Set throughout season 2. The team acting like a family in the safehouses they shared.
"Shouldn't we wake Michael and Nikita?" Owen had thought he was the last one to wake in the safehouse. The rogues had a lot of things to do that day; they couldn't waste time sleeping in. However, when Owen moved towards the livingroom, he realized he and Birkhoff were the only ones awake. Nikita and Michael were surprisingly still asleep. Owen never figured those two to sleep longer than necessary. Things must've changed a lot since he had been gone.
"Is their door closed?" Birkhoff asked. Owen walked towards the couple's room, then nodded. He was going to go knock on the door, yet Birkhoff quickly stopped him. The hacker shuddered, shook his head, and warned gravely, "Never go near that door when it's closed."
Owen laughed. He had walked in on the couple making out before. He could only imagine what Birkhoff had then seen while living with the pair. If he shuddered at just the thought of it, then it must've been terrible. Sharing a space with a very active couple was not for the faint of heart- or the prude, "What's it like living in a safehouse together?"
Birkhoff's unamused, annoyed, and disgusted face said it all. Owen laughed again.
Groggily rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, Nikita trudged into the kitchen. The coffee pot was thankfully already turned on. She could immediately pour herself a mug of hot caffeine and start her day. However, as she reached for a mug, Birkhoff stole the last of the coffee. Nikita couldn't help but whine, "Hey. I wanted some."
Eyeing the sleepy pout on Nikita's face, Birkhoff decided to take pity on her- well, some pity. He spat the coffee he had already drank back into the mug and offered it to her with a smirk.
She glared at him menacingly. The look normally would've scared him off. But her just-woke-up appearance ruined her intimidation. Birkhoff just scoffed at her. Nikita's irritation quickly bubbled to the surface, and she bumped the mug in his hand as he took another sip. Hot coffee spilled all over him.
While Nikita smirked, Birkhoff hastily put the mug down and tried to wipe the burning coffee off his skin. Thankfully, he was only scalded, not burned. However, he was still pissed at what Nikita had done. She never thought before acting violently, and he was sick of paying the consequences. The day she got her ass kicked for her actions was the day he was going to celebrate, "What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you a fucking gremlin? Michael, whatever you do, don't feed that fucking thing after midnight."
"You're not supposed to get gremlins wet either, but every night, Michael…" Nikita began. But Birkhoff refused to hear the rest of it. He covered his ears, sang loudly, and ran away.
Instead of grabbing the ladder from the garage, Nikita climbed on top of the kitchen table to help Birkhoff wire the safehouse. She was pretty steady on it, and there was no chance of the furniture giving under her weight, so she didn't see any problem with her decision. And neither did Birkhoff. The only person who would've was out of the room.
Despite the fact that Michael was nowhere to be seen, the instant the table creaked as Nikita moved around, he shouted from some other room, "Get off the table!"
Nikita instantly climbed down off the table and looked around to see how Michael could've possibly seen her. She couldn't figure it out. Yet Birkhoff had an idea. He simply had to get control of his laughter first before he could share it, "Told you. He has a sixth sense for whenever you're in danger."
"So, are you gonna sit at the computer all day, or are you gonna train with me?" Michael shoved at Birkhoff's desk chair after he had noticed the nerd had been sitting there all day. He had to get up and move around at some point. Continuing the boxing training he had begun in Division would be the best way Birkhoff could stay active. That would give Michael and Nikita someone else to spar with, after all.
"Watch out, Mikey. I can totally kick your ass now," Readily accepting the invitation to fight Michael, mostly because his eyes and back were starting to hurt from staring at a screen all day, Birkhoff shot out of his chair and held up his fists. There was a chance he was being a bit too cocky, but he had some tricks up his sleeves. He could probably take down Michael if he tried hard enough.
Michael's smirk alone said otherwise, however, "Yeah. Okay, Nerd."
Not even two seconds on the sparring mat that the agents trained on, Michael had Birkhoff on the ground, tapping out. It was going to be a long boxing session for the nerd.
Having already been married, and having been a father to a little girl, Michael had long ago learned to simply accept his fate when something was gooped on his face, in his hair, and on his nails. He just went along with it, knowing it made his girls happy. Ten years later, he was back to accepting his fate with Nikita. She didn't often make him up (she did like to play with his hair). But when she did, it was always messy.
That night, after applying a moisturizing face mask on herself, she turned around and smeared it on Michael's face. He didn't fight her. He only asked that she cleaned up the mess she was making on the sink counter with the goop.
When she was done with him, he left the bathroom and continued what he had been doing in the livingroom. Birkhoff soon saw Michael's goop-covered face and began to make fun of him. Michael only shrugged. Nikita, however, emerged from the bathroom and planned to make Birkhoff eat his words.
She had the nerd pinned to the ground in record time. She then began to cover his face with the remaining goop. Birkhoff tried to fight her at first. He kicked and thrashed and shouted, all while Michael laughed. Eventually, though, Birkhoff just accepted that Nikita would always best him. So, he laid there and let her do what she wanted to his face- and soon his hair.
When Michael returned from taking out the trash, he heard fighting and screaming coming from the living room. Nikita, Alex, and Birkhoff were arguing loudly about something; judging by the sound of the TV channels changing, it had to be over the remote. Michael sighed. He was not in the mood for whatever insane antics the others were up to. He just wanted a quiet peaceful night without arguing or drama. So, as he made his way back into the house, he shouted, "Whoever's screaming, knock it off!"
Silence immediately followed. Michael smiled.
"Can you make your stir-fry?" After his stomach growled one too many times, Birkhoff asked Nikita to make dinner. He could honestly pop something fast in the microwave or oven, but he wanted a meal that'd last and actually be substantial. Nikita's stir-fry was the most delicious option he could think of. And once it was in his head, it was all his empty stomach could focus on.
"Ugh. Yeah. But you gotta be my sous chef," Nikita sighed as she agreed. She could go for a healthy, hearty, complete meal too. But she wasn't willing to do all that work by herself. At least one other person had to help her.
Although he had suggested the idea, Birkhoff didn't want to help cook. He grimaced at the thought, making Nikita roll her eyes and complain, "You expect me to make the veggies, rice, chicken, tofu, and sauce all by myself?"
"Fine. I'll do the rice and chicken," Birkhoff relented, yet only for the sake of his growling stomach. That was good enough for Nikita.
"And the others can clean up," Moving towards the kitchen, Nikita offered. It was only fair that after she and Birkhoff cooked, Michael and Alex cleaned. Everyone had to do their share in the safehouse, after all.
"Now you're talking," Laughing, Birkhoff was all for helping Nikita cook then- especially with how messy the two of them could make the kitchen.
After the dinner was prepared, there were tons of dirty dishes and utensils. Oil and food had splattered everywhere. And discarded food scraps were left on the counters. Rather than immediately tidying up what they could, Nikita and Birkhoff ignored it all. Their only focus was on the food, joking around, and planning to torture Michael and Alex. Each step was easier than the last. Eventually, everything was ready, and Nikita nodded in approval and satisfaction, "Can you tell the others the food is ready?"
Instead of actually going to get Michael and Alex from wherever they were and gather them into the kitchen, Birkhoff remained where he was and shouted, "Michael! Alex! Dinner!"
Nikita instantly glared at him, but his shout worked. Michael and Alex soon flooded the kitchen and excitedly grabbed for plates.
Michael and Nikita had disappeared from the chaos of the safehouse to go for a drive. That and walking along the beach were the closest they could get to privacy and some sort of date as rogue agents. Since they were able to spend time together in relative peace, they wouldn't complain. The two would simply make the best of the situation. Sometimes, that involved making out in the car or in the sand. Other times, it was getting dessert to share.
That night, when Nikita and Michael returned to the safehouse after driving around the town, they had an ice cream sundae to share. Nikita had thought they were going to eat it inside, so as Michael parked, she grabbed the takeout bag and unbuckled her seatbelt. She wasn't able to move far, however. Before she could get out of the car, Michael stopped her and took the bag from her hands, "Let's eat in here. The second the vultures spot food, we'll lose our dessert."
Rolling her eyes, Nikita wanted to say that Michael was overreacting. But then she remembered watching Alex kick and screech at Birkhoff when he had made a grab at her popcorn earlier that day.
Nikita took their sundae and some spoons and napkins out of the bag while Michael unbuckled his seatbelt. The couple continued their date, ate their dessert, talked, laughed, and made out in the car.
Alex hurried as fast as she could to Michael and Nikita's room. She thanked God that the door was open. She could run right in and make her demands. Hearing the shower running only slightly deterred her. She pounded on the door and silently begged it was the person she wanted on the other side of it, "Nikita, are you in there?"
"Yeah!" Nikita shouted in reply.
"Can I steal a tampon?" Sighing in relief, Alex asked. Although she had some clothes and some toiletries at the safehouse, she didn't have everything she needed to permanently stay there. Once she stole a tampon from Nikita, she could go to the store and remedy that situation. She wouldn't have any more close calls in ruining her underwear- or potentially ruining her sheets.
"Yeah!" Nikita shouted again, continuing to shower.
Alex assumed that Nikita was going to have her wait until she was done showering before she gave her a tampon. But Alex couldn't wait that long. She didn't want to ruin the few changes of clothes she had with her, and she hated the uncomfortable feeling of free bleeding. So, as Nikita continued her long shower, Alex picked the lock on the bathroom.
At the sound of her bathroom door opening, Nikita curiously poked her head out of the shower. The instant she saw Alex rummaging under her sink, she shrieked, "Did you just break in here? Get out!"
"I need a tampon now!" Alex shrieked back. Nikita sprayed her with water until she left, a tampon clutched in her hand.
Noticing that the door was slightly open, Alex barged into Michael and Nikita's room. They rolled their eyes at her entrance but ultimately ignored her as they continued making the bed. She collapsed on the mattress just as the comforter was straightened out and wondered, "Can I tell you about the weird dream I had?"
"Sure," Nikita shrugged, moving to place their discarded clothes into hampers. Michael, on the other hand, began to pile the pillows on top of Alex.
"So, I dreamt that when Percy told me that your fake dad was fake, he also told me that he was your real dad. And when I told you about it, you just curled up and died," Alex ignored the pillows Michael piled on her as she talked. She only shared the dream so she could set up for jokes she could tease Nikita with later. Otherwise, the dream wasn't anything worth mentioning. It certainly wasn't her weirdest, or scariest. For her, it just sort of seemed normal.
"Yeah. That'd be my reaction," Nikita scoffed, not wanting to think about the possibility of Percy being her biological father.
"I'd want to die too if I found out the woman I've been sleeping with is the spawn of Satan," Michael smirked. Whereas Alex laughed, glad someone else wanted to tease Nikita about the idea, Nikita grabbed a pillow off the bed and hit her boyfriend. He didn't hesitate before retaliating. The couple soon dissolve into a pillow fight full of lighthearted taunts and laughter. Alex watched cheerfully from her safe position on the mattress.
Her own taunts and laughter, however, soon turned the couple against her. With a glance at one another, Nikita and Michael focused their pillow attacks on Alex. She barely managed to slide off the bed and escape the room.
With Nikita sitting in front of him on the floor, and with the newspaper lacking anything interesting, Michael couldn't help himself. He cast aside the boring newspaper, sat up on the couch, and began to braid Nikita's hair. She hummed in contentment.
The couple was not left alone in that peaceful moment for long. As soon as Alex saw them, she excitedly hurried over and plopped down in front of Nikita. Although she didn't say a word, her desire was clear: she wanted her hair braided too. Nikita rolled her eyes, yet she soon did as Alex silently asked.
When Birkhoff soon walked by, he didn't say anything about the braiding train, but he did make a face at Alex. She stuck her tongue out in return. He made another face at her- that one more taunting- so she decided to pay him back in another way. Before Birkhoff could move too far, Alex pulled away from Nikita and wrestled him to the ground. The nerd tried to put up a fight, but just like with everyone else on the team, he easily lost. He was trapped in Alex's grip as she moved back to Nikita and had her hair re-braided.
The young woman then began to braid her captive's hair, adding the nerd to the braiding train. Birkhoff very quickly decided that he should stop fighting the girls on everything. His life would be easier- and full of less bruises- if he just caved like Michael did.
"Birkhoff! Alex! There's one donut left. Who wants it?" Fighting her laughter, Nikita called Birkhoff and Alex into the room. She had stretched Saran Wrap over the doorway, so when one of them tried to run in, they got snapped back. She had seen the prank on the Internet, and wondered if it'd actually work. Since Birkhoff and Alex were easy targets, and since she was annoyed with them for eating her leftovers (she didn't know which one was the real culprit, so she was punishing both of them), she decided to test it on them.
Only Birkhoff fell for the prank, though. Alex noticed something covering the door and stopped short. The hacker kept running until he slammed into the Saran Wrap. He fell on his ass, hard. The woman burst out into laughter.
It took Birkhoff a moment to realize what had happened. Yet, once he noticed the Saran Wrap, he sprung to his feet and chased after Nikita, "You're dead."
With her head start, she almost got away. But Birkhoff soon tripped on some wires, and as he stumbled, he reached out and accidentally pushed Nikita.
It really was an accident. Birkhoff hadn't meant to hurt Nikita. Yet when he had pushed her, she lost her balance. She pitched forward, and her lip smacked against the sharp edge of the couch. Blood instantly pooled in her mouth. Alex stopped laughing and gasped. Birkhoff hurriedly rushed to Nikita and helped stop the blood, "Ohmygod. Ohmygod. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It was an accident. I didn't mean it. I'm so sorry. Don't tell Michael."
Despite the pain, Nikita just laughed. She deserved the small injury for what she had done to Birkhoff, after all. Alex agreed, and laughed as she came over to help. It wasn't until it was clear that Nikita was alright before Birkhoff laughed. And once the blood was cleaned away, he worked on ways to pay her back for the Saran Wrap.
Nikita threw open Alex's bedroom door early in the morning, startling her awake. The young woman wished she had thought to lock the door the night before and whined at the intrusion, "Get out of my room!"
"Do you wanna go on a run?" Nikita asked simply. Alex looked at her with bleary eyes and noticed that she was dressed for a run along the beach. She probably hadn't been able to convince Michael to go with her. So, in her desire to not run alone, she turned to her best friend.
Alex wanted to say 'no' and go back to sleep. But the more she thought about running along the beach with her best friend, the more awake she felt. That actually sounded like a great way to start the day. Also, the two could talk and catch up on the things they had missed while they had been separated. Sitting up, Alex yawned, "Yeah. Sure."
An energy drink in one hand and a hot pocket in another, Birkhoff sat at his computer to finish his work. The second he tapped on his keyboard, however, he noticed that somebody had messed with his set-up. It was obvious who it was. Only one person kept changing his font to the ugliest settings. He sighed, "Knock it off, Princess, or I'll change the gate code on you again."
His warning didn't get a response. He believed that was the end of it then. But a second command on the keyboard triggered another one of Alex's tricks. Her voice, generated through the shell program Nikita had created, played loudly over Birkhoff's speakers, "Can you repeat the command?"
"Alex!" Birkhoff shot out of his chair to chase her down.
Nikita and Alex were hanging upside down from the back of the couch while they watched Michael teach Sean how to tie a bow tie. They mockingly repeated the instructions, somehow making fun of both men. Michael only rolled his eyes. Sean, however, eventually snapped, "You wouldn't be so smug if you were learning how to do this."
"My papa already taught me," Alex stated proudly. Her father had taught her how to tie all kinds of ties after she had once asked him about it. Like their time together in the forest, he used the simple lesson to teach her life lessons. Patience had been the key one then. Though, admittedly, she was still learning to practice that virtue.
"Amanda taught me," Nikita shrugged, not too proud about that fact. Amanda had taught her how to tie different ties so she could place bugs on seduction targets. She didn't want to think about that, though, so she didn't expand on her answer.
While Sean stared at the women in bewilderment, trying to understand their different reactions, Michael took pity on him, "It's okay. My dad only taught me how to tie regular ties too. Percy was the one who taught me how to tie a bow tie."
"How'd that go?" Nikita and Alex giggled. Percy had never been much of a teacher inside Division. Imagining him in that role was nearly impossible. Michael must've had a hell of a time trying to learn from that bastard.
"About as well as you'd suspect. But at least I didn't have a peanut gallery mocking me," Michael taunted the women. They both stuck their tongues out at him.
"So you had it easier," Sean smirked at Nikita and Alex. They made faces at him until he laughed. After he lightened up, learning to successfully tie a straight and neat bow tie became easier. He wouldn't thank the women for that, though. They couldn't have the satisfaction. If anyone ever said their jokes were a good thing, they'd never stop. And although it made them smile, it was so annoying at times. Not so much from Alex, but definitely Nikita.
Ryan was lost in thought as he peeled an orange over the sink. He hardly noticed anyone else in the kitchen with him. Until the orange in his hand squirted juice. Then, he heard Nikita chuckle, "Hey. Look at that. You got it to squirt. Most guys can't do that."
"Get out. Get out of my kitchen. I open my home to you, and this is how you repay me? No wonder Birkhoff calls you a gremlin. You're a menace to society. Go stand in the corner and think about what you've done," Once the innuendo clicked, Ryan ranted. Nikita only laughed at him. It took a minute, but he was soon laughing with her.
It was late, and Sean and Michael couldn't find Nikita and Alex. The two looked in their bedrooms, but neither were asleep in their beds. They then searched all over the safehouse. Eventually the men spotted the women asleep on the couch. Alex was laying on Nikita's lap while her feet were stretched out on the coffee table. It didn't look like either of them had intended on falling asleep; they simply couldn't fight their exhaustion anymore once they were finally resting and comfortable.
Once glance at each other, Sean and Michael decide not to wake the women. Neither wanted to interrupt their well-deserved sleep. And neither wanted to hear their sleepy grumbles and curses. So, silently, the men picked Nikita and Alex up off the couch.
Birkhoff happened to be walking past the room as Michael and Sean were struggling with Nikita's and Alex's sleep-heavy bodies. He immediately scoffed and smirked, "Don't forget to lift with your knees."
Although Sean and Michael rolled their eyes, they followed the advice. The Seal soon had Alex in a bridal carry, and she nuzzled against him in her sleep. The agent soon had Nikita wrapped around him, and she tightened her hold in her sleep. Gently, and still ensuring not to wake them, the men walked down the hall with the women. They ignored the snickers from Birkhoff as best they could. Except, he wasn't the only one willing to taunt the group. When Ryan spotted them, he snarked, "Man, I wish I had someone to carry me to bed."
Nikita had just woken up enough from the noise and jostling to flip him off over Michael's shoulder. Ryan and Birkhoff nearly choked on their barely contained snickers.
Whereas the rest of the team was being productive with their time, Sean and Alex were teasing each other for the things they had said and done when they had first met. She was much better at those kinds of jokes than he was. Though, she had more to tease him for. Even he had to admit that he had been an ass at times. Yet it wasn't entirely for the reasons Alex had believed, "I didn't hate you. I just…"
"Thought I was a traitor because I was a part of the rebel alliance?" Alex quipped with a bright smile. She knew that Sean didn't hate her. However, it was still fun to tease him for it. Especially since he was so quick to dispel any negative thoughts about her and praise her.
"Yes?" A bit confused, Sean replied. He knew Alex was quoting something, but he didn't exactly know what. Until he did, he wasn't sure how he should respond to her.
Alex had not expected Sean to be confused by her reference. It had seemed extremely fitting for the topic, and she thought it had made the most sense. But Sean's bewilderment was making her question things. Namely, she wondered if he had even seen Star Wars.
While Alex and Sean stared at one another, trying to read the other's mind, Nikita took the snippet of conversation she had heard and ran with it. Without stopping what she was doing, she did her best Princess Leia impression and began the quote Alex had used, "Darth Vader, only you could be so bold. The Imperial Senate will not sit still for this. When they hear you've attacked a diplomatic…"
"Don't act so surprised, Your Highness. You weren't on any mercy mission this time. Several transmissions were beamed to this ship by Rebel spies. I want to know what happened to the plans they sent you," Birkhoff continued the quote with a deadpan Darth Vader impression. He also didn't stop what he was doing. Neither he nor Nikita had to think too much about Star Wars to rattle off quotes. They had seen it enough times, and had quoted it enough times to each other, to not have to devote all their attention to recollection.
Birkhoff's and Nikita's nerdy back and forth pulled Alex's attention away from Sean for just a moment. She turned to Michael and asked around her giggles, "Is there any way we can turn them off?"
"When I figure it out, I'll tell you," Michael chuckled. Nikita and Birkhoff had been making movie, TV, and book references for as long as he had known them. That was just how they communicated. Though, he had a feeling that sometimes the two did it on purpose just to fuck with him.
Ignoring Michael and Alex, Nikita continued the quote. She had to get to the part Alex had said, "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm a member of the Imperial Senate on a diplomatic mission to Alderaan…"
"You are part of the Rebel Alliance and a traitor. Take her away!" Although Birkhoff's order was simply a quote, Michael decided to follow it. He picked Nikita up and threw her over his shoulder. She screamed in his ear, yet it had no effect. He carried her away while Alex, Birkhoff, and Ryan laughed.
Sean was the only one left still confused. It took him an extra few seconds to understand what had happened. Then, realization struck, "Oh. Star Wars."
"Have you never seen Star Wars?" Ryan asked, bewildered. Sean should've realized what movie Nikita and Birkhoff were quoting from the very first word. Even those who had never seen the movie knew Darth Vader was the bad guy in Star Wars. Where had Sean been the past few decades, living under a rock.
"Like once when I was a kid," Sean shrugged. He honestly never cared that much for the sci-fi, so most things about it escaped his mind. If he had remembered it, though, it definitely wouldn't have been like Birkhoff and Nikita. They took nerdiness to a new level, especially the hacker. He wasn't at all like that, "I'm not a nerd like them."
"You're right. You're just lame," Alex teased once more before joining Michael, who was spinning his girlfriend around, in messing with Nikita. Ryan decided to abandon his work too, and he joined Birkhoff in talking about Star Wars. Sean was left where he was, yet he was okay with that. He could then stare at Alex as she laughed and played around with a smile on his lips.
Nikita had started it. An old pop song came on the radio, causing her to jump around Michael and sing to him. He laughed at her antics, but he didn't stop what he was doing to join her. Alex, on the other hand, did. She quickly joined in on the silly dancing and singing, riling up Nikita's antics. When the two women then changed the music to only play old pop songs, Ryan couldn't help but nod his head to the beat and mouth along to the words. Eventually, Nikita broke Michael out of his shell, and he was dancing and singing with her. Birkhoff couldn't miss out on the fun after that. And neither could Sean once Alex dragged him into the silliness.
The team abandoned their work for the rest of the night as they danced and sang to old, familiar, favorite music. Laughter and fun filled the safehouse, lifting stress and anxiety off the rogues' soldiers. There was nothing to worry about for the moment. All they had to do was laugh and smile together. With each other around, that was easy.
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I love you all!
