Author Notes - This is a much better chapter title than whatever it was before.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN - SURELY YOU JOUST

*SLAP*

Luigi stopped screaming immediately.

'GET IT TOGETHER, LUIGI! If you give up now, we're both going to die!'

Everything else came to a standstill. He rubbed his cheek, barely even flinching when the pain intensified. She just slapped him. Hard. Maybe he knew that she had a good reason for it. That she would never hit him unless she had a damn good reason to. But it still hurt.

'Don't look at me like that!' She yelled. 'I can't do jack squat. Use Gooigi to get the gate open before we're turned into paste!'

The slap did one good thing though: it snapped Luigi back to reality.

*THUD*

The walls jerked forward once more. Some of their spikes sparkled under the flashlight. Polterpup yanked the rope with his mouth, and dragged his paws across the dirt as he tried to pull it. The rusted mechanics inside the walls needed more force. Luigi stepped up to the gate and deployed Gooigi. Squeezing his gelatine body through the bars, he already felt relief wash over him.

'Open the gate! NOW!'

*THUD*

'HURRY!'

With half his time already gone, Gooigi ran over to the rope and got it into his Poltergust. He stepped back, taking great care not to break his fragile gooey body. Daisy pulled on the bars, her rage allowing her to bend them. But they stopped bending before she could fit her body through them.

'Come on...' She said through gritted teeth. 'COME ON!'

The Goob from before materialised behind Gooigi, holding another bucket of water. He took far too much delight in what he was about to do.

'GET AWAY FROM HIM!' Daisy shouted.

He just stuck his tongue out at her. 'And what are you gonna do about it? Oh, that's right. Nothing!'

Daisy shouted incoherent angrish as she shook the bars. 'I'll show you nothing!'

*THUD*

Luigi hadn't noticed the Goob floating above him, ready to dissolve him into a green puddle once again.

'ARF ARF!'

Polterpup leapt from the floor and headbutted the bucket out of his hands. It spilled onto the floor, harmlessly flowing away from its intended target.

'Bad dog!' The Goob yelled, pointing right in his face. 'Bad dog! I got orders by our so-called king to help him, and you're getting in the way of-!'

*CHOMP*

'OW!'

Polterpup clamped his jaws down hard on the blue ghost's hand. The Goob held his hand close, clearly trying not to cry. The fear in his empty eyes only increased when he got a good look at Polterpup's stare, taken straight from his owner himself.

'Okay, okay!' The Goob cried. 'I get it!'

He retreated through the floor as fast as he could. The ghost pup puffed out through his nose, as if saying 'serves you right'. Daisy looked up, and saw the gate move down by an inch or two. She smiled the widest she had since they went inside this deadly castle.

'You're doing it Luigi! Keep going!'

*THUD*

She jumped. The walls were that close already? Her breathing turned heavy and fast, in an attempt to stop herself from crying. She could hear the clanking sound that preceded the walls moving forward. The gate had only moved down a few inches, and still had plenty to go. In desperation, she held her arms straight out to the side, her eyes shut tight. The walls slammed into her hands...

And stopped.

She opened her eyes, and saw the walls being kept perfectly in place. Sweat poured down her face, and she struggled to put on a grin.

'E. Gadd... when we meet again... remind me... to thank you.'

Gooigi pulled the rope as far as it would go, until it went straight. The gate had sunk back into the floor completely.

'Ya did it... Luigi! Now let's... get outta here...!'

Luigi transferred back into his regular body, silently thanked Gooigi for keeping hold of the rope, and rushed out the open gate. After a few seconds of letting the situation sink in, he shot his fists into the air triumphantly.

'Yeah! We did it! Daisy, we-' He gasped. 'Daisy!'

All that happiness disappeared into proverbial flames when he saw his princess strained between the walls.

'Don't... panic... sweetie!' Daisy insisted. 'I... got this!'

She took one step forward, making sure to keep her hands against the walls. Thank Grambi the spikes were fairly far apart. Her hands left a slight yet noticeable dent in the stone. She looked so confident, despite the sweat pouring down from her face. Just one look at Luigi was enough to give her confidence. Giving her quick prayers to Grambi, she leapt out.

'Waaaah!'

*THUD*

And landed on her hands and knees as the walls smashed together behind her. Luigi nearly fainted. She looked at the death trap behind her, and grinned.

'Thought you could take me out that easily?' She said. 'That's the funniest joke I've heard all night!'

She stood up, and Luigi jumped into an embrace. He hugged her so tight that it began to hurt, but she said nothing.

'We made it, Daisy!' He cried. 'Y-You made it!'

She gave him a soft pat on the back. 'What? You expected anything less?'

'I thought I was going to lose you!'

'Don't worry. I wouldn't make you go through something like that.'

Luigi continued to cuddle her like she was a teddy bear, and Polterpup jumped in too, standing on his hindlegs and refusing to leave until he got his own cuddles.

'Okay Polterpup,' Daisy said, in resignation. 'You get yours too.'

The little puppy joined the group hug, and it was the most relief Luigi had felt all night.

'I'm tellin' ya now, Luigi.' Daisy said, slowly separating herself from the hugs. 'If we could survive that, we can survive anything this hotel throws at-'

She cringed, noticing the red hand mark on Luigi's cheek. The sight of it alone made guilt swell within her, and she took a step back.

'Ooh...' She murmured. 'I am so sorry for slapping you. I just... I just...'

Despite the pain it had caused him, Luigi smiled. 'It's okay. Yeah, it hurt, but-'

'Gonna have to stop you right there, sweetie. There is no 'but' after 'yeah it hurt'. I should never do something like that. I… I can't believe I did!'

Luigi approached her and took her hand. 'N-No. Really! I understand. I know you would never do that to me. We were just frightened. And, well, I kinda needed it.'

She sighed in relief. 'Okay, good. But I don't wanna hear you defending me if this happens again. Understood?'

He nodded. 'Yeah. I get it.'


'I doubt that anyone's gotten past that room, but what the heck? I really like recording these. Ahem... you have successfully gotten past the horrid dungeon and its sandwiching walls! Very few people continue to this point of the tour. You are so close!'

'If I have to hear that condescending pre-recorded voice one more time… I will throw a brick at the speaker.'

'Uh… noted.'

The door led to a rather abrupt change in scenery. Compared to the tight yet empty feel of the dungeon, this room was wide and open. Our heroes stood on a stone platform that connected to another by a wooden bridge. Luigi couldn't take his eyes off the giant bronze sculpture of MacFrights's face in the wall. Its 'eyes' stared directly at him, refusing to focus on anything else no matter how much he moved.

Why a bridge? Simple. The entire lower half of the room was a large pit, filled with spikes and spears. A treasure chest lay among the sharp weapons, but neither mortal cared to loot it. Daisy stayed a couple feet away from the platform's edge - there were no walls or guardrails of any kind.

Luigi gulped. 'H-How many bodies?'

'None.' She answered. 'Absolutely none.'

'... What? How?'

Despite all the spears and spikes, not a single body or even drop of blood could be seen. Not even Polterpup, who was waltzing through the spike field without a scratch, could pick up any decaying scents.

'If I had to guess,' Daisy said. 'We've either reached the easiest room of this tour, or...' She paused. 'No one else has ever made it this far. We should be proud.'

Pride was not the emotion Luigi felt. Agonising fear seemed more appropriate. Daisy backed away from the edge, and looked at the bridge instead. It looked far more realistic than the plastic one for the 'moat', but didn't seem the most stable in the world.

'Well, nowhere to go but forward.' She said.

She took a single step forward onto the wooden bridge, testing to see how much it bent underneath her foot.

'Polterpup?'

The spectral mutt looked up at the mention of his name.

'Cover for me.' The princess said. 'This might be risky.'

'B-Be careful!' Luigi said, standing right behind her.

'I don't plan on being anything else at the moment.'

The lack of guard rails on this creaky bridge only served to make all three parties infinitely more nervous. Daisy took a few more steps, and her heart stopped when the boards below her moved down.

They only moved down an inch, but turned out to be a pressure plate.

'Huh? ... WHOA!'

'AHHH!'

A pressure plate that activated three giant swinging axes no less. The implements of death swung in front of them, in such a way that they missed the bridge by only an inch. They passed over the creaky wood one at a time, one second after the other.

'How badly do they want to kill people?!' Luigi cried.

Daisy watched the swinging weapons intently, nothing but her eyes moving. Noting how the axes swayed, she saw how much time they had before getting sliced.

She chuckled. 'Wow. They really didn't expect anyone to make it this far.'

Waiting just a couple more seconds to be sure, she dashed across the bridge without a sweat, much to the strain of Luigi's heart. She reached the other stone platform without the axes even getting close.

It was quite the miracle that Luigi didn't faint.

'Why...?' He stammered. 'Why did you...?!'

'I wasn't even running at full speed. Just sprint and go!'

Polterpup popped out of the floor behind her, barking and panting. He bowed down, inviting his owner to play. Luigi, with a gulp, stepped forward. His foot sank slightly in the rotting wood, assaulting his ears with an intimidating creak.

'Come on, Luigi!' Daisy yelled. 'Do it for Mario!'

Luigi gulped again, and narrowed his eyes. 'Yes… for Mario. For Mario!'

And then he charged across the bridge as fast as his legs could carry him, dodging the swinging axes by total accident. It didn't take him long at all to make it across.

'That's it Luigi! You're doing-'

He didn't stop at crossing the bridge. Instead, he ran past Daisy, up a small flight of stone stairs, and-

*CRASH*

'Ow...'

-directly into the wooden door at the top, smacking his face into it. He fell backwards onto his Poltergust, struggling to get to his feet and blushing profusely once he made it.

'Uh, I-I made it.' He said, grinning nervously.

Daisy chuckled. 'Oh, Sweetie. Why are you always reminding me why I love you so much?'

Daisy opened the door, and into the next (and hopefully final) room. It returned to the more usual design of a big stony box, with at least five banners of the 'king' himself hanging on the walls. A rail connected the left wall to the right wall, and a minecart filled with tomatoes rested on it by the right wall.

The door opened to a small set of stairs to the right that led up to the rest of the room. With no one else to go, the trio made their way up.

'Uh, how more rooms do I have to record for? ... The minecart one. Right. If you have managed to make it to this room, then you are spectacular! Very soon you will-'

'Oh, just shut up!'

*SMASH*

And the speaker was completely demolished. What little remained of it on the wall emitted sparks. A hole in the stonework stood at Daisy's feet.

She sighed. 'Sorry. I really had to do that.'

Luigi stepped back a bit. 'I... I thought you were joking.'

Polterpup, not even thinking about the Phantasma-Gloves, stepped back too.

Daisy spotted the next door on the opposite wall, all the way on the left and completely unguarded. Now that was the epitome of 'too easy'. Her eyes glanced around the room, searching for an obvious trap. They landed on three 'figures' - in reality, just armour stands wearing purple cloaks - armed with crossbows. Normally she'd write them off as harmless stands but, after those sentient suits of armour, she wasn't going to take any chances. She took one step forward. The figures fired out shots, all at once, covering a large chunk of the room with a flurry of wooden arrows. Every second or so they reloaded and fired again.

'Whoa!' Daisy yelled, jumping back.

Luigi gulped. On the bright side, the figures seemed incapable of turning. On the not-so-bright side, the chances of getting through that barrage without taking an arrow to the knee (or worse, the face) seemed very very low.

'Should I risk it?' Daisy asked.

'No. You really shouldn't.'

'That's what I thought. Alright Idea Man, whattaya got?'

The first thing to catch Luigi's attention was the tomato cart resting peacefully. Though its wooden walls had worn and were beginning to grow moss, it looked sturdy. Sturdy enough to withstand wooden arrows, at least.

'Maybe if we pushed that cart along, it would-' He began.

'Way ahead of ya!'

Daisy got behind the produce transportation, and put all her strength into pushing it forward. The difficulty came more from its rusted joints, not so much its weight. The wheels hardly moved, but the raw strength of the orange-clad princess overpowered the rust.

Well, the gloves sorta helped.

'Am I there yet?' She asked.

'Uh, a little more. You got one of them. Okay, that's the second one. And... that's it!'

She stopped pushing the cart on his word. The three figures continued to fire their weapons without question, but the arrows broke apart on the wooden panelling the very moment their stone tips struck it.

The sight made Daisy laugh. 'They must've stopped caring after the dungeon.'

'Well, was anyone meant to get past the dungeon?' Luigi asked.

'NNNope.'

As Luigi passed them, he could've sworn the figures repeated the same nonsense words the sentient suits of armour from the first room did. Did those words mean anything, or were they just gibberish? What gave them life? Questions that, perhaps, he didn't really want the answers to.

The next door led to a straight corridor that, aside from the abundant MacFrights banners, had nothing else inside. The corridor took a turn to the right, but otherwise that was it. The pre-recorded voice spoke for hopefully the last time. And unfortunately, Daisy couldn't see where it was.

'I had more of these to make than I thought. No way anyone's made it to the corridor. Eh, I have nothing else to do right now, and it's quite fun recording these! To those who have reached this corridor, you are practically finished! All there is left for you to do is enter the arena and battle King MacFrights himself. Congratulations!'

Luigi had expected something, anything, to attack them in that empty hallway. And yet, nothing happened. Daisy got to the door at the end no problem. Clearly, no one expected mere mortals to get anywhere near this spot.

'So, as long as that patronising voice wasn't lying to us,' Daisy said. 'We're finally at the end. Just gotta deal with a delusional idiot and we'll be done for real. Just let that victory sink in, sweetie.'

He adjusted the straps on his Poltergust, just to give himself a distraction. 'We're not really done. Are we?'

'What do you mean?'

'Arf?'

'I mean,' Luigi said. 'We haven't even explored half the floors yet. We... we were nearly squished and we still have so far to go.'

'We survived that stupid dungeon trap. That's enough of a victory for me.'

She opened the door and prayed that it truly did lead to the arena. Luigi shielded his eyes from the blinding light that seeped through the door, but he could hear Polterpup's excited barking.

'We made it!' Daisy yelled.

The princess pushed both the doors as far as they would go and ran into the middle of the arena. She laughed to herself, for no other reason but the pride she felt. Somehow, the coliseum looked even more grand from the inside. Luigi and Polterpup followed her swiftly. Luigi's attention immediately fell to a helmet-less suit of armour, resting in the corner. It appeared to be 'mounted' on a 'horse' made entirely of remains of broken suits. A spear rested in its hand, and its chest had been adorned with a target.

King MacFrights paced around his throne, apparently unaware of the mortals' arrival.

'Hey!' Daisy yelled, cupping her hands over mouth like a megaphone. 'Ye mortals doth arriveth in thy coliseum!'

MacFrights glanced at the heroes for a moment, seemingly ignored them, and then looked at them for real with his mouth agape.

'Thou... I... 'uh?' He stammered. 'Ow art thou mere mortals standingeth in me coliseum? No mortal doth ever passeth me traps! Thou must've cheatedeth!'

Daisy snickered. 'Nope! We got through them all! Including that stupid dungeon trap, by the way.'

'Daisy!' Luigi whispered to her. 'Do you always have to antagonise them?!'

The 'king' scowled. 'No! Impossible! There doth be something wrongeth with me traps. I cannot believeth me guards and knights... useless ye lot of them! Useless! I will 'aveth thy 'eads on a platter fer thy insolence!'

Daisy groaned; the guy was no less annoying now than he was at the beginning of this mess.

'I hope you remember our deal.' She said. 'We make it through your castle, and we can challenge you for that shiny gold thing.'

MacFrights bashed his fist on the railing of his platform. 'If that is what thou mortals wanteth, then I will 'oldeth up me end of ye deal. Ye jousting challenge begineth!'

Daisy cracked her knuckles. 'A joust with a runt like you? Yeah, I'm sure I can take it.'

Luigi yelped. 'D-Daisy, you really need to stop-'

The 'king' bellowed. 'So thou thinketh she will be fightingeth just me alone? Even I art awareth of me puny stature. Tis why I 'aveth me backup weapon!'

He flew away from his designated platform, and into the lifeless suit of armour. His small body disappeared within its metallic glory, and the shiny iron's gleam turned orange.

Luigi gulped. 'I-I have a bad feeling about this...'

A whole audience of ghosts emerged from the coliseum seats, a grand mix of Goobs, Hammers, and Oozers. Some even had bags of popcorn, and they cheered for their 'king'. Except they weren't real. They were merely cardboard cutouts, moving around on stands while pre-recorded cheering played.

The free arm of the armour twitched, followed by the horse's head rising slowly. The metal equine got to its non-existent hooves, floating a couple feet off the floor. The armour stood up with it, and raised its star-pointed spear into the air. Fully mounted, it easily dwarfed both the mortals.

MacFrights stuck his head out of the suit. 'What doth thee mortals thinketh of me armour? Doth thou not trembleth at thy knees of ye sight!'

Luigi certainly did, his knees trembling so much they were close to breaking. Daisy's own knees shook, but only for a moment.

'You're gonna have to try harder than that to scare me!' She yelled.

The plumber buried his face in his hands. 'Why do you have to keep doing this?'

MacFrights grinned. 'Doth thou thinketh I 'aveth nothing more? Yon match is just gettingeth started. Onward, Guinevere! Fastly!'

The horse buckled around, like he wasn't in total control of it. It galloped off, away from our heroes and instead towards the edge of the arena. While Daisy laughed, Luigi shuddered. No way the warrior's plan consisted of just prancing around.

And of course, he was right.

'YAAARRRRH!' MacFrights bellowed out his questionable battle cry.

The 'king' held his spear high into the air, the star at the end glowing bright. He continued to charge around as five small gates, that were seemingly just part of the arena's wall a moment ago, opened up. A small star tip poked out of each wall.

'Keep watch, sweetie!' Daisy said, spreading her legs out.

The stars revealed themselves to be the tips of arrows as they fired from their gates, one-by-one left to right. All aimed directly at our heroes.

'Oh boy!'

'Ah!'

Daisy jumped to the side, an arrow whizzing past her head. A second came her way, and she flew her arms up in front of her face. The tip of the arrow struck her metallic gloves and fell to the ground. She glanced down at it and chuckled. Luigi, seeing two arrows coming his way, activated a burst. The airy shockwave sent the arrows spiralling out of their course, breaking in two when they flopped pathetically onto the ground.

He glanced up, and saw the fifth and final arrow coming right for him.

'Dah!'

'Yip yip!'

Polterpup leapt up and yanked the arrow right out of the sky like it was merely a fetch stick. He shook it about, and chomped it to pieces.

Luigi dared to look, and smiled at his pet. 'Good puppy!'

The ghostly dog grinned widely, as all compliments made him do.

Daisy kicked at the remains of the wooden ammo. 'Is this really the best he had?'

King MacFrights laughed from behind them. 'Thou doth thinketh that waseth me best attack? HA HA! Thou hath falleneth for me distraction. GIDDY-UP, GUINEVERE!'

The trio turned around, and saw MacFrights giving his 'horse' a kick to the flank and charging forward. He lowered his lance down, lifting his head out just to make sure he had it angled perfectly.

And he only gave them a second.

'Ah!' Daisy yelped.

The princess, not weighed down by anything, leapt out the spear's way before it even got close. Alas, the heavy Poltergust slowed Luigi down. When he tried to move, he found that he couldn't; the star tip had hooked under the back of his shirt, just above the Poltergust. He pushed against the lance, but it held him in place.

Each unsuccessful pull only made him more and more terrified. Tears came to his eyes as he screamed out.

'MARIOOO! HELP ME!'

Daisy stood in place, watching in shock. Not a single part of her body even twitched.

'RUFF! RRRUFF!' Polterpup barked at the 'king' angrily.

MacFrights returned to hiding in his iron host, and lifted the end of his lance up a bit, just enough so Luigi's feet left the floor. The plumber flailed his limbs in a fruitless attempt to get free.

'Let him go, you fake king!' Daisy demanded, shaking her fist at him and highly doubting he would listen.

The 'king' merely laughed. 'Ye fair maiden tryeth ta stopeth me? Thee really believeth that I would listeneth? Art thy brain small? Watcheth this!'

With no effort at all, MacFrights raised his lance and pointed it at the sky with Luigi still attached. He held it up as high as the metal suit arm would allow. Luigi saw the floor moving away from him, and next thing he knew he was above even the highest point of the arena. When he committed the mistake of looking down at the great drop below - and at a terrified princess next to an even more petrified dog - the drop felt as tall as Mount Wario.

'MAAARIOOO!' He cried in desperation, caring none for how futile it was.

'LUIGI!' Daisy shouted.

'Thou art a 'ardy one. Even I will admiteth that. But I knoweth thou will be ineth fer ye world of pain!'

He flung his lance back, just a bit. But that little bit was enough to unhook Luigi. The plumber closed his eyes, not daring to see the floor getting closer to him. He fell for agonisingly long hours. At least, it felt like hours to him.

'LUIIIGIII!'

*THUD* He hit the floor chest first.

The only sounds that could be heard after that sickening thud were Daisy's heavy breathing, and the excited pre-recorded cheering from the cardboard crowd.

Luigi winced as the pain erupted through him. He struggled to keep his eyes open, and everything around him became barely legible blurs. Something orange, no doubt Daisy, ran up to him and got on her knees. A smaller white something, clearly Polterpup, sat by her side and licked his cheek gently.

'Luigi, sweetie? Luigi! Talk to me, please!'

'I'm... alright...' He gasped out.

A bold-faced lie if there ever was one.

Daisy was torn between sighing in relief and screaming out more. 'You sure? Do... do you think you'll be okay?'

He put on the best smile he could, and looked her in the eye. 'Yeah... I'll be fine... but it might - owie - take a while...'

Daisy smiled, weakly but genuinely.

'HA HA HA!' MacFrights laughed behind her.

The sound of his mockery reminded her of the battle at hand. She leapt to her feet, making sure she fenced off the path between her plumber and the 'king'. In a moment of defensiveness, she felt as if she could stop the lance like a brick wall.

The lights on the Phantasma-Gloves got bright. Really bright.

'Polterpup,' She muttered to the dog who looked up her immediately. 'Stay by Luigi. I'll handle this. By myself.'

Polterpup gave her a nod, and perched himself by Luigi's side.

MacFrights's triumphant laughter echoed from within his metallic shell. 'And I thoughteth ye green peasant would be 'arder ta defeateth than yon! But it appeareth that thee waseth a mere weakling. I 'ath battledeth rodents with more might than him!'

Daisy gritted her teeth. The gloves' lights grew even brighter, alongside the rage that boiled within her.

'HEY!'

The 'king's' laughter stopped.

'Come at me!' The princess shouted.

MacFrights stuck his head out. 'Doth thou challengeth me? That is what I liketh ta see! Tis more fun if ye challenger doth not runneth away!'

Daisy circled around him slowly, keeping her eyes directly on the tip of the lance.

'You gonna go already?! Ye princess awaiteth!'

'I shall answereth thy call! Fastly Guinevere!'

The 'horse' buckled, and charged forward. MacFrights lowered his lance, and held it back as if planning to skewer right through her. All the way, she stood still. Luigi felt like an ocean's worth of pressure had been dropped on him as he tried to lift himself up.

'Daisy...!' He yelled in a hoarse voice. 'L... Look out...!'

Unable to read her own thoughts through the anger that clouded her mind, Daisy held her arms out.

'Tis ye endeth of ye road for thee, fair maiden!'

He stopped, not by his own control, abruptly enough to give him whiplash.

'... What?!'

Peeping out from behind his safe zone, he couldn't believe it. And neither could Luigi.

'D-Daisy...?'

The princess stood her ground, her shoes scraping against the floor as MacFrights continued his failed attempts to turn her into a human kebab. She held onto the star-tipped end of the spear, so tight she almost broke it. MacFrights shuddered when he saw the unbridled anger in her eyes. She didn't even seem to struggle, though her knees trembled.

'Now listen here, you delusional actor.' She yelled through gritted teeth. 'Give me that shiny gold thing, before I take it back myself!'

The 'king', despite being completely unable to get his lance back, just grinned. 'Doth thou thinketh I will giveth up ye gold yon easily? I ameth a king, and a good king fightseth until he goesth down with his kingdom!'

Luigi found the strength within him to lift his heavy, aching body off the floor with grave difficulty. Polterpup helped by grabbing him by the overall straps and carrying him up.

'Margherita!' The plumber yelled. 'H-He'll-' He coughed due to his weakening throat. 'He'll skewer you alive!'

Daisy could pay him no attention. Her focus fell purely on making the 'king' pay.

'YOU ASKED FOR IT!'

She pulled the lance in closer, and flung it over her shoulders with hardly any effort.

*CLA-ANK* *CRASH*

It hit the ground with the most ear-drum-shattering metallic sound imaginable. Bits of metal went flying around the arena, scattering all over the floor. The entire free arm fell off, and half of the 'horse's' framework could be seen.

Luigi, who had his hands over his ears, stared in shock and awe. 'D-Daisy...?'

Polterpup dropped the overall straps when his own jaw fell open. MacFrights popped his head out, his eyes spinning around in every direction.

'I seeth that thou fair maiden is... is tougher than I previously thoughteth. But you willeth 'ath to, uh, to try 'arder than that.'

By this point, her face was bright red. 'So that wasn't enough, huh? You wanna more, huh? Alright. I'LL GIVE YOU MORE!'

She lifted it over her head once again and slammed it into the floor a second time. Even more pieces flew off, one coming uncomfortably close to smacking Luigi in the face. The only thing left of the 'horse' was its wooden frame, and MacFrights had been dismounted from it entirely. He held onto his lance, but had to resort to dragging the giant metal body around by his regular spindly ghost arm.

It was like he was the sole survivor of an attack, and was now dragging his dying body back to the real king to report their loss.

'GET OVER HERE!'

Daisy ignored the lance and went straight for what was left of the main body. She held it up above her head, not even breaking a sweat, and chucked it across the entire coliseum. It struck the drawbridge-shaped door that led to the exit stairs, and broke apart into hundreds of pieces that went flying in a glorious metal explosion.

Luigi could finally say something. 'Go Daisy!'

When the hundreds of metal bits settled, it left a dazed MacFrights in the middle of the clanking debris. He held a sword and a shield, both seemingly held together with duct tape. The lights on Daisy's gloves faded, retaining only about half their brightness.

'Looks art deceivingeth...!' The dazed 'king' mumbled. 'When Ms Gravely is involvedeth!'

Daisy groaned. 'Did thou forgeteth about thy battle?'

MacFrights slammed his shield into his own face - on purpose, mind you - and got his head back into the game.

He smirked. 'I must admiteth, thee fair maiden art a powerful fighter. Thou would maketh a fine warrior! It 'ath beeneth centuries since I last 'adeth a fight like yon. I appreciateth ye glorious battle!'

'Thanks. Now how about thou handeth- ugh, you hand that gold thing over?'

He shook his head. 'Nah, lassie. A king must fighteth until ye end! But thou should not worryeth. Thy prowess in battle will no doubt equaleth victory!'

Daisy didn't know if she should've been annoyed or happy, but either way she stood ready to finish the match.

'Luigi, get the strobulb ready!' Daisy yelled. 'I have a feeling that this match is just about over.'

Luigi fumbled his flashlight around, and approached the 'king' cautiously as he charged up his weapon. MacFrights held up his sword and bellowed out his battle cry once again. He swung his sword around like a tornado. Unlike his prowess with his lance, his ability to use a sword seemed to be lacking. Daisy held her arm out casually, like she was just opening a door, and grabbed onto the blade when it clanked against her hand. His shield fell to the ground and dragged him down with it.

Despite the embarrassing position, the 'king' smiled. 'Now yon is ye might I expectedeth from thou, lassie! But ye real question is - willeth thy green friend proveth his worth in a battle?'

Luigi wasn't so sure.

'Arf arf!' According to Polterpup, yes.

The plumber unleashed the Strobulb, stunning the 'king' without giving him a chance to block the rays. MacFrights fought the pull of the Poltergust almost as well as Soulfflé, dragging his shield against the ground.

'And now!' He announced. 'Tis time fer ye finishin' move! Goeth, thou green man, and emergeth victorious!'

Luig chuckled. 'And I shalleth emergeth victorious! Now... eth.' He declared, the most confident that night.

He delivered the 'finishing move' onto MacFrights, slamming his body into the ground four times until he let go of the shield.

'And ye winner is...' He said. 'Ye fair maiden and her li'l green friend!'

And just like that, he disappeared into the Poltergust.

'BOOOOO!' The fake crowd jeered.

'To you too!' Daisy yelled.

Perhaps in response to her, the cardboard cut-outs sunk back into the stage. The Poltergust nozzle rattled around and glowed yellow before the next elevator button shot out of it. The 'shiny gold thing' landed right into Daisy's hand.

'Ya know,' She said. 'That delusional actor may have had a bigger ego than Bowser, but you gotta love a guy who congrats those who beat him.' She glanced at the button. 'Floor seven? I saw that one the map. That's the-' She gasped, and smiled wildly. 'THE GARDEN! Ohmygosh, we have to go. Right now!'

'R-Right now?'

'Yeah! It's an indoor garden, sweetie! Can you imagine all the pretty plants? I gotta see it, now!'

She grabbed his wrist, and dragged him away as she charged for that elevator. She was going to have that indoor garden date with Luigi, and no ghost was going to stop her.


KING WILLIAM MACFRIGHTS, THE FAUX RULER

AGE - 42

GENDER - Male

CAUSE OF DEATH - Poisoned during a play

King MacFrights once ruled a powerful nation in a beautiful kingdom with an ironclad yet kind-hearted fist! Or, at least, he thinks he did. Truthfully, he is just an actor who died in the middle of a play. Thanks to his last role being that of a king, he has delusions in the afterlife that he actually was an awesome ruler when he never really was. No one buys his lies, so he has to make fake crowds to cheer for him during his jousting tournaments.

Author Notes - The entire fight with MacFrights was to provide Daisy with the opportunity to prove her worth, as well as justify the use of the Phantasma-Gloves in the first place. This won't be the last of Daisy's solo missions, especially when it comes to the Boilerworks.

Most people tend to give MacFrights a mighty backstory involving kingdoms and dying heroically in battle. So, why is mine totally different? Aside from the usual 'I wanted to be different' thing, the idea actually came about from TV Tropes, of all things. The character page for MacFrights pointed out that the fake crowds implied that he had no real authority whatsoever. And, seeing as he's a Scottish king, he's likely named after King MacBeth. You know, a character in a play. In fact, the first name 'William' came from William Shakespeare.