The night could be lonely. It was strange, Cinder had never found that to be particularly true in the past, and yet on this night it was the only word she could find to describe how she was feeling. She lay in her bed, staring blankly at the wooden wall across from her in the small cabin she'd been assigned when Ruby and her boarded this boat. The only sounds that of her own shallow breathing, and of the ocean so very close by.

It had been easy enough getting passage to Vale, even on short notice. Ships were leaving that way regularly, and with times as they were, it seemed captains were very eager for the added protection a pair of huntress passengers could provide. Or, one huntress and one unlicensed but very skilled combatant, in this case. So eager, in fact, that the captain they'd approached even offered the two women their own private rooms for the duration of the journey.

Privacy. That was something Cinder hadn't really had for some time now. The whole duration of their journey she and Ruby had been more or less joined at the hip, hiking together every day and sleeping in close proximity every night. Even on the occasions when they'd stopped over in towns, slept at inns, they'd always ended up sharing a room for one reason or another. It was a little funny in retrospect, the way Cinder had constantly felt annoyed about that whenever it happened, had always wished for some time to herself. And now she had it. And here she was, laying awake, staring at a wall.

Maybe it wasn't fair to say that she'd never found nights to be lonely before. Certainly, they had always been that way during her childhood, and that didn't change during her time with Salem. It was just… back then, that had just been the default. Her nights always felt like that, and her days weren't exactly better. Now though, she'd experienced something different. It turns out that it's hard to give that up once you've tasted it.

She shifted position for probably the first time that night, rolling over to stare at the ceiling rather than the wall. The change in perspective didn't seem to do anything for her mood however, nor did it make it any easier for her to drift off to sleep. Maybe, though, it would be good for her to start getting used to this again. These last few months had been… eye opening. Had shown her a life that she never thought was possible for her. Had given her a sense of hope that even now seemed to warm her from within. And yet, it wasn't as if she could just follow Ruby around forever, was it?

What are you going to do when this is all over?

It was a question Ruby had posed her a little while ago, and one she now found herself returning to with increasing frequency. Some day, she would have to make a choice. So what would she do? What could she do? A broken maiden, a wanted criminal. Maybe she could just lay low? There were farming communities scattered about every kingdom's territory, isolated and as peaceful as any place could get. She could hide away, somewhere no-one knew her face and no-one would ever find her. Have a little house to herself, grow her own food, live out her days in peace. But no, that wasn't the kind of life that she could ever stomach leading, for so many reasons. There had to be something she was more suited for.

Back when she'd first had this conversation with Ruby, she'd confessed her childhood desire to be a huntress. Travelling the world, seeing the sights, maybe saving the occasional child from monsters. It didn't sound so bad. Exciting, free, a way to atone for her sins, even if only a little.

But at the same time, just like the farm, it did sound so terribly lonely.

So, what then? The answer seemed obvious, practically staring her right in the face. Or at least, what she wanted the answer to be. She cared about Ruby in a way that she never thought she could care about anyone, and it seemed that Ruby truly cared about her in turn. But that didn't mean they could just keep travelling together like this forever.

What they had in the short term could last, at least. Cinder had made a promise that she would help Ruby going forward, support her through whatever came their way. And she would. She'd repay the kindness that Ruby had shown her over the course of this journey. And when that all came to an end? Well, ultimately the answer was simple. Come what may, Cinder didn't want to have to be separated from Ruby.

That was a nice thought. Cinder wasn't entirely sure what Ruby planned for her future, but if she had to guess it would involve being a huntress to at the very least some degree. Maybe they could travel together, just like now? Exploring, hiking along roads less travelled, visiting out of the way towns, and always happening to end up sleeping in the same room. A life of excitement, never knowing what the next day would bring. Free to travel where the winds would take them, and to indulge Ruby's love for heroics whenever they came across innocents in need.

Or maybe Ruby would prefer to settle down? They could live together, then. A small home, far enough away from one of the kingdoms that they'd have peace and quiet, but close enough that they could travel in to find work regularly. When they weren't out doing huntress missions they could relax together, curl up by a woodfire and enjoy each other's company. Maybe even adopt a pet or two, Cinder seemed to remember Ruby mentioning something about a fondness for dogs. She'd never had a pet before. That seemed nice.

It all seemed nice, really. As Cinder's mind drifted, set the scene, watched herself curling close to Ruby together on an imaginary couch in an imaginary house, wrapping her up in a tight hug, she felt her heart flutter and her cheeks warm. It was a weird feeling, one that she couldn't say that she was overly familiar with. Or at least, not until she started travelling with Ruby. Since then, it had come a handful of times, usually whenever they were close together, or when Ruby was giving her encouragement, or… often just when she was thinking about Ruby. But never this strong, and never had she indulged in it so. She couldn't say that it was unpleasant though, even as her stomach seemed to fill itself with butterflies. Actually, she quite liked it. This was the kind of future that she could look forward to.

That was, of course, all assuming that Ruby would have her.

Those warm feelings gradually ground to a halt. It… was a question worth considering. Ruby cared about Cinder; that was a fact that she'd slowly and painfully managed to accept. But there were lots of people that Ruby cared about, that was just the kind of person she was, it didn't mean that she'd want to spend the rest of her life with Cinder.

Cinder's head slowly rolled to the side, looking down at what remained of her left arm. She was a mess. A broken, failed maiden, one whose powers had fled for reasons that she couldn't begin to understand. A woman so tormented by her own thoughts that she struggled to even function. Surely Ruby wouldn't ever want her that way.

Cinder screwed her eye shut, growling in frustration. And now here she was, falling into another pit of negativity. She'd grown better at identifying these, at the very least. Better at pulling herself out when she fell into one. It was never easy though. The voices in her head weren't exactly keen on letting her off easily, always there to remind her of her flaws, of how foolhardy she was being for ever believing that things could be different. For ever believing that she could change. It was especially hard when she was alone like this, when they were her only companions.

She shook her head, another small growl slipping out as she tried to banish those thoughts by force. One lingered incessantly, however, although thankfully one of the less painful ones. That last thought that she'd had, the idea that Ruby would never want her that way. The same way that she wanted Ruby. The question was, then, what way was that?

It'd be a lie to say that Cinder had ever been particularly in touch with her emotions. Or… well, she'd been in touch with some of them, but only in a way that Ruby would no doubt describe as 'unhealthy.' But what she was feeling now was something that she pointedly did not recognise. She knew that she was fond of Ruby, that she cared for her, that she enjoyed being around her. Ruby had little by little worked her way past every wall that Cinder threw up in her way, until eventually she'd managed to occupy a very singular place in her heart. She was without a doubt the first person that Cinder could genuinely think of as… as a friend, across her entire life.

But as a result these feelings, these experiences, these desires that all ran rampant through Cinder's mind were completely alien to her. She'd simply never felt this way about someone before. It became near impossible for her to interpret them beyond their most basic meaning. It left her floundering for answers that seemed constantly out of her reach, answers to a question that seemed so simple. What did Ruby mean to her?

Not so long ago, the answer would have been simple. Ruby was her enemy, her nemesis even. Someone she hated with a burning passion. Someone who she wanted to suffer. Then, things had changed, and she'd become a tenuous ally, aligned out of chance and convenience rather than choice. And then she'd become more, and more, until now… now… was she just a friend? No, somehow that rang false, or at least not entirely true. It was something more, something she just couldn't put into words.

It was frustrating, and wonderful, and exciting, and somehow terrifying, all at the same time. And yet, it seemed there was simply nothing she could do about it. No amount of wracking her brains and beating herself up emotionally in the middle of the night brought her closer to any kind of clarity.

She let her eye drift back open, the sight of the plain wooden wall greeting her once more. It seemed she was back where she'd started once more. How annoying. She couldn't tell exactly what time it was, but by all accounts the night was far from over, and still sleep refused to take her. Maybe she needed a change of scenery, a short walk. It probably wouldn't actually help, but at the very least it'd be better than just laying here any longer.

Slowly, she pushed herself up, swinging her legs out over the edge of her cot. Despite her inability to actually sleep, drowsiness still plucked at her senses, head swimming as she attempted to get up. Or maybe that wasn't just in her head, she was still yet to properly adjust to the constant motions of the boat as it sailed, and one particularly sudden movement sent her stumbling into the wall that she'd spent so long staring at.

Hopefully whoever was sleeping in the cabin next to hers wasn't woken up by that, although ultimately she couldn't bring herself to care all that much. Carefully, she took short steps one at a time, until she was at her door. That first goal accomplished, she pushed it open and stepped out into the hallway beyond, and then from there out onto the ship's main deck.

She was welcomed by a gust of cool sea air that made her arm's stump ache. Annoying, but still not as bad as laying in her room slowly going crazy. Idly, she began strolling across the deck to the ship's prow, gradually growing more accustomed to the unsteady footing as she went. When she eventually reached her destination, however, someone she was decidedly not expecting was waiting for her.

Ruby stood alone up at the prow, her cloak pulled tight around her to protect against the chill of the night, gaze fixed on the sky above, staring unfalteringly. The moon and stars overhead shone down on her, the low light giving her an almost ethereal look that left Cinder's mouth feeling strangely dry.

Cinder couldn't look away, whatever thoughts had been running through her head moments ago now scattered to the wind. The loneliness that had been dominating her night up till now fell away at the mere sight of her companion, and she had to restrain the embarrassing urge that nearly overtook her to race right over to her side. No, clamp down on those feelings, better to seem casual.

She swallowed quickly, attempting to wet her throat after its earlier sudden dryness, and then spoke with as much ease as she could muster. "Couldn't sleep?"

Ruby was clearly surprised by the intrusion, spinning around to face Cinder with wide eyes. Her expression turned sheepish a moment later, realising that she'd been discovered. "Ah, yeah, I couldn't. Guess you're… well, in the same boat?"

Cinder tragically failed to stifle her small snort of amusement at that, which she was sure gave Ruby a massive ego boost. "Yes, I was having some trouble," she replied while stepping forward, moving up to stand beside Ruby at the prow, "Thought some fresh air might help."

Part of her wanted to be open about exactly why she couldn't sleep, about her loneliness, and… about how happy she felt as soon as she saw Ruby waiting for her. Another part of her wondered if Ruby's reasons were the same as hers, if she'd been feeling just as lonely, been missing Cinder's presence. But, she refrained from vocalising any of those thoughts, instead just looking up to the sky, admiring the moon shining above her.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Ruby spoke softly, barely audible above the noise of the ocean, and yet Cinder hung on every word.

She was right, of course. Cinder couldn't really say she'd ever been one for admiring natural beauty, or any beauty for that matter. It just never really felt worth the time, always felt pointless next to everything else. But now she really stopped and just looked, letting all her other thoughts and worries fall away in favour of taking in the sight before her. "It really is," she breathed out softly, looking over towards Ruby only to be met with a sight just as beautiful as the stars above. Twin silver eyes gazing at her, and that familiar warm smile that she adored.

As she looked more closely, though, Cinder noticed something strange. Ruby's hair was quite wet, like it had been completely soaked and then hastily dried, and on top of that her skin seemed damp too. She was also shivering slightly beneath her cloak, even though it wasn't all that cold right now. It was almost like…

"Did you fall into the water?" Cinder asked incredulously, not understanding how Ruby could've possibly managed that but at the same time being unable to disregard the evidence before her.

Ruby flushed with embarrassment at the question. "Oh, uh, not quite. I actually tried going for a swim. Not really my best idea," she finished with an awkward chuckle.

Cinder blinked slowly, then asked the only question that she could think of. "Why?"

"Well, I thought it might be a good way to clear my head a little, cool myself down. But uh, turns out it was just kinda miserable." Ruby paused, scratching at the back of her hair and clearly noticing how damp it still was. "Tried to dry myself off, but I guess I didn't do a great job, huh?"

"Let me help." Cinder spoke practically without thinking. Before Ruby could answer, Cinder had already closed the small distance between them and wrapped the huntress up in a tight hug. She settled her hand against the back of Ruby's head, and then activated her semblance at a low level, letting the gentle heat begin to dry Ruby off completely.

Ruby was, understandably, surprised by this development. She stammered unintelligibly for a few moments, before resigning herself to her fate and pressing closer into Cinder's body. "Thanks," she managed eventually, nuzzling slightly against Cinder's chest.

Obviously, Cinder didn't technically need to hold Ruby like this to help dry her; however after everything tonight she'd been more than a little desperate for a hug, and as embarrassing as it was to admit, she just couldn't help herself. Memories of a possible future, that idea of her and Ruby living together and holding one another, flashed in her mind as she held tight, sending her heart fluttering against her ribcage. "It's no problem. I like being close to you." She fell quiet for a moment, listening to the soft sound of the ocean around them, and of Ruby breathing against her. But then, little by little, memories of Ruby pulling away from her, refusing this kind of contact in the past began to crop up, gradually drowning out her hopes for the future. "As… long as it's something you're okay with."

Ruby stiffened, and then sagged just a little with regret. "I'm more than okay with it, really. I'm sorry if I've ever made you think otherwise." She clearly understood Cinder's fear, and by way of reassurance slipped her arms around Cinder's back, holding her in turn. "I just…" she trailed off for a few moments, before letting out a low sigh and falling silent.

Cinder waited for a few moments, until it seemed clear that Ruby wasn't going to continue. "It's the thing you can't talk about, right?"

Ruby was quiet for a few moments longer, an internal debate over whether to say more or keep silent clearly raging within her. Eventually though, she pulled back just a touch, only enough that she could look up and meet Cinder's lone eye. "It's… I want you to be happy, Cinder. It's important to me. You're important to me. I just worry sometimes that I'll hurt you, even if I don't mean to." She swallowed deeply after that, the words clearly a struggle to force out, but then continued before Cinder could interject. "And I know that you're strong, never doubt that, but you've just spent so long being hurt by everyone in your life. You deserve so much better than that, and I'm just… scared. Scared that I'll be just like everyone you've had before."

Cinder stared back into Ruby's eyes as she processed the information. It was more than Ruby had been willing to tell her before, albeit not by much. She'd known already that Ruby felt that whatever problem it was that she had, it would hurt Cinder to know about it. But the fear that lay beneath that, exactly why the idea of causing Cinder pain hurt Ruby so much, that was new, and hopefully that was something that she could help with.

"Ruby," she breathed out softly, "When this all started, when I saved you from Salem, I did it because I realised something. I'd become just like the people who hurt me when I was young, and Salem… well, she'd been that way all along. Hurting you, and others, just to feel powerful, just to revel in your suffering. That's what made them all so terrible, they beat me down because they enjoyed how it felt, and it's what made me so terrible too." She paused for a beat, struggling to keep her thoughts in order even as memories she'd rather not relive once more flashed in her mind. "But you're not like that. Even if you end up hurting me, the fact that you're already this regretful just proves that you aren't like them in the slightest. You don't need to be scared of that."

"It still wouldn't change the fact that you'd be hurt either way, because of me." Ruby's reply was quiet, and yet maybe a bit more hopeful than she'd sounded just before.

"I've hurt you in the past, more than once." Cinder gently slid her hand round from Ruby's now dry hair to instead cup her cheek. She wasn't sure why, but it just felt right. "You stood by my side anyway. I'll do the same for you, if it really comes to it. Trust me."

Ruby was frozen, struggling between her fears and hopes, before eventually, slowly, she leaned into Cinder's hand and let out a breath that she'd been holding. "Thank you, Cinder. I… still don't think I can talk about it. But I will, I promise. I just need to figure out how to say it first."

That warmed Cinder to hear. A part of her felt sure that knowing exactly what it was that Ruby was feeling, what it was that had been running through her head this whole time, would put her own feelings into perspective in turn. Would make everything just click into place. That part of her was desperate to know now, but… she could wait a little while longer. For Ruby's sake.

Speaking of Ruby, a thought seemed to be forming in the girl in question's mind, even as her cheeks grew visibly red. "Hey, Cinder," she spoke slowly, warmth that had been absent from her voice now returning in full force, "I was actually having trouble sleeping in the first place because… well, it just felt kinda strange to be separated from you. If it's alright, could you come back with me, maybe spend the rest of the night in my room?"

The suggestion made Cinder's cheeks flush in turn, yet she was already nodding eagerly all the same. "It was the same reason for me, to be honest," she admitted, before gently pulling away from Ruby and taking a few steps back towards the cabins. She felt happy, warm and light and hopeful in that special way that only Ruby could make her feel. "Lets go, I'm sure we can both find a way to fit in that bed somehow."