Chapter Title: Meditate
Series Title: Unlikely Brothers
Ages in this chapter: Tanner (12 - present day) and (7 - flashback), Dashen (18)
Chapter Summary: Tanner's latest attempt to get Dashen to learn about meditation, leads to a flashback of his first weeks as a Jedi apprentice.
"Come on, Dash! It's relaxing and will take all your stress away. I swear it."
"We've been though this and I am not sitting and staring at walls with you. Keep your boring crap on your side of the apartment. I thought Jedi roamed the galaxy and sliced up bad guys with lightsabers. The picture you paint makes your kind sound like the most dull and drab people to ever exist in the galaxy."
Tanner pulled at his brother's arm, forcing him down to sit. A slight bit of unexpected Force strength behind it gave Dashen less ability to resist and he landed hard on his rear.
"Damn it, Mouse. I am not doing this. If I wanted to sleep sitting up, I would sleep sitting up."
"It's not sleeping. It's meditation. Eyes closed. Deep breaths. Stilling your mind."
"You've always been like this, haven't you?" Dashen asked, shaking his head and meeting the eyes of his little brother.
"Like what?"
"Eager. Excited. Especially about the boring things in life."
"Yes. Master Ayden used to encourage it."
"He was a patient man. You were lucky to have him."
"I was. And this helps me remember him."
"Your butt on the floor staring at the wall."
"Yes." Tanner's grin was big and genuine and it lit up his face. It served only to make Dashen laugh. "You still love me though."
"I do, little brother. I really do. But how about instead of forcing me to live through something that will bore me out of my skull and beyond - and who knew that was possible, right? How about instead, you tell me a story. Did you and Ayden ever talk about mediation when you were an apprentice? I'm sure you did, because the next best thing about doing meditation is talking about doing mediation - worlds help me for asking this."
"We did! A lot. But the first time was when I was seven and it was only a couple weeks after he took me as an apprentice."
Forgetting the dullness of the subject for a moment, Dash watched the boy's face brighten at just the mention of Ayden's name. He wanted to encourage it. He always wanted to encourage it. Talking about the past. The good memories. It was something that was so important to both of them.
"Good. Tell me about it."
"Really?"
"Really."
"I love this! Okay, I was new to being his apprentice and only seven, so I wasn't sure how long I should mediate for or how long Master Ayden wanted me to mediate for it how this master and apprentice thing worked really...so..."
—-
Into the past...
Composed and polite in his actions, the boy waited patiently for the man to finish the task at hand and turn his attention toward him. Once that attention came...
"Master Ayden, how long would you like me to meditate? My crèche teacher had us almost up to an hour. How long can you meditate for? Should I meditate the same time as you or do I meditate at different times? Do you know how long..."
"Tannerlin?"
"Yes, Master?"
"Relax." Responded Jedi Master Ayden Yen, releasing his dark brown shoulder length hair from it's tie and ruffling it to allow it to hang straight. Eyes of the same color latched onto those of his new apprentice. "So many questions you have and I will answer every single one, I promise. But you have been my Padawan for less than two weeks. We have much to learn about each other, including all about meditation. My habits. Your habits. I want to know all about you as you want to know all about me. All right? All right. So, how about we take the first of your questions. How long for meditation."
"I do have a lot of questions, Master. I promise to stop asking them all at once, but I'm so happy to be a padawan. I'm so happy to be your padawan."
"And I am very happy to be your teacher. May we have many years together as master and apprentice. But for now... meditation."
The small boy was smiling. Full attention on Ayden Yen. Waiting to listen. Wanting to learn. His light brown eyes curious, interested, yearning. His young seven year old senses completely attuned to anything that Ayden would say.
Ayden took a spot on the floor; a blue cushioned mat where he practiced his own meditation. He'd recently brought in a second mat of similar color that fit his apprentice just right. With his left hand, the man patted the smaller cushion.
"Sit with me, young one."
"Yes, Master." Tannerlin hurried to the spot, immediately mimicking the comfortable cross-legged position of his teacher.
"Tell me what you learned from your crèche master."
"We were taught to sit carefully, to focus on a place far in front of us, breathe deep and then close our eyes until our minds were quiet enough to reach for the Force. I wasn't always good at it, but I got better. My mind always got filled with questions that would come up and I wanted to ask and know the answers, so it made me not focus very good. Did that ever happen to you when you were young, Master?"
Ayden laughed gently. The enthusiasm this boy had. It had begun as nerves their first two days together, then mutated into natural avidity, which was apparently the young Jedi's natural state of being. Having engaged in several long conversations with the crèche master, Ayden had been provided with a solid portrait of the child that was Tannerlin Vai; the type that once he felt at ease with someone, he gave them his undivided attention and his unconditional love. The second, perhaps not the perfect trait for a Jedi - especially in war time - but the crèche master, she'd made it perfectly clear to Ayden that no one - not anyone with a good soul at least - would ever regret being thrust into the life of Tannerlin Vai. He was absolute pure goodness and love through and through.
"I'm sure I had difficulty with mediation when I was younger," the man finally replied. "It's been quite some time ago, details are fuzzy. Tell me what do you do when your focus starts to wander with all those mind-filling questions?"
"Well, I used to just ask the questions out loud, but the crèche master instructed me that was not the correct thing to do. So then I would just sit quietly until meditation was over and asked my questions after the other students were gone."
"Were all of your questions answered?"
"Well... not really. I think I had too many."
Another gentle laugh and Ayden set a hand on the boy's shoulder. "You are quite a young man. Most your age are either too nervous or uncertain to speak so freely with a Jedi Master. You just spill it right out there for all to see, don't you?"
Tannerlin shrugged. "I do. I can't help it. I like to know and learn and think and ask and well... I just always want to know the answers when I have questions about something. And I want to know about all the things in the galaxy. Is it okay to be that way, Master?"
"It certainly is. And I want to answer as many questions as I can. But know that there are correct times to ask and incorrect times to ask. It all depends on the circumstances. I will instruct you on that as best I can, and if I am ever quick to hush you..."
"Then I know to stop talking." Sitting tall, back straight, his pale brown eyes met the darker browns of Ayden. "Right?"
"Indeed, That is correct. Now, turn your head forward. I will show you how I best meditate. Eventually you will settle on what works for you. My suggestion would be for you to focus on short sessions. I strongly suspect that your mind starts filling with questions when it's been quiet for too long and your thoughts start wandering."
"That's exactly what happens! How did you know? Master, you know a lot about me already."
"Like you, I pay attention to everything around me. But for now I want you to stay quiet and listen and follow. Ready?"
"I'm ready."
"Good. Face forward. Eyes closed. Shoulders relaxed. Hands in your lap. Don't focus on the Force. Focus on our bond. Even in it's infancy, it is quite strong. Allow me to lead you into the Force. It will help relax your mind. Slow, deep and steady breaths. Follow me, Padawan. That's good... follow me..."
Twenty minutes passed. Long moments of complete silence. Complete relaxation. No questions. No broken focus.
"Tannerlin. Open your eyes. Tell me how you feel."
Slowly emerging from the rumination, a broad smile extended across the boy's face. He turned on his mat to face Ayden directly. "Master, I feel really good. I didn't have any questions and I meditated the whole time!"
"Twenty minutes. Three times a day. That's where I want you to start on your own."
"I can do that, I can! It felt so nice without all those questions filling my brain."
"Questions are never bad nor wrong. There are simply certain times when your focus must remain on the task at hand. After meditation, I will answer anything you wish. But for those twenty minutes..."
"I focus on the Force!"
"Exactly."
"And if I mess up, it's okay. I just try again and you won't be disappointed in me."
"I will never be disappointed in you as long as you try your best."
The pair stood and walked to the kitchenette area of their compact apartment. Ayden offered his apprentice a cool drink from the chiller.
Their height difference significant - Tannerlin always small for his age - averaging a few inches shorter than his age group - it didn't seem to phase the boy's attention to those he bonded with. He accepted the drink gladly and asked, "Master, do you think we will be a great Jedi team one day? Missions all over the galaxy? Or do you think the war will go on for a long time and we will have to fight in it?"
There went the thinking again, Ayden smiled.
"We will be an excellent team, Tannerlin, in whatever and wherever we are assigned. If being part of the war is to be our destiny, I will keep you from it as long as I am able to allow you time to grow and learn and become all that you can be. That I can promise. The rest... is up to the Force on where it will lead us."
"I hope we get to do great things and help people all over the galaxy."
"I don't know how far you will reach in your life, Padawan, but I suspect wherever you do reach, it will be highly meaningful."
"But first I will practice my meditation and sparring and studies and..."
"And whatever else comes your way, I'm certain. For now, how about we get you ready to head out to morning class. Finish your drink and grab your training saber. You've got fifteen minutes."
Moments later, Tannerlin hurried to his room to retrieve his training saber. He had not yet reached the point just yet where he would get his own lightsaber, but that privilege would be soon enough. The training saber clicked onto his belt.
"See you soon, Padawan. I look forward to hearing all about everything you learn this morning."
"Really?"
"Really. Now, run along."
"Master, will you meditate with me later?"
"Indeed I will. Hurry now, go. Don't be late."
"Okay, Bye, Master!"
—-
...PRESENT DAY...
"I can remember it all so clear. Those first lessons Master Ayden taught me, I never forgot."
"Wasn't but a few years ago, Mouse. Seems forever though, doesn't it?"
"Yeah. It does. But I'd like you to try one day, Dash. To meditate, but I get it that it's not your thing."
The older boy stood and grabbed a drink from the chiller, handing it off to the younger. "Tanner, you know I would do anything in the galaxy for you, but sitting on my butt gawking at walls for hours on end in complete stillness and silence? Hard pass now and hard pass for the rest of our lives. Surprisingly though, I do enjoy the stories. Kossi would've stared at walls with you, I can say that for a fact. Come on, let's do something fun in town this evening and I'll share some stories of my own. Oh and we exit through the front door." Dashen ran for the stairs.
Tanner set his drink down and dashed after his brother. "Dash, you go through the front door and Colton will kill you,"
"Eh, he'll have to catch me first and he's been looking a little flabby lately. Hurry, Mouse. Last one out the door sleeps with swamp rats."
"Sleeps with wait... What?"
"Don't ask me, Kossi always used to yell that when he wanted to race me. The kid loved running, but he loved swamp rats more, which made it all the more strange."
Pushing each other down the steps, Tanner blabbed, "I know all about swamps rats, they don't really live in swamps, they live in sewer water and..."
"Tanner, not now. Colton's coming, hurry, go go go go. Front door ahead!"
The large and irritated voice boomed from another room at the ruckus created by thundering feet on hard stairs. "Damn it, Dashen, if you and your brother are pounding around in my house..."
The pair cleared the door just as the large hand swatted at Dashen's head and missed. They ran. They laughed. They laughed as they ran.
"He almost got you, Dash." Tanner breathed out hard to catch his breath. "If you took time to meditate once in a while and focus on your mental well being, your physical well being will follow."
"Mental, physical what? What the hell are you rambling on about?"
"Meditation."
"I'm gonna meditate you if you keep it up, little brother."
"I don't think that's possible to meditate someone else. But..."
"No buts," Dashen shot a friendly swat at the back of Tanner's head, "...especially if my butt is on the floor staring at a wall."
Tanner leapt off the ground the swatted him back... or tried to. Dashen's height and Tanner's lack of height made that game rather one sided.
"One day, Dash."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Hey, my turn for story time. Let's walk. Let's talk. I've got some good ones for you, little brother."
END
