A/N: HELLO EVERYONE! Sorry I've been gone so long, I just had to catch up on everything. I might not update as frequently as I like in the next couple weeks with finals quickly approaching. I also put a warning that I'd be on temporary leave in my profile…it's gone now, but I hope you're not mad because I decided to give you this new chapter of We Are The Penguins…Yaaaaay! Please enjoy while I go study. If you're confused, you can refer to the previous chapter.

"No…"

The voice sounded so far away, but Private could have sworn he heard it. It wasn't time to wake up yet…

"No…"

He felt heavier, being taken back down to earth from the land of dreams. He wasn't supposed to go to school for another couple of hours or something like that…

"NOOOO!"

"What?" Private's eyes snapped open. He heard a whimpering noise, it sounded like a wounded animal.

"NO! LEAVE HIM! NO! STOP!"

Locating the source of the noise, Private jumped out of bed and raced to Kowalski's.

"Wake up. Kowalski, wake up!"

"I WON'T! I WILL NOT LET IT HAPPEN!"

"Then don't, wake up and end the nightmare." Private said. "Skipper, Rico!" he called. He backed away from Kowalski's thrashing limbs.

The door burst open and the other two ran in.

"AAAAAHHH!"

"Kowalski, wake up!" Private yelled. "I don't know what's going on. He just started yelling."

"Kowalski!" Skipper said. "Kowalski, can you hear me?"

"I can't…it hurts…I can't do it…I failed…I couldn't…"

Skipper approached Kowalski as soon as the thrashing died down.

"Kowalski, what's going on? Wake up, man!"

"Help…me…there is no help…I can't…I-"

SLAP!

"Skipper!" Private gasped.

Kowalski bolted up and swung his arms wildly around, one of them making contact with Skipper's side.

"Ow." Skipper said.

"What the heck are you doing?" Kowalski muttered, realizing that he was in his bed.

Rico switched the lights on.

"You were screaming." Skipper said. "It's five in the morning."

"And did I say anything?"

"Kind of."

"I have to use the restroom." Kowalski mumbled, getting up.

"Is it me or is he paler than normal?" Skipper asked.

"I noticed that too." Private said. "Maybe he's sick."

Skipper didn't respond. They were still staring at the doorway when Kowalski came back.

"Hi." Kowalski said. "What's up?"

"Seriously?" Skipper said. "You just screamed your head off then acted like it was nothing."

"It was just a bad dream." Kowalski said. "I had a dream that someone was smashing all my inventions and then smacking me with broken stuff." He said.

"Yeah, what about the part where you said 'leave him'? What was that?" Private said. He could tell that the other two shared his doubt.

"Apparently my invention was a male." Kowalski said.

"I honestly don't believe that." Skipper said. "I'll let you off the hook for now because it's so early and-"

There was a loud knock at the door.

Skipper went to check. "Boys, I think we disturbed the dragon." He said.

The other three came to the door as Skipper opened it. Private yelped.

Alice was livid. Her hair was a mess and she was breathing heavily. Private could have sworn he saw steam coming out of her nostrils.

"What on Earth is going on here?" She snarled.

"Oh you know plate tectonics, life, and stuff…" Kowalski said.

Alice shot him a death glare. "What was with the racket? And do any of you care to explain why I got a call from Julien saying that someone blew up his chair?"

"It's my fault ma'am." Kowalski said, changing his humorous voice to a deep calm one. "I had awoken my roommates with a fair bit of noise. I do not mean to awaken you. As for Julien, I cannot say. Perhaps he had too many frivolous events and his chair just…gave away."

Alice didn't notice Rico and Skipper's grins or Private's shocked expression.

She stammered for a moment, trying to figure out what to say.

"We are not to blame as we were playing a delightful game of Monopoly before retiring to bed." He pointed to the sprawled out game on the table. "As for the dream, it was merely an unconscious stream of thought; I will attempt to calm my inner mind." He finished with a whisper.

"I…just don't let it happen again! I already had to tell you off for yelling on the third floor so just don't do it again!" She said. She huffed back down the hall.

Kowalski closed the door and turned.

Rico and Skipper laughed.

"H-how did you do that?" Private asked. "She looked like she was about to destroy us!"

Kowalski shrugged and returned to his room.

"Never underestimate the Kowalski charm." Skipper said. "I have no idea how he does it, but a few girls have a crush on him."

"Seriously, what would have happened if Kowalski hadn't been there?"

"Alice would have ranted at us until school started, then she'd furiously call our parents." Skipper said. "I've been here longer than Kowalski so I know how Alice is."

"Can he get her to stop calling me Alvin?"

"Maybe." Skipper chuckled. "Or you can talk in a high pitched squeaky voice around her and I'll yell 'Alvin', it'll drive her crazy."

"But we can get in trouble!"

"No, it's not our fault she refuses to call you by your name. So if she's going to call you that, why not have fun with it?"

"Alright, as long as my mum isn't called."

"I can't guarantee that."

"Oddly, I'm okay with that."

Skipper grinned. "And while we're at it, we can drive Julien crazy."

"Yeah." Rico agreed.

"Okay."

"Hey Kowalski, you okay with driving Julien crazy?" Skipper called.

"Sure, as long as we don't get into trouble." Kowalski said.

"You can always turn on the Kowalski charm." Skipper said.

"The what?"

"The Kowalski charm, that's what we call it when you persuade someone to do something."

"Persuasive? Me? You must be confusing me with someone else."

"And he denies it." Skipper said. "Anyway, he's in. As long as Julien drives us crazy, we'll drive him crazy. Step one, take Mort's key."

"What?" Private said.

Skipper pulled a key out of his pocket.

"But-"

"I said I returned Julien's, but I also took Mort's. I want to drive Julien crazy by letting Mort drive him crazy."

Private shook his head.

"Step two…uh…I actually don't know." Skipper scratched his head. "Hey Kowalski, what's step two?"

Kowalski came out with his backpack on. "How about racing him down and taking the last chocolate chip pancakes?"

"Tempting, but we need to let him enjoy that before he gets upset again. Give me more options."

"Taking key parts of his noisemaking machines away."

"Hey, that could work. Private, I'll need you to go down to breakfast, see if all four of them are gone. And save us some pancakes."

"Alright, but won't he be suspicious if you three are gone?" Private said. "He already probably blames Rico for the chair."

"Right, which is why Rico will go with you. Tell us if anyone is headed up and we'll be careful." Skipper said. "Kowalski will take the machine parts and I'll stand guard."

"Aye, Skipper!" Private said. "Can I have your phone number?"

The four of them exchanged numbers and grinned.

"Operation Drive Julien crazy is a go."

Rico and Private nodded and headed out.

"Now we wait for their signal that all is clear." Skipper said.

"Alright."

Rico and Private stepped off into the lobby and headed towards the line. Heads turned to them and quickly looked down when Rico looked at them.

"Gosh, we must look great for them to be jealous." Private said.

Rico laughed, startling a few people nearby. He looked around and nudged Private.

"What? Oh." He saw Maurice and Julien.

Rico texted this to Skipper.

Skipper responded by telling them to look for Mort and Fred.

Private scanned the line as they got closer, but he didn't see them.

"I told you not to do that." A voice said behind them.

"But it was so yummy!"

Private looked back to see Eggy shaking his head and Mort looking upset about something.

Private let Skipper know that Mort was there.

"What happened?" Private asked.

"Genius here decided to eat a crayon." Eggy responded. "And then he threw up in the pool. Alice is not going to be happy."

"Mort, why would you do that?" Private said.

"I don't know!" Mort wailed.

"Mort, what are you doing?" Julien asked. "Hey pal, what did you do to him?" He poked Rico in the chest.

Rico simply stared.

"I asked what you did to him; and why did you explode my chair to tiny bits?"

"Honestly Julien, we were playing Monopoly." Private said. An idea struck him. "Now why don't you erm, go back to your breakfast." He smiled.

"Why are you talking all creepy?" Julien asked. "Never mind, hurry up Mort or we will leave without you."

Private's face was pink.

"I thought I could do that thing Kowalski does." He mumbled.

Rico laughed so hard, people actually scooted away.

"No one can talk their way out of situations like Kowalski." Kenny said. Private hadn't seen him until now. "Hey Andre, when did you get that haircut?"

"Last night." Private said. "Rico did it for me. And do you mind calling me Private?"

"Cool." Kenny said. "Private? Er, okay. Is there a reason why?"

"Yes."

"...Uh…are you going to tell me?"

"Nope."

"Well okay then." Kenny said. "I'll accept that."

"You'd really accept something without explanation?"

"I'm just assuming it's a form of rebellion against your mother."

"Something like that."

"Hey Rico, I'm sorry about-"

Rico waved him off. "Fine." He said.

"Do you think you can do my hair too?" Eggy asked. "My sister keeps saying I look like a girl."

Rico nodded.

"Have any of you seen Fred?" Private asked.

"Fred went to school early." Mort said. "He had a project thingy."

"Oh." Private said.

Rico notified Skipper when the boys weren't paying attention.

"Perfect." Skipper said to Kowalski.

Kowalski grinned.

Skipper opened the door and let Kowalski into the room.

Skipper sat down next to the door and pretended to read. His excuse would be that he was waiting for Kowalski who was taking a while.

Kowalski scoped out the room to make sure no one was there. Then he found the main source of noise. It was a giant stereo and a CD player plugged up to an amplifier.

He pulled out a screwdriver and approached the machines. He took apart some compartments and sighed.

"Okay, it's safe to say that I have no idea what any of these do." He said to himself.

He pulled out some of the wires in all three machines and then left a note that Skipper crafted. He decided to go further and went into Julien's room. He hacked the computer and changed the screen to view a terrifying image and wrote a warning on that too.

He took Julien's iPod as well.

A vibration in his pocket startled him.

"Hello?" he said once he picked it up.

"Warning, Mort's coming up to look for his key." Private said. "He just went into the elevator. Rico's telling Skipper now. Get out of there."

Kowalski left Julien's computer open and prepared to leave, but tripped on the way out and spilled the wires.

He heard an urgent knock on the door.

"I'm coming." He said. Suddenly, he froze; the distant sound of a child singing out of tune was heard.

He gathered the wires and shoved them in his backpack. He was about to open the door when he heard Skipper.

"Oh hello Mort." Skipper greeted loudly.

"Hello, I forgotted my key."

"I think I saw it."

"Really?" Mort asked.

"Yes, you dropped it. I saw it outside, let's look outside that window."

"Oh, okay."

He waited until he heard receding footsteps before opening the door. Skipper was standing behind Mort and pointing outside. Mort had his face to the glass and was looking around. Kowalski took a deep breath, holding the door at its widest before running out. He managed to zip around the corner before the door closed.

"What was that?" Mort said, looking around.

"Oh, it was probably one of the girls going down to breakfast." Skipper said, seeing Kowalski's short message. "Anyway, I was wrong. It must have been a wrapper I saw on the ground."

"Oh, okay." Mort said. "Maurice gived me his key so I can look. Want to help me?"

"I would love to, but I have to go eat. If I don't get breakfast I could faint." Skipper said.

Mort shrugged and entered his room.

Skipper caught up with Kowalski near the elevators. The tall boy was panting and clutching his side.

"Good work." Skipper said.

"Yeah." Kowalski replied.

"What are you two doing?"

The boys looked up to find Marlene there.

"Classified, doll face." Skipper said.

Marlene raised an eyebrow. "And who told you to call me that?"

"The same person who told you to question us."

"Two questions. They were two questions by me and I want you to answer at least one of them."

"Okay, I told myself to call you doll face. I mean your face looks so great it should be on a doll." Skipper said.

Marlene rolled her eyes. "Aren't you two going to be late for the pancakes?" she asked.

"Yes, we are." Skipper said.

"Kowalski, what have you been doing?"

"Breathing." Kowalski said.

Marlene shook her head and pushed a button for the elevator. "So I take it you're not going to tell me what you were doing."

"Simple, I pretended to leave and Kowalski ran after me." Skipper said.

"How come I have the feeling that's not the truth?" Marlene asked as they got on the elevator.

"Because you never believe anything I say."

"That's so not true." Marlene said. "I totally believe you!"

"Okay, then believe me when I say you don't want to know."

"Now I really want to know."

"Well, stop then."

"What aren't you telling me?"

"You smell like oranges."

"Huh?"

"I like oranges."

Marlene blushed. "Gee, thanks."

"Oh, and watch out for the guy who has an obsession with you." Skipper added.

"Right, he can't leave me alone in the chat room either."

"Tell me if you want me to threaten him. I already threatened Ju- nothing." He looked away.

Marlene looked suspicious.

"He means yesterday." Kowalski said. "When Julien didn't stop bugging Rico."

"Oh, how is he?" She asked, forgetting she was suspicious. "I hate the fact that they were being mean to him. Do you know who that Petey kid is? He stuck up for Rico."

"No, but we all have usernames so it might be a random name." Kowalski said.

"YES!" Skipper said once they arrived. "I'm hungry!"

"Hang on, wasn't I asking him about something else?" Marlene asked as Skipper joined the line.

"I don't recall." Kowalski said. "However, we have missed out on pancakes of the chocolate chip variety."

"That's alright, I'll settle for waffles." Marlene said. "And you do realize I'm not going to let you two off. I won't tell anybody, but I will find out." She said, giving them stern looks.

"Sure you will." Skipper said. He found Private and Rico and smiled to indicate the mission was a success.

"How do you do it?" Marlene asked.

"Do what?"

"You manage to infuriate me, yet I want to laugh."

Skipper shrugged and returned to find himself at the front of the line. Once they got their food, Skipper and Kowalski joined Private, Rico, and Kenny's table. Marlene had gone to sit with some friends.

"Oh boy, I'm stuffed." Kowalski said.

Skipper gave him a look. "A small bowl of fruit? Are you sure that'll satisfy you until lunch time?"

"Yes." Kowalski said blankly. "Kenny, finish your apple."

"But I'm done." Kenny said. "I ate two waffles and I'm finished."

"And you took one bite of your apple. I don't want you to leave until it's left with its core."

Kenny was about to respond, but Kowalski gave him a look.

"Well, Rico and I will head out now." Skipper said. "You coming, Private?"

"Yeah." Private said. "See you soon."

"Bye." Kenny said.

"You!"

Private looked around to find Alice marching towards him.

"Yes?" Private squeaked.

"Tell me the real reason that Julien's chair broke and how did his key suddenly appear?" Alice asked. "Why is Mort now looking for his? I know you and your friends have something to do with this, Alvin, and I will find out."

"But Alice-"

"Do you know who's to blame?"

"N-no."

"Was it Skipper? Or Rico? Tell me now, Alvin."

"It was Theodore."

"Who?"

Skipper inhaled deeply. "ALVIIIIIIIIIIIIN!" He yelled.

"Dave needs me, gotta go!" Private said, zipping out with Skipper and Rico.

The three of them laughed as they walked down the street.

"Nice going." Skipper said. "Next time, Kowalski can be Simon and Rico will be Theodore."

"And then technically, I told the truth." Private said. "Theodore, aka Rico, did it."

Kowalski and Kenny caught up to them a few minutes later.

"What did you three do?" Kowalski asked.

"Alice looked like she wanted to strangle someone." Kenny said.

"We played Monopoly with Alvin." Skipper responded.

Kowalski snickered, but Kenny didn't get it.

"I'm Andre, not Alvin." Private said.

"Oh!" Kenny said, and then he burst out laughing. "That's why Skipper yelled."

"We decided to play along when she calls him Alvin. I have a pretty loud voice so I'm Dave." Skipper said. "Rico's Theodore and Kowalski's Simon."

"No." Kowalski said curtly.

"Whoa, no need to freeze us out, what happened?"

"I. Hate. Simon." He said with clenched teeth.

"What?!" Private said. "How can you hate a little furry chipmunk?"

"Not that Simon." Kowalski snapped.

"Calm down and I'll explain." Skipper said. "Simon's this kid from another school. Supposedly he's talented and brilliant. He also irks Kowalski."

"He is NOT smart. I will beat him in EVERYTHING and when the time comes I shall win the local science fair and the academic decathlon and I WILL BEAT HIM IN A STINKIN' CHESS GAME!" Kowalski was breathing heavily now. "I am the best. He thinks he's so great with his perfect teeth and perfect life and perfect name and perfect- I WILL DESTROY-"

"KOWALSKI!" Kenny shouted.

Kowalski closed his mouth and turned pink.

"Simon Simone, yes it's odd that his last name is almost his first name." Skipper said. "But he's pretty well liked. I personally think he's an android."

"Stupid Simon, he thinks he's so smart…" Kowalski grumbled. "I'll show him…stupid pretty boy…I will show him…going down…so far down it's not even funny…"

Kenny shook his head when Private opened his mouth to respond.

The younger boys headed to their area of the school while the older boys headed to the high school.

"So are you going to tell the teachers to call you Private?" Kenny asked.

"Yup, do they accept name changes?"

"Our Math and History teachers will ask but most likely won't mind, Science might be hard to convince, PE teacher calls you by last name anyway, study skills supervisors don't care as long as they can help you, and I have no idea about your English teacher."

"What about Allie and Ramona and…the others."

"Classmates don't care what you call yourself. Ramona will probably laugh at it for a minute before taking you seriously and I don't know Allie that much. But if you're trying to keep a cover, than Andre's good."

"No, I want to completely change from a shy kid into an independent boy."

"Alright then, but some people will call you Andre."

"That's fine."