WHATEVER HAPPENS

Prompt: Fic Lab (#timing)

Date: July 2022

This is the first chapter of a fic that will be going live hopefully later this summer.


The happy little blue cupcakes in the break room were mocking me.

My fingers twitched around the paper plate in my hands. Covered in a bright swirling script—It's a boy!—the plates were also on my list.

"Bella, did you have some food?"

I looked up at Jess, at the spread of miniature-sized foods, and back at her. "Yeah," I croaked. "I'm getting some now."

She nodded, stepping aside as I moved to the counter. Everyone was laughing, either dipping their baby carrots into the ranch or already moving on to the mini corn dogs.

My stomach churned at the sight of all of it.

"Why would anyone purposefully buy baby corn?"

I looked up as Chelsea stepped up beside me, and I smirked. "It's creepy," I agreed.

She glared at the offending food, reaching directly for a chicken satay skewer. "Like corn isn't weird enough when it's full size," she muttered, grabbing a few slices of bell pepper. I plucked a few things onto my plate and turned with her to face the break room. Everyone was fawning over Heidi as she sat in the chair Jess had decorated with Post Its to make it look like a throne.

"God, I wish there was alcohol," Chelsea groaned, taking a bite of the chicken. I glanced at her.

"After-work drinks?"

I didn't drink a whole lot, but on occasion, a few of us went out after work for some drinks. Well, we used to. In the last year, three of the seven women in our office group had gotten pregnant, dwindling our numbers significantly.

"Absolutely," Chelsea grunted, nodding once. "I need something to forget this hellish week."

I winced. Chelsea's lead coordinator had gone out on maternity leave early, leaving her team in the lurch with a massive project. I'd been working overtime to help them out. It had been brutal on all of us.

"Yeah," I grunted, shoving a mushroom into my mouth. "I'm with you."

Chelsea and I leaned against the counter while people fawned over Heidi. I couldn't help my gaze from traveling to her round stomach.

Heidi looked beautiful. She was twenty-six weeks pregnant, and absolutely radiant. It was almost hard to look at her.

"You think they will let us eat a cupcake soon?" Chelsea whispered, nudging my arm. I looked up at her and then at the cupcakes. Each one was topped with a tiny plastic baby.

"Here for the sugar rush?" I asked, glancing back at Chelsea. She snorted.

"Yeah, basically. I need it to get through the rest of my day."

I smiled thinly. I liked Chelsea. We didn't use to be close—though we'd always been friendly—but when women in the office started getting pregnant, Chelsea and I found we had similar senses of humor, and though she was actively avoiding getting pregnant, we had a lot in common.

"I heard that Heidi's husband was flirting with Lauren when he came by the office last week," Chelsea whispered, her voice dropping low to whisper into my ear. I glanced up at her in surprise.

"What?"

She nodded. "According to him, Heidi's 'losing her figure' and that tool is already sniffing around elsewhere. Told Lauren he was 'lonely'." She rolled her eyes. Heidi's husband, Jeff, was notorious around the women in the office, but until recently, Heidi had been able to maintain her perfect image for him. I was disgusted but unsurprised to hear about his behavior.

"She's beautiful," I pointed out to Chelsea.

"Of course she is. She's honestly never been prettier. But that dog doesn't see it. He's an ass wipe."

I glanced across the room at Heidi, wincing slightly. I hoped Chelsea was wrong, but I suspected she was very much right. Jeff was a tool, and Heidi was one of those women that seemed to have pressure on her to make sure everything was always perfect.

Even if no one was looking.

"Poor thing," I whispered, unable to help myself. Chelsea snorted.

"She knew what she was doing when she married him. He's old and disgusting and rich."

It was true. Jeff was almost twice Heidi's age, but I didn't think that meant they were doomed to fail. But Jeff was an unfaithful asshat, and Heidi didn't do confrontations.

My heart squeezed when I thought about what sort of life her son was going to be born into.

"Do you think Jeff wanted the baby?"

I don't know why I asked. It wasn't my business.

Chelsea shifted next to me. "I don't know. I think it's more insurance for Heidi," she said, her voice low. "That kid is Heidi's meal ticket. No matter what happens, even if they divorce, she'll be able to milk Jeff for all he's worth."

I hated the way Chelsea was speaking about the baby, even though he hadn't been born yet and even though she was probably right. Still, it hurt me to think about, and I shifted on the counter, popping a cherry tomato into my mouth.

"Oh, I think they are getting to the cupcakes," Chelsea said, shifting away from the counter before I could try to come up with something to say. She left me where I was leaning, moving across the room to scoop up her slice of sugar.

I stayed rooted where I was, thinking about children being born into families without enough love in them.

At the thought, I pulled my phone out of my pocket, gazing down at the last text message I'd received.

Edward:

I know you took a test to work.

I love you.

My eyes watered as I thought about the pregnancy test I'd taken and discarded twenty minutes later. Another failed attempt.

Another one of my failures.

I hadn't been able to text my husband back yet.

Chelsea came back over, two cupcakes in her hands. She offered me one, and I took it, gazing down at the tiny plastic baby on top.

Before my eyes could fill with tears, I plucked the baby off and shoved the cupcake into my mouth.

As soon as my Bluetooth was connected, I reached for my phone, hitting the dial and settling my phone into the bracket in the cupholder.

The phone rang once before he picked up.

"Bella."

At the sound of his voice, my eyes filled with tears. I took a deep breath, then another, before speaking. "Hey, Babe."

He was quiet for a moment, and I could practically see him thinking.

"I'm sorry," he said gently.

My eyes squeezed shut and I leaned my forehead against the steering wheel. I didn't want to cry, not again.

I took a minute to gather myself before taking a deep breath and sitting up. "I'm going out for a drink with Chelsea," I told him, wiping at the tears falling. "Just one. I won't be home late."

He cleared his throat.

"Of course, Babe. Have a good time."

I felt like crying again, so I took a deep breath and reached for my phone. "I'll see you later."

He hummed. "I love you."

My eyes squeezed shut. "I love you too."

We hung up and I took a couple of deep breaths, trying to steady myself. When I felt like the tears were subsided, I set my phone down and put my car into reverse.

The drive to the bar helped to calm me down, and by the time I got there, I felt better.

I met Chelsea inside, who had managed to snag a table despite the after-work rush that was pouring in. I went to the bar to order my drink, and when I had my glass of wine, I headed to Chelsea's table.

"A room full of dicks and not one I'd pounce on," she grunted. I snorted, barely able to stop myself from choking on my wine and she grinned. I glanced around the room and winced.

"Maybe the bartender?" I hedged.

"Gay," she sighed. I smirked. Chelsea loved her independent single life, and I found that I loved living vicariously through her.

"I'll keep a steady eye on the door," I promised her. She nodded, sipping her drink. It looked like it might be an Old Fashioned, and I winced. No way could I drink anything stronger than wine in a casual setting.

"Okay, so," Chelsea said, grabbing my attention. I looked at her. "What's the deal with the long face today?"

I swallowed my wine, trying to weigh if I really wanted to get into it with her. She wouldn't push if I told her I didn't want to talk about it, but part of me wanted to process things before I saw Edward.

I was tired of taking things out on him.

"Another negative pregnancy test," I told her, setting my glass on the table. I kept hold of it, letting my fingers fiddle with the stem.

Chelsea sighed, sitting back. "I'm really sorry, Bella."

I glanced up at her, shrugging.

"It makes four in the last two months."

Her eyebrows rose. "Wow, so you guys are like, actually trying."

I nodded, bringing my wine glass to my lips and taking a longer sip. "Yup," I said, my voice hollow when I set the glass down again.

"Have you seen a doctor about it?"

I didn't want to get into my medical history, so I just shrugged. "We're looking into things," I said vaguely. "But the only thing certain right now is I'm really bad at getting knocked up."

Chelsea frowned. "That was my brother and his wife," she said, nodding slowly. "Tried for years. Went through all the testing and they couldn't figure it out. After spending thousands of dollars and countless hours with doctors, they took a month-long vacation to get away from the stress of it all. When they came back, she was pregnant with twins."

I felt my eyebrows dip as I stared at her, trying to imagine getting pregnant with twins. "That's amazing."

Chelsea's eyes widened. "Not that I'm saying you are doing anything wrong or that Fiji is a magical baby-making place," she said, waving her hands in front of her face. "Just, you know. Timing has something to do with it all."

I didn't respond. I wasn't quite sure what I wanted to say.

It seemed like Chelsea wasn't sure either, because she sighed and knocked back the rest of her drink. "I'm an ass and I'll stop talking about it," she grunted.

I smiled a little. "I'm sorry. I'm all Debbie Downer tonight. I'll perk up, I promise."

She shook her head. "You don't have to apologize for having feelings, Bella."

This right here was why Chelsea was a good friend. She seemed to be pretty superficial, but in reality, she was incredibly compassionate and kind.

It helped, knowing I was allowed to feel my feels around her, and by the time I was done with my wine, I felt a little better.

Chelsea even managed to make me laugh a few times by providing commentary on the men around us. None of it was flattering, but her silliness made me feel better.

When we left the bar, Chelsea was sadly alone, but she offered me a tight hug and suggested going out again, but next time somewhere with a hotter clientele.

I promised her I'd go, and we parted ways for the night.

By the time I got in my car, I felt okay. I wasn't suddenly happy, but I wasn't drowning in my feelings.

The car ride was long—traffic was horrible—and the time in the car let me slip back into my feels. I wasn't quite sad, just heavy with my thoughts.

All I wanted was the comfort of my husband.

I pulled up to our house, parking on the thin driveway and scooping up my things from the passenger's seat.

I climbed out of my car, nudging the door shut with my hip while I situated my purse on my shoulder. I headed inside, focused on getting inside and seeing Edward.

I twisted my key ring in my hands, looking for our house key as I walked up the front path. We'd been living in a small, two-bedroom townhome for nearly six years now. It was lovely, but I hoped to one day grow out of it.

I unlocked the door, stooping to pick up an Amazon package that was sitting on the porch.

"Hey!" I shouted, stepping into the house. A peel of laughter answered me, and I looked up in time to see two of my nephews running full steam towards me. I held up my hands in surprise, trying to brace myself as well as I could in my heels.

"Aunt Bella!" Seth, the oldest, cheered, squeezing me around the waist. The kid was getting huge, and even though he was six, it looked like he was going to be taller than me soon.

"Hey, Seth," I said, mussing his hair. A second later, Riley crashed into me, squeezing my knees. I grinned and stooped down to hug him too. He was four and hadn't quite gotten the height Seth had always had.

"Auntie Bella, we have our legos! Do you want to see them?" Seth asked. I pulled myself out of their grasp slightly.

"I'd love to."

Seth cheered and ran off, while Riley took my hand, leading me toward the living room. I turned the corner and on the sofa was Rosalie, my sister-in-law, with my fourteen-month-old niece, Maggie.

"Hey, Rose," I said, coming to sit next to her on the sofa. I set my purse on the dining room table before plopping next to her.

"Hey, Bella," she said, sounding exhausted. I held out my arms and Maggie reached for me, a big smile on her round face. I pulled her into my arms, peppering her with kisses. "I'm sorry to have circus here when you got home from work," Rose said, waving to the piles of toys in the living room. I shook my head.

"Nonsense. You know how much I love to see you all." I told her, situating Maggie in my lap. She was trying to wriggle free to join her brothers, but since the boys were working with little lego pieces, I kept her on the sofa with me.

Rose gave me a small smile. "How are you?"

I looked up at her.

"Fine," I said, not sure what she was really asking. She tilted her head slightly, and I sighed. "Did Edward ask you to talk to me?"

Before she could answer, my husband was coming into the living room carrying a tray with several cups of water in various stages of childproof containers.

"Hey," he said, his eyes cutting to me as he set the water on the coffee table.

"Hey," I said, keeping my voice light. I could see he wasn't quite sure how to read my mood, which was fair. I still wasn't quite sure how I was feeling.

"Thanks, Ed," Rose said, leaning forward and taking a large sip of her water.

Edward moved around the coffee table, coming to sit near me. Immediately, Maggie abandoned my lap to crawl toward Edward. She absolutely adored her uncle.

Edward scooped her into his arms, and my heart ached and fluttered watching him with her. He was so good with kids.

He would be an amazing father.

"So what brings you over?" I asked, tearing my gaze from Edward and Maggie and turning to Rose. She sipped her water once more before nodding.

"Edward was watching the boys while I took Maggie to an appointment."

I glanced at my husband who was happily lost to the child in his lap. "I didn't realize they were here or I would have been home sooner," I said, watching him. He glanced up at me and offered me a small smile before turning his attention back to Maggie.

Rose cleared her throat. "How is work going?"

I considered how much to tell her. Rose and I were close, though we hadn't had a lot of time lately to catch up. "Busy, but one team is almost caught up again and my team is still running along."

"I can't believe how much slack you've had to pick up," Rose said, shaking her head. "They shouldn't put it all on you."

I sighed. "Well, I'm available, and it's not like we can ask them not to be pregnant," I pointed out. Rose looked up at me quickly, and I looked away from her. We all knew the conversation was edging around some difficult territory.

"Still," Rose said slowly. "They should hire more help."

I shrugged and stood from the sofa. "I'm going to make a cup of tea," I announced, heading out of the living room and stepping into the kitchen. I took a few deep breaths while I filled the kettle and set it on the stove. I grabbed a mug, setting it on the counter. I looked up when I heard Rose come into the kitchen.

"I'm sorry," she said, catching me by surprise and pulling me into a hug. "I'll butt out." She squeezed me gently. "I'm going to take my kids home before they destroy your house. Call me if you need to talk, okay?"

She pulled back and looked me in the eye. I nodded, taking a deep breath.

"Yeah, thanks, Rose."

She kissed my cheek before turning and gathering her children. I could hear Edward helping her get everyone to the car, and I focused on making my tea.

In a few short minutes, the house fell silent and the lack of noise filled me with a deep feeling of remorse.

"Bella?"

I wiped my eyes before turning to face Edward. He was standing across the kitchen, watching me with a frown on his face.

"I'm just tired," I tried to tell him.

He stepped toward me, and our kitchen was so small that I was now within arm's reach. He pulled me against his chest, and I sank into his embrace, pressing my face to his shirt.

"Why isn't it happening?"

"Shh," he whispered, rubbing my back. "Bella, it'll happen. We can't rush things like this. We'll keep trying, okay?"

He didn't get it. He didn't have a ticking clock over his head, telling him with each negative pregnancy test that time was running out.

I took a breath, pressing my face against his chest harder.

"We'll keep trying, okay?" He murmured, pressing a kiss to my head.

"We'll keep trying," I repeated.

"We'll get there, Bella. It's just going to take time and patience."

I took a breath and pulled away from him, wiping at my eyes.

"Yeah," I said quietly. "Time and patience."