A/N - I've been wanting to do a Tae POV chapter about how he's feeling and now felt right. Enjoy the double update :)
Tae POV
Sometimes I just sat back and watched her, watched them. Like now when I was 'working on lyrics' but instead I had tucked myself into a place where I could look out the campervan window and just watch. Marley was bare foot, chasing Sophia across the grass in yet another quiet, park like setting that was what I'd come to love about New Zealand. One of the many things that had won my heart about this country. But mostly I loved it because it gave me Marley.
As I watched her now, I caught the wind ruffling the wrap she had secured around her waist. We'd been swimming an hour ago, coming out of the water to towel dry but mostly let the sun and the warm Summer air work their magic. Marley had wrapped herself in a cloth skirt that left a split up the side and her leg appeared as she ran. I watched its golden length, tanned from our trip and marvelled again at how lucky I was.
Freckles had begun to appear across her face and chest. She was fair and they came up everywhere the sun kissed her skin. I was fascinated by them, lightly tracing them with my fingers when we were lying together, talking. I'm sure she thought it was random, my finger just moving across her body but it was intentional. I was tracing out the constellations, her freckles the galaxy that I was captivated by.
We'd been on the road for about six weeks and I didn't want to think about the last few, knowing how fast they would fly by. We had been to so many beautiful places, made so many memories to hold onto while we were apart and I had really seen her. All the sides of her. The days without a good shower when her hair was all over the place, the middle of the night wake ups at the start while Sophia was getting used to sleeping in the campervan. The way she travelled with her legs up on the dashboard when we drove between places, relaxed and expectant for the next adventure. She was a different person to when we'd met, the shadow of her sadness banished for most of the time rather than sitting just below the surface to cloud her joy.
And I loved her. I loved the woman she was showing me, the mother I could see, the wife I could imagine. I loved her in the morning when she needed a coffee to wake up even though neither of us drunk it. In the afternoon when she was screwing up her face while she thought about what we would cook for dinner. And maybe I loved her in a different way at night time when we could take the time to learn new ways our bodies could enjoy each other.
The intimacy was unlike anything I'd had in a previous relationship and I understood now how real love changed being together. The pleasure was different when all I wanted was to make her happy. That transferred into the bedroom and what she gave me in return was explosive. We weren't always intimate once Sophia was asleep, the desperation from the short trips in our early days together having been satisfied now that we had these much longer 2 months without having to part. But it was usually because we'd been busy all day, falling into bed and asleep within minutes. And inevitably, one of us would wake the other the next morning if we woke before Sophia and make up for what we hadn't been able to do the night before. But at the very least, just being able to spoon her, rest my hand on her tummy while we slept, kiss her neck nuzzling into her collarbone and it not have to lead anywhere was something new to me. We had built a level of trust that we could just read what each other needed and it was better than I could've imagined to belong to someone in that way. We touched constantly, not able to can't help ourselves, it just came naturally. My love language was very satisfied. And even though I was clingy when I sleep, she doesn't mind, often waking up overheating in the warm Summer nights.
Marley was effortless, she didn't care about how she looked most of the time, beautiful barefaced with no makeup on which was her normal look and she still seemed surprised when she looked at me and caused a reaction. Clearly she didn't see what I did and I tried to tell her everyday how much she meant to me and how attracted I was to all parts of her.
When she dressed up she was gorgeous but I got to wake up to her each morning while we travelled and that was my favourite look. It wasn't often that I woke first but when I did and realised she was still sleeping I focused on all the small details. Her eyelashes were so long, normally framing the eyes which I loved so much, from the first day, never having seen that shade before. And when she finally did wake, stretching her body, her hair messy from sleep, those eyes blinking open, I melted every time. That was definitely one of my favourite moments because the reason her hair was messy was usually me and the smile when her eyes hit mine for the first time each day gripped my heart.
She wasn't perfect. There was a look in her eyes sometimes when she was mad at me about something I'd said and it could wither anyone in its path. It was usually about money, since she was so fiercely independent. But I'm sure she had found my imperfections too and still loved me through them. Jealousy being one of them. The time she had been approached in a bar still made me seethe when I thought about it. Of course, she had handled it just fine without me but I had wanted to come over and claim her as mine, my jealousy well and truly flaring up before her light touches had calmed me. It was silly but it was who I was and I didn't like that I couldn't properly tell the world we were together.
I loved the way she talks to all the shop assistants. When I asked her why it was more than just a hello at the start and a thank you at the end, she had said that even if a small conversation can lift someones day, why not. She knows I can't engage in that way with people as it may draw attention to myself but I enjoy quietly watching her do it instead. She was definitely a good girl, returning the supermarket cart rather than abandoning it near where we parked the van. But I also loved when she wasn't a good girl too, that part of her persona made me smile. A lot.
It wasn't just shop assistants she talked to. When we ran into tourists in camping areas, she would often chat to them, sometimes in their own language. It had been a nice surprise to see how she could hold a fairly long conversation in French and German and had a smattering of Japanese as well, giving me a chance to practice all those with her. I taught her new words in Korean and she educated me on some very interesting English phrases which I teased her with when I could. Just thinking about that made me smile. She picked things up quickly, not just language but things about me, often without me saying anything. We were teaching each other so much, this time together helping to put all the pieces into place until we slotted perfectly.
There was an app on her phone that chimed daily to remind her to do her Korean lessons. She thought my English accent was cute but I was captivated as I listen to her Korean growing as she attempted to learn it for me. I knew she found it difficult but she never missed a day even if it was just for five minutes and she was better than she gave herself credit for, asking me to practice with her so she could get the phrasing right. When I looked into the future, I could see that we would be able to settle in either of our countries and be content, at least I hoped that was the case as I couldn't picture us not being together.
I closed my notebook where I had written a little, the basics of a few songs having been sketched out to add to the collection of songs that had invaded my soul since I met Marley. I'd had enough of watching, I wanted to join in and build some more core moments between us all. Because that was what was important to me. Not the money, the fame or everything that came with it. But the connections I had with my family and friends and now the ones I was constantly building with my lover. Every tiny, seemingly insignificant moment.
I had learnt that love didn't just come in the whirlwind of romance or the fire of pleasure. It came in the whisper, the small moments, the lightest touch, the trust we'd built. And I was so ready for the time when being apart was over for good and we could continue this into our future.
Climbing down the step of the campervan and walking towards her, I saw the smile light her face when she saw me, slowing her running to a walk, Sophia hurtling her body at mine to be picked up. Slightly out of breath, cheeks warm from the exercise and the gorgeous day, Marley looked radiant and as we arrived at the same place, she peeked a light kiss on my cheek, reminding me that she was my home and my heart was full.
