Chapter 14: Wednesday, December 19, 1979

"It's better to trust the man who is frequently in error than to trust the man who is never in doubt."

-Eric Sevareid


Hermione pushed open the door to Lily and James' cottage, shivering as the gust of frigid wind kicked up behind her, blowing her hair forward to cover her face. She stepped into the small foyer, making sure the door clicked shut behind her before unlacing her boots, to slip them off.

"Hey Lily?!" Hermione called out, in the direction of the sitting room. "Have you got any crushed ashwinder?" She kicked her boots off and padded into the living room, still talking while she walked. "I've been tinkering with a hangover potion and I think if I add- oh. Hi, James. Where's Lily?"

James was sitting in the armchair closest to the fireplace, a copy of the Daily Prophet in hand. His legs were crossed, his ankle sitting propped up on his knee, and his glasses slid down his nose. He took a sip from a steaming mug, looking over the paper at her, a lopsided smile on his face.

He looked so much like Harry, it was almost painful.

"She and Remus went Christmas shopping," James said, motioning to the tray sitting on the coffee table. "Tea?"

"Yes, that'd be lovely." Hermione said, unfastening her cloak and taking a seat on the sofa across from him.

James leaned forward and poured the hot liquid into a mug, reaching for the sugar.

"What time is it?" James asked.

"Erm… Just past one, I believe. Why?"

He smiled again, putting two lumps of sugar into her tea and just a few drops of cream. "You take your tea sweeter in the afternoon than you do in the morning," James explained. "Just wanted to make sure I got it right."

He handed the mug to her and she tilted her head to the side, shaking it a bit as she laughed, "I suppose I do," she said. "That's a very specific thing to remember."

James shrugged, settling back into the comfortable position he had been in before she interrupted him. He folded the copy of the Prophet he had been reading in half, tossing it onto the coffee table. "It doesn't take any effort to remember the way someone likes their tea, especially when they lived with you for a spell," he said. "Would've been rude of me to not notice, honestly."

She felt her heart tug, the ache for Harry growing every time she spoke to James. Harry was so much like his father, it was unreal. Harry had a knack for remembering how everyone in the house took their tea. It was almost a game they made of it, on the calmer days when things weren't life or death, to see if Harry could remember exactly how everyone took their tea and at what time of day.

Harry always got it right.

"Are you okay?" James asked, "You look a bit peaky."

Hermione chuckled, taking a sip of the perfectly prepared tea. "I'm all right. Where's Sirius?"

"Trying to get a permit for his motorbike. Apparently it requires a completely different type of licence to operate it. He got caught by the muggle police yesterday and had to confund the poor sod to get out of being arrested."

"Didn't he research the laws before buying it?"

James snorted, "Sirius? No! Absolutely not! That would take half the fun out of it for him, I think."

Hermione chuckled quietly and continued to sip on her tea. She had rarely been alone with James, since she arrived in this time. She hadn't actively seeked him out, that was for sure. With Lily, it was easier. Sometimes, the way she said something, or the look in her eyes would make Hermione's heart skip a beat. But she could always bury it quickly. With James, it was much harder. Even with Harry looking like an almost carbon copy of his father, he acted like him too. They laughed the same way with the same lopsided smile that tugged up much further on the right side than the left. They sat in chairs the same way and ate the same way. They both ran their hands through their hair, resting them on the back of their neck when they were irritated or nervous, something James was doing at this very moment.

"Is everything okay, James?" Hermione asked, watching his fingers card through his hair and settle on the back of his neck for a moment.

"May I ask you something?"

"You may," Hermione said, the rim of her mug pressing to her lips.

"What is it with you and Remus?"

Hermione nearly choked on the hot tea. She coughed a few times, her eyes watering a bit as she cleared her airways of the tea. "E-excuse me? What do you mean?"

James chuckled, his eyes dancing with a light she hadn't seen in them in the short time she'd been here. A glint that said he knew something she didn't, a mischief that Harry got in his eyes when he had an idea in his head he was sure of, something that would more than likely cause more issues than it was worth.

"You see," James began. "Remus is my best mate, I know him like I know myself. He's different, since you've been here. It's like he wants to talk to you, but doesn't know how. And Remus very rarely wants to talk to anyone. You do little things for him, I've noticed- so has Lily, for that matter. You enlarging the furniture for him, keeping chocolates in your candy dish at your house-

"I happen to like chocolate," Hermione interjected.

James smirked. "The exact muggle brand that Remus prefers when he can't get Honeyduke's?"

She felt her cheeks heat up and she bit into her lip, trying to hide her face with another sip of her tea.

"Remus doesn't take to just anyone," he continued. "He has a very strong moral compass. He's good at reading people and I trust his judgement. I'm just curious as to what you have in it… Why do you go out of your way for someone you've only just met."

"I would do the same for you or Lily," she reasoned.

James nodded, "I believe that. But you lived in our house, stayed with us for a couple weeks. You might do it more out of.. We'll call it obligation… You have no obligation to Remus. You certainly haven't bought special things for Sirius."

"Well it's a lot harder to keep a stock of motor oil on my end table than it is a dish of chocolates."

James laughed, nodding as his smile lit up his entire face. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and shifted in his chair, "I reckon that's true."

Hermione sighed, setting her mug on the tray and twisting her fingers together in her lap. She gnawed on her bottom lip and the inside of her cheek. James was observant, much like Harry. He paid attention to the things around him, picking up on small things that no one else would give two thoughts too. She had never thought twice about enlarging the furniture when Remus looked cramped, or buying extra chocolates, or taking the time to match his socks when she did the laundry for them. She hadn't thought that the fondness of the man that she knew as Remus Lupin in her own time would carry over, that her mind would take hold of that and cater to her friend's needs.

"Well?" James said, raising a questioning eyebrow and looking at her expectantly.

She stared at James for several breaths, trying to figure out how to word that she had known him for years and felt strangely attached to him because of it. Sought comfort in him because he had once been a comfort to her in a different time. She pushed her hair behind her ears and cleared her throat.

"Have you ever looked at someone and it just feels like you've known them your entire life? As if you've known them for years and…" she twisted her mouth to the side, huffing as she tried to find the right words. "It's like… It's like you seek comfort in them because they remind you of home, of something warm like an old jumper that's all worn in and cozy..?"

The corner of James' mouth twitched upward, "You're comparing Remus to a ruddy old jumper?"

Hermione huffed an exasperated laugh, "No! No, that's not… Not what I meant-

"I understand what you mean," he said. "I'm just taking the mickey. He reminds you of someone you were close to?"

Was Hermione close with Remus? She couldn't remember the nature of their relationship, she spent many a night grappling for the details that never surfaced, but she could feel something eating in the back of her mind that told her she had, at the very least, had a respect for Remus that she didn't have for anyone else.

"Something like that," she agreed.

James bobbed his head a few times and rubbed at his jaw, pulling at his bottom lip as he thought. His next question nearly stopped her heart.

"Is that why you can't look me in the eye?"

Her breath hitched in her throat and she sighed, looking up to his face and biting her lip again as she gave a slow nod.

"It's nothing personal," she said. "You remind me very closely of someone I am- was- very, very close to. My absolute best friend in the world, I would do anything for him. And you are a lot like him, and it's hard sometimes. I'm sorry if I've offended you or-

"You haven't offended me, Hermione." James said, leaning forward over the coffee table and grabbing her hand. He offered her a small, encouraging smile. "When you showed up it was out of nowhere and we don't know much about you, is all. I was worried I had said or done something to upset you."

Hermione looked at her hand, clasped between both of James' as he stretched over the table. She pulled her eyes up and finally looked into his eyes. Harry's eyes may be the exact shade of Lily's, the exact shape and have the exact same long lashes. But the expressiveness, the pull to tell him everything in her heart by a simple look- that was James'.

"You haven't upset me, James."

James gave her hand a small squeeze and smiled at her as he stood to his feet. "To answer your earlier question, I do believe Lily has some crushed ashwinder in her kit. I'll go get it for you on one condition."

"What's that?"

"When you've finished this new and improved hangover potion, you have to give me some."

Hermione laughed, "Yes. Of course, I will!"


Thursday, December 20, 1979

Hermione sat at the table sandwiched between Remus and Lily. It had become her usual spot at The Order Meetings. Sirius sat across from her now, instead of next to James, staring at her nearly the entire meeting. The first week, it had made her uncomfortable. His gaze was intense, questioning as he watched her every move. He seemed suspicious of her, combative with everything she said or brought to the table.

Today's meeting was no different, and when three Order members were brought in and placed in the spare room, bleeding and broken from an ambush by Death Eaters on a muggle town near Ipswich, he nearly rioted when Lily suggested Hermione take a look over them.

"She's a fair healer! Dumbledore told us that when she arrived on Halloween, Sirius! If Poppy can't-

"Poppy is an actual healer, Lily! Surely she can fix whatever is wrong with them!" Sirius grumbled.

Hermione shifted awkwardly in her seat, feeling the heat of Sirius' gaze as he vehemently argued against his friend.

"What is your problem?!" Lily said, jumping to her feet and leaning over the table to point a finger at Sirius. "Poppy needs help and Hermione can help! Why are you so against this?!"

"We don't know anything about her!" Sirius roared. "How is she a healer at twenty-two years old, and she didn't even go to proper school?! It doesn't make any damn sense!"

A loud painful sounding groan came from the next room and Poppy Pomfrey emerged, her hands red with blood and her face frantic.

"I could use help in here," she said. "I don't care who it is. I need someone in here to-

"I'm coming," Hermione said, jumping to her feet despite the look of anger flashing across Sirius' face. "I just need to get my bag-

"They need immediate attention, Miss Granger. If perhaps someone else could…"

"I'll go get it," Remus said, looking up at her from his chair. "Where is it at?"

Hermione smiled at Remus, "It's in my supply cabinet, in the spare room. Top shelf, it's been shrunken down. Black Dragonhide black bag, it has a gold clasp."

"Got it," Remus said.

"I'll go with you," Sirius said, getting up to round the table.

"I don't think you need-

Remus was cut off by Poppy's huff. "Now, if you please!"

Hermione gave another grateful smile to Remus and a curt nod to Sirius. If Sirius Black wanted to act like she was evil, fine. But she couldn't sit aside and listen to the moaning of people in the next room when she knew she could help them. She had regrown a severed spine and mended a fractured skull for Merlin's sake!

As if a switch was flipped, Hermione fell out of the comfortable skin she had been in since arriving in 1979, and slipped into the skin of the witch who had been in battle for far too long. Of the witch who had seen her friends get blown up and sliced apart by spells and curses she had never heard of.

She rushed to Poppy's side and entered the room. The coppery smell of blood was overwhelming, dizzying her in a way she hadn't felt for months. Hermione stood for a moment, blinking a few times to clear her head as she surveyed the people on the beds.

"What happened?" she asked, stepping to the bed Poppy had gone to.

The healer was on her knees, pressing a cloth to the side of Gideon Prewett's head. The cloth was rapidly turning red as he groaned in pain.

"Fucker caught my ear!" he grunted. "That severing spell they've been using!"

Hermione's face went white. A severing spell that removed his ear? It was so close to home it nearly knocked the wind from her chest. She pulled out her wand and nudged Poppy to the side.

"I got this," she said. "I know the healing spell for this particular curse."

"How-

"I've got it." Hermione gave her a pointed look and Poppy nodded, moving to the next bed and began dumping potions down the man's throat that laid there.

"Vulnera Sanentur," she whispered, gently moving the cloth from Gideon's ear and holding the mangled cartilage to the side of his head as she sang the counter-curse.

"Lucky to have you here," Gideon said, sucking in a hiss between his teeth as his ear stitched itself back to his head. "Wouldn't want to be walking around with a hole in my head."

"You've already got a hole in your head, Giddy. That's why you're so bloody stupid," Fabian said, as he choked down a potion that Poppy pressed to his lips. "That's bloody disgusting, that is!"

"Well it's better than having a broken back, Mr. Prewett. Now, shut up, and swallow this down."

Hermione bit back a smile as Poppy ordered the twin about, Fabian grumbling about how having a broken back shouldn't mean he has to drink Goblin piss.

A small whimper came from the bed opposite Gideon and Hermione looked over her shoulder to the man who was unconscious when she entered the room. She furrowed her brows together as she looked at him. Rounded face, teeth that stuck out over his bottom lip and mousy coloured hair. She knew this person, but for the life of her, she couldn't figure out why.

"Peter!" Sirius' voice filled the room and suddenly it clicked into Hermione's head.

The man she didn't know, hadn't met yet, was Peter Pettigrew. The name sprang into her memory almost instantly as she tried to place why she knew it. She knew he had been friends with James, Remus, and Sirius but there was an anger that flared inside of her that she couldn't explain, something deep and boiling that didn't make sense but begged to be addressed. She felt disgusted, like she would let the man lying there die if it was her hand that needed to save him.

"What happened?" Sirius asked, looking around the room.

Remus stepped forward, ducking low to avoid hitting his head on the door frame. He handed Hermione her bag and looked down at the bed Peter laid in with his brows knit together in concern. The frown on Remus' face made Hermione's skin crawl. Don't be concerned for him, she thought. Although, she couldn't place why she felt it.

"Went to retrieve Peter. Dumbledore wanted him back for the holidays to report what he'd seen so far. We were ambushed, they knew we were coming." Gideon said.

"Lucky it was just us. We sent Alice and Frank to the other side of the village when we got there, they at least weren't expecting us to split up," Fabian explained.

"Peter, Peter! You all right mate?" Sirius said, dropping to his knees beside his bed and giving Peter's face a gentle tap. "Wake up, mate. You all right?"

Sirius' voice was laced with fear and concern and Hermione couldn't help but feel sad for him. She was seasoned. She had seen many a friend lying in a bed, unconscious and unknowing if they would be okay. She had watched her friends and allies die in battle, saw people she cared about be pulled apart by curses that were meant to cause agony.

"He'll be okay, won't he? Poppy! Is he going to-

"Mr. Black, you need to leave," Poppy said. "Please, let us work."

"Sirius," Remus said, setting his hand on Sirius' shoulder. "Come on, we still have to discuss the-

"You better fucking fix him," Sirius said, rounding on Hermione. His jaw was clenched as he pointed to the black bag in her hands. "Whatever is in that bloody bag, it had better fucking fix him!"

He stood and stormed out of the room, shoving past Remus. Remus looked at Hermione with an apologetic sigh and followed Sirius out.

Hermione swallowed back the strange feelings of anger and moved to Peter's side. She waved her wand over him, watching as the symbols floated above him. His heart rate was okay, his breathing unobstructed, his magical core seemed okay… She bit her lip, furrowing her brows together. There were no outright signs of damage. He wasn't bleeding or missing a limb, no compound fractures through the skin…

She pulled the sheet back that was covering his legs up to his waist. No signs of damage on his legs. She pressed her hands to his torso, feeling around his internal organs, trying to see if something felt out of place. As she moved up his right side, leaned over him, she felt the dislodged ribs against her push. A small cry of pain came from Peter and a strange satisfaction took hold of Hermione.

Hermione stopped moving, her hands resting against Peter's ribs. That satisfaction had felt malicious and she buried it, she could unpack that feeling later. She opened her bag and dug around until she found the deep blue healing potion and uncorked it, dumping a bit of it into Peter's mouth.

Within minutes, a sigh of relief came from the man on the cot.

"He's fine," Hermione said. "He broke a few of his ribs. It could have been much worse, but he'll live."

"Good to hear," Gideon said. "Peter's reflexes aren't the quickest, poor bloke. Took a blast from a nasty stunner into a wall."

"You nearly lost your ear, and you're worried about a stunner to him?" Hermione asked, reaching into her bag for her stash of dittany and pulling it out.

Gideon winced as she dropped it onto his skin, "Shit, that burns! And yeah, a stunner to him is a stunner to us when we're on the field together. Besides, should I have lost my ear it'd only help my story when I pick up birds."

"Not that any birds would be interested in a one eared git who can't aim his hexes properly," Fabian called from the other bed.

"For two critically injured wizards, you sure are making light of it," Hermione pointed out, a chuckle in her voice as she began using a solution to clean Gideon's ear.

"No sense in making heavy of it," he replied. "Not gonna make anything any easier. At least if we get a laugh out of it, we'll feel a little brighter about it."

It took another half hour to finish mending and bandaging Gideon, Fabian, and Peter before Hermione cleaned herself up with a few charms and exited the room. When she entered the dining room, where the meet was taking place, the tension at the table was palpable. Lily was nowhere to be found, James was staring at Sirius with his arms folded across his chest and Sirius was panting as he leaned over the table, his face flushed with anger.

Remus was the first to see her enter the room, he stood from his seat, towering over everyone else. On very rare occasions would she ever find Remus Lupin to be intimidating, but right now, with the tension in the room and the incredulous look on every other Order member's faces, his demeanor suggested that no one would say another word.

He met Hermione's eyes and his jaw twitched with irritation as they pulled away and landed on Sirius for a brief moment before finding her again.

"How are they?" he asked, his voice low and severe.

Hermione shifted her weight nervously from foot to foot, shrinking her bag back down and slipping it into the pocket of her cloak. "They'll be fine. Gideon lost a lot of blood, almost lost an ear. I fixed it. Gave him some blood replenishers, he's sleeping now. Fabian broke his back, Poppy healed him, he's resting. He should stay out of direct fight for a fortnight, just to be certain he's healed properly. P-Peter," she found it difficult to force his name through her lips. She swallowed and pushed on, "Peter is fine. Broke a few ribs, some nasty bruising to his side from it, but he took the least damage. They'll all be fine."

"Pete's coming home with us," Sirius said. He looked at James, daring him to question his statement.

"He needs rest," Hermione said. "Let him stay here through the night, if he's up to moving tomorrow, then we can take him back to James and Lily's. Apparating with broken ribs is extremely painful and the risk of splinching is relatively high."

"How would you know?" Sirius spat.

"Because I've done it," Hermione hissed. She understood that Sirius was suspicious, but the complete mistrust when she was doing nothing but trying to help was beginning to wear her patience thin. "And I don't recommend it, unless you feel like purposely putting your friend through agony simply so you can prove whatever point it is you're trying to make."

"I'm not trying to prove a point!"

"Really? Because I just helped to save your friends, and you're still arguing whether or not I know what I'm doing. If you're that unsure of my abilities, Poppy is still here if you'd like to speak to her. Otherwise, I'd kindly appreciate it if you'd leave the question of my intelligence out of whatever it is you have against me."

"Hermione it's not that-

"Remus," Hermione said, turning her attention to him. "It's fine. Now, I'm going to go home and scrub Gideon's blood out from under my fingernails, if that's alright with you?"

Sirius shoved away from the table , shouldering past Hermione as he entered the room she had just left, making sure to sneer at her as he passed. Hermione huffed an irritated breath through her nose and fastened her cloak before giving a curt nod and walking through the house and out to the front porch.

Lily sat on the stoop, facing the road. "I wondered when you'd come out here and apologize to me. You have some nerve, Sirius Orion, to say such nasty things about- oh!"

Lily stopped herself as she turned and saw Hermione standing behind her. "Hi, Lily."

"Hey. How are the twins and Peter?" Lily asked.

"They'll all be okay. Need a few days rest, is all."

Lily nodded, "Good, good. And you? You're okay?"

"I'm fine," Hermione said. "I assume you and Sirius got into an argument?"

Lily stood up and dusted off her trousers, straightening her jumper as she walked toward Hermione. "He's an arsehole."

Hermione laughed, "I've gathered."

"He's not normally like this. I know that doesn't account for anything, but he's acting so ridiculous! And he's too stuck in his own malformed opinion to even see it!"

"Lily, it's not that big of a deal. He doesn't trust me, and that's fine. He doesn't have to like me, but I'm not going to standby and let him question my abilities or my intelligence. I can stick up for myself, but I don't want to cause a wedge between you."

"It is a big deal! We're supposed to trust our friends! We only have each other, especially Sirius! He knows how important it is to trust someone, and he's saying that I'm trusting blindly! You haven't given any of us a reason not to trust you, Hermione."

Hermione sighed, "I learned a long time ago that I can't please everyone. I know I'm not to everyone's taste, and that's okay. Please don't keep fighting with him on my account."

"He's an idiot," Lily said. "It's not my fault that apparently he needs to be reminded of that sometimes."

Hermione laughed, "I appreciate the effort, really I do. But you fighting on my behalf is only going to cause problems. He'll come around, or he won't. Either way, I'll be fine."

As she said the words, she knew she was lying. Sirius black being skeptical of her was certainly not fine. Because if what she knew she knew about Sirius Black was still true in this time, it was that if he set his mind to something, it became so.

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a/n: Hey everyone! Thank you so much for reading! I hope you liked this chapter :) As I've said a million times and will say until I die, all of my love goes to my Alpha Mayghaen17, she has helped me develop so much of this story it is unreal.

How did we feel about this chapter? Let me know in a review!

Next update will be Saturday!

xo

Mimi