Tales of the Falls
I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!
...
ANNOUNCEMENT!
I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!
SUMMARY:
On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!
The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher, also available at Amazon, Inkitt and BarnesandNoble.
...responses...
Gamelover41592: thank you
Wicked.A: thank you
The Howling Behemoth: 1. hmmmm...something to consider. 2. Thank you
...
Soos looked around confused as he and his friends entered the medieval golf-course. "Why did we come here again? Not to bring up a sore subject, but Mini-golf is really more Mable's thing...and you guys aren't really on speaking terms right now- Indeed, although Mable was there...she'd come at a separate, early time and clearly was not speaking to anyone...
Dipper sighed, "To be fair I did build a mini-golf course in our room with her...which Mable then destroyed for her slumber party." He says that last part darkly.
"I have SOME interest in it...but it's not my favorite thing...more like 17th favorite thing."
"Okay...what about the first 16 then?" Asked Soos.
Wendy ticked off her fingers. "Shack is being fumigated, so 1 through 7 is out, arcade has Blubs stuck in the claw machine, pool is still closed, the diner was burnt down by Susan...again, laser tag is shut down while in the middle of a lawsuit from Toby, the rain flooded the forest so 12 through 16 is out...that just left mini-golf." She explained.
Soos scratched his head, "Huh...we'll good info-dump anyway."
"Hey, guys! What's up?" They turn around and see Pacifica.
"Hey Pacifca! how are you? Doing better?"
Pacifica smirked, "oh, much better! In fact...after today I have a felling I'll feel even better!"
"We'll good for you Pacifica...say want to play golf with us?"
"I'd be delighted to! Oh, by the way. Dipper, I found this in a weird shop today...you like odd things right? Would you like it?"
She produced a voodoo doll covered in a blue hoodie and a bunch of needles stabbing the groin.
Dipper winched, he felt for whoever that voodoo doll had originally been for, but being a connoisseur of the crazy he took it and thanked her."
"No...thank you." Said Pacifica with a smirk as she flicked a weird ring on her finger...
...
"Hey! I got a hole in one!" Shouts Soos excited and looks around to see if anyone saw his achievement...no one did. Not even his friend Wendy! He slumps in disappointment, She's too busy glaring at Dipper who's too busy looking at Pacifica.
At first Wendy had enjoyed this, whenever Wendy went to retrieve her ball from the hole Dipper kept looking at her backside and when she straightens flinging her hair, Dipper saw it in slow motion and is very happy...
And then Pacifica showed up...suddenly Wendy can't make any good shots at all! They keep coming back at her and smacking her in the face. Worse, when Pacifica goes to grab her ball- she's been having NOTHING but holes in one all night! -she bends over and pretends to have difficulties keeping it still and just shakes her butt around to show it off to a now captivated Dipper.
Mabel is obviously upset that Pacifica is flirting with Dipper but doesn't say anything cause it ticks off Wendy...Dipper, despite Wendy's best efforts...seems unable to be away from PACIFICA! It was making her blood boil! Feeling furious, angry and tired she sits down next to the Dutch Obstacle and bops his head against it, hearing tiny screams.
Confused, Wendy crawls inside seeing if someone was trapped in there...
...
Dipper didn't understand it...there was something...INTOXICATING about Pacifica today...he felt DRUNK being arou8nd her...he just...he couldn't get enough of being by her side! Wait...wasn't...wasn't there someone else he was supposed to be with? Everything seemed fuzzy-
"PACIFICA!"
Everyone turned to see an enraged red head, grasping a ball-like creature in her hand running at the rich blonde.
Mable screams.
Soos weeps.
Dipper blinks confused.
Pacifca...smiles?
Wendy slams into her and beasts the living daylight out of her...which immediately gets her arrested.
"Your under arrest for beating up a Northwest! Our town charter says that's a 'for-life' sentence!" Shouts Blubs. Together they toss they baffled Wendy into the back of their police car.
Pacifica smirks as she flicks her ring again...and Dipper snaps out of it, "Ow...my head...what happened?" Then the events of the last couple hours come into focus, "Wait...WENDY! Wendy's been arrested! Wh-Why didn't I stop that? Wait...why was I ignoring Wendy?"
"Oh, that would because of the 'lust ring' I was wearing." Admits Pacifica.
Dipper's eye's widen, "Lust ring?"
Pacifca chuckles, "I need to thank you guys, you opened my eyes to a whole other world...this supernatural stuff is crazy!" She shows off the ring, "This bad boy can let me hook the attention of one man...in exchange for eventually making said boy's 'partner' want to beat me up! That, plus Wendy discovering I'd been Bribing the lilliputtians to mess up her shots all night- points to a still queasy Hanz who'd been carried forcibly by Wendy -and that 'tip- off' I gave to Blubs to be here...and Wendy practically jumped into my trap. True, I had to get a bit hurt...but a small price to pay for revenge!"
Dipper gulped, "Revenge?"
Pacifica smirked, "And that's not even the best part...the 'impotence' doll has probably already done a number on you."
Dipper paled, "IMPOTENCE!?" A quick check showed that...
Dipepr groaned, "Awwww man! I just FINALLY grew to average size!" He moaned as he felt that his 'package' was now 'useless' in every since of the word... it was also tiny again.
Dipper glared, "What we ever do to you?"
Pacifica glared, "You murdered hundreds of my innocent servants...dozens of my not-so innocent servants, burned my mansion down, nearly feed me to zombies, posted my naked body online for everyone to see, swindled me out of a large fortune, AND LEFT ME TO DIE AND BE RAPED BY GNOMES!" She screamed.
Dipper's eye's widened...the sighed, "Okay...that's fair...any chance I can convince you to let Wendy go? Keep me impotent if you must, throw me in jail if you must...but let Wendy go..."
Pacifica smirked, "Oh, don't worry Dipper...do a couple things for me...and Wendy is free." She then laughs maniacally...Dipper gulps...
...
TO BE CONTINUED?
AN: Didn't see that coming, did you?
AN: Want me to continue this? I'm willing to take Bribes! Publish a chapter of my 'Shake up the Falls' Challenge before anyone else and I'll update the next chapter this plus two other stories!
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