A/N: Ok it's been a very long time. Like, seven years. I obviously got out of the fandom and it's been a hard time getting back into it. I write in other fandoms, but I also write for multiple publishing companies as a romance ghostwriter. So I am very busy. If you are just discovering this story, welcome. I haven't gone back through the previous chapters to update the writing, so the first four chapters might be rough in terms of editing. My writing has grown a lot over the past seven years. This chapter was ¾ of the way written already, so I finished it up and I think I have a rough idea of where I would like to go with it.
I also have some chapters written for In Between Worlds, so if you are a follower of that story, then there will be some chapters coming your way. I will be getting all of my Buffy stories completed. I am not abandoning any of them, it's just going to take some time to get them all completed.
Chapter 4
It wasn't until five at night did Spike finally come down the stairs. He had been up until the morning hours working on the blueprints and getting them all figured out and with a list of materials he wanted the house to have. Spike had left it on the kitchen island counter knowing that Xander would be by later when he was sleeping to grab it. Spike was sleeping peacefully until he felt Riley coming into the house. The feel of Riley was enough to wake Spike up from a sound sleep. Spike couldn't wait until the month had passed and he wouldn't have to deal with having Riley around him unless he was around Buffy. Spike was enjoying the time he was getting to spend with the Summers women, but he also knew that eventually it would be too much stress on his new friendship with Buffy. Spike didn't want to annoy her and it goes back to them being at odds with each other. Spike was enjoying this new friendship he had with Buffy and it was less painful than how the relationship used to be like.
Spike got dressed and headed down the stairs to see Willow, Joyce, Dawn, Buffy, Xander, Giles and Riley were in the living room. Spike looked in and headed to the kitchen to get some blood into him for the day. He hadn't had any since he went to bed this morning around six. He was still healing and he knew he would need to be drinking enough blood to help him heal. Thankfully he still had some of Angel's blood left that he could drink.
Spike got it out and warmed it up in a mug before he drank it. He couldn't stop his eyes from glowing yellow as he tasted Angel's blood, Sire blood. Spike knew that Drusilla had been his official Sire, but when Angel claimed him as his own Spike's demon instantly connected to Angel's demon and Angel had become his true Sire. They had been through a lot in the past century, but they had also had a lot of good times together. With drinking Angel's blood Spike's demon had been calling out more and more for Angel. Spike hadn't seen Angel since he had tortured him last year. Angel had come by to see him when he was gravely injured, but Spike hadn't been able to talk to him with him being unconscious.
Spike's demon wanted his Sire, but Spike wasn't about to travel to L.A just for Angel. He could put it off longer still he had done it before and he would do it again. Spike knew that if his demon could feel it then so could Angel's demon. Eventually they would have to give in once more and meet each other, but for now Spike was going to hold off and hopefully Angel would break first and come to him if not he would have to go to Angel before the pain became too much. That was one of the problems with the Sire adoption route. It bound their demons in a deep way. They needed that physical connection every now and then in order to keep the physical pain away from the distance between them. At first they could only go a day or two before it became too much. Now they can go a few years without needing to meet up for one night. They hadn't done anything in close to five years now. Even when Angel was evil they never did anything as his demon was too unstable and refused to connect with Spike. Something that had hurt more than being in the wheelchair. There were a lot of hurt and hard feelings on Spike's side still and he didn't know how long they would be there until Spike and his demon felt better about the situation.
With the blood gone Spike was feeling good. He was feeling that normal high he always got with Sire blood flowing through his body. Spike headed into the living room where the others were and he was clearly feeling no pain until the high wore off in thirty minutes. Spike leaned against the door frame into the living room and the others looked at him.
"Are you high?" Buffy asked, confused as she saw that Spike's eyes were a little glossy.
"I drank Angel's blood." Spike said like that would explain everything.
"I'm not sure what that has to do with you being stoned right now." Buffy said, confused.
"It's the effect that a Sire's blood has on their Childe. The same thing would happen to Angel if he drank my blood. It'll wear off in thirty." Spike explained.
"Fascinating. Can you feel him as well?" Giles asked.
"Only if he's in town. Used to be able to tell where he is on the same side of the world, but that was in the beginnin'. We don't spend that much time around each other since he got all souled up." Spike answered.
"But you could tell when the other was in trouble and where they were?" Giles asked, looking for more information on a relationship that wasn't really recorded anywhere.
"Ya. Could tell what the other was thinkin' when we wanted to. That was in the beginnin' though when we were drinking from each other. We can't do that no more."
"Could you if you drank from each other once again?" Giles asked.
"Suppose, but we don't do that. I haven't had his blood in a long time. We'd have to do it pretty regularly to get back to the old days."
"Then what are you still doing here? Go be with him out in L.A and leave my girlfriend and her family alone." Riley said with irritation in his voice.
"They're the ones that don't want me leavin." Spike said as he pointed to Buffy and Joyce.
"I told Spike to stay here where it is safer for him and us. He can leave once he has a safe house to be living in." Joyce said with strength in her voice.
"Oh I dropped your blueprints off to the head builder. He's gonna get the supplies for tomorrow and we're starting at eight in the morning." Xander said.
"Any idea how long it'll take?" Spike asked.
"He thinks a month before it'll be good to go. He's also gonna get those windows to put in so you don't have to worry about the UV rays. And he said something about a demon witch." Xander said, slightly confused.
"A demon witch can put up wards on the house so no one can just walk in or do any violence once inside." Spike explained.
"Demons have witches?" Willow asked, confused.
"They do. It's a different kind of magic, tends to be pretty dark. Some demons can do magic if they have human DNA and were witches before they were killed like a vampire or if their family line had magic in it for half-breeds." Spike explained.
"Do they often practice?" Giles asked.
"Don't know, depends on the demon. Some have the ability and don't use it." Spike answered.
"Why wouldn't they use it?" Buffy asked.
"Magic has consequences. The darker the magic the worst the consequences. Some demons don't care to play with that." Spike answered.
"Is it more powerful than normal black magic?" Giles asked.
"Pretty much the same just tends to be used for darker purposes. Demon's energy allows the magic to be darker and more powerful than a typical human witch given the situation." Spike said.
"So it varies on the situation. That's fascinating. Do you know any demons that are witches?" Giles asked.
"Ya and docs. The demon world is full of em."
"Doctors?" Willow asked, shocked.
"Course pet. Demons get hurt, they need to be healed, half-breeds. Docs work on humans when procedures are too dangerous to be done normally. You got some human with some terminal illness or inoperable tumor. If they are open minded they can be healed by a demon doc. They take it right out of 'em without ever cutting into 'em." Spike explained.
"Who the hell would ever be dumb enough to let some Demon work on them?" Riley said with disdain.
"Who would ever let some vampire feed off of them? It happens all the time. Besides these Docs are all good demons that took an oath. These humans are going to die anyways, why not try everything you could to survive?" Spike argued back.
"I'm not sure how I would feel about it, but if it was my very last chance to survive. I could see the appeal to it. I think any parent would." Joyce said.
"More often than you think. Where's Glinda?" Spike asked.
"She had to help with setting up for a fundraiser." Willow answered.
"Any plans for tonight Luv?" Spike asked Buffy.
"Just normal patrolling. Why?" Buffy answered.
"Didn't know if you felt like trainin' is all." Spike said.
"Sure, but you're still healing. You shouldn't be fighting." Buffy said slightly concerned with the injuries that Spike still had.
"There's other ways to train outside of fightin' Luv." Spike said with a smirk.
"And what would that be?" Buffy asked, confused.
"I'll show you. If you think you're up for the challenge." Spike challenged with a smirk knowing that it would make Buffy do what he wanted.
"Challenge? As if." Buffy said as she stood up.
Spike did as well and he nodded his head towards the back door as he spoke. "Let's go then."
"I have some paperwork to get done for the gallery. You both be careful." Joyce said.
"Always." Buffy and Spike both said at the same time.
"Mmhm." Joyce said clearly not convinced, but she got up and headed up to her office to get her work done.
"I'd like to observe if that is alright." Giles said.
"Fine by me. The more the merrier right?" Spike said as he headed towards the backdoor.
They all followed behind Spike and out of the back door. Spike and Buffy went down onto the grass while the others stood up there on the back porch.
"So what are you going to teach me that is going to help me defeat Glory?" Buffy asked.
"You'll see. For this to work you need to trust me. You need to do what I say and trust that there is a point to it. Can you do that?" Spike said with complete seriousness in his voice.
"I trust you. I want to win so show me how." Buffy said with a serious voice right back.
"You have vampire essence in you as you know. It's what gives you your senses, your strength, your fighting ability."
"Something I've always wondered. If I have vampire essence in me, then why am I stronger than them? You're a Master Vampire and yet I can lift more than you. Why is that, if we have the same thing inside of us?" Buffy asked, genuinely confused and interested in the answer.
"Buffy doesn't have a demon inside of her." Riley said more to himself than to the others.
"Of course she does. That's how it works." Xander said.
"How else did you think she was so fast and strong?" Willow asked calmly.
"Figured she was born that way." Riley said clearly not happy about this new information.
"She was, but it didn't become active until she was fifteen." Xander said back.
"You have a vampire essence in you. I have a demon. The essence in you is pure vampire, an old vampire. The older the vampire the more pure the DNA makeup is. Mine is more diluted because of the human DNA that developed over the centuries within vampires. The Powers That Be always uses demons and vampires that have more pure DNA so they are stronger. With Slayers they take that essence and place it within you when you are born. So the essence, the vampire, grows stronger giving you the strength that you have. If you have a vampire essence inside of you that belongs to a vampire that is two thousand years old, each year that essence is inside of you it grows stronger as it would if the vampire was still alive. That's how you are stronger than Master Vampires, because your essence is very old, even though you aren't." Spike explained.
"Ok but then how do Slayers keep getting killed by weaker vampires and demons? You've killed two of them, what made them weaker?" Buffy asked.
"Could have killed more than two if I wanted to, but they held no interest to me, too weak. If it's not worth the fight then what's the point? As for your first question, not all Slayers get the same essence. The Powers That Be can't use the same essence every time. That would weaken it, make it less pure. It's why they try and keep it to only using it once every century. Not all Heaven demons and vampires are powerful. Not all of their essences will connect fully to the new Slayer. Some Slayers try and fight against their Slayer half and just want to be a normal human. That will make them weaker. Some don't train properly, some don't care to train and that gets them killed. Some die before they even stand a chance. Some are killed by their families for being possessed back in the day. Some of the ones that have lived long enough get tired and grow that death wish. Start thinkin' about ending it all and being at peace. It's different with every Slayer."
"So then how do I learn from their mistakes?"
"You can't. It's not about what they did or what they didn't do. It's about what you do and what you don't do. The best thing you can do is train and continue to fight for life. The second you start having a death wish. The second you start thinking about the peace up in that sky. That's when you'll lose. That is what the Watcher's Council got wrong. They wanted Slayers to be on their own, but being all alone in that violent world you live in is what kills most of them. They don't have anyone to be there for when the times get hard. They didn't have anyone to tell them that they were loved and to push forward. You have a family and friends that all love and depend on you to come back to them alive. That is what you hold on to."
"What I fight for." Buffy stated.
"Exactly. Now Slayers get trained by humans, they don't get trained by vampires or demons. It's why their essence never reaches its full potential. A human doesn't know how to access it. Bein' a vamp I do and I can show you how to do it. Once you fully accept the essence within you and connect to it, you'll be able to train it and grow it makin' you stronger."
"But how do I do that?"
"I'm gonna show you. Sit down right in front of me." Spike said as he sat down on the ground with his legs crossed.
Buffy went over and sat down in front of Spike with her legs crossed. She didn't know what was going to happen, but she trusted that Spike wouldn't do something to hurt her.
"Give me your hands." Spike said as he held his hands open and Buffy placed hers in his.
"What are we doing?" Buffy asked not sure where Spike was going with this.
"Meditate, sort of. Just trust me." Spike said.
"Alright." Buffy said still not sure how this was going to help.
"This is something I used to do to get control of my demon. It's how my two halves don't fight each other. Close your eyes and just listen to my voice. I'm gonna do it with you and try to bring out the essence in you. Later we can try it with just you doing it on your own."
Buffy closed her eyes as she spoke. "Ok"
Spike closed his eyes as he spoke gently and soothing to Buffy.
"Focus on that essence inside of you. On that part of you that speaks out when a vamp is near. The part that tells you when something doesn't feel right. Focus on that part of you and when you feel it tell me."
Buffy focused her mind on trying to locate that part of her that she always called her Slayer half. The part that told her what to do, the part that told her when danger was near. The part of her that told her how to fight. She focused her mind and looked solely for that part of her and once she knew she had found it she spoke.
"Ok."
"Good Luv. Now focus on me. Focus on the fact that a vampire is here in front of you. Let your essence find me. Let it connect to mine. Don't block it, don't control it, just like it do what it naturally does."
Buffy did as Spike said and let control of her essence inside of her. She let it try and feel out across the backyard. She could tell it was searching for something and once she felt Spike, felt that tingle inside of her, she knew that it found what it was looking for. Buffy didn't understand how any of this was possible, but at the same time she didn't care. This was completely different for her. She had never experienced anything like this or had even heard anything like this. She had always put one half of her against the other. She had always pushed the Slayer part of her down as far as she could whenever she could. This was the first time in her life that she had ever just let it out and let it be and she was finding it not nearly as terrifying as she thought it would be.
"I can feel you. This is so weird." Buffy said calmly and slightly amazed.
"Let me in Luv. Drop your walls completely, let yourself out and let me in." Spike said gently.
Buffy let out a shaky breath before she did what Spike said. She could feel that part in her mind telling her not to do it. That it wasn't smart or normal. Buffy pushed that part of her away and dropped her walls completely. There was a wave of emotions that went through her in a matter of seconds. Fear, vulnerability, unsure, insecure, but then she started to feel warm and cared for. She started to feel at peace and whole, something she hadn't felt before in a long time, not since she had become the Slayer. Buffy couldn't help the smile that touched her face.
"Oh my God."
"Neat eh?" Spike said with a warm smile.
"This is amazing. I've never felt like this before. Oh my God." Buffy said with a goofy smile of peace on her face.
Buffy tried to hold onto this feeling for as long as she could, but after a minute it was gone. Buffy opened her eyes and looked at Spike. Spike did the same as Buffy spoke.
"What was that?"
"That was your vampire connecting to mine. That was your body not fightin' with itself and just accepting you fully. The essence inside of you is strong, but your body and mind is always fightin' against it. In order for it to come out and for you to be at peace you needed my demon to connect with and for your mind to shut down. Eventually if you work on it, you'll be able to do it yourself and then accept it fully and feel like that naturally on your own." Spike explained.
"Can we do that again?" Buffy asked with hopefulness in her voice.
"Course Luv, as many times as you want." Spike easily agreed.
"Ok"
Buffy closed her eyes as did Spike and they both reached out to each other once again. Buffy focused on forcing her walls down and shutting up her mind and just allowing her body to feel the connection.
"Is this really a good idea? She shouldn't be letting her guard down around a vampire. Let alone letting that thing in." Riley harshly whispered.
"This is something Spike feels that Buffy needs to do. For now I am going to trust his judgment." Giles said.
"Trust that thing's judgment? It's an evil, soulless thing. It can't be trusted with Buffy or anyone, but especially her." Riley said appalled that Giles would ever trust Spike around Buffy.
"Buffy can handle Spike and for the last time stop referring to him as a thing or an it. Buffy knows how to handle herself and if she did not trust Spike she wouldn't be doing this. Now if you insist on staying then keep quiet and let them focus. This could very well be what saves Buffy's life one day." Giles lectured in a tone that they all knew meant that this conversation was over.
They stayed there for the next hour while Buffy and Spike connected to each other. Buffy couldn't help the smile on her face at the feelings that were going through her. She was loving how this was feeling and she didn't want this to end. She had no idea what this felt like for Spike on his end, but on hers it felt amazing. She didn't want this to end. Part of her mind was screaming at her that this was wrong. That letting a vampire this close to her was not a good idea. But it was quickly silenced out by this amazing feeling of connecting internally with herself. There was something freeing about this. She didn't want it to end, but after an hour she felt Spike remove his presence from her. She instantly felt like part of her was missing and she wasn't sure how she felt about it. She opened her eyes to see Spike's blue ones staring back at her.
"Why'd you stop?"
"To see if you could hold it on your own. If you work at it you'll be able to connect fully to both parts of yourself and be more at peace with it."
"I will be practice Buffy."
"Can you feel it stronger in you now?"
"Ya I can. Before it was there, but it was more of an annoyance. Now it doesn't bother me, feeling it."
"Good. Bein' in tune with it will help you fightin'. On to lesson two." Spike said as he got up.
Buffy got up as she spoke. "What's lesson two?"
"Usin' your senses to find the unfindable." Spike said as he went over to the group and pulled out a handkerchief from Giles' pocket.
"That's easy, I do it all the time." Buffy said.
"Blindfolded against a Master?" Spike asked with a smirk.
"I can sense you when you're near me." Buffy said back.
"Because I let you. You need to rely on the vamp inside of you. Your senses are stronger than you give them credit for. You need to train them. Work on hearin' and smell. Let the vamp inside of you free and you'll be amazed at what you find." Spike said as he tied the blindfold over Buffy's eyes.
"I thought we weren't fighting." Buffy said as she let Spike blindfold her.
"We aren't. I'm going to hide somewhere and you are going to seek. No wavin' your arms in front of you though. Use your hearin' and sense of smell to find me." Spike said, as he stepped back.
"Ok, do I count to ten?" Buffy said teasingly.
Spike leaned into her ear, "No." And just like that he was gone.
"Whoa, where did he go?" Xander asked surprised as they didn't even see Spike move.
"Vampires are fast, the older the vampire the faster they tend to be. It would appear we have not seen all of Spike's abilities." Giles said very interested in the display in front of him.
"He did hurt Glory." Willow added.
"He's so powerful, yet he got taken down by my squad." Riley said with pride in his voice.
"Spike was distracted watching Buffy fight. Everyone has a bad day." Giles automatically said, because he believed wholeheartedly that had Spike not been distracted he would have sensed the group coming and had taken them out.
They watched as Buffy stood there trying to find Spike. She didn't want to wander around like a loser trying to find him. Spike had said to use her senses and that's what she was going to do. He was teaching her how to be a better Slayer, a better fighter, the least she could do was listen to him. This was not something Buffy ever thought she would be doing, listening to Spike, letting Spike train her. But Spike had proven that he was able to handle himself against Glory. He had been able to seriously hurt her, something Buffy had yet to be able to do. It would be foolish for her to not listen to him and take his advice. The others all stood there watching as Buffy tried to find Spike. It was surprisingly an hour before she finally found him behind a tree.
"Oh my God, that took forever." Buffy said as she removed the blindfold slightly so she could see again.
"Better than I had expected you to do. It's easy to say that you can do it and another to be able to do it. You've been ignorin' the strongest part of you for all these years Luv. It's goin' to take some time and hard work to get you and the vamp inside of you on the same page." Spike said.
"No stranger to hard work, at least it's not in school." Buffy said with a smirk.
"Did you feel somethin'?"
"Sort of. I knew there was something out there, but I couldn't figure out where. It doesn't help that you don't breathe."
"No, but everythin' has a smell. Unless it's a newer vamp, vamps will smell like dirt. Demons will have their own smell, but none of them will be pleasant once you get used to it. I smell like leather and cigarettes. Your sense of smell is more powerful and helpful than you think. I can find you, your Mum or Niblet anywhere in this town right from where I'm standin'. Trust your nose when all else fails."
"Ok, let's go again." Buffy said as she put the blindfold back over her eyes.
Spike gave a smirk and he took off for a new place to hide. This time around he went over to where the others were and stood on the grass right below them. He wanted to see if she could pick him out among the other smells of her friends. It took her a good twenty minutes, but Buffy was able to finally locate Spike. She removed her blindfold as he spoke.
"Good, you knocked off ten minutes from your time."
"Ya, now I just need Glory to nicely stand still and not try and kill me while I seek her out." Buffy said with a small shake of her head. She was frustrated that she couldn't do this quicker. She thought she had great control over her senses, but now it was looking like she was back at square one. It was frustrating.
"You'll get it. You trained your body and mind to be a Slayer. Now you need to train the power behind your Slayer skills. Technically, it should have happened first, but Watchers long since stopped knowing how to properly train a Slayer when politics came into play. The strongest Slayers. The ones that lived the longest. They were all at peace with who they were."
Spike knew it was going to take time and there were going to be some frustrating moments, but he was confident she would get to the level she needed to be in order to survive Glory. In order to win.
"Ok. So we go again." Buffy said with complete determination in her voice.
"As many times as you want."
Spike was more than happy to spend all night training with Buffy. He didn't care how long it took, he was going to make sure that Buffy was ready and could handle whatever came her way.
