Chapter 19
I'm not sure how long I was in his arms but I knew that in that moment, I never wanted him to let me go. I felt safe, understood, valued.
I hadn't noticed I was crying until I felt a tear roll down my cheek and onto Adrian's suit jacket. I slowly pulled away but Adrian held onto my face. His anguish was not only visible but somehow palpable.
"I'm sorry," He told me as he dried my tears with his thumbs while keeping my face in his hands. "I didn't want to make anything more difficult for you. I just needed you to know how I feel. I was going to explode if I kept that in any longer. That's the whole reason we were out here. Jill kept getting pulled into my brain because my emotions were so strong. She was trying to calm me down and talk me through it."
I just listened. I felt like if I tried to speak, nothing would come out right now. I wouldn't know what to say, regardless. I just focused on his eyes, and matching my breathing to his.
"Sydney, please say something." He whispered after a few seconds, my face still in his hands; eyes pleading, desperation in his voice.
Without allowing myself to think I leaned forward and kissed him. It was a whisper of a kiss but somehow so powerful. Our lips barely touched for a second but I felt my entire body get warm as if it were suddenly engulfed in flames.
I pulled away slightly and stared into his eyes. There was so much emotion between us. His lips were parted slightly and I kept getting distracted by them.
"Sydney…" Adrian said so faintly, I may have imagined it.
"We should probably get back inside." I whispered.
"I'm never going to see you again, am I?" Adrian asked, sadly.
"I don't know," was my answer.
Which was the truth. Although perhaps it'd be best if we never saw each other again, there's no guarantee as to where I may need to go for work. For all I know, the Alchemists would ask me to come back to court in 2 weeks for experiments or some other reason. I'd do my best to get out of those obligations, but there's no guarantee that I'd be able to. I'd just have to do my best to avoid Adrian. For both of our sakes.
He gently stroked my cheek. "Your aura looks so sad."
I gave him a weak smile and took a step backwards, away from his touch.
He took a deep breath then cleared his throat. "You should go in before me. I'll be out here another minute."
"Okay." We stared at each other for a few seconds before I nodded and turned around.
Before I rounded the corner, I took a glance back at Adrian. He was staring back at me with the most emotion I had ever seen in his eyes. I didn't want to say goodbye, that felt too final, too absolute. So I turned back around and walked towards the building entrance. I didn't see Adrian again for the remainder of the ceremony.
