As Ed's finger tapped the date on the calendar, Holly's face drained of all color. Visions of her making love with Roger danced in her head. She couldn't marry Ed now, not again. The room felt close and warm. She could see Ed's mouth moving, but could't hear words. Her vision grayed and then turned black. She didn't feel it, but she landed on the kitchen floor with a thud. When her eyes fluttered open Ed's was the face she saw.

"There you are," He said calmly though his forehead was clenched tightly and his eyes were filled with concern. "Take it easy, don't sit up too quickly" Slowly he helped guide her upward. "Ok, that's good," He advised, leaning her head on his chest. "You should eat something." He said quietly.

"Ed, are you sure?" She asked him.

"That you need to eat something? Yes, I'm sure." He said.

"No, about Cliff House," She asked. "I mean, you can't be mistaken?"

"Holly, there is no doubt. I just wish I had told you sooner. I'm so sorry."

Holly's eyes narrowed and then closed. Roger must have told him they slept together, but why hadn't Ed told her sooner. Was he punishing her? "Oh Ed, it wasn't your fault, it was mine" tears were streaming down her face.

Ed looked confused. "Holly? Didn't you hear me? I was hung over when I arrived. I proposed to you under false pretenses. How is that your fault?"

Now stunned Holly tried to stand.

"Easy" He said, helping her up and into a chair. "I'm sorry I just sprung that on you. I should have been more considerate considering your condition." Ed indicated.

Holly waved him off. "That can wait, but I want you to repeat what you told me" She said anxiously.

"I said I'm sorry, that I can't marry you. Not yet anyway." He said.

Holly's eyes closed. He knew. He knew about Roger. He knew that she had slept with him. He had every right to tell her he couldn't, wouldn't marry her.

"I'm going to need you to promise that you will take care of Michelle while I'm gone." He said.

"Gone? Ed, what are you talking about?"

Ed's eyes narrowed. "Did you hit your head when you fainted?" He reached up as if he were going to check for bumps but she pushed his hands away.

"Stop it, I mean it. What do you mean, gone? What are you talking about?"

"Holly, I've started drinking again." He said it plainly.

Holly closed her eyes and shook her head. "I'm confused. What do you mean by drinking again? I haven't seen you with a drink in your hand, much less drunk." Her confusion was genuine

"It started the night that Vanessa told you about me and Lillian. Michelle was gone, you had left, I was angry so I went to the country club. I thought I'd play some racquetball, take my frustration out on a piece of rubber. Only I ran into Eve Guthrie instead."

Holly scoffed, "Let me guess what happened next." Her lips formed a tight line. "You got drunk and slept with her"

Ed rolled his eyes. "No, I did not. She saw that I was upset. She asked if I'd like to sit down. She was at the bar, and there was a drink in front of her. Seeing that I was upset she handed me the drink, suggested I relax and try to forget about the day." He pantomimed his movements as he told the remainder of the story. "First I stared at the amber liquid and then I smelled it." He inhaled deeply at the memory. "Oh Holly, it smelled just like I remembered it. Rich, and warm. Even without drinking it I could feel it going down my throat, tasting the burn as it went."

"And" she asked, her anger evident.

"And then I did. I took the first drink and drained the glass. I thanked Eve and pretended to leave. When I saw that she was gone, and there was no one else I knew there I ordered another. I didn't get drunk that night, but that was it, I was hooked. From then on whenever I was alone I would have a drink or two, or more." He shrugged.

"So this is why you wanted to continue living apart? Not for Michelles sake, but for Johnnie Walker?" She wished she had something to throw at him.

"I guess." He said quietly. "I still want to marry you, but after the Cliff House, I don't know if I can. Not yet." He repeated.

Afraid, but needing to know, Holly asked. "What about the Cliff House, Ed?"

"I lied to you Holly. I didn't have to cover a shift at the hospital. I was afraid. I knew I was going to ask you to marry me, but was afraid you'd turn me down. So I went to the bar and I got drunk. That is why Michelle was so angry at me when we got there. I lied when I told you it was because I told her we were getting married."

Holly's head was spinning again, guilt became anger. "You're damn right Ed, we won't be getting married, not now, not ever!" She practically spat.

"What about the baby?" Ed asked genuinely. His eyes locked with the floor. "I may not remember creating her, but I know she is on her way, and damn it Holly I am going to go to rehab and I'm going to get sober."

Holly's eyes burned, her head was swimming. "Get out of my house Ed. Get out!" She screamed.

"Fine, but Holly I promise you, we will be married!" Ed spat.

As he hit the door, Holly looked up and yelled "Ed, wait"

He turned slightly, hopeful that she would forgive him. "What about Michelle?"

Ed's head slumped. His hand waved "I will call you when arrangements are made" He disappeared behind the door.

Hours later Holly, still dressed in her pajamas and robe, sat on her couch drinking water. She jumped when she heard the knock on the door followed by its opening.

"Mother, my God, where have you been? I've been trying to reach you and Ed all morning and neither of you were answering." Blake threw her purse on the chair and waltzed into the room. "Did you forget Ross and I were meeting you at the courthouse?"

Holly stared at her daughter as if she were speaking in some foreign tongue that she didn't understand.

"Earth to Holly Lindsey," Blake said. "What is going on with you? It may be five o'clock somewhere, but not in Springfield, mother."

"Why would you say that?" Holly finally spat when she spoke. "Do you think you're humorous Blake? Do you think that is appropriate? What's next, you tell me your father is waiting in the car to check on my health and wellbeing too?"

"Alright, I'm sorry. I was just trying to lighten the mood, I've obviously failed." Blake moved her purse to the side and sat in the chair she had thrown it on. "What happened? Was Ed called into an emergency or something?"

"Or something," Holly answered cryptically. "Listen Blake, I should have called you. There isn't going to be a wedding."

Giddily Blake clapped her hands. "Oh Mother, that is wonderful. You've come to your senses. Maybe I should call Daddy. He will be thrilled. Of course he's got to get rid of that daft cow, Jenna Bradshaw but that will be easy once he finds out that you're not off the market after all."

Holly bristled then stiffened. "Blake, I don't want you telling your father anything, do you understand me? From this moment on my life is my own. It is not for the consumption of you, or Ross, or Roger Thorpe for that matter. He has nothing to do with anything that is going on in my life, do you understand me?"

"Wow, we are a little testy aren't we. Perhaps you could use a drink after all. I'll pour. Besides, once I give you my news you're going to want one anyway." Blake jumped from the chair and headed to the kitchen. "So what happened? No, forget I asked. You don't want to tell me. I understand. And don't worry, I promise I won't tell Daddy. I can't anyway, he is in England with that tart. What he sees in her I will never know."

Holly could hear her rummaging through the cupboards looking for stemware. "You reorganized" It was a statement, not a question. "I guess since Ed was here it makes sense. It's not like the two of you sat by the fire with wine in your hands. Ah, there we go."

Holly heard the tinking of glasses but continued to ignore Blake's running monologue.

"Do you want white or red?" She asked.

"Neither Blake, I'm not drinking and frankly neither should you."

"Why not?" Blake asked, popping the cork on a chilled bottle from the fridge.

"Because you will be getting back in your car, or on your broom and going home. You weren't invited, remember?"

Blake carried two glasses to the living room, setting one in front of her mother.

"One glass isn't going to put me over the legal limit mother." she said before tipping the glass to her lips. Holly's remained on the table where it was set.

"Look, I want to be alone. Tell me your news, and then go, please."

Blake looked at her suspiciously. "Are you sure you don't want a drink first? Calm your nerves?"

The look Holly shot her confirmed that she did not and that Blake should get on with it.

"Alright, don't say I didn't warn you. Mother, Ross and I are getting married" Blake gushed.

"I'm aware. Now you may go." Holly brushed her off.

"No mother, you don't understand. Ross and I are getting married in two months. We've decided on a Thanksgiving wedding."

Slowly Holly's eyes met Blakes. "Well, isn't that something? At least you decided not to ruin my birthday and Christmas. Thank you for that."

Blake finished her wine, and then grabbed her purse. "You know what mother, I really thought we had gotten past this, but I guess not." She shot up out of the chair and dropped her glass to the table.

Holly in turn jumped off the couch and closed the distance between the pair. She put her arms around Blake and hugged her tightly. "Oh honey, I'm sorry. It's not you. It's me. I am genuinely happy for you and Ross." She said this as tears fell down her cheeks. "I will help you in any way I can, I promise."

Blake pulled out of her mothers embrace. "Are you alright? What happened?"

Holly wiped her tears and waved her off. "Can we talk about it another day? I'm sure you and Ross want to go celebrate, and I have some calls to make."

"Sure, I guess."

"Thank you honey, and please, do not tell Roger about this, any of this. Alright?"

Blake agreed, kissed her mother on the cheek and left, pulling her cell phone out of her purse when the door closed behind her. When she was away from the door she whispered "Daddy, you've got to get home as quickly as possible. Mom and Ed didn't get married. Call me"