Christmas came way too soon like usual, and even though Jane tried to enjoy the days off and the food, the New Year's dinner was always in the back of her mind. The mess had just gotten more complicated and she didn't know how she was gonna survive a whole night with Maura in the same room.

As soon as the traditional Christmas dinners and visits were over, Jane headed out one night with Frost and Danielle. Ever since she promised Frost a night out, she felt bad for never having the time, so she tried to make it up to him with one great night. At least that was her plan. They started out with drinks and dinner before moving on to one of their favorite clubs. Jane kept her eyes peeled for any potential flirts for Frost, and after a while she found someone that both she and Danielle accepted.

"She's cute" Danielle commented as she watched a brunette at the end of the bar with her friends. "Nice smile, not too much make up. I approve."

"Then we all agree" Jane said pleased. "Now it's up to you to establish eye contact, buddy." She nudged Frost's arm.

"I know" he said and looked down the bar towards the brunette. "And she's actually cute, I'm surprised you guys agreed on someone that quickly."

Danielle emptied her glass and waived at the bartender. "You know" she started and turned to Frost. "Jane and I actually work really well together, as long as it doesn't concern any of us."

"Yeah, that usually ends in a battlefield" Jane snickered.

"Exactly. So if we agree on a girl for you, you should listen to us." Danielle ordered a new drink when the bartender came over to them. "And preferably make a move."

Frost laughed and nodded. "Yeah… that's kinda why I have Jane here."

"I know she's your wingman and all" Danielle replied. "But she's not gonna be around forever you know, hell, maybe she even settles down before any of us and then what are you gonna do?"

Jane laughed while she leaned over the bar to look at her friend that was sitting on the other side of Frost. "Okay, Dani, you're getting drunk already!" She reached for Danielle's drink and moved it out of her reach. "Go easy with the drinks if you wanna survive the night. And by the way, you are the one who's already engaged…"

Danielle giggled and looked between Jane and Frost. "Yeah I can't hold my booze like I used to… that's what relationships do to you. You grow up. You can't party anymore. It kinda sucks actually."

Frost decided to move Danielle's drink even further away while he shook his head. "I thought we were picking up a girl for me, not sulking over your lost youth" he teased.

"Oh, right! The girl." Danielle was suddenly back on track and looked over at the brunette. "So, has she noticed you yet?"

Jane smiled and looked down at her drink. "Not with your big head in the way."

"What?" Danielle asked and turned around, apparently not hearing exactly what Jane said.

Frost shook his head but with a big grin on his face.

After a few minutes they all noticed that the brunette had in fact seen Frost and smiles were exchanged. Jane subtly bumped fist with Frost and prepared herself for what she was going to say when the brunette eventually made her way over to them. It somehow worked when Jane hijacked the initial conversation and casually mentioned Frost was a cop. Based on the girl's reaction, Jane had several ways to go. So when the brunette got up from her chair and made her way over to them, Jane, Frost and Danielle pretended not to see it and started a random conversation.

"Hi, excuse me" the brunette said as she stopped behind Danielle.

The trio turned around and Frost smiled. "Hi."

"I am sorry for staring, but you just seemed so familiar."

Frost's smile died instantly when he noticed the brunette was looking at Jane, and not him. He turned to Jane and gave her a look of despair.

Jane, who had not been looking at the brunette, needed a slight nod from Frost in the brunette's direction to look at her. The brunette was in fact looking at her, and Jane was caught off guard. "Who, me?"

"Yes" the brunette smiled. "It feels like I've seen you somewhere or met you before."

"I…uh…" Jane looked desperately for help from Danielle, but her best friend just grinned back at her. "I don't think we've met" Jane explained and looked at the brunette. Was this woman really using a line that awful on her?

"Wait, you're a devil!" the brunette blurted out. "You're Rizzoli." She seemed happy to remember the name.

Jane chuckled and nodded. "Yeah, I am."

"That game against Denver was so good. You were really great in that game."

"Thanks" Jane smiled and tried to stop herself from laughing when she saw Frost roll his eyes.

The brunette stepped closer. "So…" She looked at Jane from top to bottom before smirking. "You're single, right?"

Out of the corner of her eye, Jane saw Frost and Danielle smiling, but Jane was a bit uncomfortable. She moved in her seat and swallowed. "Look, I'm… really not looking for anything right now."

"Neither am I" the brunette shrugged, but her smile said otherwise. "Can I just buy you a drink?"

Jane sighed silently and looked over at Frost and Danielle. This wasn't how the night was supposed to go. She was there to find a girl for Frost, and if that failed, she had decided to just have fun with her friends. A girl hitting on her was not even in Jane's thoughts. She felt like she needed advice or permission from her friends and tried to convey it with a simple look. But both her friends were already smiling at her and winking. Jane looked back at the brunette who was patiently waiting for her response. "Sure" Jane finally said and smiled. "Why not?"


Danielle
So…

Jane
So…

Danielle
Where are you?

Jane
At home, in bed. It's my day off after all.

Danielle
Sure… sure… alone?

Jane
Lol! Seriously? It took you long enough to ask!

Danielle
I was afraid I was interrupting something…

Jane
No worries. I'm alone.

Danielle
Oh. When did miss crazy ass fan leave?

Jane
Stop calling her that! It freaks me out. And a while ago. Before I woke up actually. Luckily.

Danielle
Okay fine, she wasn't crazy. But seriously! That night took an unexpected twist! I was so sure you would turn her down.

Jane
I planned to.

Danielle
So why didn't you?

Jane
Well… a girl's gotta eat…

Danielle
Ugh! Thanks! You just ruined my appetite….

Jane
My pleasure!

Danielle
I think I'm gonna go throw up now.

Jane
You asked ;)


Jane slowly looked around the ballroom the team had rented for their New Year's dinner. Everyone was there, from players to coaches and managers, and they were all dressed up in beautiful dresses or tailored suits. Jane felt completely underdressed as her eyes found Heather in the crowd. She should've known. She always hated these formal dinners. "God damn, I look like the black sheep in this sea of dresses" she muttered as she got close enough to Heather.

Heather smiled. "Relax Jane. There's no strict dress code. You're fine."

Jane sighed frustrated. "I don't feel fine though…"

The remark was ignored as Heather stared past Jane with wide eyes. "Damn… doctor Isles, you're looking hot!" she smiled.

The comment made Jane turn around on the spot and what she saw made her take a deep breath. She knew it right away when Maura made her way towards them. In her black sleeveless dress that hugged the perfect curves, the doctor looked stunning. No doubt. But Jane's eyes were glued to Maura's chest, where the dress went low, almost too low, showing off her cleavage like it was a piece of art. And Jane knew she was in for one hell of a battle that night. She barely acknowledged Maura talking to her and had to tear her eyes up to the doctor's face. "Huh? Sorry…"

Maura smiled, if she had noticed Jane almost drooling over her, she didn't point it out. "I just said how nice you look."

Jane looked down at herself. With black pants, a simple white shirt and a blazer she didn't really feel she fit in with the rest of the girls in dresses and skirts. "Oh… no I don't. I hate dressing up."

Heather choked a laugh while Maura sighed. "Don't say that. You look really nice."

With memories from the last time she got in an argument with Maura still alive, Jane decided to keep her mouth shut. Instead she smiled. Maura politely excused herself and continued to mingle. Jane's eyes followed her until she was out of sight.


Dinner proved to be mission impossible. After Jane and Heather had taken their seats, it didn't take long before Maura was on the other side of the table and took a seat right across Jane. And Jane suddenly found the flowers in the middle of the table extremely interesting.

She had no idea what they were served. She just ate it and tried to get through the dinner with at least a piece of her dignity still intact. Eyes trailed too often to Maura and that cleavage that begged for attention. She was on the edge of her seat, trying not to reach out and let her fingertips run over the exposed skin. She probably drank too much too quickly, and when dinner was consumed and people started to get up, Jane pretty much ran out of the room. She stopped out in the hallway, around a corner and leaned against the wall while she breathed out. This was bound to end in a disaster. There was no way she could go through this evening without doing something stupid.

"Jane?" The sound of heels against the floor echoed in the empty hallway and Jane cursed.

"Jane… are you alright?" Maura sounded concerned when she rounded the corner and spotted Jane, face buried in her hands.

Jane laughed softly and looked up. "No, I'm not okay. I'm going crazy."

"Why?" Maura stepped closer and seemed to think there was something genuinely wrong with Jane.

"Why? You need to ask why?" Jane met Maura halfway and quickly pushed her up against the wall. "This…" she murmured and placed her finger on Maura's chest. "This is why I'm going crazy." She let her finger roam over the skin, up and over the valleys. "I've been staring at this all night, wondering what it looks like underneath." She slowly looked up to Maura's eyes. "You are driving me crazy in this dress… and I don't trust myself anymore."

Maura's lips parted and Jane felt the hot air hitting her lips. She leaned closer, their lips almost touching. "And I'm not sure I can trust you either" Jane whispered. They both took the final step, and Jane cupped Maura's face in her hands. The second their lips met, Jane knew she wouldn't be able to stop. She wasn't strong enough to break whatever spell Maura had on her. It was all so addictive, feeling the warm body against hers, the demanding lips that seemed to have the same lack of self-control as hers. The doctor's hands were buried deep in her hair, and Jane lost all control over her own. They ran over Maura's body, down barely covered breasts and to hips that immediately pressed against her palms. Jane tried to think of ways to get rid of that dress when a mumbling voice tore them apart.

"Shit… sorry."

They both turned their heads to find Heather staring at them. Still with her hands around Jane's neck, Maura tried to hide herself against Jane's shoulder.

"I didn't know- I didn't see you go after Jane, I- I'm... just gonna leave now." Heather spun around and hurried back to the ballroom.

Jane sighed and closed her eyes for a second.

"Oh god" Maura mumbled against Jane's neck.

"Don't worry, she won't tell anyone." It sounded like a desperate plea to keep the doctor pressed against her body.

"No, Jane…" Maura removed herself from Jane and sighed. "We keep crossing all these lines… which we shouldn't."

"And I don't care."

"Well, I do! We need to stop this. It's gone too far already."

Jane growled and ran her fingers through her hair. "Yeah, you keep saying that. And then you kiss me. And I don't know what the hell is wrong. Why can't we do this, Maura? Just tell me. Before I lose my mind."

"For many reasons! We work together, I'm your doctor, you're too young."

"And still you keep leading me on!"

"I…" Maura stepped towards Jane, but stopped herself before she reached out. "I don't want to discuss this here…" she whispered. "But please, can you talk to Heather, make sure she won't say anything?"

Jane hated herself for being so weak for the sad look in Maura's eyes. "She won't, I know."

"Just… please?"

She didn't really have a choice; she knew she would do whatever Maura told her to. "Fine…" She sighed, but let her eyes linger on that beautiful woman in front of her. "I'll talk to her."

Heather stood by the bar and held out a beer when Jane sat down next to her. "I'm guessing you want one."

"I need one is more like it…" Jane tried to imagine the beer cooling down the boiling blood in her body as she took a long sip. "Look, Heather…"

"Don't bother, Jane." Heather turned to her and smiled. "I won't say anything, if that's what you're worried about."

Jane scoffed and shook her head. "I actually don't give a shit about what you do. But she does."

"Then you can tell her I won't say anything. And that I don't care. Well, of course I care… but I don't mind."

"You don't?"

Heather laughed softly. "Of course not. As long as you're happy." She clinked her bottle against Jane's, but ignored the eye roll that followed. "I kinda figured it out a couple of weeks ago anyway." She burst out laughing from the look on Jane's face.

"What?! How…?"

"The way you look at each other. You guys were practically drooling all over each other one morning on the last road trip. I'm pretty sure none of you noticed how I tried not to laugh at you."

Jane's cheeks burned from the memory of that breakfast. She looked down at the bottle in her hands and slowly started laughing. "You asshole. You should've said something! I can't believe I was about to say you were a good friend."

They both started laughing and Jane relaxed a little. "Can you do me a favor tonight?"

"Hey, I'm not gonna be a look out while you guys are doing it in the bathroom…"

Jane was about to strongly disagree with Heather's words, but ended up laughing again. "You're such a jerk… but not what I was gonna ask. If you catch me staring at her tonight, will you hit me in the head? Preferably with a bottle?"

"Anything for you, my friend" Heather winked.

Just moments after Jane had emptied her beer, Maura came over to them, clearly nervous. "Heather, I wanted to apologi-"

"Don't" Heather stopped her. "No need. I don't mind, and I won't say a word. Promise" she smiled.

Jane could almost see the weight of the world disappear from Maura's shoulder, and she squeezed the empty bottle in her hand. Something was still burning violently inside her.

"Thank you, I really appreciate that" Maura almost whispered. She smiled at them both before she turned around and walked away.

Jane watched the black dress slowly slip away until she felt a burning slap in the back of her head. "Ouch! Fuck…" She rubbed her head and turned to Heather who just looked at her.

"What? I have to finish my beer before I can use the bottle."

Jane sighed and let out a short laugh. "Thanks…."

They stayed by the bar for a while, chatting and drinking, and Jane finally started to relax. After she stopped looking around in case Maura was nearby, she managed to hold a real conversation without Heather nagging and teasing about having to share her attention.

She had been drinking a lot, more than she realized, and when she got up to use the bathroom, she felt the effects of it. The room was slowly spinning, and Jane told herself that she should take it easy with the drinks from now on.

When she exited the bathroom, she noticed a couple of girls hanging outside the door and it immediately filled her head with all sorts of thoughts. Heather's joke earlier about being a look out turned into mental pictures of the cleavage of a certain doctor. And she was lost. She could still feel Maura's lips and hands, her hips against her own hands, and Jane had to stop and lean against the wall for a second. What if Heather hadn't walked in on them?

Jane looked around in the crowded room. There were so many strangers in the room, boyfriends, wives, husbands. Husbands... Maura wasn't married, she didn't have a husband. Jane's thoughts boarded a freight train and soon she was walking around determined to find Maura. Maura who was alone here, no husband, no boyfriend. So what if they worked together? She looked around, more and more desperate as she didn't see that black dress or the cleavage it tried so desperately to contain.

Back at the bar, she found Heather chatting with Louisa and Jane gently tapped Heather's shoulder. "Hey, have you seen Maura?" she whispered.

Heather turned around and tilted her head. "Do I have to hit you again?"

"What?" Jane asked confused.

"You told me to hit you if I ever caught you staring at her tonight. And my bottle is almost empty, I'd be careful if I was you."

Jane sighed and shook her head. "No, I just need to talk to her. Have you seen her or not?"

"Are you sure that's all you're gonna do with her?" Heather said low. "Just talking, no… fooling around?"

"Never mind. I'll find her myself…" Jane scoffed and walked away.

She walked around the room one more time before she sat down by one of the empty tables and sighed. Maura was nowhere to be seen. Jane motioned for one of the waiters with a tray full of her favorite beer.

"Look who we have here, the life of the party!"

Jane looked up and found Wallace smiling at her, and she scrunched her nose. "Buzz off" she slurred.

"Buzz off?" Wallace laughed. "What? Doctor Isles doesn't like it when you use bad words…?"

Jane took a deep breath. "You know what, if you want me to break your nose again, just ask! I'll be happy to do it."

"Yeah, like you're able to hit anything other than the floor right now…"

"So that's why you're here trying to piss me off? You feel safe because you think I'm too drunk to fight you!" Jane laughed, mostly because she was surprised and proud over her own comment. Even though it could be true for all she knew.

"Don't flatter yourself. So what sorrows are you drowning? Did she dump you?" Wallace leaned on one of the chairs.

"Just go be annoying somewhere else…"

"Fine" Wallace grinned and looked out into the room. "Maybe I'll go and have a chat with the doctor over there…"

Jane turned around so fast she almost fell off the chair. She could practically see how Maura was running towards her, saying she had changed her mind, they could absolutely do 'this', that she wanted Jane, she had since day one. So when an evil laugh brought Jane back to reality, only to discover there was no doctor running towards her, she snapped. "You fucking bitch!" She jumped up from her chair and threw a punch towards the laughter.

It wasn't hard, but enough to throw Wallace off balance. She stumbled back into the chairs and had to fight to keep from falling.

"I'm fucking done with you and your pissy remarks!" Jane growled. She took a step towards Wallace, ready to fight her again, but a pair of arms wrapped around her stomach and pulled her back.

"Whoa, whoa! You're shitting me right? Are you absolutely insane or just stupid?"

Jane recognized Heather's voice and fought to get away from her. But Heather was somehow stronger than Jane.

"Forget it! You're going home! Now!" Heather released Jane only to grab her arm and drag her towards the exit.

"Let me go. I'm not a child!"

"Really?!" Heather stopped and turned to Jane. "Cause you certainly act like one right now! What the hell are you trying to accomplish by lashing out at Wallace again? It's not her fault!"

"She's asking for it! She's a psycho, and I've had enough of her bullshit!"

Heather shook her head and continued out through the door and into the hallway, still dragging Jane after her.

"Heather, I'm serious! Let me go!" Jane continued to argue.

But Heather didn't stop until they were outside in the chilly air. She pulled out her phone from her purse and called for a cab. Jane glared at her until she ended the call and returned the glare. "You're a mess, Jane. What the hell happened?"

Jane looked away and folded her arms across her chest. "Screw you…"

They stood in complete silence while they waited. Jane stared at the ground most of the time, trying to remain angry at Heather, Wallace, everything. But as the minutes passed, it became more and more difficult. The fresh air quickly cleared up her thoughts and brought all the memories and emotions from the last week to the surface. When the cab arrived, Jane marched right up to it and got in.

"Call me tomorrow, okay?" Heather halfway ordered before Jane could shut the door.

"Fine" Jane mumbled and forced her to take a step back by closing the door.

"Where to, miss?" the driver asked and looked at her in the rearview mirror.

Her address was about to slip from her tongue, but Jane stopped herself. As she looked at the eyes in the mirror waiting for her answer, she couldn't help the thoughts in her head; no way she was going home now, she still needed to find Maura. She quickly pulled out her phone to find the exact address. At the same time, she steered the driver in the right direction. "Beacon Hill."


She didn't stop to think about what she was doing, instead she double checked the address before she walked up to the door. It sounded like the whole neighborhood was partying, and she didn't realize that Maura's house was one of the sources.

Maura looked surprised when she opened the door, but quickly recovered. "Jane, what are you doing here?!" She threw a glance inside the house before she stepped outside and pulled the door closer to her.

"I need to talk to you."

"We can talk tomorrow, it's late."

"No, we can't. Cause I can't take this anymore." Jane took a step closer but kept her distance. "I'm going crazy, and… you're confusing. Why did you leave the party?"

"You're drunk" Maura stated.

Jane laughed. "It's fucking new year's eve! Of course I'm drunk."

"Jane, please go home. I'm not doing this now."

"I'm not going home. Why should I? I can't get you out of my head, and yeah, I am attracted to you. I have been since the first day I saw you, but I think you know that by now. It's just…" Jane took a deep breath and pulled back the hair from her face. She ignored the small sighs and protests from Maura. "There's more. Yeah, I want you. Like really want you. But I want all of you. Tonight, tomorrow, next week. And I know you care about me too!"

Maura released the doorknob she had been gripping tightly. Instead she took a step closer to Jane and reached for her arm. "Please, go home-"

"No! DON'T… touch me." Jane pulled back her arms and froze. "I'm not sure I can control myself if you do."

"Then you better go" Maura continued. "It's late, and you are way out of line now. I can call you a cab-"

"Jesus Christ, you don't get it!" Jane sighed. As she stood there staring at Maura she realized that drinking had been a good thing. She was just drunk enough for her head to slow down, but not too drunk to get the things off her chest.

"Get what?" Maura asked annoyed. "I am not discussing this with you now."

"Maura… is everything okay?"

The dark voice coming from inside the house made Jane sober up right away. She watched the expression on Maura's face turn from angry to scared as a handsome guy in a suit showed up by her side. Jane looked briefly at the guy before she turned back to Maura. "Who the hell is this?"

Maura turned her eyes to the ground and bit her lip.

"I'm… Ryan. And you are?"

Jane slowly turned her attention to this man that was standing a bit too close to Maura for Jane's liking. "Ryan…?" she fished.

"Her fiancé."

Maybe she was more drunk than she thought, or perhaps she was dreaming, having a horrible nightmare. "You're kidding, right? Maura, please tell me he's kidding!" But the doctor didn't utter a word.

"Who are you?" Ryan tried again.

Jane kept her eyes on Maura who was still staring down at the ground. "Apparently I'm nobody…" she whispered.

This got Maura's attention and she looked up at Jane. "Go home. Please."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jane felt like she was about to cry and she took a deep breath. "You should've told me. None of this would've happened if I knew you were engaged…"

"Just what the hell is going on? Maura?" Ryan looked at his fiancée, waiting for an answer or some sort of explanation.

Maura seemed completely numb, like she didn't hear the words or even see the two angry and confused people around her. The sight of an indifferent Maura made Jane angry. How could she just stand there and not care anymore? "You know what, screw this. I guess you were right after all; I don't know you." Jane turned around and forced her legs to carry her away from everything.