Play Toonami Beats - Walking Stick- /sSqYP5frAy0
*Instead of the usual stuff found in Jay's workspace, we open up in the middle of deep space as a massive spaceship travels through the interstellar void. A quick pan-out reveals it to be the Absolution, from the TOM 3.0 Era of Toonami, only now it's renamed the Absolute Vindication. Inside the ship, we see RJ "Jay" Writing Ink walking through the corridors onto the bridge, dressed in his old hoodie and wearing a Toonami Tshirt underneath. As he walks onto the bridge, revealing a holographic version on one of the monitors, Jay smiles as he gets into the captain's chair.*
Jay: What up, Toonami faithful? Yesterday was an important day for anime lovers in the West, with Toonami, Cartoon Network and Adult Swim's highly influential animation block celebrating its 25th birthday. And all of that on St. Patrick's, no less.
Janna: The importance of Toonami cannot be overstated, Jay. Without Toonami, anime might be as mainstream as it is now and think of how many shows we would've missed out on.
Jay: And all the shows influenced by anime, like Star vs. The Forces of Evil. Toonami helped anime achieve mainstream popularity in the West, and while I came to it later than some, I still remember staying up past my bedtime to watch shows like Naruto. So-
*Jay then punches some buttons on his chair, making two more screens reveal countdowns to the premieres for the second halves of the current seasons of Amphibia and The Owl House*
Jay:-I thought this would be appropriate. But enough about that. This week's chapter will see us travel down to the land of fire and brimstone and the start of a relationship that I got big plans for. Get ready for the first part of "Jonah's Inferno."
Janna: Sweet title.
Jay: I know. I thought it sounded cool. Enjoy the drama and teenage hormones, people.
End Music
It was a beautiful night in the dimension known throughout the Universe known as Mewni. Without the excessive artificial lights found on Earth, the stars and moons in the Mewnian sky were free to light up the night sky for all that dwelled below. All, that is, save for one place. Deep below the ground lay the land known throughout Mewni as the Underworld. The Underworld was a harsh place, a series of interconnecting caverns and levels so vast that they rivaled the surface in land size. The Stalagmites were so massive that they grew to the size of actual mountains, creating mountain ranges intermixed with numerous volcanoes. Add in the fact that rivers and lakes of lava flowed in place of water, and the Underworld looked outright inhospitable. Yet, as a certain film character once said, "life finds a way." In this case, the Underworld was home to the people known as the Demons.
No one was sure when the Demons first emerged, not even the Demons themselves. They came directly from the fire and lava that spewed forth from the Earth itself, according to legend. Yet the world they found was dark, without the glory of the sun, moon, or stars like that above, save for a single place where they could get light from the world above. Such a harsh land naturally bred hard people, with the earliest Demons using what scant few resources they found to survive...and kill. They started to fight amongst themselves using great weapons and eldritch powers that would later be recognized as a form of magic. These "Demon Wars" would last for untold centuries until, at last, the Underworld was united by a single leader, House Lucitor. And one of the first things the first Lucitor King did was light up his subject's world.
According to legend, the first King of the Underworld decreed his people would not be denied the glow of the sun and skies above. So, he decided to bring the stars to the Underworld. Using the finest jewels mined from the rock and cut by his finest craftsman, the King then placed the gleaming gems into the roof of the caverns to match the constellations of the Mewnian night sky. The largest jewel, one said to be as big as a castle, he kept hanging in the air above, though, away from its sister gems. Then, using demonic magic known only to his family, the King enchanted the gemstones to light up like the sun and stars in the sky, with the great stone becoming the heart of a ball of fire that resembled the sun itself. Using their magic, the demons were able to make the gemstones mimic the paths of the heavenly bodies of the surface. The great stone, named 'Belial' in honor of the first King, would light up the Underworld by day, while the gemstones would become the stars that the Demons would watch at night, their locations changing with the passing seasons as they did above. However, the moon would remain untouched and provided by the hole to the world above.
It was underneath this false night sky that Tamara 'Tammy' Lucitor found herself under as she sat on the balcony to her room in her family's Castle, Helvete. To be more precise, she wasn't sitting. She was sitting on the ground in some spare clothes she had, a blanket wrapped around her while her pet bunny, Panne, sat in a playpen as Tammy kept petting her. Yet not even the fluffy bunny was enough to cheer Tammy up, nor did the quart of ice cream she was eating from do any good. She just sat there, tears running down her eyes, listening to depressing music and eating spoonfuls of ice cream as she stared at a little shrine she had made of pictures with her and her love, Comet Dragonfly. There were many photos of the two of them over the years, but the main one she was focusing on was their first kiss, the great sunstone Belial setting behind them as they did so.
"Comet..." Tammy sobbed as she took another spoonful of ice cream and shoved it into her mouth. This was her life now, destined to watch as the man she loved was out of reach.
Ever since the incident with the human girl (Marcia, she reminded herself) a few weeks ago, Tammy had had to come to terms with the fact that Comet Dragonfly may never want to date her again. She handled that well enough for the first few days, doing her best not to think about it that much. Eventually, though, the realization began to sink in, and once that happened, she could feel her heart beginning to break.
About a week after she gave up on her 'Ms. Candle' scheme, Tammy had gotten so sad about losing Comet that she didn't want to leave her room. Much to her family's concern, she sat cooped up in there, wallowing in her misery. At first, they left her alone, hoping that she would snap out of it independently. But now, things had gotten to the point where they couldn't let it go on any longer. Hence, Tammy found her misery time interrupted by a knock on the door.
With a noise that sounded somewhere between a sigh and a sob, Tammy reluctantly got up off the ground, making sure to keep her blanket wrapped around her as she made her way to the door.
Whoever it is, I don't want to talk to them, Tammy thought before briefly considering simply ignoring whoever was at the door. Given how it was likely another one of the many servants employed by her family, though, meant that such a gesture would be futile. Glumly, she opened the door where, rather than a mere servant, stood her life coach, Meg.
"Oh," Tammy spoke up, a hint of surprise finding its way into her voice as she did so. "Did you need something?"
Meg looked at the disheveled state that her charge was in before offering her a sympathetic smile. "Hey there, Tammy. How are you doing? Feeling better yet?" Meg asked the Princess in a tone that sounded more sweet than sympathetic to Tammy's ears.
"Nooo..." Tammy sniffled as she felt another wave of sadness come on. "And I don't know how to feel better, Meg."
"Yeah, I know that you're still feeling bad about...him," Meg consoled her, being very careful not to bring up Comet's name. "Well, listen," Meg continued as she put a sympathetic hand on Tammy's shoulder. "I just want you to know how proud I am of you for not going through what you wanted to do to that girl. Not many people can have the level of restraint that you showed that night, especially given how..." Meg hesitated, not knowing how to best word what she wanted to say without offending Tammy.
"How we have millions of angry little demons inside of us ready to explode when something sets us off?" Tammy bluntly finished, having guessed what Meg was thinking from the look on her coach's face.
"Well, yeah," Meg sheepishly admitted. "And your parents are just as proud of you as I am, Tammy," Meg continued. "They may not have been happy to hear how you threatened to eviscerate that human girl."
Tammy's three eyes just narrowed into a glare at Meg, her sadness already beginning to be replaced by anger. "Look, if that's all you wanted to say to me, then please leave me alone," Tammy irritatedly told her life coach before moving to close the door.
"Actually, that's not everything." Meg placed her foot in between the doors, keeping them from closing shut on her. "I also wanted to tell you that your parents would like to speak to you right now."
"No," Tammy simply said as she walked back to the balcony.
"Tammy-"
"Not. Now." Tammy said once more, this time with more frustration in her voice.
"Look, Tammy. Your parents are ordering you to come to speak with them in their room, and they could either send me to ask you or send a bunch of servants to bring you there, whether you wanted to or not," Meg said as she stepped inside Tammy's bedroom (which, she now realized, hadn't been organized for quite some time.) "So, what's it going to be?"
Tammy groaned, but nonetheless, she ultimately complied. "Fine. But I'm coming right back here once I'm done," she said as she marched her way out of her bedroom to her parent's bedroom.
As soon as Tammy had left the room, Meg pulled out a walkie-talkie. "All right, guys, she's gone. The cleaning team can move in."
As Tammy glumly trudged through the halls of her family's opulent Castle, past the dark granite columns, torch-lit hallway, and crimson-tinted windows, she wondered what in here's name could her parents possibly want with her.
Who am I kidding? They probably just want to see if I'm doing any better, Tammy mentally growled, her mood now more irritable than it was sad. Not helping things was the fact that the fastest route she could take through the Castle to her parent's bedroom forced her to walk through the Hall of Hellfire, AKA one of several places in Castle Helvete dedicated to the strength and power of the Lucitor bloodline.
Tammy had never been overly fond of going through the Hall and was even less so with the mood she was in. The Hall of Hellfire was a visual record of House Lucitor's history from the ascension of the first King of the Underworld to the present day. Every wall had the images of the past Kings, their consorts, and other prominent members of the family carved into them, and underneath each picture was a torch of magically conjured Hellfire, said to burn for all eternity. It was the family's way of letting people know that even one of their members might be gone, their will would continue to live on so long as House Lucitor lived. Having ruled for more than five thousand years, longer than any other royal house in Mewni, there were a lot of images and carvings to walk past. And at that moment, Tammy couldn't help but feel inferior to all of them.
Of all the Lucitors, I feel like I might be the only one who's had no luck when it comes to love, Tammy thought as she tried to avoid looking at the faces of each of her ancestors and relatives. She felt that if they could talk, they'd express nothing but disappointment in her for failing to take what should've been hers. Lucitors were supposed to be fearless, willful, and would stop at nothing to get what their hearts desired, yet all Tammy had done was be the exact opposite. And she didn't know if that felt worse than the prospect of losing Comet forever.
After what seemed like an eternity, Tammy finally reached the end of the Hall and the eyes of her ancestors, after which it was only a short walk to her parent's bedroom. The one good thing about having to speak with her Mom and Dad in their room rather than the throne room was that she didn't have to care about the fact that she looked absolutely horrible. With her long, salmon-colored hair sticking up from bedhead, the bags under her three eyes, and mascara running down her face from all the tears, she did not look like a Princess who had to appear before the Obsidian Throne. Thankfully, she didn't seem to run into any servants, relatives, or nobles before reaching the massive doors to her parent's bedroom and giving an unenthusiastic knock on the door.
"Mom? Dad? I'm here," Tammy said, not bothering to hide the depression in her voice.
"It's open, sweetie. You can come in," a man's voice said on the other side before Tammy pushed the door open and stepped inside her parent's room. Sitting on the end of the bed were Wrathmelior and Dave Lucitor, the Queen and King Consort of the Underworld.
To anyone who had never seen them in person, Tammy's parents would've seemed as different as night and day. Her Mother, Queen Wrathmelior, was an absolutely giant Demon that stood four times the height of her husband. With deep, crimson skin, cloven-hoofed legs, muscular arms, large dark-grey horns with reddish-gray tips, wings, three thin eyes, and pointed ears, teeth, and tail, she looked much like the archetypical Demon found in human myths and legends. Were it not for the fact that they both had three eyes and salmon-colored hair (which her Mom preferred to keep short instead of long), one might not think that Wrathmelior was Tammy's Mother.
Then there was Tammy's father, Dave Lucitor. Whereas his Wife was massive, he was a normal height, albeit he had the thin ripples of muscles beneath the red, semi-formal dress shirt he was currently wearing. With his cream-colored skin, short and tidy brown hair, and teal green eyes, Dave Lucitor was considered by many to be a very handsome man and one that hardly looked like a Demon when compared to his Wife and child. That was because Dave wasn't a Demon at all but a Mewman.
Like Comet's parents, Dave and Wrathmelior could be considered an odd pairing in the royal community of Mewni. To begin with, Wrathmelior was the one who was actually royalty, having born the second daughter of the previous King. As for Dave, he was a normal Mewman who got a job as a barista at Wrathmelior's favorite coffee shop, and she happened to tip well. The two ended up going on a few dates, hit it off, and the next thing they knew, they were tying the knot. This led to more than a few members of the family grumbling about letting a Mewman into the family, but things didn't become a problem until Wrathmelior's older sister, Exasperella, announced that she was going to pass on her claim to the throne so she could travel the Universe. With no male heirs, that made Wrathmelior the next ruler by default, and the fact that she married a Mewman Commoner left some Demons uneasy. However, those fears were quickly squashed when Dave proved to everyone that he had a temper to match that of any Demon and had mastered Demonic Arts to the point that even Wrathmelior's Dad was impressed. So just like that, they became Queen and King Consort of the Underworld, with Dave helping to run the day-to-day affairs while his Wife focused on the bigger picture.
"Hello Mother, Father," Tammy said in a tone that sounded more irritated than she had meant. Whether her parents did not notice this or simply chose to ignore it was up for debate, but they did not seem to bring the matter up as her Dad gave his daughter a warm smile.
"Hello, sweetie," Dave said in as warm and welcoming a voice as Mewmanly possible. If he was trying to cheer his daughter up, though, then he would have to do better than that.
"So, did you both need me for something, or can I please go back to my room," Tammy bluntly told her parents, not in the mood to talk to them.
"Yes," was all Dave said. "Your Mother and I just wanted to know how you were doing. Are you feeling any better, sweetie?"
Tammy did her best to repress a sob as she tried to maintain her composure. "Nooo..." she admitted. "I'm still miserable, Dad. I know that I may never get a chance to win back my darling Comet and that I should try to move on from him...but I just can't!" It was then that Tammy felt the dam burst inside her heart as fresh tears began to fall down her face. "I just can't stop thinking about his handsome face or adorable smile or how his eyes shine brighter than any of the fake stars in our fake sky, and it feels like my heart's breaking in two all over again!" Tammy sobbed while her parents looked on in concern.
Not wanting to see their daughter so miserable, Wrathmelior reached over and picked up Tammy in one of her massive hands as she brought her close to her head. Before Tammy could protest, she used a single finger to gently pat her face, all the while trilling and crooning something in old Demonic, a language that few outside the Demons could understand.
"*There, there, sweetie*," Wrathmelior told her daughter. "*I know that it hurts, but dwelling on the past won't help you feel better.*"
"B-but I don't know what else to do, Mom. I just-I can't stop thinking about Comet. And the more I think about him, the more I think about how I screwed up!" Tammy cried as her Mother kept stroking her face.
"Tammy," Dave called up to her daughter from where he sat on the bed. "I don't know what will make the pain you're feeling in your heart go away," he admitted sympathetically. "But what I do know is that you're not going to be able to find the answer by cutting yourself off from everyone you know like you have been. The best way to feel better is for you to get out there and find something meaningful you can do," Dave said as Wrathmelior let Tammy back down.
"But what am I supposed to do, Dad?" Tammy said, genuinely unsure about what she could do to help her move on. "It's not like I have any friends," Tammy shamefully admitted. Thanks to her temper, very few people wanted to genuinely be her friend growing up. Yes, she had hung out with Comet's other friends, like MC, but they were more like mutual acquaintances rather than actual friends.
Well, I did get along fine with Aqua, but I just can't see her right now. Having learned from Marcia Diaz that the Princess of Oceanus had feelings for Comet, Tammy didn't know how she'd react if she were to see the Mermaid again. Worst case, her jealousy would lead her to do something that she would immediately regret.
"*Well, maybe now might be the best time for you to try and make some new friends, sweetie*," Wrathmelior suggested, which didn't do much to help Tammy.
"Where could I find people who could put up with someone like me, though?" Tammy questioned, to which her parents honestly had no clear answer.
"Well, sweetie, if you don't feel like making new friends right now, then you can always start taking your royal duties more seriously," Dave told her, which only made Tammy grimace. She hated the idea of doing her job as a Princess even more than Comet did, and with how bad her temper could be, her parents realized that it would probably not be a good idea to give her those kinds of obligations.
Somehow, Dave could tell what his daughter was thinking at that moment, and he got a very stern and disapproving look on his face. "Tamara, you know that your Mother and I think that you have been shirking your duties as the next Queen of the Underworld off for far too long now. We've given you a lot of leeway so that you could work with Meg on controlling your anger, but we both think that you need to start pulling your weight around here."
"*Daughter, finding something to direct your energy towards might end up being the best remedy for how miserable you feel right now*," Wrathmelior pointed out. "*Which is why we called you here today, sweetie.*"
"Seriously?" Tammy asked aloud with a disapproving look on her face. "You think the best way to help is to give me work?"
"Well, yes," Dave admitted. "But don't worry. I think that this will be something that will let you vent all of those negative emotions that you're feeling right now," he quickly added on.
Feeling like she had nothing left to lose, Tammy suppressed a sigh in her throat and looked her father in the eye. "What do you want me to do?"
Dave beamed a little when he saw that his daughter was at least open to his suggestion. "Well, Tammy, there's an issue that we're having out near the edge of the Prickly Plains. Reports are coming in about a very aggressive Hydra attacking the nearby villages. And there are rumors about a group of Cenobites that are starting to make trouble in the same area."
Tammy cringed at the mention of the Cenobites. She didn't know much about them beyond the fact that they were constantly seeking forms of gratification to the point that they couldn't tell the difference between pain and pleasure. As far as she and many others were concerned, they were a bunch of perverted Demons.
"*We were going to send our soldiers to take care of both issues, but then your Father and I thought that this might be the perfect way for you to let off steam-*."
"-and teach you about the art of diplomacy and restraint," Dave added. Tammy was...less than convinced about everything.
"And if I refuse, can I go back to my room?" Tammy said, any notion of being polite to her parents now gone.
"I'm sorry, Tammy, but that's not an option," Dave said, crossing his arms in the universal gesture of showing people you're pissed off. "You can either do that, go through the paperwork we have to do...or investigate another rumor going around."
"Besides what's happening with the Hydra and the perverts?" Tammy snarked, earning herself another disapproving look from her parents.
"This is serious, Tammy. Rumors are going around of a particularly powerful Demon being summoned. Something like this hasn't been done in centuries," Dave told his daughter.
"How is that our problem? Last time I checked, we were the ones who signed off on this Demon Summoning Program," Tammy pointed out, which only served to irritate her father. Fortunately, Wrathmelior stepped in before things could get worse.
"*Tammy, the reason why this is so concerning to us isn't the fact that the Demon in question is incredibly powerful. If the rumors are to be believed, it was done by...a Human*."
Tammy could barely hold back the disgust on her face as soon as she heard that. "Please tell me you're joking, Mom," she asked, the annoyance seeping into her voice at the mention of the word "Human."
"I wish your Mother was, Tamara, but I'm afraid she's telling the truth," Dave affirmed solemnly on his face.
The relationship between Humans and Demons was an oddity in the Universe. Almost everyone in the Universe looked down on Humans as part of a backward, magicless world that lacked interdimensional travel, with Demons counting among their numbers. Nonetheless, the Demons had also discovered that the superstitious people of Earth were easy to manipulate and thus made for a good source of amusement/test subjects for curses and demonic arts. Even members of House Lucitor had been known to visit Earth over the centuries just so they could mess with the gullible people. However, that pastime had somewhat waned in popularity in recent decades as they became less gullible.
Not helping things for Tammy was the fact that Earth now served as residence to her beloved Comet Dragonfly and the likes of Marcia Diaz. Should the Lucitor Princess choose to follow up on these leads on Earth, she will almost certainly run into either of them. Given how she was still in a precarious mental state, that would not end well for anyone.
"Now, you can either deal with the Hydra and unruly Cenobites, get to work on the documents, or investigate Earth," Dave reminded his daughter. "The choice is yours, but I am not going to let you just go back to your room and feel sorry for yourself. You're still a Lucitor, and if there's one thing our family is known for, it's never letting our past decisions weigh us down."
Grimacing as she suppressed the urge to sigh, Tammy finally spoke up. "When do you want me to go deal with the Hydra and the perverts?"
Dave's lights lit up a little when he heard his daughter's decision, even if he did wince when Tammy called the Cenobites perverts (even if it were true.) "Splendid. I knew I could count on you, sweetie!" he said as he clasped his hands. "You'll leave first thing in the morning, and don't worry, Tammy. This will help you out more than you realize!"
"Oh, yay," Tammy said sardonically, doing her best not to glower at her Dad as she did so.
I am not looking forward to tomorrow, was all that went through Tammy's head as she made the walk back across the Castle to the privacy of her bedroom. That thought in and of itself was no longer a rarity to the likes of Tammy, given how utterly depressed she was. But still, she really didn't want to have to do what her parents had asked of her, and she failed to see why they thought it might be a good thing. She couldn't even understand why they wanted her to do it when they had perfectly good retainers and mercenaries-for-hire that could do it for her!
All I want is to sit in my room for the rest of my life! Is that too much to ask? Tammy wondered as she finally made it back to her bedroom, which, to her surprise, was now in a very pristine condition compared to when she left. She found a note from Meg lying on her bed that explained that she had the staff straighten everything up while she was gone. Apparently, none of the people working in the Castle was willing to set foot in Tammy's bedroom during her seclusion, afraid of awakening her ire. The unintentional reminder of how everyone besides her parents was fearful of her temper did little to improve Tammy's mood.
For a moment, Tammy thought about simply plopping on top of her bed and going directly to sleep, but a sudden thought ran through her head that made her reconsider:
"When was the last time I had a shower?"
The realization that she had been neglecting her personal hygiene over the past few weeks made Tammy feel grateful that no one (besides Panne, who was sleeping in her crate) was present in her room. Otherwise, she would've died from sheer embarrassment. Hastily, she briskly strode to the private bathroom connected to her bedroom, shut the door behind her, not wanting anyone to disturb her, and then undressed. Knowing that she could simply call someone to collect her clothes (which, she had to admit, would need a deep cleaning in the wash), Tammy simply tore what she was wearing off of her body before casually throwing them into a loose pile off to the side. Given how she liked to wear undergarments on the...provocative side, it took a little longer than she would've liked. Not helping the fact was that she had to be cautious around her lower back, as she had something there that she normally didn't want people to see.
Carefully, Tammy moved her hands to the base of her hips and tugged at the protrusion coming from it, moving it from the custom-tailored hole in her panties that she used to keep it wrapped up and hidden. After a moment or two of effort, she finally got the object free, revealing it to be a long, jet-black tail, similar to the one that her Mother had. Unlike Wrathmelior's tail, which was more spearlike, hers ended in a spade that looked an awful lot like that of a heart at the end. She did not like to show out in public, so she would normally keep it hidden underneath her clothes, only taking it out when she was alone...or with someone she trusted.
Someone like Comet...
Fighting off another wave of sadness, Tammy stepped inside the shower, turned it up as high as it could go, and let the water soak her body before reaching for her soap and shampoo and rubbing it down through her long, salmon-colored hair and her curvaceous figure.
Tammy was well aware of how physically attractive she was; at the age of fourteen, she was already developing a body that would be the envy of many women in their late teens and early twenties. She had very little in the way of excess fat, her skin didn't have a blemish on her, and her boobs were perfectly balanced with the rest of her. Most guys that she met would drool over her!
"UGGHH, SO WHY CAN'T I WIN COMET OVER WITH MY KILLER BODY!?" Tammy cried aloud in frustration, and she really had no clue why. According to her Mom, she was so physically attractive due to having Succubus blood in her veins. Succubi were supposed to charm anyone into going gaga over him, but for whatever reason, Comet was immune. The irony alone was enough to make Tammy want to bang her head on the nearest wall until she passed out, but she chose to refrain from doing so. The last thing she needed was for her parents to lecture her on causing unnecessary damage to her room.
After standing in the middle of the shower long after she'd finished cleaning herself off, something inside of Tammy's emotionally-addled brain reminded her that she should get out before her skin got pruney. With a heavy sigh, she shut off the water and opened the door to her shower, just enough for her to reach out and grab a nearby bath towel.
That's when it happened. Just as Tammy finished wrapping the towel around her figure to cover herself, her body was enveloped by a strange, ethereal glow. At first, Tammy didn't notice it or thought it was some trick from the steam. It wasn't until the light began to grow in intensity that she finally realized something was happening.
"What in the-" was all that Tammy could get out before she heard a loud, unmewni sound and felt her vision go completely white.
Tammy knew that she was landing flat on her ass and feeling like someone had split her head open with a hammer and chisel. It took her a moment for her vision to return, and the bright light had managed to blind her pretty badly, much to her annoyance.
"Okay, what was that?" Tammy growled as she felt her eyesight slowly begin to return to normal, though not fast enough for the irritable teenager. "Is this supposed to be someone's idea of a prank? Because this is not very-"
Tammy froze mid-sentence as her vision finally returned enough for her to see...that she was no longer in her shower. Or her family's Castle, for that matter. Instead, much to her concern, she found herself sitting in the middle of something that she did not recognize. It was a room painted in very dark, olive-green colored walls; that is, the places that weren't covered in posters and artwork of creatures that Tammy had never seen before but felt like they gave off a demonic nature. The rest of the room's furniture proved to be equally bizarre, featuring everything from books to skulls to a container with what looked like a multi-legged insect that she could not recognize. It was by far one of the weirdest rooms that she had ever seen, but also one of the creepiest, which, to Demons, was considered cool.
None of these observations helped with her immediate question: "What just happened?"
"*Whistle*. Well, I wasn't expecting this to happen."
Tammy froze, not only because of the sudden, unexpected voice that came from behind, but the person it belonged to sounded distinctly male. She reluctantly turned her head around to look behind her and found that her ears weren't messing with her. Sitting on the ground behind her was a boy around her age, wearing a blue coat, a beanie that matched the color of his room, and a half-lidded look smirk on his face that she found incredibly irritating.
"Sup?" was all the boy could get out before he found himself unceremoniously pinned against the back wall by a very, very, very pissed-off Tammy.
"WHO ARE YOU!? HOW DID I GET HERE!? WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH ME?!" Tammy growled in a very deep, demonic voice that would've sent shivers up the spines of almost anyone who heard it. Yet, to her carefully hidden surprise, the boy remained completely impassive, simply looking at her like he wanted to know what she planned to do.
"So, is this what your people consider foreplay, or are you just that angry that I yanked you away from whatever it was you were doing?" the boy responded in a very flippant tone that only served to make Tammy angrier.
"I SAID ANSWER MY QUESTIONS IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE, MORTAL! OR DO YOU TRULY WISH FOR ME TO WIPE YOUR EXISTENCE FROM THE UNIVERSE?"Tammy roared again once more, which only made the boy give a cocky smirk, which only made Tammy even more pissed off. It's like this guy wasn't afraid of her no matter what she did, and she found that irritating beyond reason! What he said next, though, shocked her to her very core:
"Man, you really do have anger issues. No wonder Comet decided to dump your sorry ass."
Hearing the mention of her beloved was enough to get through the fog of anger that was clouding Tammy's judgment. Not by much, but just enough to give her pause.
"How do you know about Comet Dragonfly?" she asked, her tone a curious mix of anger and curiosity that only seemed to make the boy even cockier.
"All right, to answer your questions in no particular order: I'm Jonah Ordonia, aspiring alchemist and future ruler of my own dark dimension. We are currently standing in my room in Echo Creek, California, located on Earth. And I know Comet Dragonfly because we go to school together, and he's a very good friend of mine." Jonah then paused for a moment. "And I know that you're Tammy Lucitor, AKA Princess of the Underworld, AKA Comet's smoking hot ex with anger issues. As for why you're here, I summoned you without even intending to do so. And I seem to have caught you as you were in the middle of showering...or, you know, trying to get over your loneliness. I won't judge." Once again, Jonah put on that same, half-lidded smirk as he looked at Tammy, who suddenly became aware that she was dressed in nothing but a bath towel and began to turn as red as a tomato.
Tammy screamed in embarrassment as she fell back onto the floor and began to crawl as far away from Jonah as possible. "You pervert! I demand that you send me back to my home right now!" As soon as those words came out of the girl's mouth, though, something in her mind clicked. Something that her parents had said to her earlier that night was very important.
Oh no, Tammy thought as she began to put the pieces together inside her mind. "How...did you bring me here?"
"With this." Jonah then pulled something out of his pocket that Tammy figured was what passed for a communication device on Earth and brought up a program that Tammy was quick to recognize, even if she had no such desire to do so: it was the Demon Summoning Program
"Oh no..."
A few minutes later, Tammy was pacing back and forth in front of Jonah's bed, clad in a spare shirt and shorts that had been graciously given to her by the human boy. Much to her dismay, though, they still managed to hug her body a lot more than she would like. Normally, she didn't mind that, but the fact that the Human seemed to enjoy getting a rise out of her made her even more frustrated.
"So, let me get this straight," she said as she spoke to Jonah, lying on his bed and watching her. "You, a normal human being, not only managed to become proficient in alchemy, but you also managed to summon an incredibly powerful Demon, something that you shouldn't have been able to do in the first place-"
"Yet I did," Jonah smugly boasted, much to Tammy's annoyance.
"-and now, to top it off, you were somehow able to randomly summon me using that stupid program that you have on that thing you call a phone."
"That about sums it up, yeah."
Tammy groaned as she felt her frustration begin to mount. When her family had agreed to create the whole Demon Summoning thing, they had put themselves into the program as a gesture of fairness. Theoretically, someone could've been able to bring them forth and form a contract with them. Being the rulers of the Underworld, though, it was believed that only someone even stronger than they were would be able to pull that off. Save for the Dragonflies, there were very few who could claim that.
And now, this weirdo who says he's friends with my beloved Comet managed to do the impossible! Fucking beautiful!
"Leave to one of my love's friends to be able to pull this off," Tammy mumbled under her breath before turning to look at Jonah. "All right, look. Can you just send me back home, and we both agree to never talk about this again?"
Jonah tapped his finger on his chin for a moment, pretending to be considering her request...only to respond with a cheeky "Nope."
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO!?" Tammy yelled as she started to get mad again. This Human was pushing her patience to new levels!
"I mean no," Jonah said, acting like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "You think I will pass up a chance to form a contract with the Princess of the Underworld? No way! With you as my servant, I'll be unstoppable!"
In his mind's eye, Jonah was already picturing the possibilities. If he had the Princess of the Underworld working for him, nothing would be beyond his reach! He could conquer his own dimension and rule as its great and powerful Dark Lord for as long as he would live. Maybe even longer if he could find a way to come back as a ghost or zombie. Just thinking of how people would speak of him in hushed whispers with equal parts awe and fear was enough to make him giddy with excitement, though, on the outside, he remained as aloof and impassive as ever.
"Well, it's not happening, human!" Tammy said with barely concealed contempt in her voice. "There's no way I'll make some sort of contract with someone as vulgar and as crass as you! I don't even know why my sweet, loving Comet would ever want to be friends with you!"
"Is that supposed to be an insult? Because I consider everything you just said as a compliment." Jonah taunted the girl, only making her even angrier. If it weren't for the anger management classes she'd taken with Meg, she would've incinerated this insolent boy long ago and returned to her bedroom.
"Send. Me. Home." Tammy said darkly, her hands crackling with demonic Hellfire to emphasize that this was not a request but a command. Yet Jonah remained unfazed.
"No," Jonah said, his voice filled with an unshaken will. "I know what you did to my friends, Princess. You tried to manipulate Comet into taking you back, causing him a great deal of emotional turmoil. And to top it off, you kidnapped Marcia and wanted to kill her when she threatened to out you for it." Jonah then leaned closer to Tammy. "Now, I consider messing with Marcia my job and mine alone, and I don't appreciate people stepping into my turf, especially an insecure Demon who can't take rejection well," Jonah stated. He then proceeded to pull out several slips of paper from his jacket and made sure to display them in front of Tammy, revealing them to contain small transmutation circles on them. "Now, you're not leaving here until we make that contract, even if I have to force you to your knees."
Tammy was momentarily taken aback by Jonah's steely resolve. The only one besides her parents who showed no fear towards her had been Comet Dragonfly. Yet here sat an ordinary Human, with no magical powers at his disposal, completely and utterly unafraid of her. Her surprise only lasted for a moment, though, and her fiery will soon flared up to match this boy's insolence.
"I'm not making any contract with you, human, and nothing you can do will make me change my otherwise," Tammy proclaimed. "Now, I command you to send me back to the Underworld. My parents are expecting me to go out and deal with some...problems threatening our subject, and I do not wish to disappoint them."
Jonah cocked an inquisitive eyebrow. "Problems?"
"Nothing that concerns you, Human," Tammy said as she turned her back on Jonah. "I doubt that you would know anything about the likes of a Hydra, or dealing with a cult of Demons dedicated to the carnal arts of pain," she said in a rather haughty tone, trying to flaunt just how far above Jonah she was in the Universe.
"A Hydra, huh?" Jonah repeated as he leaned back against the wall. "The infamous great serpent whose very breath is poisonous enough to kill anyone who breathes it in. It's said that if you cut off one's head, it'll grow two more in its place? So how do you plan on dealing with it? You could cauterize the stumps, but I think that whole process takes too long for my taste," Jonah mused. "And I'm guessing that the other problem is a group of Cenobites, huh? You could make them stop bugging people using force, but knowing how much they're into pain, they might like that. So were you planning on making a deal with them or just playing it by ear?"
Tammy couldn't help but let the shock be apparent on her face. How could a Human know so much about the Underworld without ever setting foot in it? Jonah just smirked at her once again, having guessed what she was thinking.
"Wow, don't tell me that a mere Human managed to blow the mind of the Princess of the Underworld? That's probably the highest honor you could ever give me," he teased, annoying Tammy for the umpteenth time in the last ten minutes or so.
"I don't know how you came about that knowledge, Human, " Tammy hastily said, "but if you think that's going to impress me, then it's not. And I don't need to tell you how I plan on dealing with them! My plans are my own, and you have no right to judge them."
"I see. So you don't know what you're doing, do you?" Even though he had said it like a question, Jonah was actually making a statement. He knew that Tammy had no clue how she would deal with these tasks and that he derived great pleasure from that knowledge.
"All right then, I think that we can make this work."
"Make what work?" Tammy asked, not understanding what the Human was referring to.
"It's simple, really," Jonah said as he got up off the bed and looked at Tammy. "Instead of forcing you into a contract, I'll help you take care of both of your problems. But I'm going to want something else in return."
"Like what?" Tammy narrowed her eyes in response as her mind began to think of what this vulgar boy could possibly want besides making the Princess of the Underworld his servant.
Don't tell me that he's going to ask to have his way with me?! To have this, this...maggot running his hands all over my perfect body and using me to fulfill his carnal desires is just...I can't even think about that! The thought of anyone besides Comet doing those things to her was enough to make her want to vomit.
Tammy's thoughts must have leaked out of her head and onto her voice as Jonah got this wicked look on his face. "I'm sorry, but didn't you call me a pervert not a short while ago? Hard to give someone that label when your mind is thinking such naughty things?"
"WHY, YOU LITTLE-"
Jonah threw his hands up instead. "Relax, Princess. Despite everyone thinking otherwise, I've got standards," he said to calm her down. "No, what I want is something much more valuable than what you thought." Jonah knew he didn't have to say it like that, but he just liked messing with Tammy like this.
"What is it, then?" Tammy demanded to know, and what Jonah said next was probably the last thing she thought she would hear from him.
"I want full Underworld citizenship," Jonah stated, his tone decidedly serious, "And access to all the knowledge and resources that your Kingdom may have, along with the right to come and go as I see fit."
"Wha-are you serious?" Tammy incredulously asked.
"I am, in fact," Jonah reiterated. "That's what I want in return for helping you deal with your little problems. And, I should note, I won't tell anyone about the fact that I managed to summon the Princess of the Underworld in her bath towel." Tammy couldn't help but blush a little at this. "And, I'll do you one better: I'll tell you the secret to getting Comet to let you back into his life."
Tammy's eyes widened a little at this as thoughts of her dear Prince came to mind. Was this a genuine offer? Did this boy really know how to get Comet to give her another chance, even if it was just as friends? Jonah held out his hand as she thought this out, which Tammy eyed with great apprehension.
"Are you seriously making a deal with a Demon?" Tammy asked, disbelieving that a Human would make such a bargain with one of her kind.
"No," Jonah confidently said. "You're making a deal with me."
In that exact moment, Tammy realized that Jonah was either the most arrogant guy she'd ever met...or the craziest. Seeing as how she got the better part of the deal, she figured that she had nothing to lose. Tammy shook Jonah's hand.
"Deal," Tammy simply said.
"Excellent," Jonah said with a half-lidded smirk that Tammy quickly realized was probably his default expression. "Come back tomorrow to get me, then."
"Very well, Human. I will return to you first thing tomorrow. But you should know that I will not be held responsible." Tammy informed him, which did little to dissuade him.
Realizing that there was nothing else keeping her here, Tammy finally attempted to open a portal. Whereas most beings would have to rely on dimensional scissors to travel between places, Demons had the natural ability to do so. Summoning forth a small pillar of flame to shroud her body, Tammy then began the descent back into the Underworld and back to her room, where she planned on burning the clothes the Human gave her.
Now left alone, Jonah looked at the scorch marks left behind with a smirk on his face.
"Looks like tomorrow's going to be fun."
*Back on the Absolute Vindication, Janna's laughing her butt off!*
Janna: HAHAHA HAHAHA! So, my counterpart managed to somehow summon the Princess of all Demons from her bathroom while she was wearing nothing but a towel. That is some straight-up harem anime shit you got going on, Jay.
Jay: I cannot lie about this. I was influenced by anime in this scenario. You'd be surprised how often an anime hero has gotten caught up in something like what Jonah just went through.
Janna: Still, I thought it was awesome how he handled all of that without breaking a sweat. My alternate twin's got guts, I'll give him that. So, I take it that we just saw the beginnings of JanTom...or whatever you're calling the ship in this story.
Jay: Guilty as charged. I think JanTom was such a huge missed opportunity, and I like fanfictions that explore that idea. I mean, come on, Janna. You're more of a Demon than most Demons found in the show.
Janna: I will not dispute that. And I do think that ruling my own kingdom of hellfire suits me.
Jay: Right? So, I had to do it! That's why I invited you and you alone to the watch party.
Janna: Speaking of which, where's everyone else? I recall you promising them a pizza party last week.
Jay: Well, see, Dana Terrace had this charity live stream last Sunday, and she drew Hooty as this Biblically accurate angel, and Hooty saw the artwork, and *shudders*...look, it doesn't matter. The others went to help Hooty out, and they're going to watch it from where they're staying afterward. They'll be back on board next week for the second half of this arc.
Janna: Will this ship still be here?
Jay: Probably. And I wish we could have more time to talk about my Underworld world-building, but we're gonna have to wait until next week. Now, then, let's move on to
READER'S REVIEWS
NightAroma-My friend, I have this whole arc where Marcia visits Woolandia and she gets them all hooked on Earth martial arts and Shonen anime floating around in my head. It's going to be epic. And yeah, the lingering trauma of Toffee will be a recurring thing in this book for Comet and Marcia. And yes, Rastkora's cybernetics are enhancements; she could grow back her real arm and eye.
Oh, and for Comet's new attack, right anime, wrong attack. It's based on Goku's Dragon Fist, and the charging is based on the Special Beam Cannon, though.
Guest-I forgot. Tina's voice by Tara Strong. Look her up and you'll see why.
LockAndKey989-Two things: one, no Quest Buy Card. Or at least not like in the show, because I thought that was dumb. And two, if Abhorrent meets Marcia's parents, I will either deus ex machina that shit out of existence or make Mr. and Mrs. Diaz not be stupid.
Seriously, any sane parent would've realized that Abhorrent was nuts.
Julayla-I'm glad I could put your fears to rest.
The Wandering Hippie-Well, to be honest, had the fight continued, Rastkora would've beaten the shit out of Killian, and it was taking all he had to hold his own. And yeah, I'm trying to make sure Comet doesn't suffer from the Aesop Amnesia Star had in Season Two. Also, "Run for Your Ed" was one of my favorite Ed Edd n Eddy episodes.
You know what to do: fave and follow this story, and follow me on Twitter (JZ-Gaming), Insta (RJ Writing Ink), and YouTube (Jungoguy)
If you guys will excuse me, I've got to go make sure that I get an extra-large pizza to make up for the others not making it to this week's chapter.
