Chapter Seventeen
Six Weeks Later
"Good morning," Georg whispered as he kissed Maria's face gently to rouse her from a still deep slumber at almost 9:30am. Maria sighed and stretched, "Five more minutes," she whispered rolling away from her husband's lips.
"You said that two hours ago," Georg replied. "It's time to get up and greet the day."
"Two hours have not..." Maria sat up and looked at the bedside clock. "9:30! Oh, Georg, I have to get your breakfast and I promised I'd help Julia with her math essay. She's really trying to impress this teacher, this Mr. Moynahan and..."
"Maria," Georg laughed softly. "I made my own breakfast, and I helped Julia with her essay. I also dropped her off at school and picked this up from Rosamaria's on my way back."
Georg held out a bag with one of Rosa's fresh baked chocolate croissants. Maria choked up at the loving gesture. Georg had been closed and standoffish since he argued with Lida at Louisa's. He hadn't engaged her very much in conversation, he had only mildly participated in a "back to school" party for Cathy before she left for Wellesley and had generally kept to himself. It was heartwarming to see a glimpse at least of her husband under that sheen of anguish.
Georg saw the tears swimming in Maria's eyes. "Darling?" he softly queried. "Did I do something to upset you?"
Maria hastily wiped her eyes and shook her head, "Oh, Georg, no. Not at all, I am just so happy you are starting to feel better. I don't know, I felt like I haven't known you these last weeks."
"It's time to start coping, Maria," Georg replied. "We have to let Lida work this out in her own mind. I can't help her; she won't let me. She is finally letting you back in her life and that's a start."
Maria had lunch with Lida the day before and it had gone pretty well. Maria took the time to explain to Lida it had been her decision to keep the truth of her birth from her for so long.
"What happened to me," Maria explained as she sipped a soda in a booth in the the back of the local diner. "Was a violent thing. A terrible thing that I wouldn't even let myself remember. I convinced myself it was a terrible dream only it wasn't. I was ill for several weeks when I finally passed out in your Papa's study, and he called for the doctor."
Lida sniffled, "And you found out you were having me?"
"Not yet," Maria replied. "In Austria in 1938 if you worked for someone, and you were an unmarried woman, that person was responsible for you. The doctor told your Papa because what happened next was his decision. He didn't have to even consult me. I was his servant, you see, even though he never regarded me as such. He never treated any of his employees like they were less than human the way many men of his station did and often do. Anything to do with me and my life was up to him."
"Why? Why is it always what the Captain...Papa wants. Why don't you get a say ever?"
"I did get a say," Maria replied. "Your Papa could have taken matters into his own hands, but he didn't. He could have sent me away and had me give you to the Sisters to raise, or he could have sent me to the hills, but he didn't. He asked me to marry him instead, he promised me things would be okay, that no one besides Uncle Max, the doctor, our housekeeper in Austria, Frau Schmidt, and the two of us would even know that I'd been raped. There was so much shame in it then."
"That was Austria, this is America and I'm 22, you could have told me the truth," Lida insisted.
"Your Papa wanted to, he wanted to more than one time and I begged him not to do it, "Maria replied firmly. "Then when it looked like we had no choice, your Papa changed his mind. He didn't want you to feel any pain. He loves you so much and it is killing him, this anger you have inside. Since the moment he knew you existed, all he's ever wanted to do was protect you."
Lida shook her head, "But he didn't protect me, Mama. He's hurt me more than anything. If you say that everything was up to him, why didn't he take matters into his own hands, if protecting me was so important to him? He could have overruled you, he's done it before with all of us." Lida took a sip of her own drink, her hands shaking visibly. "Mama, I have no idea who I am. Do I really fit here or do I fit somewhere else? Both of you took that from me, but I can understand why you did. I can forgive you, you were hurt so badly and had to marry a man twice your age in secret, in fear... but I can't forgive...I just can't. I'm not ready yet. I can barely stand to sit here and even talk about Papa, and even I don't understand why."
"I just wish she was able to believe me," Maria sighed. "Able to truly know it was my choice."
"All her life she has seen me steer the ship and I do, but she doesn't understand, none of the children totally understand what this room is for, what we do behind closed doors. Other than make love...Maybe, for Julia's sake, and Cathy, we need to be more open and let them see how united we really are."
Maria touched Georg's cheek. He had lost a little weight and the slight wrinkles around his eyes had grown a bit deeper, but today his eyes were shining. "I love you, " Maria whispered. "Now give me that bag. Is there coffee in the kitchen?"
"Your wish is my command, my Darling," Georg smiled. "I'll make a fresh pot, you get dressed and we will walk today, a long stroll on our hill, just you and me."
Maria hadn't heard a better plan in a long time. She got up and hurried to start their day.
The couple ate their breakfast at leisure then packed a picnic to take a long walk up the winding hills that surrounded their home. Georg slid his arm around Maria and carried the basket in his free hand. The sun was out and shining, Georg felt more alive than he had in a long while.
Halfway up the highest hill, Maria had to stop. She wobbled a bit then leaned forward dropping her head between her knees. "Darling?" Georg asked with concern.
"I just need a minute," Maria replied. "I'm really hot."
Her face was flushed with a slight pink, making her all the more beautiful to Georg. "Take your time," Georg replied. "I could use a break myself. Here sit down on the rock and have a sip of lemonade from the thermos."
Maria nodded and stumbled again as she turned to sit. "Dizzy?" Georg prompted. She had been hot and dizzy a few times in the last few weeks.
"A touch," Maria replied. "Are you all right? You're breathing hard."
"We just hiked up a couple hills and I'm an old submariner, of course I'm breathing hard. This isn't about me," Georg replied quickly.
"And restarting your cigarette habit however restricted hasn't helped either," Maria countered him. "Mark my words, one of these days they are going to figure out those things cause sickness and not just in pregnant women."
Georg offered Maria another sip of lemonade, choosing not to engage. He artfully changed the subject. "Did Marta talk to you?"
"Not since Sunday," Maria replied. "Why?"
.
Georg laughed, "Because she knows I'm an old softie as well as an old man. She asked if we would watch the kids a couple days a week starting this winter. She wants to finish her nursing degree, help Curtis more in the office. I think they are done having kids."
"Done having kids," Maria laughed. "I can see that conversation now. Marta never says much until she does then watch out. She can cut Brigitta down at the knees."
Georg laughed. "Move on?"
Maria nodded only this time she draped her arm through Georg's and leaned into him she was already tired.
"What do you think? You want to run after a couple little ones a few days a week?" Georg asked.
Maria nodded, "What are grandparents for? Marta will be a good nurse. She probably knows more just from being married to Curtis than she will learn in school. I'm sure she will do just great."
The couple settled into a comfortable silence as they walked to a favorite picnic spot. Georg was trying so hard, Maria could tell he was, to move on from the shattering events with Lida, but deep down Maria knew Georg's heart would never heal until he was reconciled with their daughter.
Montpelier, VT
"Thanks for having me, Uncle Max," Lida said giving her uncle a kiss. "I'm sorry I've been kind of off the last few weeks. It's hard trying to find a place and get settled by yourself, well more or less."
"Louisa said you can stay with her as long as you want, " Max reminded Lida.
"I'm in the way," Lida replied. "Plus she keeps pushing me to go to family dinner and talk to..to my.. well..."
"He's the same man he always was,' Max said with a touch of edge to his voice. "But he's not going to come to you. That time has passed. I know your Papa a long time, we were naval recruits together, we fought in the war together, I stood as his second in two weddings and handled him through all of your births. You are misplacing your anger."
"No," Lida shook her head. "I'm angry with Mama too and the man that fathered me, if I could look into his face I'd spit in his eye. It's not even the lie anymore, it's the power. I should have been told when I was 18."
"That's what your Papa wanted to do," Max replied. "But your mother begged him. I remember sitting with him after he finally calmed her down. He was shaking, he was so upset that she was so upset. There's is nothing that cuts deeper into Georg von Trapp's soul than seeing your mother cry. Heaven help you if you are the one that made her cry."
"So, what, you want me to believe that Mama spoke and he listened, just like that?" Lida asked. "He never did that with any of the other kids."
"No," Max admitted. "But this was a different circumstance."
Lida gave up, even Uncle Max didn't understand. "Perhaps," was all she said before changing the subject. "I need your help, Uncle Max."
Max raised his eyebrow, he had no idea where this was going, but he was pretty sure he wasn't going to like it.
"I need to get out on my own," Lida continued. "I got an apartment, but all it's got is a cot and a stove. I need some help getting on my feet and I was hoping you might give me a loan."
Max closed his eyes, he expected this might happen, but he didn't want to think about a response. If he said yes, he would be supporting Lida's rift with Georg, if he said no, it might drive her even farther away.
"I understand the need to get your head on straight, Lida," Max confirmed. "When I first arrived in America my head was all over the place trying to cope with what I'd seen. I needed to be around my family then, but in your case, perhaps that's not what you need. You might need time alone, so yes, I will help you with rent and getting some furnishings, but you have to promise me that you will really search your soul regarding this grudge against your Papa."
"I will," Lida said after thinking a moment. "I am, Uncle Max, but there are some things I can't get past and until I do, I just can't be where he is. I know how terrible it sounds, but it's true."
Max sighed, "Honestly, Lida, I think it's good that you aren't seeing your Papa right now. Your anger is, as I said before, misplaced, if you aren't speaking, at least you aren't heaping this load of angst onto him unfairly. My door is always open to you, dear girl, but please, do as I asked."
Lida again promised she would both stay away from the family until she got her mind right and work hard to do so at the same time.
"I'll have the money for you by tomorrow. I'll leave it under the counter at the bakery," Max promised. 'And please, don't say a word about where you got the money, your Papa won't ever forgive me for helping you stay alone when all he wants to do is help you through, but as I said, I do understand."
With those words hanging in the tense air. Max left Lida to her thoughts.
A/N: Slowly but surely Lida is rearranging her mind, and our couple has a little bit of romance as well. More to come, plus I'm doing a new one shot that I'm almost certain most of my usual readers won't be able to read, still I have read another story on this site that irked me so much I had to do something based on that same idea with all the historical and character accuracy I could muster. I hope to get it up this week.
Please keep reviewing, messaging, etc. I love to hear from readers and talk about our favorite movie.
