Tales of the falls
I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!
...Responses...
MysterD47: I like it!...oh yeah, the one's where Lincoln get's his trunks ripped off by crabs and Marco ends up outside naked?
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AN: this story was inspired by GojiraCipher. Give HIS stories a read! Their good!
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Dipper grumbled as he walked naked down the sidewalk. Wearing nothing but a backpack and Wendy's hat, he was too furious to even bother covering himself...
"Dipper wait!" Dipper turns around and irritably glares at Emma, Maize, and Ivy. "What do you want?" He demanded, hands folded across his chest.
Emma sighed, "Look Dipper...you made some good points back their...but frankly even if you hadn't, it in no way excuses what we just did to you... It was completely uncalled for and- Sweet, upside down cake how small is your dick?!" Exclaimed a flustered Emma in sudden amazement.
His anger finally submitting to embarrassment, Dipper sighed as he promptly turned his backpack around to cover his crotch. "Great apology, you should make a career of this." Says an annoyed Dipper sarcastically.
Emma groans, Ivy steps in- while making sure to keep her eyes from straying below his face - 'Sorry, okay? Were trying to say were sorry...but we REALLY need you here! It's getting dark and we have no idea how to get home! If you help us...I SWEAR will make it all up to you...please!" She pleaded.
Dipper was annoyed at the sheer gal of these girls..but...
Dipper sighed, "Your lucky I hate leaving girls hurt and alone..." Dipper shuddered...too many bad memories...
The girls thanked him, Dipper brushed this off and just asked where their homes are.
"Oh, our home is just an RV it should be parked at Eastwood trailer park-
"Wait, I'm sorry...you ALL live together?"
"Uh...yeah...were sisters."
Dipper just looks at them blankly, "Uhhhh...
"OUR MOM HAD AN ACTIVE SOCIAL LIFE, OKAY!?" They all snapped annoyed.
Dipper wisely decided to drop the subject...justified anger or not, their was some minefield's you just didn't step in...
Who turns around to look at the neighborhood to get his bearings, he knew he was basically mooning the three girls...but unless he wanted his crotch exposed he didn't have any other option.
"Okay...where are we? Let's see...Burk's pizza joint...Carl's auto-repair...a bunch of monsters attacking drivers during Rush-hour- WAIT, WHAT!?"
Sure enough...the town was in ruins...and monsters were everywhere!
To any other kid, this would've been a nightmare...but Dipper...he was just annoyed. "It's Taco Tuesday all over again." He says out-loud as he puts his backpack back into a more optimal fighting position- modesty be fracked!
"Wha?" Asks all three flustered girls suddenly...they'd been too busy admiring Dipper's rear view to see what was happening...and unfortunately for Dipper...these girls WERE other kids...
They immediately screamed and ran, 'Wait, dang it, no! We need to stick together!" Dipper groans as he runs after them, "Dang rookies." He grouses as he runs after them-
HOKAHEY!
The girls screamed as they dodged the zombie tribal chief's (Actually, it was a zombie of a third-rate Indian impersonator, who died due to a headdress malfunction. But that's neither here nor there...)war-club.
Dipper calmly took out his shrink-light and made the guys club shrink to ant size, the Chief was so surprised that Dipper was able to get behind and smack his head off-
Most zombies would be tougher...but this guy was just a beginner boss(-plus all the other zombie mojo was being used against Wendy, so he was extra drained.), so he fell pretty easily.
All three girls watched the naked boy who just an hour ago they hated with a deep passion...kill a monster like it was a hose-fly!
"W-who are you?" Asked Emma with Stars in her eyes -her sisters equally star struck-
Dipper calmly raided the corpse...nothing much...save for some spare machine parts and some glowey gem-like tokens...and a loincloth.
Dipper turns to the girls, adjusts Wendy's trappers hat and puts the loincloth on like a badass. "I'm the guy who's going to keep you three alive." He said dramatically-
BOOM!
Right before his loincloth exploded, Dipper screamed in pain as he curled up in a fetal-position to clutch his now ruined genitals while blubbering like a baby...The girls just watched stunned...
Nearby an invisible Slenderman laughs as he tosses away the detonator, "Oh, don't look at me like that! You laughed and you know it!" He said to the audience accusingly...
He then turns to D. Caste Raider and his gang, "You know what you have to do..." The mad outlaw just laughed, saluted...and got to work...
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TO BE CONTINUED?
AN: Want me to continue this? I'm willing to take Bribes! Publish a chapter of my 'Shake up the Falls' Challenge before anyone else and I'll update the next chapter this plus two other stories!
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