Something Old, Something New
by Castlefan6
A/N: By Request, PRE-Series Hookup, SEQUEL to Diminished Recall. Picks up exactly where that ends. COMPLETELY AU except for the conversation that prompted this and the use of some character's names. For CeCe, Friend, and Co-Writer with Pen2Paper.
I don't own Castle; I use the characters for amusement purposes only
I hope it's close to what you wanted.
A/N: Laurie's occupation was a songwriter, she said she had been lucky a few times. For the sake of this fiction, please assume the songs written by Diane Warren were her work, under her pen name of DW. Thx
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Chapter 13
Hartwell Lake
Hartwell Georgia
Royce's Cabin
Two Hours Later
Kate had struggled with her emotions, she knew Mike cared for her, hell he even had said he loved her. One of two women, in his life he had loved, were the words he had used, that meant he had loved her the same time she was in love with him, but was strong enough to be faithful to his wife.
God, that made her love him more, and well, would she ever be enough to fill the void left by Marie's memory? Was it her he was kissing, or was it Marie his thoughts were filled with when he closed his eyes?
She had read his letter multiple times, each time, feeling love and respect for the man who was grilling the steaks on the deck. He had given her space; he knew her so very well and knew there were times to let the silence fill the room, this was one of those times as she tried to come to grips with what all of this meant.
She glanced down at the letter, and read it once again,
Dear Kate,
I bet I've written this letter a hundred times. Someday I might actually send it. There's no excuse for how I left you, it was cowardly for me to wait for you to be promoted before I retired and left without so much as a goodbye. I shared a huge part of my life with you, and you deserved to know what was going on at work and with my relationship with Marie. To say I'm sorry wouldn't begin to cover my remorse, but maybe you will understand by the time you finish this letter.
"I knew how you felt about me, I know it sounds callous, perhaps even weak, but knowing that I was still desirable, after the ordeal I was undergoing with Marie, well, it was selfish for me to use your emotion to make me feel desired. I'm sorry, not that you had feelings, that I didn't have the courage to sit and talk to you, as Maire asked me to. She liked you and said I should respect your feelings, and that the decision wasn't mine to make for you and your life. You're both right, and I was wrong, it should have been your decision.
"I wanted you to know that as much as it hurt when I heard you allowed the FED to move in, it also made me happy that you wouldn't be alone. I know how lonely you were, hell how lonely I was and still am.
"I thought I could get over it, but living in the city, I even saw you two at the park ice skating once, sealed it. I had to leave New York. I tried to live the dreams that Marie and I had, the only trouble was they were the dreams for the two of us, and it made me miserable, missing her made me miss you even more.
"That's how I wound up in Hartwell Georgia, I couldn't get you out of my mind, but at least I didn't have to worry about running into you and your new love. And now for the hard part, Kate, I'm not sure if the feelings I think you had for me are still there, or if I waited too long and blew that chance.
"I guess I'll never know unless I get the courage to send you this letter. I'm working on it, I promise you. Hell, I might even mail it, someday. The last thing you want is to look back on your life and wonder if only, believe me, it's worse wondering IF than being told no. I hope you get to read this someday, and well, someday.
"Always,
"Mike"
She was surprised at the details, Mike usually considered four sentences a lengthy report, but he had opened his heart to her, something she had tried to get him to do so many times, but, well at least now she knew how he had felt.
It was time for both of them to stop the hints and innuendo, and put their cards on the table. She needed to know how he felt now, she knew in her heart that she still cared about him more than any man she had ever known in her adult life, but what were they going to do about it?
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Castle's Loft
Three Weeks Later
Rick and Laurie had returned to New York once Rick had found someone he could trust with the day-to-day production of the movie, he knew he was in over his head in some areas of production, but at least fans would be able to see where the book and script were similar.
Laurie had submitted her score for the soundtrack and backing music and could evaluate the recordings just as well from New York. They both were homesick and needed some time just to themselves to discuss what was next. Laurie knew her heart's desire, she wondered if Rick felt the same.
Alexis was due home in three days, so they decided to visit the Hamptons, out of earshot and meddling from Martha and her Graydar. She loved Rick's mother, but why did she have to be so damn nosy, honestly, she could piss off the pope.
On the drive up, Rick was more quiet than usual, almost like he was worried about something. She picked up on it, and asked gently, "OK Rick, tell me what's going on in that beautiful brain of yours? Did I do something to upset you?" she asked, almost afraid for him to answer,
"WHAT? No Laurie, no, I'm sorry, I was just thinking I mean we spent almost six weeks in Los Angeles, and I know I didn't spend the time with you I wanted to. I know you got close to your music director and well, I was"
"Oh sweetie, please don't tell me you thought that Howie and I were anything more than work partners, besides Rick, he's married." She said,
"Well, he wouldn't be the first married guy to cheat on his wife, I mean"
"Baby, I mean he's married to Ronald, they have been for five years. You have nothing to worry about, and I'm sorry I should have picked up on that. Remember Rick, we said, honesty always, and I won't hurt you, I know what Kyra did to you, and I still have trouble liking her some days because of it. I could never treat you that way, I promise." She said as his face lit up with not just a smile, but her smile.
She reached over and powered on the CD Player, and out came the beautiful voice, anyone would know within two notes that Celine Dion was singing, but Rick didn't know the song.
I Love You
I must be crazy now
Maybe I dream too much
But when I think of you
I long to feel your touch
To whisper in your ear
Words that are old as time
Words only you would hear
If only you were mine
I wish I could go back to the very first day I saw you
Should've made my move when you looked into my eyes
Cause by now I know that you'd feel the way that I do
And I'd whisper these words as you'd lie here by my side
I love you
Please say you love me too
These three words
They could change our lives forever
And I promise you that we will always be together
'til the end of time
So today I finally find
The courage deep inside
Just to walk right up to your door
But my body can't move
When I finally get to it
Just like a thousand times before
Then without a word, he handed me this letter
Read, "I hope this finds the way into your heart"
It said
I love you
Please say you love me too
These three words
They could change our lives forever
And I promise you that we will always be together
'til the end of time
(Well maybe I) I need a little love
(And maybe I) I need a little care
And maybe I (maybe you), maybe you (maybe you)
Oh, you need somebody just to hold you
If you do, just reach out, and I'll be there
(I love you) say you love me too
(Please say you love me too) 'til the end of time
These three words
They could change our lives forever
And I promise you that we will always be together, oh
(I love you)
(Please say you love me too) say you love me
Please, please, you love me too
('til the end of time) 'til the end of time
My baby love, together, together, forever
('til the end of time)
I love you
I will be your light, shining bright
Shining through your eyes
My baby, say it
Rick saw the smile on her face as she laid her head on his shoulder, then heard her sweet voice singing along to the CD. Damn, this must be one of the songs she sold that Celine was recording, he waited for the music to stop.
He pulled the car off the road next to a roadside picnic table, turned to her, and whispered as he pulled her close, "I love You, you wrote that didn't you?" She smiled, as she kissed him, "Yes, but I didn't know that they were going to release it as the B side of Because You Loved Me" Both are songs I wrote for you, my love." She whispered as she captured his lips,
He kissed her, "I'm so sorry for getting out of sorts, oh hell, I was jealous, I'm sorry," he said, she kissed him gently, "I'm not, I'm glad my man gets jealous that means he loves me too. I know how jealous I get, anytime you have to deal with some of those bimbos on set, but I know, I'm your girl. It doesn't stop me from getting jealous, but it keeps me from driving myself crazy." She laughed,
"Rick, we're only about twenty minutes from the beach house, why don't we get there and talk in our favorite room," she said, stealing one more kiss. He smiled as she leaned into him, "One more reason I love you, you're not only beautiful but smart. Let's go sweetheart." Rick pressed loop on the CD, and the songs repeated from A side Because You Loved Me, to side B, I Love You. Laurie sang along with each song, God he loved this woman.
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12th Precinct
Same Time Frame
6:35 AM
Kate and Mike had discussed his letter, and many other things, and one thing was decided, what they felt deserved at least a shot. Mike decided to return to New York for at least her first week, she would need support and he knew that once you return, often your friends have moved on and you're left alone.
He knew that the suspension hurt her feelings much more than the loss of income, and she was thoroughly disappointed with Javi and his lack of caring. She hadn't discussed anything with anyone in New York since she left for Georgia. She wasn't ready for some of the surprises, but Mike had coached her well. Expect the worst, anything different will be a win.
Her first contact was being escorted by a uniform patrolman to Captain Montgomery's office. She had already requalified with her spare piece, (gun) knowing regulations would force her to requalify. Royce still had so many contacts, he arranged for it to happen, she had the certificate and target in her bag, waiting for Roy to instruct her on what her orders were.
At one time, she felt as if Roy was more a friend than a boss, now those feelings were gone, she was a detective, and he was the captain, and commanding officer, the end of the story. He opened his door, and said gruffly, "Come in Detective, as you know you will need to requalify before I can reissue your weapon, here is your shield and ID, keys to your car, it's been serviced and brought to your parking spot" he said then looked up over his glasses to see her standing at attention, staring straight ahead.
"Any questions Detective?" he asked,
"No questions Sir, here is my requalification certificate and target, I paid for the requalification during off hours at the range so I wouldn't waste any time once reinstated," she said,
Roy looked at the certificate, and then the target," Very well Detective, here's your weapon, now go report to Hastings for your first assignment starting at 0800 hours. You're free to get coffee or breakfast, you have over an hour before you need to report." He said,
"Thank you, Sir, will I be sitting at the same desk?" she asked,
"For now, Hastings will make that call, but you may sit there if you wish, Dismissed," he said dryly, both knowing that no matter what happened things had changed, forever.
She went to her old desk, careful not to get too comfortable, she pulled out the To Go cup of coffee she had stopped to purchase, and the file of do's and don't Mike and she put together the last two weeks in Georgia. Thank God he was as patient as he had always been, he talked her down several times.
After three days of rehearsing what she could face, her losing her cool each time, he finally said, "Kate if you want to stay a cop, you need to forget what happened, treat it like your very first day on the job. If you keep remembering your old snark terms come into the conversation without you even knowing it, they will be watching for that, even pushing you. You pissed Boyle off, and he will try anything to get you out of his hair and take your shield. How bad do you want to be a cop?" he asked then walked away out on the deck, he had almost lost patience with her.
She knew that when Mike walked away, don't follow, let him collect himself, then they would talk about it. He came back in, and they formulated a play sheet of possible reactions. He played the good guy, Kate threw everything she could think of at him, and each time he would answer in a polite professional manner, only addressing the issue. He had marked them down, giving her a cheat sheet to refer to before she lost her cool.
She had just finished her coffee when she felt someone standing behind her, she turned to look and Kevin Ryan was grinning from ear to ear, "God Kate, it's good to see you. We didn't know if you would be back or not, I mean"
"It's OK Kevin, I didn't either. I did a lot of thinking while I was off, so it was a good mental break," she said, then she saw Anne come out of Roy's office, and headed her way,
"Welcome back Kate, how are you?" Anne asked,
"I'm good Anne, better than I've been in a long time," she said softly,
"Great, do you want to use your desk, I mean, no one's touched it since you've been gone." She asked,
"Captain Montgomery said it would be up to you, so anywhere you want me is fine" Kate replied.
"Well, just resume your old desk, and we'll use the small conference room for meetings, have you been briefed by anyone?" she asked,
"No, I asked Captain what I should do, and he told me to relax my shift started at 0800 so I came out and enjoyed my coffee. Do you have an active case you need me on Anne?" Kate asked,
"More like cases, Kate. We're swamped with more cases coming in every day. I'm glad you're back, so feel free to jump in with any questions or observations you see." She said as she briefed her on the three current cases they were working on.
Kate resisted the old urge to be the one at the murder board, she hung back and let Anne and then Roz brief them on updates on the three cases that Anne's team had been working on. She spotted one commonality immediately, each of the victims had either purchased or had in their possession a knock-off of a name brand, Gucci, or another high-end label. The best place to purchase the knock-offs as they were called was the shops on Canal Street.
"Anne has anyone checked the shops on Canal Street, I only glanced, but it appears each of your victims had purchased something from a shop there, a purse it looks like on the notes," Kate asked,
"No, Kate, I guess we were all so exhausted we all missed that. Can you and Ryan take that lead and check out the shops to see if we can turn up something? That's the first promising lead we've had, and as you said, it ties three murders together."
"Sure thing, Kevin do you mind driving, please? I need to check some of the case notes on our way there." She asked
"Sure, Kate, no problem. Ready when you are." He said,
She showed him her shield and weapon, "as soon as I use the restroom I'm ready, let's go" she said,
She sent Mike a quick text, about where they were heading, and a quick reply came back, "Be sure Ryan has your SIX, Stay Safe, Royce"
"Will Do, see you for dinner tonight, Thx Mike, I needed you to be here for me."
"KEEP Focused Kid, time for us when you get home, SAFELY" his way of telling her to keep her head on straight,
"See you soon, then a heart emoji" followed a minute later, He did love her.
TBC
A/N: Had comments about Royce being a Dad, not an aged lover. In this story, he is indeed her love interest, at least for now. She confessed in Canon that she had been in love with him, and probably still was during that episode. Stana did a hell of a job showing the tears she hid from her team in that scene.
