The one part of being a professional hockey player Jane never could get used to, was all the travelling. Constantly being on a bus, plane, at the airport, it was both boring and exhausting. She knew she shouldn't complain, the women had fewer games and trips during a season than the men's teams. Still she stared out at the gray skies and wished they were going home instead of to a new city, especially when that city was Denver. A movement in the corner of her eye made her turn around.
Maura sat down next to her. "You look bored" the doctor smiled.
Jane sighed and leaned back in her seat. "Yeah, waiting isn't really my strong suit, at least not at airports."
"That I have figured out already."
Jane couldn't help but chuckle from the expression on Maura's face; it seemed like she was about to roll her eyes.
"If you don't mind me asking, Jane, what's the story behind your number?" Maura turned towards Jane and tilted her head. "I was thinking about it the other day, and you don't strike me as the kind of person who randomly chooses a jersey number, so why 29?"
It was a common question, one she had answered many times before, but as Jane looked into the doctor's eyes she knew the story would be tougher to tell this time. "When I was in high school, a new kid moved to town in my second year. He was from a small town in Minnesota, quiet and shy, didn't seem like he was comfortable in classes either. Some bullies were on his back right away, and no one managed to stop them. When he found out I played hockey, he started coming to games and practices. We talked a bit and he said he had always dreamed of playing hockey, but his mother couldn't afford the equipment or the classes.
When winter came, I took him down to Boston Common and the Frog Pond, rented some skates and tried to teach him a few things. After new year's the bullies learned about his birthday, February 29th and all hell broke loose. They used it for what it was worth to them, said he didn't exist three out of four years, just like the date. I told him I liked his birthday, it was unique and I said I would change my number to 29 because of that. And I did."
Jane stopped to take in a deep breath to calm herself down. She always struggled with this part of the story. Always.
"He never got to see my new jersey. One day he didn't show up for school. No one knew where he was. At the end of the day, the police were involved, looking for him." She had to stop to fight her emotions. She always choked up at this point in the story. "They found him three days later" she whispered. "In the river. No note, no witnesses, we never found out if it was an accident or not." She was staring at the floor when she stopped talking, and barely noticed the comforting hand on her shoulder.
"I'm sorry to hear that, Jane" Maura whispered. "But you're really being respectful and thoughtful by wearing his number."
"I can't part with that number now. No way."
"Of course not. And you shouldn't either. Does his mother know?"
Jane looked up and nodded. "Yeah. I told her at the funeral, even though she didn't know who I was. And when I got drafted I wrote her a letter. She says she watches every game she can."
Maura's hand slowly slid down Jane's arm, and the fingers curled around her forearm. "He would be proud of you. Just like I'm sure his mother is."
Jane looked at the hand that was softly squeezing her arm. "Thanks" she mumbled and breathed out. She didn't dare to move and they both sat in silence for several minutes. Jane looked at the doctor when she needed to end the silence. "What number would you have if you played?"
The question seemed to surprise Maura. "Me? Oh… I am not sure." She stared out into thin air. "I can't even see myself playing let alone picking a number."
"No numbers that have a special meaning to you?" Jane smiled and noticed the hand on her arm was still there.
"Not that I can think of. How do players choose their numbers? Is it usually a special number?"
"Sometimes" Jane said and nodded. "But it can be anything from a birthday to their draft pick."
Maura finally removed her hand from Jane's arm, but without paying much attention to it. "So what would your number be if you went by your draft pick?"
Jane laughed. "Oh, I could never wear my draft pick as a number. I was picked as number 4."
"And what's wrong with number 4?" Maura asked completely clueless.
"I'm from Boston. Number 4 in hockey is sacred. Bobby Orr was number 4. He's pretty much the icon of the Boston Bruins."
Maura lit up like she finally understood what Jane was talking about. "Oh, is the statue outside their arena a portrait of him?"
"Yeah" Jane nodded. "The famous goal that won them the Stanley Cup in 1970. That's him."
"You do know your hockey history it seems. Do you want to tell me more about him?"
Jane wasn't sure if she should take it as a joke or not. "You want to listen to boring hockey history?" she repeated just to be sure.
"Yes, and I don't think it will be boring listening to you."
"Alright" Jane smiled. "But this could take a while."
Maura just held out her hands. "I don't have anywhere else to be."
"Hey guys, just a few words before we go out." Heather stood up and walked to the middle of the room, drawing the attention from everyone. "As you know, it's Rizzoli's first time back here in Denver. And I know most of you know what that's like; for the player, both teams and not to mention the fans. I know I don't have to ask you to give your best, because you do every day. But this is a really special game for Rizzoli, and damn it, we're the Daredevils! Let's go out there and be those devils!" A few cheers erupted while Heather continue to do her duty as captain. "When we go out there now, we're gonna give our best. In every aspect. Shoot, hit, do whatever it takes to win this one! Do your job, and focus on your shift. Win the battles, so we can win the war. Let's show how proud and lucky we are to have Rizzoli on our team!"
Jane remained silent as she watched the others fire each other up. She was both uncomfortable and humble, not good at dealing with compliments, but still happy for it. They all got up on their feet and Louisa led the way out of the dressing room and to the ice. Jane got a lot of pats on the back and it made her feel a bit better, knowing that she would have the support of her team if anything happened during the game. And Jane was sure she would need it.
She didn't hear much as they skated out on the ice for warmups, but Jane prepared herself for the worst anyway. It was strange being back in Denver, but it was also a confirmation that she had made the right choice by leaving. She kept her eyes on their half of the ice, not once glancing over to her former teammates. The music was loud enough to drown out the audience, and it made her nervous. She knew the speaker would go through the roster soon, she knew her name would be read out loud, but it still caught her by surprise when the music stopped and that familiar voice filled the arena. Heather caught up with her behind the goal and patted her on her back. "How's it going?"
Jane rolled her eyes and turned to Heather as they kept skating. "It's weird. And terrifying" she admitted.
"I know... I was a nervous wreck the first time I went back to Seattle. I was so afraid of messing up, and making a fool out of myself."
"Exactly! I feel like I have to be brilliant today or they'll just laugh at me, thinking it was for the best that I left."
Heather slowed down and stopped, forcing Jane to do a 360 to get back to her side. "I know this is difficult, but you have to distance yourself from them. Don't let them get inside your head. You know how the fans are; they either love or hate their former players, and if they decide to hate them, it's bad. Just don't listen to them."
Jane laughed softly and shook her head. "It's not the fans I'm worried about…"
At the same moment, the speaker raised his voice. "And welcome back, no 29, Jane Rizzoli!"
Jane froze and it seemed like minutes passed before she heard applause combined with some more negative sounds and words. Heather looked to the other side of the ice, and Jane followed her gaze. A few players tapped their sticks on the ice, but most of them just stared at her. The coaching staff on the bench however was clapping and smiling. Heather turned back to Jane with a confused look on her face.
"Yeah…" Jane sighed. "It's a long story and too complicated, but it's probably gonna be a dirty game tonight…"
Jane faked a smile when coach Landers came over to her right before the game started. She faked a smile to everyone except Heather and Maura. Jane kept her eyes on her gloves as the game started; she was more nervous than she thought, and she wished she had taken Danielle up on her offer to come along. Seeing her old teammates was strange. It felt like years, but it had only been a few months since she left.
The first line cleared the puck and headed towards the benches to change, and Jane stood up, knowing it was her turn. She took a deep breath, and right before she jumped on the ice, she glanced in Maura's direction. The doctor smiled at her with a small nod, and Jane hopped over the board. Her focus was quickly back on the game when Denver changed as well. Jane knew it was the second line coming on, she knew Sarah would be the left wing on that line. It didn't take long before Sarah was headed towards Jane, and Jane prepared herself for whatever Sarah might say. But not a word was said, and Sarah just scowled as she skated by. Jane took advantage of the silent treatment and did her job instead. Even if the hits were a bit harder than usual, nothing special happened and Jane let out a breath of relief when she returned to the bench.
To Jane's surprise, the silent treatment continued all through the first period. Neither team managed to score, despite Denver's 15 shots on goal. Louisa was a wall for the Devils, and kept them in the game and frustrated the Grizzlies at the same time. The second period started just how the first ended, with an offensive Denver dominating the play. On her first shift, Jane had to go straight into defensive position and it was exhausting. But her line managed to keep Denver away from the goal, and she got a well-earned pat on the back when she returned to the bench.
After several minutes of pure Denver domination, everyone was surprised when Boston suddenly scored. No one really understood how a (lousy) shot from the blue line made it past the goalie, even Heather who took the shot was a bit confused. Jane was just as surprised as the rest when she saw the red lamp light up behind the goal, and she burst out into a loud cheer along with the rest of the team. She had decided to play it cool if they were to score against Denver, or even win. But all the excitement around her caught her by surprise and she got up and hugged the girls next to her. As her eyes went back to the ice, she made eye contact with Sarah and it killed the mood instantly. Jane quickly lowered her arms and sat back down, and for a brief moment she hated herself for being so weak and scared when it came to Sarah.
The goal didn't change much in the game. Denver kept pressing on and Boston fought to keep them away. The next time Jane and Sarah were both on the ice, Sarah put an end to the silent treatment she had given Jane. "You should be glad you didn't score that one…"
Jane ignored her and kept focusing on the game. Every time Sarah got possession of the puck, it was Jane's job to get in her way. And when she got the opportunity to lay a big hit on Sarah, Jane didn't hesitate. Sarah didn't see the hit coming until it was too late, and she went tumbling down to the ice. Jane ignored the words from Sarah's mouth and chased after the puck instead. She managed to get it out of their zone so they could change again.
"How's it going?" Heather asked as Jane slumped down on the bench next to her.
"Let's just say I'm glad you scored and not me" Jane replied and rolled her eyes.
Jane didn't really know what happened after she took the ice for her next shift. One second she was skating to get into position, the next she was flat on her back on the ice and felt like she had been run over by a truck. The crowd cheered and then she saw Heather skating by in full speed, dropping her gloves and basically attacking Denver's no 14. Jane sat up while the referees tried to avoid a fight. She focused on getting up on her feet and towards the bench. Jessie, her lines mate, came over to check on her, but Jane mumbled an angry 'I'm fine' and Jessie backed off. Maura was anxiously pacing by the bench, and Jane sighed.
"Jane! Are you alright?" Maura asked as Jane stepped off the ice and sat down.
"What the hell happened?" Jane noticed her coach yelling at the referee and demanding a penalty, the crowd was still cheering and Heather had a firm grip on no 14's jersey while the referees tried to separate them.
"Number 14 hit you pretty bad. Are you alright?" Maura asked again and kneeled in front of Jane.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine."
The referees finally managed to loosen Heather's grip and they escorted them both to their respective penalty boxes. "Boston number 5, five minutes for roughing. Denver number 14, two minutes for interference."
"What?!" Coach Landers stepped up on the bench, red in his face. "Are you fucking serious? That was not a clean hit, ref! That's bullshit!"
Jane just sighed and shook her head. They were in for a rough part of the period. Giving up power play goals was one of their biggest weaknesses, and Denver was soon to go on a three-minute power play. And Boston's number 5, Heather Thompson, was by far their best player on a penalty kill.
Jane usually loved playing four on four after both teams had received a penalty each, but she couldn't shake the thought that they were in for a fight in just two minutes. She was torn and couldn't decide if she should give her best while they were still even, or if she should save her energy for the penalty kill. It all culminated in somewhere in between.
Both Sarah and Jane were on the ice when Denver's penalty was up and they were back to full strength. Jane barely noticed Louisa yelling something from the goal about moving their feet, she was too busy keeping track of the puck and Denver's left defense. She knew just how good Denver was on the power play and who to look out for. She knew Sarah was really good at protecting the puck behind the net and could turn an innocent play into a huge scoring chance. Everything she knew made Jane want to be all over the ice, and in a weak moment she yelled at herself for not preparing her team better. She could've told them so many small things that could make a difference in their favor.
Denver moved the puck quickly, from side to side, and Jane was getting exhausted. She had been on the ice for too long. Denver's left defense, number 42, had the puck, and Jane tried to gather strength to do her job. She moved her stick to her right hand and tried to block the passing line along the boards. Just as she did, Denver's 42 moved to the left instead, and Jane had to reposition herself. Stick back in her left hand, cutting off the passing line towards the goal. They moved closer to the middle of the ice, and for just a second, Jane lost her focus. By the time she discovered Sarah had moved to the open space Jane had just left, it was too late. Number 42 passed the puck to Sarah and Jane could only turn around and see how Sarah fired off a shot that slipped through between Louisa's arm and body, and then the place exploded. Sarah seemed calm and merely raised her stick in the air while staring at Jane before she was surrounded by the rest of her team.
Jane cursed and rested her stick on her thighs. A part of her was happy she could finally get off the ice, but that tiny part was out shadowed by the guilt and anger. She had failed and the worst possible punishment was a fact. In the corner of her eye she saw Heather exiting the penalty box and heading towards her. Before she made it over to Jane, Sarah skated slowly towards Jane and was humming. As she reached Jane, she stopped, and Jane looked up.
"Best pleasure you've ever given me, sweetie" Sarah grinned before she skated off.
Jane stared down at the ice, thankful she was too tired to react.
"Come on, Rizzoli, we still have plenty of time" Heather said as she tapped her stick on Jane's leg. "And that was my fault, I shouldn't have lost my cool."
Jane sighed before she followed Heather to the bench. Several of the girls gave her a comforting pat on the shoulder, but Jane hated it. She sat down and leaned her elbows on her knees. Her head dropped and she could feel Maura's burning eyes in her neck.
Penalties kill the Devils.
Once again the penalty kill is the Devils' biggest enemy. Rizzoli's first trip back to Denver ended in a crushing 4-1 loss. Even though Boston got an early lead by D Heather Thompson, Denver dominated throughout the game and sealed their victory with two power play goals in the second period, both scored by left winger Sarah Monterey. Neither coach Landers nor Rizzoli wanted to talk about the questionable penalty that led to the first goal, even though it was obvious they felt it was an unfair decision. So we asked team captain Heather Thompson.
"That hit was dirty. Enough said. Rizzoli wasn't even close to the puck, and they even had possession. I lost my cool, and I've apologized to the team, but no one hits one of my team mates like that without paying for it. And two minutes was not the right call. However, I take responsibility for my own penalty and the goal. It shouldn't have happened."
Denver's second goal also came on the power play, but this time it was Rizzoli who served a penalty for tripping. The Devils are now going back to Boston where they will face off against New York later this week.
