Edward isn't wrong. The medicines make me so sick to my stomach, and I can't keep anything down. I don't even think I felt that awful from the illness, but the medicines instead. I'm a little breathless, and the cough is horrible, but the nausea beats everything. They move me back to ICU, which means I'm again hooked up to all the monitors and even given oxygen again.

If I never see another nasal cannula again, I will have lived happily ever after.

I'm fucking miserable and just downright angry. I was so close to being free. Emmett found the best hotel, and I'd have had my own king-sized bed to myself—except when Edward visited—but now, I'm stuck in the uncomfortable hospital bed and have to keep pretending I'm not dating my doctor.

"You need to drink, Bells," Emmett says, holding a cup up as I lay curled on my side, holding my stomach.

I shake my head. "That's what the IV is for."

He sighs, clearly frustrated. I couldn't even take much of the soup he brought earlier before throwing up. I hear the door open, and he looks up, shaking his head. I don't even have the strength to turn to see who it is, but I soon hear his voice.

"Still sick to your stomach?"

I nod as he comes around and takes a seat beside Emmett. "Your meds suck."

He smiles sadly. "They're strong, but the good news is that you're not getting worse, which means they're working, and you're getting better."

I huff. Better my ass, I think as I roll my eyes. "I don't want to be here anymore."

He takes my hand, slowly moving his thumb over it. "I know, beautiful girl, but we need to keep a close eye on you. I'll discharge you as soon as possible."

I shake my head as tears fill my eyes. "I'm tired of hospitals, Edward. I want to go home. Fuck everything. Just take me home," I cry.

He gets up from his seat, shuts the door, and pulls the curtain closed. Suddenly, he's in bed with me, pressed against my back as his arms wrap around me. "I'm so sorry, Bella. Let it out."

I do. I just cry as he holds me, and my brother grips my hand. I'm surrounded by those I love most as I let myself drown in self-pity. I'm miserable. I was ready to leave, and now, I'm stuck here until I'm better. The anti-rejection meds complicate everything, and my heart is in danger, so I get it, but I still hate being locked in the hospital.

It's not fair.


Thanks to May, Nole, Fran, Brier, and Meg for prereading and Sally for Beta'ing.

Sorry for the infrequent updates. Over the last month and a half I've been incredibly sick and in the hospital, and then after 13 years I quit my job and found a better one. So, it's been a lot. I hope to do better as I get into a new groove with my new job.