Chapter 7
It was harder to say who enjoyed the glow worms more, Sophia or Tae. He had exclaimed a hushed wah when we walked around the corner of the cave and saw all the lights glowing on the walls and above our heads. Sophia had been warned she needed to stay quiet but she couldn't help herself.
"Oooo, is pretty mum," she'd said loudly, the cave going pitch black as all the lights flicked out in an instance from the loud noise, causing a whimper of fright. But it only took a few seconds as I knelt next to her and whispered quietly why that had happened before they started glowing again. From then on, she spoke in a soft voice, asking a few questions, holding tightly to my hand. My other hand was holding onto Tae's top, the hem twisted in my fingers as he was holding the phone that had lit the way to get us this far into the cave. Now extinguished so the glowing could be seen, it was too dark to make out more than a slight change in shadows to indicate he was standing next to me and we all stood close so as not to lose each other. Not that I was worried about that, the walk into the cave was short and the glow worm corner was at the end so there was only one way out.
"They're beautiful," Tae whispered in the direction of my ear and I nodded before laughing under my breath when I realised he couldn't see me.
"They are. It's kind of amazing that something so small can have a butt that glows with so much light."
He gave a quiet, low chuckle at my words, reaching to where my hand was attached to his top, covering it with his. "Thank you for bringing me here, I've never seen something like this before," he whispered.
"Even with all the places you've been?"
"We've definitely done amazing things but little things like this, nature, it always surprises me."
"I love how you see the world Tae, it makes me love things more when I see them through your eyes." I meant it, he had definitely opened up my world to enjoy even the little moments, treasuring each hour together when so much of our time would be spent apart in only a few short weeks.
"Mum? It's cold here," Sophia piped up quietly, her hushed whisper over exaggerated and causing some but not all of the glow worms to do whatever they did to switch off.
"It is, we're going now but it was beautiful wasn't it?" I could feel her body shake a little and realised she was just like me, nodding in the darkness where no-one could see. "I want one."
"You want a glow worm," I asked as we started walking out of the cave, Tae switching his torch back on to light the last of our way before the light from the cave entrance lit things up around us. "What about their families?"
"Family," she asked curiously, turning her head to look at me. "They have a Mum and a TaeTae?"
I swallowed at her words, seeing Tae smile with how she framed her question and included him in her family.
"Yes and a Nan and Grandad and cousins just like you do," I said with a smile at Tae who was watching me answer. "Their family loves them."
"They would be sad."
"Yes, if we took a glow worm home with us, they'd be sad. Shall we leave them all here together?"
"OK Mum. Now, one two three, weeeeeee," she said, clutching each of our hands and asking to be swung between us. And we counted, soaring her into the air all the way back to the van.
As we arrived at my parents house, I turned in my seat to face Tae. "Are you ready for another family dinner?"
"I was fine last time Marley and I'll be fine again. Your family is wonderful."
It made me warm to hear him say that. We were all close and I didn't know how I would've survived my last few years without them. "Abby did say she might be there," I continued with a frown.
He laughed as we unbuckled, helping to gather Sophia and the bag of things we had packed for her stay. "It would still be fine if she was there too. I know what to expect."
"Hmmmm, she has been on her best behaviour with you so far," I said, raising an eyebrow.
"You mean she can be... more?"
That caused a loud laugh as we walked up the path. "More? Oh, you have no idea," I said as we opened the front door, calling out our welcome as we walked inside.
It turned out that Abby could be restrained if she tried really hard to be and I'd whispered that she better in her ear when I hugged her hello, earning an eyeroll. The only time she was remotely over the top is when she produced a whole bunch of merchandise and asked Tae to sign it. He took her pen with a smile, happily doing that for her while I took her aside.
"Is it for other people? Just, please don't tell them about it until after he has returned to Korea. We are trying to keep things as low key as possible and avoid any confirmation that he is here at all."
"OK sis, I really do want you to have a great time. When does he go home then?"
"I don't want to say it out loud, then it's real," I pouted.
"Oh, you are sooooo in love," she said loudly, causing Tae to look up from where he was building things with Sophia on the floor of the lounge, grin spread across his features.
"You are so annoying," I replied, poking her in the side.
"Don't worry, he is too."
"You don't know him well enough to know that," I answered, playing with my fingers as I leaned against the kitchen counter. Despite how many times we'd said it to each other and how much I felt it when he was with me, I could still be insecure.
"OMG Marley. Anyone, I mean, anyone who looks at the two of you can tell. He is drawn to you constantly with his eyes and his body. He is just as in love as you are."
I blushed at her words, grateful she'd lowered her voice to say them.
"I'm not ready to think about how long we're going to have to be apart," I replied, chewing my lip.
"Don't think, just enjoy every moment of the next few weeks. And especially the next few days while it's just the two of you. You can be as loud as you want."
"Abby!"
"Marley," she replied with a smirk. "You know you can only keep silent for so long without wanting to hear him when he..."
"OK, OK," I interrupted. "I do not need you to give me a play by play of my love life thank you very much."
"Not of your love life, your sex life. And fair enough. But I'll be cheering you on," she grinned and we both dissolved into giggles, earning another glance from Tae.
"It's OK cutie, we were just discussing your 'plans'," she called out to him and he knew exactly what she meant, pursing his lips together to hold in his shy smile, cheeks a little pink.
"Sorry," I mouthed and he just raised his shoulders and shrugged before biting his lip. Because after all, lets be honest, Tae and I definitely had 'plans'.
When it was time to leave, we'd already tucked Sophia in bed, kissing her goodnight and letting her know we'd be back in a few days. She was excited, always spoilt by her grandparents and play dates lined up with preschool friends.
"You do know you could stay the night here rather than drive late," Mum was saying as she walked us to the door. "Your father and I don't mind you sharing a bed here. You're adults after all."
Tae choked a little on his words as he attempted to answer, still not completely used to how direct Westerners could sometimes be. "Ah, thank you, that's very kind. We have a campsite booked before we drive to our main stay the next day so we'll be fine."
"Drive safe then," she replied, kissing his cheek as she pulled him in for a hug which he gladly returned.
"We will Mum, thanks for dinner. The steak was great dad," I said, reaching to hug him too where he quietly stood next to mum. "Thanks again for having Sophia."
"Of course love, have a nice time away," he said, shaking Tae's hand with a firm handshake as Tae bowed a farewell.
"We will," Tae answered, then blushed a little at what his words could imply, quickly walking out the door.
"He's lovely isn't he," Mum said, following Tae with her eyes as he walked away.
"I think so," I said, a fond smile across my face.
"Oh you think he's more than lovely," Mum replied.
"I do, I really do. I love him."
"We know sweetheart and we're very happy for you," Dad said, reaching to take Mum's hand as she sniffled a little.
"I'm so glad Marley, you deserve someone as kind as he is."
"I don't feel like I do but since the universe seems to think so, I'll take it," and I waved as I walked back out to where Tae had started the campervan, ready to spend some time alone.
As we drove out of town, I snuggled in next to Tae, Sophia's carseat given to my parents for the next few days. It felt different to sit next to him when we were driving in the van. So far, Sophia had been between us for our trip, the only three seats in the vehicle. But I was able to slide next to him on the bench seat, relishing the contact as our legs bumped together while we headed away from the lights of the city towards our overnight camping spot.
"I do really like your family," Tae spoke into the darkening vehicle. The Summer sun wasn't fully down yet but twilight was on the way, sky beginning to change colour.
"I'm sorry about Abby," I laughed, thinking about how I adored her but how crazy she sometimes was.
He laughed, his low tone vibrating against the seat. "No, no, I like her too."
"Oh do you," I asked, raising my eyebrow as I looked at him, teasing. He quickly glanced back at me.
"Not like that! You know that right? That I don't think of anyone else but you?"
I warmed at his words, attaching myself to his side, careful to not interfere with his driving but wanting to be closer. When he said things like that I couldn't help but feel cherished.
"Marley, you know that?" He asked again because I hadn't answered, too content in my own thoughts of him.
"Mmmmhhhmmm," I said drowsily, "I know oppa, saranghae."
"Good," he replied, turning to quickly place a kiss on my cheek before looking back at the road. He was silent for a while, a comfortable quiet as we travelled and I soaked up being next to him, trying to get it to stick to my skin for when we would be apart again. The sun was setting now and the horizon was full of different shades of orange as we continued to head towards it.
After a little bit, he spoke again. "Ah, am I the only one you think of like that?" He sounded a little shy and I pulled away from his side to answer, looking at him.
"Tae, you don't know that already? There's only you."
"I mean, I'd understand if you still think about Matty." His voice trailed away and he sounded a little vulnerable but also understanding.
I exhaled a little, not wanting to hurt him with anything I said, taking my time before answering. "Since I met you, things have changed for me. Matty was all I could think of back then. Just getting through each day and taking care of Sophia. Now, you are on my mind all the time. I don't think of another man the way I think of you. Yes, I sometimes think of Matty but even if something reminds me of him, it's not the same. Our love is different Tae, I'm fully in this with you. And I'm never, not ever, not once, thinking of another man when I'm in bed with you."
His smile was small as I watched him listen to my words, nodding so I'd know he understood.
"I've never thought of anyone when I'm in bed with you either," he said, making sure we both knew where we stood. "Or van. Or couch. Or floor. Or shower. Or,"
"OK, OK, I get it," I laughed, stopping him as my insides fluttered at all the little reminders. Not that I needed the reminders. I felt like every time we were together had been etched in my mind as well as on my body.
He was quiet for about another minute then looked sideways at me again. "How long until our campsite?"
"Hmmm, about 45 minutes," I answered, in charge of the GPS. We'd booked in a small park, about halfway to our glamping spot.
"Marley?"
"Yes?"
"I don't want to camp there," he said, words a little forceful and I looked at him, confused at his tone.
"At the place we booked for tonight? That's OK, we can go somewhere else. We only booked there as it looked private,"
"Yes, let's go somewhere else."
"What are you wanting? Somewhere with showers? I know that one was pretty much just a place to stop."
"I don't mind, let's just stop soon."
"Soon," I questioned, we'd only been on the road for an hour, I didn't think he was tired. "Like, how soon?"
"Marley, I want to stop now."
"Now? Are you not feeling well? I can take over driving if you want to sleep?"
"Marley. I definitely don't want to sleep. I want to go into the back of the van with you and remind each other one of the reasons we enjoy being alone," he said, spelling it out for me, tone now very clear as my body fizzed in response.
"Ah," I said, "soon then."
"Soon. Now. A few minutes ago. Can you tell I'm ready for you?"
I avoided looking at his face, knowing it would make me blush. Instead I busied myself on the phone, looking for a place to stop. "There's a small park about 2 minutes away. It's not a camping site but we could stop there, if you wanted? We could always go on to our other campsite, after?" I felt a little embarrassed saying 'after', it meant admitting I knew what we were going to do. Which was stupid since it was far from our first time. But it still made me a little shy from time to time to feel this way about him and to know we both wanted each other enough to stop on what was practically the side of the road.
"As long as you don't mind getting there late. I'm not planning on this being quick," he answered and I swallowed, this time allowing myself to look at him. His side profile was spectacular, just like the rest of him but he glanced away from the road briefly and his eyes were intense, tongue pushing out from his teeth.
"Late is good. Slow is good," I replied, feeling the fizzing flood through me at the thought of being alone for the first time in weeks. "Take this next turn on the left," I said to him quietly and we turned off the highway, pulling into the park.
The engine had barely stopped, hand break yanked on when we were reaching for each other, sighing into the embrace as our lips hit and my body melted into his. "Where did this come from suddenly," I asked as we pulled apart.
"Not suddenly. I always feel like this," he answered, stroking my hair, twisting it's length into his fingers.
"Not always."
"I mean it, always. I'm just used to having to hide things. But tonight, no-one is around and I can be as open as I want. And as loud," he finished, winking at me as he opened the van door and we hopped out, going round to the sliding one on the side. Just before opening it, he pressed me against the van, finding my mouth again, urgency in his touches and I gave him everything I had, returning it all to him with just as much desire as I could feel coming off his lips. Then the door was pulled open and we clambered inside, falling onto the bed as he slid the door closed behind him.
My conversation with Abby came flooding back to me as our clothes started to come off. Now we could be as loud as we wanted in this moment and I was definitely soooooo in love. And then I definitely wasn't thinking about my sister anymore or anyone else as we rolled over onto the bed, Tae gazing down at me as he settled above me.
"Jagiya, tell me again who you're thinking of when we're together," he said softly as he nibbled at my throat.
"Just you Tae, only you," his name never leaving my lips as we showed each other, with our bodies, how strongly we felt.
