Chapter 14
Edward
We got through yesterday without much loss and now THIS! I sit on the sofa and ponder about my life. I am such an idiot! Yesterday evening everything was fine and today it's all gone. But when she came out of the bathroom today, the animal in me awoke. My prey Bella was standing in front of me in the black nothingness and I had to have her, come what may. I stalked her and she fled ... into my father's arms. This must have been very embarrassing for her, but I couldn't hold back my laughter. I'm such an idiot. Whether she still loves me? She's not going to leave me, is she? Is she? Then she went into the bathroom and signed my death warrant. I can't touch her for a day. I'm such an idiot. Why couldn't I pull myself together? This could have ended so beautifully. But no, I had to screw it all up. Great job, Edward. Really super. She went to her work, and I couldn't stand not seeing her for an hour. I crept to her study and knocked, but all the begging and whining didn't help. It usually had an effect with my mother and with Bella, too, actually. Did she have to have her strict day today of all days?
I leaned against the wall next to the door and slid down it. I wrapped my arms around my knees.
I wanted to stay close to her. My self-pity rose to unimagined heights. And the worst part of the whole thing is that she gets to touch me, but I don't get to touch her. I will not survive this day. I am condemned to death. With the body alive.
My mom was worried, but I couldn't say anything.
When my dad came to me, he tried to comfort me.
"It's going to be okay. She'll calm down. You shouldn't have laughed."
Thanks, Dad. Unfortunately, this tip comes too late.
My mom asked if she should make Barley soup and I just nodded.
A ray of light on the horizon. At least something.
Now she, my over all idolized treasure, was standing at the window with Rosalie and Alice.
I had to get to her, right away.
As I stood behind her, I smelled her. I sighed. And then she kissed me, on the lips, and I felt a little better.
She would not leave me; I knew that now.
My non-existent mood lifted a bit. My sweetheart suggested to help the two out there in the garden and I did her the favor.
I would like to touch her so much, her lips ... I'm such an idiot. It's my own fault.
Emmett was standing at a table with a blueprint on it.
"Where did you get that?", I asked.
"Internet," was his short answer and he read the plan intently.
"Well, son, better?"
Dad looked at me and I nodded.
"Something."
"Jake, get out of here or I'll kick your ass!", Emmett scolded and pushed Jake aside.
"Here Edward, Carlisle, take the sandpaper and bring these boards here ...," he pointed to a pile of finished sawn boards,"... up to snuff. One must not tear oneself a splinter."
We got to work, and I was able to continue thinking about my Bella.
I miss her so, although she is not twenty meters away from me. Whether I could go to her, maybe she kissed me again. A whole day and the new day would not start until zero o'clock. Mmm ... It's not that long. It's not like I have to wait until tomorrow morning. Do I? She said tomorrow and tomorrow starts at zero o'clock.
A squeak sounded and I was startled out of my thoughts.
Emmett had tripped over Jake, and the latter was now lying on the ground screaming his head off.
"You stupid animal! What are you standing in my way for!", Emmett grumbled and got back on his feet, but Jake did not.
I bent down to him and grabbed the leg that was sticking out at a weird angle.
"I think you broke Jake's leg."
I looked up at him.
"Oh ... bloody hell though!"
And already he was running towards the house.
We followed him.
He yanked open the door and screamed at the top of his lungs, "WE NEED AN AMBULANCE! IMMEDIATELY!"
My mom, Alice and my honey came running.
"What happened, Emmett? Who got hurt?", my mom asked and looked outside in panic.
"Calm down, Esmé. Jake has broken his leg. We don't need an ambulance, but we do need a vet."
Bella gasped and ran to Jake. I followed her. She bent over him and cuddled his head. He calmed down and Bella told him we were going to call a doctor.
"It's going to be okay, sweetheart. I promise."
She sobbed and threw herself into my arms.
That felt so good, and I pulled her into a hug. She clung to me. At least there was something good about Jake breaking his leg. I was able to touch Bella. I was instantly fine. My poor darling.
"Come on, let's call a vet. He can take a look at Jake then."
I put a finger under her chin and lifted her head. Tears rolled down her cheeks and I wiped them away with my thumb.
Should I dare? It is worth a try.
I bent my head down a little to her and kissed her gently on the lips. She did not resist.
Good.
I wanted so much to deepen the kiss, but I pulled myself together.
Do not exaggerate!
We went into the house, and I looked for a vet who made house calls.
After three phone calls, I had Doctor Wolff on the phone, and he agreed to come in.
"Here, Bella. I made you some tea, it'll calm you down."
My mother sat down next to us and handed Bella the cup.
She sniffled and took a sip.
"Thank you, Esmé."
"You're welcome, honey. Drink and all will be well."
She stroked her back and Bella looked at her gratefully.
Now we stood in front of Jake's enclosure and looked at him. He had a cast on his leg. Doctor Wolff said that it won't be long, and he can come off again.
Bella had caught herself and was in my arms.
Miracle. I thought I wouldn't survive the day and thanks to Jake and Emmett, it's saved. Hallelujah!
"Look, Bella, I have pencils. We can embellish Jake's plaster leg. What do you think?"
Alice had a pack of pens in her hand.
Bella nodded and we went to Jake, who snuggled up to Bella and she cuddled him.
"Lie down, Jake. We'll paint your plaster."
The sheep lay down on its side and so we got to its leg unhindered.
"It's a funny critter. He listens to Bella."
Emmett shook his head in disbelief.
Everyone immortalized himself. Flowers ... Get-well wishes ... until the whole plaster was colorful.
Bella stood up and leaned against me.
I was happy. I was allowed to touch her. I was allowed to kiss her.
"The 'until tomorrow' applies again from now on."
She kissed my cheek and went inside.
My world shattered into a thousand pieces. I'm such an idiot. Why did she do this to me? Doesn't she see me suffering in agony?
Emmett dragged us men back to the boards and instructed us to pick up where we left off. I could use a distraction.
Mom made us sandwiches and said that the lunch would be served this evening.
No Barley soup.
My mood had reached its lowest point again.
Very deep.
I sighed.
I sanded the board and continued to ponder.
She doesn't love me anymore. What if she's packing her bags right now? What if she's already called a cab? What if she leaves me?
I dropped everything and ran into the house.
"Bella?"
I looked into the kitchen.
Nothing.
I hurried on.
"Bella?"
She was not in the study either.
Panic crept up inside me.
She left!
My heart clenched in pain.
Bella, I love you. Don't leave me.
I ran back and my mom just came in from outside.
"Have you seen Bella?" I almost shouted at her.
"Yeah, baby, she's upstairs in your bedroom. She said something about a suitcase."
She had hardly finished the sentence when I ran up the stairs.
She was packing. She wanted to leave me. I would not let that happen. Never. I would fight for her. No matter what the cost.
I rushed into the room and Bella was standing in front of the closet putting clothes into a suitcase that was on the bed.
Please, dear God, help me!
"Bella."
I ran to her and fell to my knees in front of her. I wrapped my arms around her legs and pressed her against me.
"Don't leave me! I love you after all!", I whimpered hoarsely. If I hold her tight, she can't keep packing.
"What? ... What are you talking about, my Honey Bunny?"
She looked down at me in confusion.
"Don't leave me."
Tears came to my eyes.
"I'm not going to leave you! Where did you get such a stupid idea?"
She was still confused.
"You pack ..."
That was all I could say and my voice broke.
"I'm not packing! I'm sorting out things I don't need anymore. Yesterday we bought so much that it won't all fit in the closet."
My heart started beating again. I was so relieved. She stayed with me.
With relief, I kissed her legs and pressed her even tighter against me.
Now my darling laughed, and it was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard.
"You're exaggerating a bit, Honey Bunny." She leaned down to me and kissed me ... on the lips. "Just like Esmé. You must have gotten that from her."
And another kiss. I was whole again. We were still one. Happiness flowed through me.
"I love you so much, my darling, my Bella," I sniffled.
"I love you very much too, my Honey Bunny. But I'm still a little mad at you."
She looked into my eyes, and I saw only love.
"I'm very sorry ..."
Bella interrupted me.
"Stop apologizing. How far along is Emmett with the crib?"
She changed the subject.
I was relieved.
"No idea. I wasn't quite with it," I said and stood up.
Bella looked at me and she was thinking.
"All right, Edward. Touching allowed, but no kisses. Understood?"
I didn't have to be told twice and put my arms around her body.
She felt so good in my arms. I would never let go of her again. If no kisses were allowed, then my head had to serve and I rubbed my face on her breast, on her neck, on her belly ... everywhere.
"Edward, stop it now," she scolded me while laughing.
The whole day I did not leave her side. Some hand always touched her, no matter where and how. I followed her like a shadow. I would have liked to strap her to my back, but I didn't dare ask.
After I had eaten two plates of Barley soup, I felt even better. The others had cabbage rolls on their plates and looked at me in disgust.
I do not care. It tastes ... and that's the most important thing.
My hand was on Bella's thigh.
Physical contact was the only thing that counted. My darling kissed me now and then, always on the lips, and my fears disappeared.
We still sat in the living room and talked about this and that.
I put one arm around her shoulder and the other hand took her hand. Dad was reading the paper, Emmett was studying his blueprint, Rose, Alice and my sweetheart were talking about the gala and Esmé was a bit everywhere.
"There's a flu going around Spain. Swine flu and it's already spreading throughout Europe," my dad informed us.
The main thing was that my family was doing well, I didn't care about anything else.
Bella
My poor Jake. My cuddly sheep. He is lying in his enclosure recovering. I was so upset that only my Honey Bunny could comfort me ... and he did. I love him so much. But I had to be strict, but could not. Touching was allowed again, and he used that extensively. How he knelt there in front of me and clung to my legs ... it broke my heart. He was a master in exaggeration, but he also calmed down quickly. He already dragged me to the hospital for a cold because he was afraid I might die of pneumonia.
Tears shimmered in his eyes.
I felt so infinitely sorry for him. What had he gotten himself into again? Me and leave him? I can't. Never ever.
Now we were lying in our bed and Edward was wrapped around me like a second blanket.
I was allowed to go to the toilet alone, that was the only exception. But only because I used my powers of persuasion.
What a crazy day. Our home was a madhouse and a monkey circus at the same time. When would peace and quiet reign here again? I couldn't wait.
I woke up and was all sweaty. It was still dark, and my Honey Bunny was mumbling in his sleep again. He was restless and still clung tightly to me.
"Bella, don't go ..."
That had hit him badly and I regretted in retrospect that I had been so strict.
"I do love you ..."
I love you too, my Honey Bunny.
With one hand I stroked his cheek.
"I love you too, my Honey Bunny," I whispered to him.
My hand wandered into his hair, and he quieted down. I almost fell asleep again.
"NO! DON'T LEAVE ME!"
I was so frightened that I cried out. Edward was completely beside himself.
"Edward, wake up."
I shook him firmly. I turned on the small lamp on my nightstand.
He opened his eyes and naked panic was in his gaze.
"Sh ... sh ... it's all good. I'm here."
I kissed him.
"Bella ... oh Bella ... That was such a terrible dream ..."
"It's all good, Honey Bunny."
The panicked look slowly disappeared from his eyes. He looked so desperate and then he pounced on me and kissed me until I couldn't breathe anymore.
"I love you so much it hurts. I wouldn't survive losing you," he said, kissing my neck, my shoulders.
With a flowing movement he took off my top and wandered with his lips to my breasts.
I groaned.
"I would ... not ... survive ... that ... either," I gasped.
His lips enclosed first one nipple and then the other and he sucked on it.
Oh God ... I can't stand that for long.
He lay down between my legs and continued ... unceasingly. Suddenly he straightened up and pulled his T-shirt over his head.
Skin to skin.
He licked and sucked himself all over my torso, no place was left out.
My most intimate point was on fire, seeking release.
"You are so beautiful," he whispered to my left breast, licking and nibbling. Then he turned to the right breast and whispered to it, "And so are you, just like your sister. "
I had to chuckle.
"Edward ... please ... do something ..."
My hands were on his back, and I clawed at him.
I had no idea what and how, but I didn't care if only the almost unbearable pulling disappeared. His one hand slid down my stomach and rested on my sleeping pants, right where I desperately needed friction. And then he moved his fingers. My heart beat so fast that I no longer understood my own thoughts.
"Yes ... yes ... Edward ..."
My pelvis began to gyrate, matching the movements of his hand and fingers.
He continued to lick and suck my breasts.
"Harder ... faster ... please ...", I stammered.
He straightened up between my legs and watched me and I didn't care at all. I had sent my shame on vacation this morning. My eyes were closed, and I burned brighter than the sun. My Honey Bunny was talking to me. Actually, we did not talk much during sex, but I liked it.
"Bella, you are so beautiful ... I love you ... Yes, baby ... is it good like that ..."
I could only nod.
"You are mine alone ... only mine ... come for me, my darling."
I exploded in a fireball of feelings. I screamed and moaned and gasped, all at once.
He kissed me and his hand kept rubbing until my body had stopped its twitching.
"Edward ... that was so good. I love you."
He lay down and pulled me into his arms.
"I love you too."
And his lips brushed over mine.
"I was mean ..."
He interrupted me.
"I shouldn't have laughed like that. It must have been very embarrassing for you," he whispered into my hair.
I chuckled.
"And how." Everything was fine again. "Thank goodness it was your dad. Imagine if I had run into Emmett."
A low rumble made us stop.
A silent curse followed.
There was someone on the stairs. Who on earth was sneaking around in the house at night?
"Did you hear that too?", I whispered.
"Yes."
Quickly looked at the alarm clock.
3:12 a.m.
I climbed out of bed and crept to the door, Edward behind me.
Again a soft noise and whispered words. That didn't exist.
I yanked the door open with a jerk and a scream came from the person in the hallway.
Fully dressed, with shoes in hand, she stood there. Her eyes were wide open in shock and her mouth was open.
"Where did you come from?"
