The Raddison Hotel
Robert entered their hotel room an hour later with some Chinese take-out and a bottle of scotch. He smiled when he saw Patrick and Jessie asleep on the couch and decided not to bother them. He knew how worn out Patrick was and any time they could get Jessie to sleep was a blessing, so he grabbed his briefcase and went over to the desk to look over some paperwork. He was deep in a brief when he heard a knock at the door. He went to it and looked through the peephole, then opened the door for John. "What's up? Is something wrong? Was there another murder?"
"No, everything is fine. I just wanted to...I just wanted to talk to Patrick." He said nervously.
Robert nodded towards the couch. "He and Jessie are sleeping. Patrick's pretty upset over Susan..."
"Yeah, I know, Bailey told me what happened. I should go..."
"Stay..." They both turned towards the couch when they heard Patrick's voice. "It's okay."
John walked closer to the couch. "I didn't mean to wake you," he whispered.
Patrick gently slid out from underneath Jessie, put a pillow down where he had been sitting and eased her down on to it trying not to wake her. "Shhh.." He said as she stirred and mumbled something. He ran his fingers through her hair and whispered to her. "I'm right here...shhh." When he was sure she was comforted back to sleep he stood up, motioning John and Robert away from the couch
"I didn't mean to wake you," John repeated.
"You didn't. I heard Robert come in...I've been awake for a little while. I just didn't want to wake Jessie." Concern washed over his face. "Is something wrong, John? Did someone else..." His voice trailed off.
"No, nothing like that...I just wanted to...to talk to you."
Patrick nodded. "Okay, sure. There's a balcony outside the master bedroom...let's grab some Chinese food and the scotch and go out there. Bobby, can you listen for Jessie?"
"Sure no problem, I'm catching up on some paperwork."
Patrick grabbed the scotch and a couple of glasses and John picked up a couple of plates and some Chinese food. They went through the master bedroom and out to the balcony. Patrick reached in and turned on the light, then settled into one of the chairs across from John. It was a warm night but there was a slight breeze that kicked up every once in a while that felt good. He poured John and himself a drink.
"Anything, in particular, you want to talk about?"
"I'm sorry about what happened to your...friend."
Patrick nodded. "Thank you. She was a wonderful lady...beautiful inside and out."
Not wanting Patrick to get upset again, John changed the subject. "Jessie knew who I was. How long has she known about me?"
"Since she was six." Patrick poured himself another drink. "Carolyn was in the hospital, she had just had Travis. Jessie was sick with the flu so she couldn't visit them, so I spent my days with Carolyn and the baby and my nights with Jessie at home. She was really upset about not getting to visit. One night I brought home some pictures...so she could put them in the photo album and when we turned the pages to find an empty one...Carolyn had put in pictures she had found of you and your mother."
"Me and mom? Why?"
"I told you before when I met Carolyn I told her everything that happened...with us." Patrick smiled as he remembered his second wife. "She was hoping one day you and your mother would come around again and she'd get to meet you...and when your mother passed away she had hoped you would come to stay with us. She understood why you didn't though." He added when he saw the look of guilt on John's face.
"I'm sorry about that...I probably should have-"
"John, do not apologize for anything you did back then. Nothing was your...or your mother's fault. I was a terrible husband and an even worse father." He brushed tears from his eyes as he cleared his throat. "Anyway, getting back to the photo album...Jessie asked who you were, so I told her everything... who you were, who your mother was and why the two of you were no longer around. I don't know what I was thinking, she was only six, but I knew I couldn't lie...so everything just came out."
"How'd she take it?"
"I was terrified she'd be afraid of me...afraid that one day I'd hurt her too." He sighed and more tears fell. "Instead, she climbed up in my lap and wrapped her arms around my neck and said, I'll never forget it, she said 'Don't worry, you're not that mean Daddy anymore and one day if you say you're sorry maybe John will come back to Boston and I'll have a big brother and a little brother.' Can you believe it?" A sob escaped him and he tried to compose himself quickly.
John reached over and put his hand on Patrick's shoulder, squeezing gently. "You've been through a lot today. I'm glad you told her about me." To his surprise, John wiped at his own tears.
Patrick sat up straight and took a long drink. "I'm sorry I got so worked up, but thank you." He said looking at John's hand, still on his shoulder and smiled. "When I saw the two of you together today...it's just something I thought I would never see."
John nodded. "I'm just sorry it couldn't have been sooner...I wish I had known about her before. I missed so much."
"John, no apologizing, remember? If the past could be changed there'd be a hell of a lot more happy people...and very few not so happy ones." He laughed and poured himself another drink. "I never thought we'd be sitting here talking-" He stopped suddenly. "Did you hear that?"
"No, something wrong?" John asked cocking his head slightly trying to hear what Patrick heard.
"Jessie," Patrick said, then hurried back inside with John not too far behind.
Robert was kneeling in front of Jessie when they entered the room. He had his hand on her shoulder and was shaking her gently. "Jessie wake up, honey, you're dreaming." He kept saying it over and over in a soothing voice. He looked up noticing John and Patrick. "I can't get her to calm down. Must be a bad one."
Robert moved away so Patrick could get next to her. "Get some water, Bobby. She's burning up." Patrick said as he touched her arm. Her hair was sweat soaked and her skin was hot to the touch. She was hyperventilating and coughing and when she could get it out she called her younger brother's name. "Jessie, I'm here. I'm right here." Jessie seemed to calm a bit when she heard Patrick's voice. "I'm here, honey, it's okay."
"T.J...can't...open...the door," Jessie said in her sleep. Her breathing had slowed down but she was coughing and waving her hands around. "Too...much...smoke..."
"Jesus, what's she dreaming about," John said looking on nervously.
"Jessie, wake up, honey...it's just a dream. You're here with me...I'm right here...Dad's right here." He took the water from Robert and dipped his hand in it, then he ran his fingers down her cheeks and across her forehead to cool her off. "I'm right here." He dipped his hand in the water again and ran his hand down her arms. "Dad's right here..." He repeated putting water on her face and arms until her breathing had calmed completely and she stopped coughing. She no longer felt hot, but now tears flowed freely down her cheeks. Patrick put the glass of water down and gently sat her up to hold her. "Shhh...Jessie, it's okay." He rocked her as she continued to cry in her sleep. "It wasn't your fault, honey shhh..."
"Is she okay?" John asked shaken by the whole situation.
"She'll be fine," Robert answered. He knew Patrick was concentrating on Jessie and probably forgot John was even in the room. "She has these dreams a lot."
"What are they about?" John watched as Patrick held Jessie rocking her and whispering things he couldn't really make out.
"The car accident...the one that took Carolyn and Travis. She dreams Travis is trapped in the car...calling for her to help him but she can't get the door open." Robert shook his head. "Poor kid, she hasn't had a decent night sleep since."
Though their situations weren't the same John understood about having bad dreams about losing someone you love and feeling guilty about it. He had done so about his mother more times then he could count. He wanted to hold Jessie himself and tell her everything would be okay. She was awake now but she was crying as she tried to tell Patrick what the dream was about. Patrick was crying too as he tried to comfort her and John wanted to hug them both. He looked over at Robert, who was looking as helpless as he was. "Are you sure they're okay?"
Robert nodded and cleared his throat trying to hide the sadness in his voice. "Happens all the time. He'll stay with her like that for hours if he has to."
"I should go," John said quietly
Robert walked him to the door. "They'll be fine, don't worry. Thank you for coming and talking to Patrick. He really needed it. You and Jessie are all he has left."
"He has you," John stated matter-of-factly and smiled.
"That he does. We'll see you in the morning." Robert reached out his hand and John shook it. "Thanks again...and don't worry."
"Call me if they need anything."
"Will do. Good night John." Robert watched John walk down the hall, then sighed as he closed the door. He looked over at the couch. Patrick was still trying to comfort Jessie. He went through the master bedroom to the balcony and picked up the bottle of scotch. "We're gonna need this." He went back in to wait Patrick and Jessie out, in case they needed him when it was all over.
"Hey, you okay?" Patrick asked after Jessie had quieted completely. When she nodded against his shoulder he smiled. "That was a bad one, huh?" Jessie nodded against his shoulder again.
Robert sighed in relief when Jessie had finally calmed down. It had been two hours since John left and he had started to worry that Jessie would never snap out of it. "Can I get you something, Jess? Maybe something to drink?"
Jessie turned her head so she could see Robert. "Water, please."
Robert smiled at her. "I think I can handle that." He went to the kitchenette area and got Jessie's water. He ran a hand towel under warm water, rang it out to stop the dripping, then grabbed two empty glasses and walked back to the couch.
Jessie sat up when Robert handed her the glass of water and the damp hand towel. "Thank you." She said as she wiped her tear-streaked face with the towel, then drank the water.
Robert filled the two empty glasses with scotch and handed one to Patrick. "You okay?"
"I'm good, Bobby, thanks." He took a long drink of his scotch and leaned back into the couch cushions. After a minute or two, he sat up quickly realizing his son was not there. "Where's John?"
"He left a couple hours ago. He...uh...didn't want to...he thought it is better if he left you guys alone."
Jessie looked down at her water guiltily. "Sorry, I messed up your visit with John." She said quietly.
Robert cursed himself silently for not coming up with a different reason for John leaving, he tried to fix it. "It wasn't just that, kiddo, he had to go and get ready for Boston tomorrow. He had to pick some stuff up at the VCTF Building."
"You didn't mess anything up, Jess, and even if you did it wouldn't matter. When you need me there is nothing more important than that."
"But, Dad-"
"Stop it, Jessie, I won't have it. I won't have you feeling guilty about nothing." Patrick pulled her close to him and she put her head on his shoulder, so he kissed the top of her head. "John and I talked...we talked for a long while...I think we are gonna be okay." He finished his drink and motioned for Robert to pour him another. He yawned in between drinks.
"Pat, why don't you get off that couch and go lie down...it's been a long couple days and we'll probably be in for a few more." Robert knew better to suggest that Jessie go to bed too. The couple hours she had gotten tonight would be it for the next couple days. "Me and Jessie...we'll find ourselves something to eat and then watch some t.v." He looked over at Jessie. "Sound good?"
Jessie sat up. "Go on Dad, I'm fine. You should get some sleep." Then she looked at Robert. "You should sleep too...you and Dad will probably be busy with Agent Malone for the next couple days, so you need to be ready."
Patrick leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "You sure you're okay?" She nodded and he looked her over. Except for a little redness around her eyes she seemed to have gotten over her dream. "Okay. If you need me you come to get me." He kissed her forehead again. "I love you."
"I love you too, Dad." She smiled up at him as he got up and headed towards the bedroom. "Good night."
There's Chinese food on the table and some soda in the 'fridge. No scotch." He smiled when she tried to grin innocently. "Uh-huh, just what I thought." He stood up, leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek. "See ya in the morning, kiddo. If you need anything..."
"I will. Thanks, Robert, for everything. Good night." She watched him go into the other bedroom and close the door. Thankful to be alone for a while she sighed and leaned back into the couch. She thought about the days to come. The investigation. Susan's funeral. It was going to be hard, especially on Patrick. "This is gonna suck." She said aloud, then turned on the television and waited for morning to come.
Tbc...
