Nobility is a nicer curse.
Liquor was poured into clear glasses, thick rims placed on a great wooden desk, the clear air inside replaced with a rich brown that blended in with the hues of sunrise.
Minato hadn't realised it had taken that long for Takai to recount his life, but at least he had been thorough, and though he appreciated the long descriptions and explanations. It gave a bit of excitement to an otherwise boring part of his job. He somewhat regretted letting Takai go, but then he thought on it more. It was hard to imagine that his tough love hadn't led to the man in front of him. Would that small, meek and shy kid really have become a blood letting mass murderer? It was hard to say.
And to add to conflicting thoughts, though he appreciated the report's length, it was still much too undetailed. One could say, as with many other things, that time corrupts memories and that was enough of a reason to lose the details that otherwise would have ran rampant on the tale he was weaving. Takai, like any other soldier, was meant to deliver the facts. Conjecture wasn't needed, but the idea that there were hidden lies and untruths hidden in the truth dug into him like an earworm. It was a result of his lack of power in this situation, really. He simply had underestimated the village.
If Takai wasn't lying that was. Minato didn't like to doubt himself too much though. Jiraiya had taught him at a young age that excessive overthinking left a man dead, and though he had to think a whole lot more now then when he was 12, surrendering to paranoia was still a danger. He trusted his senses, and Takai had only lied a few times to him. Considering it was all selfish shit, he trusted him somewhat, but not completely. Despite that, Minato valued that. He would rather have a somewhat loyal thinker, than a completely loyal thrall.
Mutual respect was the feeling they had between each other, Minato thought, as both him and his new companion sipped strong alcohol. The liquid went down with an ashy burn, bringing Minato back to the present, yet reminding him of the fire that Takai himself had walked from.
"Drinking from the Hokage's stash. Honestly, I didn't think you were a drinker."
"Call it a hand me down from the Hokage previous. Hashirama drank as much as he gambled, whilst Tobirama was less of an addict and more of an auteur. He made his own drink under a pseudonym, all throughout his youth and beyond. When he died his direct descendants inherited a bottle each. That doesn't sound too impressive until you consider the fact that Tobirama sired so many bastards, whom he considered partially his heirs, that now white hair colour is considered to be rare, yet not unfound in Fire country."
Takai had a wide smile on his face as he continued from Minato's story.
"Yes, and Sarutobi needs no explanation. I heard he once outdrank every other kage at the peace summons at the end of the second shinobi war, despite being smaller than every single one."
"Hm, a legend in so many ways."
Takai laughed, cheery yet mischievous, like how Minato found many of his laughs to be.
"Stop talking about him like he's dead. You've taken the hat from him, not his life."
And that was just enough for the honourable hokage to burst out laughing, genuine smile and closed eyes and all. Takai chuckled with him, enjoying the company.
The two continued sipping and joking, epithets from Minato's early life contrasted with Takai's experiences over the last 2 years.
Minato interrupted again with a question, his empty glass doing nothing to cloud his personal judgement.
"Why do you only talk about Takigami? If I didn't know you better, I would think you were born 2 years ago when you first walked in the city gates."
Takai looked down, face introspective. He downed the rest of his glass in one gulp, slammed to down, and spoke.
"It is similar to why I don't speak about my previous life, before I was reborn here. Because it doesn't matter. I wouldn't recognize the old me, and he wouldn't recognize me. Too much has happened and too much has changed. I don't look at the past with nostalgia but rather confusion, like the memories were stolen from another man, actions I would never repeat, fears I no longer possess.
Some part of me envies you. You weren't born a soldier, but you were made into one from young, and you barely had to change. Me however, lost so much of this life and the other, because I wasn't prepared. The only thing that presently matters is what you are now, and if you lost development, if you couldn't make yourself better because of your past weakness, then why would you even care about it? The only thing I can impart from that kind of mistake is making myself stronger, less foolish, less weak. Then imagine a life of those kind of mistakes. You would rather forget them all after it, toss them aside like the nothing they are."
Minato shook his head, denial on his tongue like the liquid gold from moments before.
"No, the past is what makes us strong, it is what defines us. Without a past, what are we? You say I didn't have to change much, and as true as that may be, I still had to change. I lost people too, before I could defend them, and that made me motivated to protect my loved ones."
"Maybe, but soon you will forget their names. You don't spend your time in the past, you aren't strengthened by it, you were, and now those hellish times, the losses will become nothing but tatters lost in the wind. The Minato of then, before you were a war hero, before you were hokage, is dead.
It is only the last arc of your life that matters. Everything else is worthless."
"And will the rest of your life make this part of it pointless?"
"No. This is the last arc of my life, and it will never leave me. If something changes your life so, you will never truly move on."
Minato leant over his desk, eyes solemn and empty glass long forgotten.
"Then what happened."
Takai smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes.
"I am glad you asked."
…
My wager worked. I had managed to stake a claim in the limited amount of land near every noble held and vied over, and all it took was an engagement. Of course, I wasn't unhappy to be married to a beautiful woman I loved. If any other man was in my situation, well first I would have gutted them out of jealously, but secondly, for their short time remaining they would have been happier than any other person in the godsforsaken village of takigami.
Life was interesting for a time. I thought of telling her I was a ninja, but the idea was dangerous for her as much as it was for me. Telling her would probably kill her if she went to anyone else, and it would be hard to predict what she would do. A part of me hoped, knew, that she would accept it without question, but doubts surface quicker with the uplifting power of love, and she had lots of it. Lust too.
We ate, we laughed, we kissed, we made love. It was picturesque.
But eventually I healed and I had to do my work. She knew it was illicit, yet how illicit she didn't know.
Ken had survived, but Jan was wounded, grievously. I paid for his recovery but he would never fight again. Ken kept fighting though, kept training and kept meeting up with me. It was almost like his brother lost the will to fight and gave it to Ken. He made progress upon progress, and some part of me was scared of that. He had the build for a fighter to be sure, one that both shinobi and samurai would shirk. Imagining a ninja larger than Jiraiya with a millionth the skills was a disaster, yet he didn't need to be the same level as a ninja. I gave him scrolls of my own make, to make him better and better, even teaching him how to use chakra to enhance his attacks (His control was pathetic and his reserves worst but he was able to use it to great effect still). A ninja would still kill him in seconds, but he was an excellent distraction.
Megane was loyal as long as he had money, which I gave in swaths. If there was a competitor, I would take them out and he wouldn't ask any questions. He would see the money rolling in, and that would silence his suspicions. A good ally knows when to shut up, and he was silent most of the time we met.
The rest of my operations would go swimmingly, with no disruptions whatsoever. Money rolled in and the only reason Nezu didn't spend it all whoring and drinking is the paranoia that someone would kill him in his drug fuelled celebrations. I didn't have that problem. A rich man was expected to have money, and every noble was rich, so buying expensive clothing or expensive meals wasn't an issue.
I used shadow clones for most of the meetings. I needed one to sneak out to give me an alibi. Stone would be watching even closer. The only reason they hadn't attacked was because of collateral and discovery. I couldn't escape, yet this city would spread Iwa's hidden reign or at least a facsimile of it if Iwa dared attack me in the open, and I would be able to kill an upperclassman or 2 and summon the Fire nation's courts if they tried. That would jeopardize their entire operation, and so we were at a standoff.
Good.
The rat king was loyal by fear, which wasn't a good form of loyalty if you wanted them to work for you without constant threat. I would have to tell him every time a body needed to be moved, which was easy with the shadow clone, but if he was a friend instead he would have ordered his rats to do it free of charge. He gave me intel, but nothing incredibly useful.
…
One day, me and Aka were invited to a gala, at the richest and most prestigious family's manor. The Gareki's. They were on my radar, but I saw no reason to refuse. It wouldn't do me any harm either way. For all they knew my feelings for Aka were fake and taking her captive or killing her would do nothing to me, whilst they would lose about 20 people before they took me down if they were lucky. My biggest disadvantage is I didn't know who they were, whilst they knew me, which is probably the most dangerous thing for a shinobi.
But I would never find out if I didn't try.
…
The manor itself was massive, the stainless-steel gates, which I knew were cold even without touching, opened to a massive garden, which stretched across up to a large traditional mansion, deep red wood contrasted with red ceramic walls, yet lights dangling from near every artifice giving the effect of a city of lamps, floating in water. The night sky seemed to breath above with the cool air around us, the wisps of ice beaten out by the flame lanterns affixed everywhere.
Dotted around were statues, stone things ranging from ugly beasts roaring to beautiful women dancing. Spirits and humans and weather and stone, each engraved with a name, a Gareki author. 2 were unfinished, one half built from the hip, and another's shape carved but the details not quite in place, making a grotesque featureless blob of drab grey-green rock.
Guards stood, tall and threatening, and though I dared not push my senses far, I knew that they had chakra, and good amounts, similar to that of a jonin. It wasn't unheard of to see missing nin in great renown hired to protect nobles, but a family this noble and this many shinobi? It was clear they were stone, and I was closer than ever to the kingpin.
It was actually the birthday 18th of Gareki Kurai, the last remaining member of the house. We, like everyone else, had been invited to eat his food, sing his praises, and perhaps offer a present. Ours was a necklace, golden yet tight, like a choker.
My dress was irrelevant aside from its immaculateness, yet Aka was somehow more perfect than usual, dark vines spreading through a burgundy background on her free-flowing dress. In my completely humble opinion, we managed to blow everyone out of the water.
We entered the manor, eyes blinded for a moment as the bright flash of a room filled with somehow even more light than before stunned us, the attention to the city's love for light even more evident in what was, in effect, its masters. A great, bright, silver chandelier hung above, casting even more light on the white marble below, of which scatterings of couples and families and servants shuffling, conversation and rumours afloat.
"Reminds me of when we first met." I said, and Aka responded with a smile and not much else.
We moved across the natural ravines formed across any crowd, small groupings of people forming well before we arrived. I wore a smile, but I was rankled. How many of these people had seen what I had seen, gone through what I had gone through? And they lived in more luxury than I. Deservedness is an idiotic idea though. The world is not built upon deservedness, but rather power. Ironic then, that though I had more power than most everyone in this room I couldn't use it.
Aka pulled me to a group of people, introducing me to the Gareki heir.
"It is a pleasure to meet you."
The boy (And I call him a boy because he was a boy, despite his age) in front of me gave a smile, but I could tell it wasn't truthful. We were both 18 yet he was half the man, in stature and nearly size. I had grown to 6 feet, tall in both the shinobi world and civilian, yet he was shorter, 5 and a half perhaps, and where my body was thick, barbed and filled with muscle, his was lithe and thin, his frail figure seen even through the white fabric.
"And you too, I hope you enjoy my party, I spared not a single detail when preparing it."
Somehow I doubted he actually organised the entire party himself, his entourage of guards and flatterers playing to the apparent narrative of a spoilt brat.
Maybe that was the ploy though, I thought. A kingpin who managed to stay undetected by acting the fool.
But then I saw him, tanned dark skin and a black beard, stalking towards me with a devilish smile and menacing eyes. He had a sharp face, masculine, and I could tell even beneath his white robes he had lithe cord muscle stretching over his frame. He must have been 30, 40, but he had the energy of a man half his age.
"Ah, Takai, I have heard of you. Forgive me, Ms, but I must steal your future husband away for a retreat." He had a tongue of silver serpent silver, and golden earrings that jostled with his small, flowing yet purposeful movements.
I followed as we joined a group of what seemed like cloned partygoers, which slowly revealed themselves to my trained eye to be shinobi as well, their clothes clearly a uniform and their builds better than most of the party, filled with thin women starving themselves for vanity, and portly men gorging themselves on treats and platters of waiter held food.
We joined the group, and fell into a small silence for moments, before the man played his hand.
"My name is Seidou. I am the regent for the head of this house. I am also, as it transpires, head of Iwa operations in this area."
On cue, every man in the gathering unsheathed a knife, though none of them moved to attack me.
"I have an offer for you." He said, with a silky smooth tone, and a devious grin. I responded with a grimace, my opinion of this situation going down heavily. I did not like this man. Him being Iwa was part of it, but his way around people and words was unnerving. In one move, he had cornered me. But not really. It was a show of strength but it meant little. Unless all of these men were jonin, it would be a repeat of what happened to my pursuers, except in close proximity with the most influential people in the village. He was willing to sacrifice everything just to validate his prediction, that I wanted to continue playing this game of his. That I was smart enough, self-preserving enough, to listen.
"We know, you and me, that nobody is coming to save you. Konoha doesn't even know you're here, or has at least forgotten. You can't escape, we would catch you. In effect, you have nothing but yourself, and your spy network. What I want, is for you to swear fealty to me, and in return, I will not kill you."
My frown picked up a bit, then turned into a small grin, and then a full smile, as I laughed to myself. His own face grew serious in contrast to my own change. I responded, still smiling.
"You are a fool if you think I will swear fealty to you. I may have been abandoned by Leaf, I may have no way out, but I will keep my freedom, even if I have to work for you."
I wanted to draw a line. I love the Leaf, truly, but I would have to pretend my loyalties were to myself. It would make me seem predictable and controllable, yet dangerous, If I swore fealty to keep up appearances, I would have to do almost everything he says, and eventually he would out manoeuvre me and get me killed if I ever did anything against him. I needed him to assume I wanted only things for myself, and so he would keep thinking I'm a threat. So I made myself his partner, not his servant.
"Well, I amend my statement. I apologise for not knowing who I was speaking to. I offer you then, a job. To continue as you are, but to stop killing us, and to give us information not concerning you. If you do that, I swear I will not let you get killed by my men."
A promise from a shinobi rarely meant anything unless it was made from love, and even then some strayed from their partners. But I knew he would keep it, as he knew I would.
He continued.
"Now I may be presumptuous in this, but I assume that even if I asked you for information on your home, you wouldn't have any. You were only a tokubestu before you left, and your lack of resources tells me this was meant to be a mission that got your career killed. Your Hokage sent you here because he considered you incompetent, and as such wanted your last mission to be a year or two stint here, where when he checks up again you will have gained nothing or ran away and been hunted down by his hunter-nin."
Interesting how he knew about me before, but it wasn't that hard to believe Iwa still had a spy, and you didn't need to be high ranking to know somebody like me.
"That is true, you are as perceptive as ever."
"It is my best trait."
I nodded, keeping up the ruse that I wasn't being held at bladepoint.
"I accept then. Here, is to a foreseeable partnership."
I mimicked holding up an empty glass, whilst the group I was in stared at me, unimpressed.
"Ah well."
Me and Seidou walked some steps across the bustling ballroom floor, until I spied Aka, and the heir near one another.
"Correct me if I'm mistaken, but you seem to not be the type to let a boy control this house when you could use its resources for yourself."
"Boy? You are the same age as he is."
"We both know shinobi grow quicker."
"True. Very well, I do desire the control. The money and power this house gives is valuable, but for generations this family has pledged both bastards and funds to the Iwa cause. The issue with his brother, and do not act surprised because I knew this you suspected, was that he wanted his house to expand more into fire than earth. That makes political sense if ninja were common bandits, but we are not common bandits. I told his brother he was to take up the manor if he pledged to me, and as such the older brother died and the younger brother lived. You may call him a boy, but know that he is much more dangerous than you would expect from his frail figure and dulled senses."
I looked at him better, attempting to sell the change of a friendship of sorts building. It would work well to think I was loyal if his idea of me considered him a friend, and he had already seen my folly with Nezu. It wasn't hard to conclude I had a flaw rather than had made a mistake.
"I see that. Civilians can be just as dangerous and bewitching as ninja, yet he is still a boy. He has never bloodied his hands, and he never will. He will stay weak of body and mind, and use guile as a clutch rather than a tool. Answer me this; if a Genin killed your kage or mine with the luck of a stray kunai, would you think them as equal to those star born giants?"
He closed his eyes in thought as he smiled, trying to earn that friendship.
"Poetic, and correct. I agree with your wisdom, but I have seen him grow as you haven't, and believe me, he was a hellion as a child."
I would like to say my laugh was a lie too, but it was genuine.
We talked and drank and ate and danced, me and Aka and the boy and the man, until we were satisfied, and went home to sleep.
…
Without the overriding threat of Iwa, you might have thought I would have put the gang back together over the next few months, but it worked better to have them separated in order to avoid the possibility of Iwa out manoeuvring me. They had also grown into their roles well. The mercenaries ended up making a lot of money, Megane had been studious as ever, and my normal trades has been prosperous. I was at the point where even though I had married into nobility I would have earned it nonetheless.
Not much happened aside from the comings and goings of my spy work. I would sell and earn information, facilitate trades, and more, but the overbearing eye of Iwa always threatened me. I needed them dead, but I was too weak to escape.
And Aka.
I couldn't leave her, I understood. I am and was loyal to the Leaf, but I loved her and I couldn't save both her and myself. She would die if I tried to get her out, and I didn't want to leave her. It was selfish, but I needed it more than anything else.
So for the next few months, I trained and worked and planned and planned. I was working from a desk as often as I was exercising, and I was meeting allies as often as meeting enemies. The boy had become more acquainted with me over time, yet it felt like we were worlds apart. He had a life of luxury, any woman that offered he had the pick of all the foods from Fire he could want, yet he didn't seem to do anything with it. His family had a long tradition of creating a handcrafted stone statue of whatever they wanted, their lineage's lifework scattered across the manor's front garden.
The boy's had hardly been worked on, smooth rock with scant chips made by bare arms, whilst his brother's was demolished, the top half taken off leaving only the legs. Clearly the younger's disdain for the older went further than just murder.
Sometimes it didn't occur to me how different the worlds of civilian were from ninja, such that murder was a taboo concept to the minds of the weak. Weak in body, rather than mind, though ninja on average were more educated, better prepared. Yet we died younger. Anyways, shinobi, at least the smart ones, always suspect their neighbours, unless a betrayal is unthinkable (blood ties and marriage are often seen as guarantees, but you know more than I do, that that isn't true), yet a civilian couldn't imagine someone in their village, small and compact and everyone knowing everyone else's name, killing another. It is so far out of their minds they can't deal with it in most cases, whilst we ninja are desensitised. Well, that is until you cared about them.
Either way it spoke to his character, his mental strength and cunning if he was able to do such a thing, but he was a pawn. Seidou could have trained him and his brother in the ninja arts. They may not have excelled, but they would have been able to defend themselves. Of course, he didn't want that. They needed to be easy to control, to spot, to keep.
And the depths of this conspiracy. As Nezu said (I am paraphrasing forgive me) You would need to burn the entire city to its foundations to get rid of the Iwa rot that infected it.
I wonder if it is still burning even now.
Months passed with me getting stronger and Iwa doing more and more.
Yet time was running out, and I would need to escape before my 2-year time limit was up. I feared you a bit, but I didn't want to violate your trust. I needed you on my side for me to get back to the Leaf. A plan was filling out in my head, but it was occupied by the comings and goings of my occupation, and the curves and laughs of my partner.
One day, whilst caressing her soft cheek, laying aside her in bed, I thought how new this feeling was. I had never felt this before, this beating skipping in my heart, the drums thumping loud in my ears as I looked at her, my want, my need to have her in every way possible. I was obsessed I realised. Half the time I kept a clone with her, but I soon switched it out to spend more time with her. If I could have, I would have looked at her beautiful face for the rest of time. She was a drug, and I needed her more than anything else, I would have lived the rest of my life loving her, her laugh, her smile, her body. Her.
…
"What is your opinion on my Kage?"
It was a weird question for him to ask and yet I considered that perhaps Seidou, more than anything, wondered about the perception others had. It might have been the reason behind his success. I tend, and tended, to imagine what a person was thinking, to put myself in their head and predict based on that, yet he took a different approach. He found things out, important and otherwise, verified its truth, and added it to his web of information. Told lies and learnt truths, plans and agreements and shook hands and shook fists, love and hate. He took it all into a big web of knowledge, so vast and verified that he knew nearly all that went on in, what was in effect, his city. It spoke to his confidence in his skills, or arrogance, that he put stock in his information, as all his truth was based upon other things he thought were true. All he would need is one mistake to ruin it.
Yet it was too risky. Sure I could disperse false information, but if he had a trap card, something that could snag me in case of a betrayal, or a fault in my method, he would come for me, and I wasn't strong enough then. I needed to lay low more than anything, and maybe I was getting complacent.
Either way, my answer.
"I don't think too much about him, honestly. He wasn't that active during the last war, and though his power is legendary, I haven't seen it for myself."
"Well he is not only strong, but a wise man too. We would have won the last war based purely on his battle senses if-"
"Not for the yellow flash, I know."
I doubted his claims though, the third was at least his equal, and though near the end iwa had gained more and more ground, they ravaged the lands they left behind. Even if they kept it, they wouldn't have been able to use it for decades, crippling them even if they won. A pyrrhic victory.
"Your young and new Kage hmm? The man who effectively banished you, what do you think of him?"
A hard question of course.
"He is an excellent shinobi, a good fighter, strategist and more. He is also the Leaf's premiere sealmaster, which means a lot. He is invaluable for Konoha."
"That is a report, not an opinion. Do you resent him?"
I hesitated.
"Somewhat. I do not hate him, I would have done the same in his position but that doesn't mean I don't dislike that he did it. My home, my safety was taken away from me because he didn't trust me to be a good shinobi, and that hurts, at least a bit. Any soldier wants the love of their leader, like a son wants the love of their father."
"That may be. If that is the case, your Minato Namikaze is the father of your entire village, whilst being younger than most of them. Remember however, that there is always a difference. The Kage must, and will be willing to sacrifice everything he has ever known for his village."
"Noted."
…
Our partnership was always strained. He never quite trusted me and I never trusted him. We talked to one another, more than any of our subordinates, but the conversation was always like playing shogi, trying to guess what their next move was, how to move against that, why they would do it, what they were trying to do in the end.
It was trying, but the work was done. He wanted, from what I could tell, to keep the status quo. He wasn't a fool, didn't think that a single city, no matter how big, could stand against the full might of the Leaf. He wanted to wait it out to support the next generation. He stated that Konoha's killings, namely your massacre at Kanabi bridge, created a cast of orphans, civilians and clans. Their situations were completely different, but their hate the same. He stated revenge was a vicious tool in the right hands, and though he would end up, ironically, correct, he meant it for the newer breed. Prodigies and clan shinobi who would be tailor made for war, and with the motivation to get through it. Revenge.
It made sense from a logistical and self-preserving standpoint. He would be reigning leader, in effect, of the whole city for decades to come. Why would he give that up, just to get killed by the Yellow Flash? Fighting against Leaf for some idiotic urge to shed blood in red revenge didn't pique his interest, which made him more dangerous than bigger and lesser men.
We were enemies yet I respected his drive. I sometimes imagine what would happen if better men were on our side, yet it is a useless thought. I dismiss it like any other.
…
I remember that day clearly though, sun shining bright, so bright it stung my eyes, metal searing hot, light cloth and bare chests the only clothes in sight. Me and Aka were walking, as we liked to do. I worked running or sitting, so it was a change of pace figuratively and literally. It helped that Aka's strut was as magnificent as ever, her curves ever present through her summer clothing, dark top and grey shorts and a yellow summer hat protecting her skin from the sun.
I was in love, so madly I barely believe it even now. When I think about that feeling, it feels unreal, surreal. How can one feel so much? The only every time was killing, and that required another to die, the medley of emotions, grief, self-hate, shock, pain, horror, fear, a cocktail too vicious to take, yet I drank, and dulled myself to it over time. Her love though, her beauty, her greatness, never got tiresome.
Which is why it destroyed me when she died. When Iwa killed her.
…
And Minato heard the sadness, the grief, the guilt in Takai's voice.
And he didn't believe it for a moment.
A/N: I am going to be on hiatus for a bit, exams are coming up and I won't be able to finish the story by then, but when I finish, I will finish this story.
Next chapter is the final one, everything will tie up by the next entry.
Keep in mind, Takai is lying about things, deep things, personal things, and he won't reveal them until he needs to. That isn't necessarily a betrayal though, hiding drugs from a parent isn't the same as wanting them dead, and in my mind Takai thinks of Minato as a father.
Takai, then and telling the story, is a true soldier, so similar, but when Aka dies, he breaks in a way, becomes his truest self unfurled, and he can't roll himself back up. His skills writhe uncontrollably, his emotions infect everyone he comes across. Over these 2 years, he went from a coward and a weakling, to a man able to compete with the 4th hokage himself. Yet more than that, he was changed, broken and sharpened and shaped into a tool hand crafted for survival.
Yet he is still broken. All of them are broken. But most of all, he is strong, because despite being destroyed, despite having nothing, he continues to live.
Aka as of now is a nothing character, because love is blind in a way. I realise that myself, having love, romantic. It cares not for the person everyone else sees but for the love visible only to one bewitched by it. But when Takai confronts that trauma, he will realise he never truly knew who she was.
Next chapter TBA, but maybe in a month or two, most of the chapter is completed.
Thanks for reading and reviewing.
