Joey reached over and turned the Dvd player off, being careful not to disturb Jessie. She had gone quiet the last half hour of the movie and he thought she had fallen asleep, so he laid there, quietly, content to just hold her. She surprised him when she turned on to her back and smiled up at him.

"I thought you fell asleep...you got quiet on me." He pushed hair from her forehead and placed a kissed in its place.

"Sorry...I was just thinking."

"Jessie..."

"I wasn't thinkin' about... the same stuff as before." She played with the collar of his shirt. "Tonight was good. Havin' you here, I kind of forgot where I was and why I was here. It was nice. Robert and John, they're...they're constant reminders that Dad's gone and it's even harder, now, to sleep...the minute I close my eyes..." She shook her head to clear it. "It's too much sometimes, ya know? I feel trapped here. I have nowhere to go...to forget...when it gets to be too much."

"I know you hate being here, but it won't be much longer. Robert said you'll probably be home next week...just hang in there a little while longer. I promise I'll come by every day to help you forget about all that other stuff." He leaned down and kissed her softly on the lips. He pulled away, lingering inches from her face. "It'll be just like this when I'm here..." He whispered. His chocolate, brown eyes looking directly into her bright, green ones. "Just like this..." He kissed her again, covering her mouth with his and pulling her into him.

"Wow..." Jessie smiled when they came up for air several minutes later. "Just like that, huh?"

"Uh-huh..." He grinned, happy with himself for being the reason for her smile.

"I'll look forward to it...but there's something I need you to do for me." She sat up and slid off the bed. "This is not a big deal, okay? Don't freak out..."

"Why am I not going to like this?" He sat up, swung his legs over and sat on the edge of the bed in front of her.

"I want you to bring me some Provigil..."

"Jessie-"

She cut him off before he could protest. "You've seen me take it before and you know it's harmless. I just need something to help keep me awake. If I have to stay here, I have to be able to get away from some of it and since I need Robert and John to...to to be here with me...I have to get rid of the nightmares."

"Jessie, you're still sick, you...you need to rest...you need to sleep, to get better You can't take drugs, in here, that are not prescribed to you. Jesus, what if it reacts with something they're giving you? They take blood, they'll find out and then what? How're you going to explain that? Jessie, listen to me, please, you can't take that stuff here...not while you're sick, please. You can ask them to give you a sedative to help you sleep-"

"I. Don't. Want. Sleep. Don't you get it? I don't want to sleep...the nightmares...I can't stop them from coming and it hurts too much. It's too much to deal with...I need a break...I need a break or I'm gonna lose it. I just need them for a little while, okay? If anyone finds out I'll deal with it. Nothing's going to happen to me." She sat down on the edge of the bed next to him. "Look, it's okay if you don't want to do it, I'll understand, I won't be mad but... but you do know, that all I have to do is pick up the phone and I can get it here? With or without you. All I ask is that you keep quiet about it, that you don't tell Robert or John."

"If it's not a big deal, why hide it from them?"

"I don't want to stay here any longer than I have to and I don't want to see any more doctors. I don't need them worrying about me...trying to fix me...I can take care of this myself. I'll just take them until I get out of here. I won't feel so trapped and I'll be able to go back to the way I was before. Joe, I need you to help me out here...even if it's just keeping quiet about it." He was looking down at the floor. She knew he was trying to decide what to do. She slid her hand into his and laced their fingers together. He looked up and she smiled. "It will be okay."

When he looked up and she smiled at him, he wanted to believe her. He wanted to believe that everything would be okay, that nothing would happen, but there was something, some part of him, telling him that something would go wrong. He was struggling, though, with the side of him that wanted to help her, that wanted to take all her pain and nightmares away and it was that side, that was breaking him down. She was right, there were over a dozen people she could call and have anything she wanted brought to her at any time and that worried him too. If he said no, what would stop her from asking for more than Provigil. Brian had told him she had problems with drugs and alcohol for years after the car accident when she was twelve. He couldn't believe some of the stories Brian told. It was hard for him to picture the condition and places Brian had found her in sometimes, it had made him sick to hear it. That was a side of Jessie he never wanted to see. It would kill him. So, he was torn. He wanted to help her, but he didn't want her to harm herself. 'It will be okay.' She had told him. He gave in, basing his decision on three things; he trusted her, there was nothing he wouldn't do for her, and more than anything, he loved her.

"Okay," He conceded. "I'll get it for you, but you have to promise me...you have to promise me, that if you feel like something's not right, you'll tell me. You have to stop taking it and tell me the minute something isn't right, okay? And, you have to get some sleep. Even if it's an hour or two...you have to stop taking it and sleep, nightmares or not..."

"I will...don't worry, everything will be okay." She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Thank you."

Joey nodded. It didn't go unnoticed that she didn't promise him anything, but he knew she would never make a promise she couldn't keep. He also knew that she would try and do as he asked. All he could do was hope that she knew what she was doing and that she would be alright. "So, where am I getting it from?"

"I have some at home...in my nightstand...in the bottom drawer there's a box with pictures in it...there should be a plastic bag at the bottom...it should have about twelve pills in it...that should be good enough until I'm discharged. If I wind up staying longer Jimmy C could hook me up with some more."

"Jimmy C from Ray's? You get pills from him?"

"Joey, it's not a big deal, okay, he's not my drug dealer or anything. He got the Provigil for me after he heard about my sleeping habits, that's it...that's all I get from him, okay?"

"I believe you, just don't go to him anymore, okay? I don't trust him...if there's anything you need, I'll take care of it."

"Anything?" She grinned, devilishly. She slipped her hand from his and placed it on his thigh. Moving her hand up slowly, her eyes never left his. She made her way up to the top of his jeans and lingered there, playing with the button. Smiling, when she heard him groan, and not wanting to torture him because she knew he would never allow anything to happen, she moved her hand to his stomach and then to his chest. Her fingers moved across his chest, up and down his shoulders and then back again. "I need you." Her hand stopped in the middle of his chest, she balled his shirt up in her fist and pulled his mouth to hers.

All worked up again, he kissed her hungrily, leaning forward so she fell back on to the bed. He let his hands wander over her, over her clothes, telling himself to stay in control, forbidding himself to go any further. 'Christ, I'm gonna need a cold shower when I leave here.' He said to himself. He pulled away from her slowly, dragging her bottom lip with him as he went. "We definitely can't keep this up." He sat up, blowing out a breath as he tried to control his breathing, and smiled at her. "My self-control can only take so much."

She sat up and put her arm around him. "Poor baby." She laughed as she kissed his cheek and rubbed his back.

"Thanks for your sympathy..."

"Hey, I don't remember stopping you, buddy, you did that all on your own."

"Don't remind me. Robert and John have been gone a long time..." He said, needing to change the subject.

"Yeah, they either left the hospital, to get some real food, or they're not sure what we're doing and they're nervous about coming back up." She elbowed him playfully in the side. "See, we had plenty of time...we could've had fun... at least twice."

"At least twice, what? " Robert asked as he and John walked in at the end of Jessie's sentence.

Joey turned red and looked away nervously.

Jessie grinned, trying hard not to burst out laughing. "We watched Stand By Me and he didn't remember watching it with me before. I told him we've seen it together at least twice." She explained.

"Oh. How was dinner?" Robert asked.

"It was good. It was a nice change from the garbage they serve here."

"I'm with you, Jess... and let me tell ya, the food in the cafeteria isn't much better. I can't believe doctors eat that stuff." John added.

"So you guys left? Where'd you end up eating?"

"A Deli around the corner...they make good sandwiches and even better coffee. Nice waitresses too, right John? Our waitress was very fond of him." Robert told them happily. "I think she even slipped him her number."

"John, you dog." Jessie laughed.

"She didn't give me her number." John protested. "Joey, help me out here..."

"Welcome to my world, John." Joey laughed. They all laughed with him.

After the laughter settled down, Joey pointed over to the tray-tables. "Dinner filled us up, so we left the cheesecake for you guys."

"Nice. This will go well with coffee later." Robert walked over to the tray-table and eyed the cheesecake. "Strawberries on top...sweet."

"Ya might want to move yours before he starts drooling, John," Jessie suggested, bringing on another bout of laughter.

Still laughing, Joey slid off the bed and stood in front of Jessie. "I gotta go, hon...I have some running around I need to do for Brian before I meet up with him later."

"Okay." She pulled him into a hug. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"I love you." He whispered as he slowly slipped from her arms.

"I love you too...but why are we whispering?"

"Oh." He cleared his throat and spoke normally. "Sorry." He gave her a quick, soft kiss on the lips. "I'll see you tomorrow." He turned towards John and Robert. "I'll see you guys sometime tomorrow, I guess. Have a good night."

"You too, buddy. See you tomorrow." Robert clapped him on the back as he walked passed.

"Good night, Joey." John smiled. "Thanks for the cheesecake."

"Anytime, John. Sleep well, Jess... I'll call you in the morning." Joey left. He gave everyone a little wave before he stepped away from their view.

Robert sat on the edge of the bed next to Jessie. "You okay?"

"I'm fine."

"You look tired...you're not used to having visitors...it's been a long day."

She nodded. "Maybe, but I'm not that tired. Wanna watch a movie?" She asked looking back and forth between Robert and John. Both said okay. "Cool. I picked the last one, so you guys decide. I need to use the bathroom, get it set up, I'll be right back."

John moved the two chairs from the window to the side of the bed while Robert went through the bag of movies.

"I think seeing Joey did her some good, she looks better...happier, ya know, not so bummed out," Robert said as he went through the bag.

"Yeah, I see it too. She needs to see more than our mugs every day, I guess. I'm glad Brian's gonna come to hang out with her tomorrow...that should be a big help too."

Robert's cell rang and he handed John three movies. "Here, pick one." He told him before pulling his phone out of his pocket and answering it. "Hello? Oh, hey, Brian...what's up?"

John was still trying to decide on a movie when Jessie came out of the bathroom. She sat down on the bed and watched as he shuffled the movies in his hand. "The Natural, A Perfect World, and Frailty...let me guess...Robert picked those?"

John nodded. "Now I have to pick one. I've seen The Natural...great movie, Redford is amazing. I think I've seen A Perfect World...it looks familiar and anything with Clint Eastwood is worth watching...but I've never seen Frailty..."

"It's a good movie, kind of dark, but a really good movie...definitely in my top ten."

"Frailty it is then." John handed it to her.

Jessie set it up and they waited for Robert to finish his call before starting it.

"He picked Frailty," Jessie said as Robert closed his phone an put it back in his pocket.

"Good choice, great movie, but uh...I'm gonna have to go. Brian's having some trouble and he needs me to be the middle man and help him out. It will probably take all night so I won't be back, here, tonight...but I'll be back in the morning, okay? I'll bring breakfast...whatever you want."

"Robert, chill out, it's okay, it's no big deal. I think I'll live. Go do whatever it is you need to do and I'll see you in the morning, it's okay, really. John's here, I'll be fine."

"We'll be okay, Robert, don't worry," John reassured him.

Robert stood in front of Jessie, leaned forward and kissed the top of her head. "Try to get some sleep tonight, okay? I love you."

"I love you too." She said hugging him. She held him a little tighter than she meant to. Robert had been with her almost every minute of her hospital stay and she wasn't as sure, as she thought she was, about him not being with her overnight.

"Are you sure, you're okay?" Robert sensed her discomfort.

Jessie pulled away from him and smiled, although weakly, at him. "I'm sure. It's okay, go"

"Okay." Robert conceded, but was a little reluctant to go. "I'll call you later, after Brian and I get everything settled, to see how you guys are doing. And, I'll call in the morning to take a breakfast order. I should be back here by nine."

"Well, let's get the movie started," John said after Robert left.

"Yeah, okay," Jessie said trying to keep the sadness out of her voice. "Can you get the lights? The screen picks up a lot of glare."

"Sure." John switched the lights off and then settled into the chair, closest to Jessie's bed.

Jessie started the movie and laid back into her pillows. After several moments of wrestling with her thoughts, she gave in and said them aloud. "John uh...how's your leg?"

Hearing the nervousness in her voice, he turned to look at her. "It's okay. It's a little stiff, but I'm okay." He turned completely in the chair to face her. "Are you okay?"

She looked down at her hands, which were absently plucking at the fibers of her blanket. "I was just thinking...if your leg hurt...you should...if you needed to be more comfortable...well there's...there's plenty of room up here...enough that I wouldn't be too close, so I ...so I wouldn't hurt you...I just thought maybe you could..."

John reached over and covered her hands with one of his. "Jessie, do you want me to lay with you?"

Jessie nodded, still not looking at him.

He got up from the chair, walked around to the other side of the bed, took his shoes off and slid on to the bed, next to her. Sitting up and leaning back against the pillows, he put his hand on her shoulders and guided her back to lean into him. Her head rested in the hollow of his shoulder and he wrapped his arms around her. He kissed the side of her head. "Better."

She nodded against him. "Thank you."

He smiled. He had missed being close to her and it was a comfort to them both.


Tbc...