Chapter 7

Tim woke up and sighed a little. It wasn't that he didn't like the idea of taking Salma to school and everything. It was just that he didn't want all those eyes staring at him. Maybe he was making too much of it. Probably.

He sat up and stretched and then got out of bed and went into the bathroom. To save some time, he'd just jog around the neighborhood instead of heading over to Rock Creek. Then, he could mentally prepare himself for this thing that shouldn't be a big deal but was for some reason.

When he came out of the bathroom, Zahara was awake.

"I'm just going to stay in the neighborhood this morning," he said. "I won't be long."

And he got that sick feeling in his stomach, remembering how casually he had left that morning and how everything in his life had been thrown into turmoil because of it. He took a deep breath and tried to dispel the lead weight.

Zahara got out of bed and stopped him before he left the bedroom.

"Tim, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," Tim said, but he avoided her eyes.

"Tim. Please, tell me."

He mustered up a weak smile. "Just remembering is all. Nothing important."

As she often did, Zahara cupped her hand on his cheek and caressed the scars around his eye. Then, she kissed him gently.

"It is important," she said. "You will still run, even with that fear, and you will show that you are stronger than your fear."

Tim hugged Zahara tightly.

"I don't think I am."

"You are," Zahara said and then pulled back and smiled a little mischievously. "But you may not be stronger than Marra."

Tim laughed a little and hugged her again. Then, he forced himself to leave the bedroom and go down to where Marra was already waiting eagerly with her leash in her mouth. He took a deep breath and walked over to her. He knelt down and clipped on the leash.

"Okay, Marra. Can you help me feel safe today?"

Tim didn't know how much Marra understood, but he had said that to her before and she always seemed to stay closer to him when he did. He stood up and left the house and started his run.

And Marra stayed close to him this time as they ran and Tim felt better about it with his large dog loping easily alongside him. This was when he was glad he had a Doberman, although he didn't want to test Marra's protective instinct when she was such a goofball most of the time. However, just the act of running with his dog and having nothing happen made Tim feel less tense as he returned home.

When he got inside, chaos was reigning. Salma had apparently remembered that Tim was taking her to school and she was excited beyond belief and that meant that she had also awakened her little brother who was riled up with her. Tim made eye contact with Zahara and nodded. He ran up to their bedroom and showered and changed as quickly as possible so that he could come down and help calm things down.

"Okay, okay, Salma," he said. "If I'm coming with you to school today, you need to be a good girl and screaming is not the way to go."

Salma heard him and stopped screaming but she was utterly uncowed as she ran over to hug him.

"Baba, you're coming to school with me!"

"Yes, I know, but you need to get dressed. You can't go to school in your jammies."

Tim shooed Salma off to her room and then snagged Jonathan as he made a run for it and, against his protests, took him up to his room to get him dressed while Zahara made breakfast. By the time Salma had dressed herself three times and Tim had fought with Jonathan about the necessity of putting on pants, breakfast was ready and they were trooping down the stairs to the kitchen. Marra was happily eating already and so she didn't cause any extra disruption as they sat down at the table. Tim said a quick blessing on the meal and then they began to eat. Because he'd made sure to be ready early, there was no rush on breakfast as there sometimes was.

All too soon, though, breakfast was over and it was time to get ready to go to school. Salma excitedly ran to get her backpack while Tim gathered his things more slowly. As he was getting his gun out of the safe, Zahara came up behind him and hugged him.

"It's not a big deal, Tim. You will be fine. They don't have time to stare at you for long."

Tim smiled. "Yeah, until there are twenty little kids asking really awkward questions... surrounded by a whole bunch of dads."

Zahara turned him around and pressed her forehead to his forehead.

"You will be fine. If you relax, you might even have fun, and you know that Salma will love that you're there."

"I know."

"Good. Then, take a deep breath and go to school with Salma. I will have a good supper ready for you this evening."

Tim pulled back and smiled. Then, he kissed her on the forehead.

"I have therapy tonight."

"I remember."

"Baba! Time to go!" Salma shouted.

"I go school!" Jonathan said.

Tim smiled at Zahara and then sighed a little. He walked out with everything he needed for work and shook his head.

"No, Jonathan. You're not old enough to go to school yet."

A furrow appeared on Jonathan's forehead. There were gathering storm clouds, and Zahara stepped forward and knelt in front of him.

"Jonathan, remember that you are helping me take Marra to her training today? I need you to help me hold her leash," she said.

"I don't know if your mom can do it by herself," Tim said. "She needs you to be strong. Can you?"

Jonathan thought about it for a few seconds. Then, he flexed his arms.

"I strong!"

"Good. I'll see you tonight," Tim said. "I love you, Jonathan."

"Love you, baba!"

Tim hugged him and then held out his hand to Salma.

"All right, Salma. Let's go to school."

"Yea!"

Salma took his hand and skipped beside him out to the car. Tim made sure she was sitting in her booster seat and then he set off with Salma talking excitedly about how much fun it was going to be to have her dad in school with her. Tim was able to smile at Salma's excitement and he did hope that he didn't ruin anything for her. She still clung to him at times. When she had nightmares, she only wanted her baba. She needed to know he was there.

However, at this moment, it was all about the joy of taking daddy to school.

When they got there, Tim let Salma take his hand again and she skipped beside him into the office where he checked in and then back to the classroom which was already filling up with other awkward dads. Ms. Judy, Salma's teacher, had obviously rearranged the classroom so that the dads could sit beside their children. There were a couple of men who looked to be grandpas and some very young men who were probably only barely out of college. Tim looked at one of the classroom aides for a moment. She smiled a little. She was a CIA agent who had been tasked with watching over Salma at school. What better way to be subtle about it than to have a classroom aide? Salma didn't know it, and Tim didn't know if Ms. Judy knew or not. Regardless, he was glad to have that reassurance.

Finally, it was time to start. Ms. Judy came up to the front of the room and smiled.

"We'd like to welcome all our dads, grandpas, uncles, stepdads, and are so happy to see you all here today. Now, you are all welcome to stay the entire day but I know that many of you will have to go to work. We will start with the introductions by your children and then we'll have some treats and while we eat the treats, each of you will have the chance to talk a little bit about yourself. Then, we'll have a special presentation by your children and if you have to leave after that, we understand. If you can stay, you're welcome to learn along with your children today. Any questions?"

Awkward silence, punctuated by giggles.

"All right. We're going to go in alphabetical order and your children are going to read something that they wrote just for today."

Tim was surprised. He hadn't realized that there would be something specific beyond just Salma saying his name. He had thought it was just going to be him awkwardly trying to talk about himself without really talking about himself. He looked at Salma.

"What did you write?" he whispered to her.

She grinned. "It's a surprise!"

Tim chuckled and then paid attention as the first child, a little boy with large freckles and spiky red hair, named Jimmy Anderson got up.

"My daddy is a... sells homes to people. He picked out our house after Mommy left and he keeps it very clean. Daddy said that we will get a puppy when I can show that I will take care of it. Right now, we have a goldfish named Swimmy. Swimmy is our third goldfish. Daddy says that goldfish die easier than puppies."

Tim laughed with everyone else and Jimmy's dad was blushing a little bit.

"I love my daddy even when he messed up the laundry. It doesn't matter because he's my dad."

There was applause as Jimmy ran over to his dad and gave him a big hug.

The presentations were pretty quick. Some were a little longer, some were shorter. All were embarrassing to varying degrees but they were all heartfelt. Then, it was Salma's turn. She went up to the front of the room.

"My baba is an NCIS agent. He works for the Navy and he helps to keep us safe. Baba is the strongest man in the world, Mama says. Even when he cries, he is strong because he loves us and he fights to come home no matter what, even though he gets hurt a lot and he doesn't like going swimming because people can see the scars. Baba met Mama in Morocco and he loves the color blue because there was a lot of blue in Morocco and he likes the place he met Mama."

Tim felt his face redden and he saw the sidelong glances at him.

"I love Baba because he got a house with a sandbox and because he is always Baba."

As everyone applauded, Tim couldn't decide if his desire to burst into flames with embarrassment or his melting heart at his daughter's simple words was the stronger feeling. But then, Salma ran over to him and hugged him and kissed him... and he gave into the melting heart. He put his arm around Salma as the presentations went on. Once they were finished, Ms. Judy and her aide passed around some milk and cookies. Then, it was time for each dad to talk about himself. This went pretty quick, too. Thankfully, Ms. Judy didn't let anyone ask questions. Tim was relieved. He knew, with Salma's presentation, that there would be questions. He listened politely to every father and then, unfortunately, it was his turn. He stood up and saw a lot of eyes on him.

"I'm Salma's dad, her baba. Baba is Arabic for father, and Salma speaks Arabic better than I do. Mostly, I can tell her to go to bed."

There was some laughter.

"I work for NCIS. That is Naval Criminal Investigative Service. Mostly, I work with computers. I enjoy reading and I have an old manual typewriter that I write on sometimes, but when I'm working, I mostly do things with coding and security."

"And Baba makes stuff from wood!" Salma piped up as Tim sat down.

There was applause, but there were a lot of glances since Tim had said nothing about getting injured and having scars. He was pretty sure that his description of his job as being mostly about computers seemed incongruous. In fact, he was pretty sure that was the most accurate and yet deceptive description of his work that he'd ever given.

Finally, that was done and all the kids went to the front of the room and stood together. They began to recite a poem all together, but when they had to say what their dad did, it was garbled and completely unintelligible. It didn't matter at all.

"Some dads work in an office,
Some dads drive a bus,
Some dads work at a restaurant,
Making some food for us.

Some dads work at a fire station,
Some dads work at a mall,
MY dad works at a _
I like that most of all.

I love you Daddy, oh yes I do!
I love you Daddy, and all you do.
When you're not home with me, I'm blue,
Oh Daddy I love you."

The dads all applauded and then, they sang a short song.

"Daddy Day, Daddy Day
Is a very special day.
Here's a great big hug,
And lots of kisses too.
Each one says that I love you!"

More applause.

Then, the kids ran to their cubbies and each one grabbed a card and ran back. Salma handed hers to him.

It was all blue.

Then, she hugged him.

"I love you, Baba."

"I love you, too, Salma," Tim whispered.

After a couple of minutes, Ms. Judy got everyone's attention again.

"All right. Thank you so much for coming and letting us meet you and learn more about you. If any of you have to go to work now, you can go and if you can stay, please do while we try to learn something today."

There was some laughter and more than half of the men in the room stood up to leave.

"Okay, Salma. I'll see you tonight when I get home."

To her credit, Salma didn't protest. She gave him one more hug and then waved as he walked out of the room. He knew that there were some of the dads staring at him as he walked to his car, but he tried to be casual and just smiled at them and then got into his car and headed to work.

However, part way there, he pulled off to the side and sat for a few moments in the car. Then, slowly, he lifted his shirt and touched the small white scars on his side. So many scars but it was always these first ones that he came back to. He didn't know how Salma had known he didn't like going places where he wouldn't be wearing a shirt. He and Zahara had made the decision to let her know that her dad had been hurt before, although without telling any details. He sighed and then looked at the card Salma had made for him sitting on the seat. He smiled and picked it up. She must have used up an entire blue crayon coloring the cover. Then, he opened it and read the message she'd written.

There was a picture of Tim and Salma playing in the sandbox. A blue sandbox.

I love you, Baba. You are great. I love to play in the sand with you.

Tim laughed a little and took a deep breath. If nothing else, Salma's simple love always made him feel better. That was enough to get him back on track. He drove to work and headed inside.

Muna and Lara were at their desks. Tony wasn't there.

"Hey! How was it, Tim?" Lara asked.

"It was...awkward, but Salma only embarassed me a little bit," Tim said, smiling.

Muna laughed. "That's what kids are supposed to do, isn't it? That's what my younger brother was really good at. What did she say?"

"It's a good thing that she's cute. That's all I'll say about it," Tim said and sat down at his desk.

"Oh, come on, Tim! You've got to give us something," Lara said in a wheedling tone.

"No, I don't, but to give you a sampling of the kinds of things the kids were saying, one little girl said that her dad was the best poker player because he always took her out for ice cream after having his friends over."

Muna laughed.

"And that wasn't you, huh?" Tony asked as he walked in.

"Nope. I'm not the one who gambles in this room," Tim said with a grin. "Am I, Tony."

"I'm not saying a word," Tony said. "We don't have anything going at the moment, just paperwork."

"And it's really boring," Lara said. "But Muna is getting some nice practice."

"Yeah. Thanks, Lara," Muna said.

Tony gave Tim a look but didn't say anything. Tim just smiled.

For now, things were actually okay. He could hope that they'd last.