Tales of the Falls

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

...

ANNOUNCEMENT!

I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!

SUMMARY:
On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!

The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher, also available at Amazon, Inkitt and BarnesandNoble.

...responses...

NyaNyaKittyFace: 1. Funny. 2. Interesting you should bring that up... 3. (shrug) thank RasenganFin for that...

Gamelover41592: thank you

ImperialStar: Could you be more specific?

...

"I can't believe were rescuing a NORTHWEST of all people", growled Wendy as she and Dipper trudged into the Gravity Falls Forest...

It had been over a week since the 'incident'. Shockingly, despite losing their mansion and all their bank accounts...the Northwests still made up for it in raw assets, valuables, companies and interests...

Preston even joked that the amount they lost...is what they made in a week...

Wendy is obviously initially disgusted by the conspicuous consumption the Northwests undergo on a daily basis while her father works tooth and nail to provide for his family and she works too...until Dipper reminds her that they still got one over on the Northwests, more importantly her family won't really need to work anymore thanks to all the money they swiped.

In any case Preston was offering a large sum for his daughters safe return- he was milking the 'Grieving father' PR angle for all it's worth...plus Dipper felt guilty about the whole thing...feeling they'd gone too far...

...and then they encounter Gnomes-

"Wendy run! They work together to turn into a gnome conglomeration to kidnap girls!" Shouts Dipper protectively. "That'd be hard to punt." Admitted Wendy.

The gnomes shrug with indifference, "Eh, not interested." They said dismissively at Wendy.

Wendy is naturally offended, "And why not?! I'm a babe!" "She sure is..." Thinks Dipper to himself...

The gnome shrugs, "Eh, we like 'em' short and husky." He admitted. Wendy laughs, "Yep that's Mable...but seriously though, you guys see a blonde girl? Kinda stuck up?"

The gnome's laugh, "She'll be our new queen! You'll never find her! Do your worse! We-

Wendy picks him up and gives him a noogie, "gah! Ow! So annoying! Fine! We'll talk!" "Aww man Wendy's so awesome!"
Thinks Dipper as said red head leads the way...

...

Pacifica is hanging naked from a branch. "You've only yourself to blame for your constant escape attempts!" Said Jeff, Pacifica glared.

...this is the scene Wendy and Dipper walks into...she then responds by knocking Jeff over with a tossed gnome, Wendy is SOOOOO not cool with any of this! "I am okay with humiliating someone, kicking their butt, and outright framing someone for a crime I committed!" Listed off Wendy, "But forced group marriage to a minor! That crosses the line!"

Pacifica just looks at them miffed..."Really?! That crosses a line for you?!" "Do you want to be saved or not?!" "...yes."

Jeff glared, "Foolish girl! We gnomes are an awesome, ancient and powerful race! You know not what you dabble with-

Wendy effortlessly grabbed and drop-kicked him off a nearby cliff...

Without a leader, the gnomes were completely useless and easy to pick off by Dipper and Wendy...

When Wendy finishes pummeling the last gnome, Dipper frees Pacifica from the branch and she starts crying in his arms- much to his bewildered embarrassment as the cute naked girl pressed herself against him- "It's been 6 days! They fed me nothing but mushrooms and chipmunk meat!" "They didn't violate you did they?" Asked Dipper concerned. "The stupid leader says that the Gnome Queen has a 7 day honeymoon period before anything happens."

"Wow that was close." Said Wendy relieved then apologizes to Pacifica for their stunt and says "It's been a very stressful month for me and Dipper. Like some some Jackass higher power has thrown disaster after disaster at us..."

Later after Pacifica is given clothe and Wendy has to leave them for a bit to get the money wired to them... "So how long they've been dating?" Dipper is surprised by that question, to which Pacifica replies: "The way you two have been acting i thought you were dating. It's kinda cute in a pit bull dates puppy kind of way."

Dipper blushes, "I'm just glad your cool with us after...'y'know..."

Pacifica shrugged, "Eh, water under the bridge."

Dipper smiles, thanks her and goes to find Wendy...

Pacifica's smile turns to a glare; "Yeah, right. You humiliate me, rob me, burn down my house and leave me naked and at the mercy of freaky little men...oh, no Corduroy...there WILL be a reckoning...and I think I'll take your hearts desire too while I'm at it." She thinks that last bit as she glances at dipper's retreating backside with a smirk...

...…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

AN: Want me to continue this? I'm willing to take Bribes! Publish a chapter of my 'Shake up the Falls' Challenge before anyone else and I'll update the next chapter this plus two other stories!

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