Tales of the Falls

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

...III...

ANNOUNCEMENT!

I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!

SUMMARY:
On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!

The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher, also available at Amazon, Inkitt and BarnesandNoble.

...responses...

Gamelover41592: Thank you

Wicked.A: First of all, her BODY is fine, it was her SOUL that was ripped apart and devoured...as for if she's 'dead' or not...that's a bit more complicated.

The Howling Behemoth: Hmmm...All good choices...what to pick?

zacharylee53899: uh...sure?

Guest: I'll add it to the plot-bunny pile.

...III...

Dipper sighed as Pacifica took more picture of him in the buff- her comments on how she needed to use the 'microscope lens' to see 'anything' was also not helping his ego - "Okay, come on pacifica...I got you the holy grail, found you the golden Fleece, and then did hundreds of embarrassing nude photos and video's...will you just let Wendy go already?" He pleaded.

Pacifica smirked, "One last thing...and I'll consider us square. I'm going to get ready for the big night, I've already talked with Mable about what you need to do, go to her and she'll explain the rest." And with that she saunters away and leaves Dipper to his own devices...

Dipper sighs, Why was he not surprised that Mable was in on this? Things had gotten downright frosty between them lately...

Deep breath Dipper, just one more job...and Wendy is free. You've already survived Commie-Nazi's, Cyclopes-Kraken and internet humiliation...anything after that should be a piece of cake..." He thinks to himself as he heads toward the local theater where Mable awaits...

...

Dipper looks at his sister dumbly, "I'm sorry, you want me to do what?" He asked stupefied.

Mable smiles, "Use your dumb book to abandon your body, take possession of my star puppet and do my puppet-paloza so I can impress a cute boy!" Mable was so happy! She and Dipper were going to do things as a team again!

Dipper just stared at her in disbelief...

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ZAP!

"Yeah...were not doing this." Says Dipper flatly as he walks away from the Mable's now souless body and the Mable puppet as it flares around angrily...

And then Gabe shows up... "Hello! Mable! I was wondering- Well, hello darling! Your new to town aren't you?" Asked Gabe sensually as he picked up the Mable puppet...

Needless to say...Mable would be over her boy-crazy phrase FOREVER after tonight...

...

"Uh, not to sound ungrateful...but why didn't you do this in the first place?" Asked Wendy as she's freed from jail after Dipper used the shrinking flashlight on the cameras in the police office, he then shrunk Durland and threatens Blubs with ingesting him.

Dipper sighs, "I know you don't want to hear this Wendy...but we DID go to far with the 'zombies attacking the Northwest Mansion', so I felt I owed it to Pacifica to at least TRY and play ball...but then she went too far."

Once Wendy's freed, her arrest paperwork is burned and given 5 free arrest passes...

Dipper then storms the New Northwest Manor with a smaller Crystal set to a small Flashlight which he uses to shrink Preston Northwest's head when he refuses Dipper entrance to his home, Wendy is following and punches him in the junk as she passes. Preston- now unable to distinguish depth very well was powerless to do anything but stumble to the ground

Pacifica flees but Dipper just shrinks everything she hides behind. She cowers when Dipper approaches her thinking he's going to beat her for sending Wendy to jail... but all he does is just seize the master voodoo pin and breaks it, which restores his junk to normal not peanut size.

Dipper checks his pants and sighs relieved- Wendy also finds herself relived...much to her embarrassment -and tells Wendy they can go.

"WHAT!? Were just going to let her go!? Shouts Wendy rightly pissed, having hoped to see him give her a black eye. Dipper sighs. "Wendy, I'm sorry to say this, but we REALLY did go to far with the Zombie assault, People DIED Wendy! INNOCENT people! Sure I could punch her eye for getting you arrested but then she's have reason to get me arrested, and then we'd retaliate, she'd retaliate, and so on...as it stands Who's going to believe that a kid like me came in shrinking stuff to undo a voodoo curse? Certainly not the cops." Dipper sighs, "I just want this cycle to end before it escalates." He then turns to Pacifca, "Speaking of Cycles...Look around you Pacifica." They're in the Northwest storage room of shame.

Pacifica is horrified, "I...I've never been in here before." She admits.

"The Northwest Family is a clan of liars cheats thieves and clown enthusiasts." Stated dipper darkly

"Hey that's my mom! She married into the family!" Defends Pacifica angrily.

"Still counts! She's just another link in the worlds worst chain. Repeating the same abusive passive aggressive behavior her parents and grandparents did to each other." Dipper turns to look at Pacifica "I thought you were better than your parents, I thought you put your past behind you but you didn't. I've seen the way people talk about you, it's not nice. When you're not around your so called friends say some pretty vicious things. That your attitude is the only thing keeping anyone from becoming real friends with you. If you want to me to be your friend I suggest you stop with the attitude and start being nice. I honestly thought of you as a friend Pacifica." Those words break her heart.

Dipper continues to glare. "I should just leave you to rot...but for better or for worse, we DID have it coming for what we did to you...So if You want REAL friends see me in a week, I don't want to see you for a while."

Dipper then signals to Wendy that he's ready to go but then Pacifica blurts our "My parents hit me when I don't do what they want me to do. I'm scared Dipper I really am..." Pacifica cries as they pause to glance at each other, her, then each other...

Wendy sighs, "Were gonna have to forgive her completely, pretend the last week never happened, and befriend her aren't we?" Asked Wendy with annoyed resignation.

Dipper also sighs but nods, "Sometimes...it sucks being the good guys."

On the way out Dipper restores Preston's head and Wendy slams him against the wall with her hatchet at his throat "if I hear you hit Pacifica for anything harder than swatting a mosquito I will personally come here, cut your balls off and feed them to you with caviar on toast points! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!" Wendy threatens Preston...who's quiet...turns out Wendy had accidentally slammed his head into a loose nail in the wall...killing him instantly...

A pale Dipper...who'd been filming Preston wet himself...quickly deleted the video off Wendy's phone...while Wendy vomits...Dipper shrinks the corpse and feeds it Scmebulock, bleaches away any other evidence...and walks Wendy away comforting her...

...a week later...

"Y'know you don't have to do this." Said Dipper, Pacifica shook her head..."You guys gave me WAY more chances then I deserved...More importantly I owe Wendy for killing my dad-"

"Never thought I'd here someone say THAT." Said Wendy surprised.

Pacifca smirked, "In any case...I want to make things right with Wendy...to PROVE I can be a good friend to all of you." She says as she follows Wendy up the roof shack...

Wendy tells Dipper not follow them and refuses to tell him what she's planning and just tells him to go outside and 'enjoy the show'...

Dipper walks outside curious, looks to the roof-

GAH!

Just in time to see a naked Pacifica jump screaming from the roof, riding the pine tree as she dose so...

Dipper flustered, "What?"

Pacifica hits the ground unconscious...

When she comes too both Wendy and Dipper are looking down at her and Dipper has a funny look and she asks "what's with the look?"

"Hmmm... so you ARE a real Blonde."

The pieces fall together and Pacifica remembers she jumped naked, She screams an covers herself.

Wendy laughs and tosses her her clothes, "Okay, were even."

...III…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

AN: Want me to continue this? I'm willing to take Bribes! Publish a chapter of my 'Shake up the Falls' Challenge before anyone else and I'll update the next chapter this plus two other stories!

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