Disclaimer. I don't own the characters. There is no more gain than the writing practice that is done here

Hi Xanadu, I just read your comment to my Betrayal story and I'm confused, you notice that in it I would have "stolen" arguments from a story called Admottance.- As a result of your comment I read that story and I can't find what was that I "stolen" from Admottance, since they are two stories with completely different plots, maybe I don't detect it because of my little brain.

On the other hand, in January 2023 I published my first story in Fanfiction called "2003-2016 Long live until you discover the big secret" in which Jack's "non-paternity" with respect to Monica is exposed, and if you are willing to reading that story, even if you conclude that it is not good and/or not well written, you will still be able to see that, although both deal with the same theme, my story contains a development and a conclusion that differs markedly from Admottance's, even the latter, was published on June 18, 2023, which also makes it impossible for me to have stolen anything.

As for my little head, I respect your opinion and I am sorry that in Bitrayal you have come across an amateur who has little brains, but I assure you that I have dignity and I do not steal.

I am not a writer, I am a labor lawyer, and I would have loved to know how to write life stories, since in my little head I always had ideas for stories to tell, but work, family and life took me down another path.

I hope to improve over time and I take your comment into account, regarding to try to mobilize my neurons and fluids, not so I have stolen because it is not in my lifestyle.

Chapter 20: The friend is there for her – Monologues – The journey

Chandler got a flight for mid-morning the next day.

He called one of his colleagues to let him know that due to family problems he had to travel to NY and he calculated that he would be back in 5 or 6 days. He also called Judy to let her know the approximate time of his arrival.

He told Jack and Ross the news about Monica's health and about his trip.

"Dude, are you sure you want to go see her?" `asked Ross

"Look, Judy told me that she's very depressed, she's not eating, she's getting weak, she won't get up, that the doctor told them her condition was dangerous if she didn't get better soon and… Ross, first of all, before my reluctance to see her, my children are here, I have to be there for them, your mother and the others believe that I can help her… and the children need their mother"

Although he was sure about the decision he had made, since he did it for his children, first during the night and then during the flight he felt worried, uncomfortable, a little scared about how he was going to react, how he was going to feel when see her just thinking about it made his heart flutter.

From the airport, while waiting for boarding, he calls Joey to tell him the latest news. Joey worried about what this encounter might do to his friend.

Joey also asked him "are you sure to go, do you feel strong?"

"Joey, I have to get the strength from somewhere, I do it for my children, I don't want anything to happen to their mother, and if she needs me to get better, I'll go there as her friend Chandler would have done."

When Joey was cut off he was really worried about how this situation would affect his brother.

During the trip in Chandler's head there was a dispute, between the two Chandlers, the one who told him to take care of his walls and that there was no forgiveness, and the other who knew that his love for her had not diminished.

When he got off the flight he made up his mind to stay strong and distant, she had hurt him terribly, even his heart was broken, and his trust was shattered, no, there would be no forgiveness, it would just be an old friend helping another.

After stopping by the hotel and taking a shower to relax, since he was a nervous wreck, he headed to Phoebe's apartment.

He opened it to Judy, who immediately hugged him, thanking him for coming.

"Judy, you have nothing to be thankful for, the children need her healthy and strong mother, and if I can do that for them, I will."

"Look son... she's lying down, today I brought her a bowl of chicken soup that she barely tasted... that one that's there is not my daughter..." "You are our last hope, she loves you, she never stop loving you, believe it or not, and we think that seeing you is going to help her get out of this pit."

"Judy, I am here as a friend, as the father of her children, nothing more…"

"Yes son, I know... and that's why I appreciate so much that you came"

Judy led Chandler into Monica's bedroom.

The room was dim, Monica was lying in a fetal position, on the side of her good arm, the other was resting on her hip. She was still, though it seemed to Chandler that she was crying.

He came over, sat on the edge of the bed and said "Hello."

Monica turned onto her back, looking at him with wide eyes, blinking several times, shock and disbelief on her face. "Am I dreaming or delusional" she thought to herself.

When he said "Hello" again and took her hand, Monica burst into a sob, squeezed his hand tightly, and a weak smile appeared on her face.

"You came..., you really are here...it's not a dream..."

"Yes, I am really here, your mom told me that you are not doing the right things with your health and I came to see what was happening"

"God Chandler, I'm so happy to see you..." and she weakly pushed herself up on the bed to face and close to him.

Chandler was shocked to see her so deteriorated, the strong and dynamic woman was no longer in her body, she seemed like another completely vulnerable Monica….

"Can I ask you a favor…. " said Monica with a trembling voice….

"Yes tell me"

"I can give you a hug …"

Chandler's heart began to flutter, it scared him terribly to have her in his arms again…. but without saying anything he approached and hugged her…. hoping she wouldn't notice the galloping of his heart.

Monica hugged him as tightly as her condition allowed her and cried on his shoulder...

They remained embraced for a long time, until she calmed down, and he took her away from him.

Judy banged on the door and came in with a bowl of soup, she looked at Chandler and without a word he took it, and began spooning the concoction to Monica, who ate it without taking her eyes off Chandler's face.

He knew that she was staring at him, but he tried by all means to avert her gaze, because although his eyes were now sad and did not have the brightness that he remembered, they were still the most beautiful blue eyes he had ever seen loved.

When she finished eating, Monica leaned back on the head of the bed, looking exhausted, and asked Chandler to sit next to her too on de head of de bed.

He did as she asked, Monica resting her head on Chandler's shoulder and she slowly fell asleep peacefully for the first time in days.

A while later Judy came in and helped Chandler lay her down more comfortably. Monica was fast asleep and didn't notice the movements.

Once out of the room, Chandler told Judy that at least she had fallen asleep, that now he would go to the hotel, but he would return the next morning.

Judy offered if he wanted to have dinner, but he kindly refused, explaining that he was exhausted from the trip and jet lag, that he would go to the hotel to sleep and maybe later order something from room service.

"Son, I'll wait for you tomorrow..."

"Yes Judy, don't hesitate…"

The next day Monica woke up to hearing voices in the living room, she got out of bed to find Judy and Rachel talking.

Monica looked at them with a teary face - "Was Chandler here or was it just a dream,"

"Yes daughter, he came and spent a long time with you, he helped you eat and he waited for you to fall asleep"

Monica asked agitated "But he's coming back...I need to talk to him..."

"Yes Mon," Rachel said, "he went to rest, but surely he'll be back in a while" "Why don't you take a shower and clean yourself up a bit..."

"Yes of course, I'm going to do that, when he came he must have seen me in a mess..."

"Well, he came knowing that you're not in good health, so it doesn't matter how he saw you yesterday, but now it would be nice if he saw you better..." Rachel said.

Monica showered and put on jeans and a T-shirt, and she put on her lip gloss. Despite her paleness, she still looked beautiful. But she was very anxious.

Chandler arrived midmorning with some cookies that he knew Monica liked. Rachel greeted her friend with a hug and left, and Judy went out to shop, leaving the two of them alone.

Monica was shaky, but she was encouraged to tell Chandler that she needed to tell him and she began the story just as she had done with her friends and her mother detail by detail from day one. Chandler listened to her in silence, avoiding looking at her since Monica cried the whole time she spoke and he had never been able to bear to see her cry.

She tried to explain to him what had happened to her, what she had felt, and how wrong she had been in believing that she was chasing a dream that was just a delusion of her confused mind. She repeated that she loved him, that she never stopped loving him, that she unbelievably believed that she loved Richard, but now she knew that was part of the delusion in her head. That she didn't expect him to forgive her, she just needed to tell him what happened to her and hope that he would understand and believe her.

Chandler was silent for a few moments, he was totally overwhelmed and with his wounds bleeding again, then he spoke "... Look Monica, I accept your clarification, I don't know if I will ever be able to understand what you say happened to you, but for now I don't feel that happening..."

Monica was silent, she was immersed in the sadness of having lost him. -

Just at that moment Judy came back, Chandler got up, told them that he had to go because Steve was waiting for him at the Agency….

Monica looked at him with desperate eyes, he backed up to her and she asked if he could get a hug from her old friend Chandler.

"Yes, of course, he said" and she approached and gave him a big hug.

"Monica, get ready tomorrow morning, we're going to go for a walk in the park, you need to get out, and we'll have something to eat somewhere, if you feel like it"

Monica's face brightened, and a soft smile appeared. "Yes of course, it will do me good..."

Judy said, "Son, come have breakfast, I promise I'll make you pancakes the way you like them..."

Chandler smiled at Judy... "OK, okay, see you tomorrow."

Monica told Judy about their conversation, or rather, about her monologue and Chandler's response that stuck in her heart, he didn't think he would ever understand what she says happened to her.

"daughter" Judy said to Monica, taking her hands "you have to give him time, it's the first time they've talked, and obviously he has resentments, he was devastated, he lost trust in you, he felt betrayed, and although if he still feels love for you, it will not make it easy for him to overcome all that pain "

And she continued, "Monica, I don't know how long it will take, I don't even know if he's going to do it, don't create too many expectations, but don't lose all hope either, accept for now to be her friend again, the mother of the children, let him see what you are there for the children and for him, …. and maybe in time..."

"Yes mom, I have to go back to be with the children, and…. have some hope…"

The next day Chandler came over for breakfast and then they went out like Monica walking to the park.

The walk was slow since Monica was still quite weak, her arm and leg wound bothered her, Chandler was going with his hands in his pockets, at first they did it in silence, but then Monica asked about the children and Chandler began to tell about their life there.

They sat for a while in the park to rest.

They talked a long time, Chandler told her about the city, about his new job, about how much fun Jack and Judy were having... and Monica told him about how excellent the cooking class was, she didn't really have any nothing better than telling him and then they had lunch at a McDonald's.

They slowly walked back to Phoebe's apartment, Monica was exhausted, Chandler said goodbye to Judy, and told Monica that the next day he would pick her up to go to Battery Park at mid-morning

During that walk they talked about everything a bit, remembering stories about the kids.

When they are coming back, Chandler told Monica that the next day he had to go back to Honolulu.

"Look, tomorrow I have the flight to go home, the childrens were left alone with your dad, Ross and Manu, the lady who works at home, but we'll keep in touch. Your mom told me that you have an idea of moving to Honolulu, like this that surely you can be there with the children and thus make up for lost time. But for that you have to finish recovering, eat, go for a walk, slee."

Yes I know, the sooner I recover, the sooner I can travel... and thank you for coming to help me, for being here"

"I could not allow the children to lose their mother…"

Monica felt that he was obviously there only as the father of her children, nothing more, and she didn't know if that would be the case forever.

Back in the apartment, they said goodbye with a big hug and another for Judy, who thanked him again for coming.

During all those days, Chandler's nights were plagued by the constant monologues of each of the "two Chandlers" that he has installed in his head.

The truth was that every time their eyes met, in each hug, when she took his hand, his body reacted, his heart fluttered, his hands sweated, he couldn't help it, no matter how hard he tried to silence and ignore the man Magnanimous Chandler, he finished with the last word, undoubtedly he still loved her.

Chandler had worked a lot with Dr. Kalama on the subject of forgiveness, and he had even read in a book that forgiveness is a voluntary and conscious decision, which frees you from negative feelings, such as resentment, anger, pain. As an attitude, forgiving implies being willing to accept that it is one who decides which path to take.

He could choose the path of forgiveness, probably that path was the best way to heal his heart and stop wallowing over and over again in what he had suffered for losing the person he loved and from there to be able to move on with his life... But even when his feelings for her still lingered in his heart, something very different was to trust again. .. and there the other Chandler's monologue won, how are you going to be with someone you don't trust, what's more, how are you going to trust her again, the first and only person you had blindly trusted and betrayed you.

He had no idea how to proceed, he only knew that when Monica moved to Honolulu things would get more difficult. He had achieved a certain peace, his anguish had lessened, but now, with her close to him... how would he...