followed the Lovegood girl down the slide.

His first impression was that it was very steep. His second impression was that this slide was Gryffindor through and through. Red with gold trimmings and structured in the most possible daring way. The third thing was that it seemed to be going…upwards? WHAT had Potter done?

All thoughts were pushed out of his mind as he saw light at the end of the tunnel and a lot of color. And he fell into a…BALL PIT? Of all things. A ball pit? He lay there confusedly for a second, then regained his composure. He was a Malfoy. He needed to keep up his reputation. All the others were waiting for him. Potter and Granger just had even messier hair. All the Weasleys looked just as they usually did. Lovegood wasn't even looking at him. She was playing with her odd radish earrings. Longbottom, though, looked pretty much like he thought he did himself. His shirt was untucked, his tie was crooked and he looked very disheveled. He stood up and brushed himself off. He could tell that they all, especially Ronald Weasley looked as if they were trying to stifle laughter. He scowled. "Well, Potter?"

"I swear, Malfoy, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to create a slide and a ball pit," said Harry anxiously. "I just thought no one would follow us down here." He winced.

"It's all right," grumbled Malfoy. "So, we've got a problem to discuss."

"Right," said Hermione. "Why don't we all sit down?" She gestured to a bunch of pillows in a circle or a rug against the wall. They were precisely nine pillows.

"On the floor?" said Malfoy skeptically. The others just looked at him. "Oh, all right."

They settled on the floor. Hermione pulled out a notebook and a pen.

"We're allowed to use those?" said Harry, surprised.

"Not for assignments," said Hermione. "But honestly, they're so much easier to use."

"Right," said Ron. "So will all of you give us your inputs about Profe - er -Bella? Let's go in a circle. Luna, why don't you start?"

"I think she's quite nice. Unlike many teachers, she had absolutely NO nargles in her head at all. In fact, when we were talking a bit about magical creatures, she said she thought the Crumple-Horned Snorcack existed, too, and she's been looking for it, like me and Daddy." said Luna seriously.

Hermione frowned slightly and jotted down, 'Eccentric'.

Next were Fred and George. "You guys won't believe this.." started Fred.

"But she laughed at every one of our ten pranks.." continued George.

"And didn't take any points.."

"Or put us in detention.."

"And made the entire class laugh at our expense," finished Fred.

'Good sense of humor,' wrote Hermione.

Then Harry, Ron, Ginny and herself all contributed points about how she supported everyone in the class, was very creative with defensive techniques, seemed to be hiding something with every word she spoke and had very unorthodox teaching techniques.

The biggest shockers came from Neville and Draco. They both looked at each other.

"Longbottom, I'm not sure if you've noticed, but I assume you must have seen multiple pictures of her," said Draco.

"Pictures of who?" asked Hermione, narrowing her eyes.

Neville sighed. "Bellatrix Lestrange. So you noticed it too!"

"Yes, exactly!" said Draco. "But she seems too…"

"Nice?" interjected Neville. "Yeah, I thought so too! I thought she was supposed to be mad! Well, Professor - er - Bella is quite odd, isn't she?"

"And it isn't just that," said Draco. "Promise me that you won't tell anyone."

"Alright," said Harry. He thought he knew what this was about.

"Okay. So," said Draco, flustered.

"What is it?" said Ginny.

"Bellatrix Lestrange…is my aunt."

"WHAT?" said the Weasleys and Hermione. Luna hummed an odd tune that sounded like 'Weasley is our King'. Harry and Neville both sighed.

"I know," said Harry. "Si - er - someone told me."

"Potter, did you think I wouldn't know about my own uncle? I'm Slytherin enough to put it together, even if Father and the D- my Mum haven't figured it out yet." said Draco. Everyone apart from Neville and Luna visibly relaxed. Neville frowned, and Luna cocked her head.

"Alright, Neville, Luna, there's something I've got to tell you. Sirius Black is my godfather, and he's innocent," said Harry.

"I always knew he was. He's really Stubby Boardman, isn't he?" said Luna brightly.

"No. I mean, he does sing sometimes. But he's definitely Sirius Black," said Harry, suppressing a grin. Nearly everyone snorted. Neville just stared.

"Okay, back to the topic," said George. "This silence is awkward.

"What makes you think it's Bellatrix Lestrange?" asked Hermione.

"Well, first, she looks almost exactly like her, except the fact that Bella does her hair in a ponytail," said Neville.

"And Mum calls her Bella, too. And…" Draco's face burned again.

"What?" said Ron.

"She's the only one who calls me Drakeykins." whispered Draco.

They all burst into laughter. "Come on. It isn't funny!"

"Yes, it is…Drakeykins," said Fred, snorting. Draco huffed.

"But this has to be too much of a coincidence!" said Hermione. "It explains why she'd be trying to hide something."

"And the other facts about her are true as well. The Blacks are a pretty strict family, she was a Slytherin, we all live in Wiltshire, she has two sisters, and she's so ANNOYING. To me," said Draco.

"We've got to figure out something," said Ginny.

"I feel like Dumbledore knows," said Luna quietly.

"WHAT?" said everyone else.

"Hey, anyone would be better than Umbridge, right?" said Luna. They blinked.

"But what if Voldemort attacks the school?" said Neville thoughtfully. "Who will she support? If she fights against Voldemort - well, she wouldn't - she's too loyal to him. But if she doesn't-"

"It would blow her cover," nodded Ginny.

"Unless she's got some kind of plan and she doesn't care," said Ron, darkly.

There was a long silence.

"Let's observe more of her classes. It might help," said Hermione.

"Okay," said George. "Well, let's meet again, same time next week."

"Bye Harry!"

"Bye Luna!"

"See you, Neville,"

"Goodbye..Malfoy?"

"Draco."

"Oh, so are we on a first name basis now?"

"Only around this lot!"

"Call me Harry then."

"Okay, see you everybody!"

And the Hogwarts students departed to their respective common rooms though a staircase that had appeared with doors that opened into each of the common rooms.