Chapter Seventy-Nine
Charlie was seated on the sofa when Joey arrived home. There was one lamp on but otherwise, the police officer was shrouded in darkness. She didn't look up when she heard her girlfriend enter the house. She kept her head in her hands. A large glass of wine was on the table.
"I caught the bus home by the way," Joey said bitterly. "You know, in case you cared."
"Of course I care," Charlie said quietly.
Still she did not turn round. Joey folded her arms across her tummy.
"Really? Because you've got a funny way of showing it."
"Joey, I'm..." Charlie began, turning around to face her.
"What? Sorry?"
"Yes."
Charlie swallowed uncertainly. She didn't think she'd ever seen Joey looked so angry before.
"Well, you know what, Charlie? I don't forgive you. You humiliated me tonight. You spoke about me like I'm a piece of meat to be traded to anyone. And you left me completely stranded and alone with everyone staring at me like I was some kind of freak. And what did I do to deserve it?"
"Joey..."
"Nothing. I didn't do anything to deserve it," Joey continued.
She'd been half practising what she'd say to Charlie on the way home.
"Joey, I'm..."
"I have done nothing but support you through all of this," Joey said firmly. "I have listened, I've advised, I've stood up for you, I've held you, I've loved you. Through all of this, I've loved you. And all you've done is push me away. You communicate with bloody Angelo more than you do with me and he betrayed you!"
"I didn't mean..."
"You really hurt me tonight, Charlie. And quite frankly, I deserve better."
With that, she stormed into their room. Charlie turned back to face forward and buried her head in her hands again, sighing heavily.
***
Angelo's shift finished but he stayed on duty. He had nothing to go home for and he'd long since decided that the best thing he could do for anyone, including himself, was finish his mission and get out of town, ready to start afresh elsewhere. May had left him when she'd found out about his deceit concerning Charlie and she'd realised that he was in love with his ex-girlfriend. So now, he was alone and lonely. The only good thing was that Charlie had somewhat reluctantly forgiven him and their colleagues were following suit by at least giving him the time of day again.
***
Joey jumped into the shower, still feeling very low. Her every movement was heavy as she worried that she had been too hard on Charlie. Then she remembered exactly what had happened and the way people had looked at her and judged her and she felt justified. Exiting the shower cubicle, Joey wrapped herself in a big, fluffy towel and padded into the bedroom. It was empty. She wondered what Charlie was doing. She was desperate for her to come in and apologise properly so they could just move on. Dressing quietly, she turned when she saw the door open. Charlie stood, almost a silhouette, looking sad and empty. She came to sit on the edge of the bed and gazed at Joey while she fussed about getting changed and drying her hair. When Charlie still hadn't spoken ten minutes later, she sighed.
"I'll sleep on the couch," she told her.
Charlie's eyes widened in surprise and distress.
"You don't have to..."
Joey left the room clutching a spare blanket and her teddy bear. Charlie fell back on the bed and groaned.
***
"I think I'm ready to face Charlie again," Ruby declared.
She was lying on the sofa and Geoff was on the floor of Michelle's living room. Each night that they'd stayed, she'd offered to take the floor but he was determined to be gentlemanly. It was strange really. Of her friends, she had never been that close to Geoff but now she felt like he knew her better than anyone else in the world did. She felt badly about it but she hardly missed Xavier at all and she doubted he would have been the companion she needed through all this, the companion that Geoff was. They could stay up talking all night and his kindly manner always seemed to get through to her even if he was saying something she didn't want to hear.
"That's great, Rubes," he said.
"Are you ready?"
"I am," he said certainly. "I feel like I can go back to the Bay and start my life again."
"We can do it together," Ruby said almost hopefully.
He reached up and briefly held her hand.
"We can," he confirmed.
***
Joey lay on the couch, glad that it was late and Leah and VJ were already in bed. She shifted around unhappily, struggling to get comfortable. She missed Charlie's warmth around her, the way they always slept in each other's arms, as if attempting to protect each other from the world. It had started before they had even got together properly, when Joey was suffering with terrible nightmares after her ordeal with Robbo. She hadn't slept soundly without her since then. On the few moments they had slept apart, she'd struggled and screamed and she was afraid of suffering tonight. And there was so much in her mind that she didn't think she'd even sleep at all, let alone rest enough to have any kind of dream, good or bad. She just wanted the night to be over.
***
Charlie lay on her side of the bed, as if Joey were beside her. With tears in her eyes, she gazed into the dark above her and sighed heavily. She worried about Joey. Would she be okay sleeping out on the sofa all alone? A large part of their getting together had involved them sleeping in each others arms so that Charlie could protect Joey through her dreams. Taking a deep breath, Charlie flung herself out of bed and felt her way to the door. Opening up, she moved into the lounge and watched Joey lying still and quiet on the couch. Charlie moved round to the front of the sofa and crouched by her head.
"Joey?" she whispered.
Joey kept her eyes shut, contemplating pretending she was asleep. Charlie nudged her gently, almost fearfully.
"Joey?" she said again.
Joey slowly opened her brown eyes and gazed into Charlie's blue ones.
"I'm so sorry," she said. "You're absolutely right about everything you said. I've behaved terribly. I did humiliate you tonight and I have been shutting you out. I didn't mean to do any of it and I truly am sorry. I just..."
She sighed and dropped to sit cross-legged on the floor, clutching Joey's hand.
"It's no excuse but I guess I'm just not used to facing something bad with someone by myself. I'm used to being on my own, surviving by myself. Having someone as incredible as you supporting me and loving me through one of the worst times in my life... it's surreal. And I'm so grateful. You've been perfect, Joey and you're right. You do deserve better. Not just now, but in general. You deserve way better than me. You're the most amazing woman on the planet and I'm just a mess. But if you can bear it, I'd really like to make it up to you. I'd really like to make things right and prove how much I love you – how much I need you."
She reached out and stroked Joey's hair, choosing to politely ignore the fact that she knew Joey was crying. She hoped both of them would ignore that she was tearful too.
"I do need you, Joey," she continued. "And I do love you. I'll do anything to fix things. I will. I'll be in the play. I'll eat humble pie with Harboard. I'll make it right. Please forgive me."
Joey reached out and gathered her into her arms. Charlie happily snuggled up against her on the sofa and relished Joey's comforting touch.
"It's okay," the younger girl whispered. "Everything's okay."
"Thank you," Charlie mumbled, nuzzling her tear-stained face into Joey's neck.
"And you don't have to do the play."
"I want to. I will, Joey," Charlie promised.
"It's okay. You only joined the group for me in the first place and you've got far too much on your plate right now. I understand. You don't need to worry about it."
Charlie snuggled in closer.
"I love you," she said.
"I love you too."
"You're my entire world. You know that, right?" Charlie checked.
"I know, sweetheart," Joey said gently, kissing the top of her head. "And you're mine. I feel like you always have been."
***
Ross wandered round town, becoming more lost and more confused. He knew he'd upset someone, although he didn't know how or why or who. The world was becoming a scary place as the night drew on. At home, Morag picked up the phone to call the police, hoping her step-daughter was on duty.
